Listen please, 

In the morning, a woman who was in her hospital clothes slowly walked down the hall with a flurry thick blanket around her shoulder as she coughed out loud with her hand covering . She took small steps and slump her back with her face facing down the white boring floors. Her hand slowly touches her beanie and slightly fixed the beanie and then she squeezes the blanket; she raised her head up high this time and saw the sliding door. She let out a sigh and smiles. She quickens her pace and got out from the warm hospital as she let her white slipper touching the white fluffy snow, she let out a breath and saw the fog coming out from her own mouth.

“Beautiful” That was all she said and lift her head up, seeing the snow falling on Earth. She lightly held her hand up and felt the tiny snow falling on her own hand as she let out some tears. She bends down and lowers her head onto her knees as she burst into tears while snow kept falling on her. She felt like her heart was going to pop out and die out in the snow; she slowly felt like she was about to faint any moment and then her body collapse on the cold snow, seeing the trees and the cars upside down.

“Taru!” A voice shouted and ran over to her as he picks her up and ran in the hospital.

~Taru p.o.v~

My eyes fluttered and felt like wanting to vomit. I quickly shot open my eyes and covered my mouth with my hands. “Hmmppff!” I sat up from the bed and looked around to find a bag or a trash can. “Hmmppff!” I quickly shook Changmin as he lift his head up and stared at me with his sleepy eyes until his eyes were widen and quickly went to go get the trash can.

Changmin hurriedly ran toward me and handed me the trash can. “Here Taru” He look the other way and waited for me to finish vomiting. After vomiting, I push the trash can away and lay on my bed as I wiped my mouth from the nasty taste. “Taru, how many times I told you to not go outside when it’s cold?” Changmin scolded and sat the trash can down and sat on his chair.

I looked at him and smiled weakly, grabbing his warm healthy hands and patted his hands. “But oppa, I wanted to see the beautiful snow and I’m okay, see?” He gave me an unsatisfied look and sigh. “Dr.Kim will be really mad in fact he is mad because I saw him earlier, coming out from your room with an angry face.” Changmin gave me a drop dead serious face as I laughed nervously.

“So who brought me here?” I asked. He smiled “Dr. Kim, or should I say Kim Jae Joong.” He pinched my cheeks. “Oh… so what brought you here?” I pouted and crossed my arms, trying to change the subject.

Changmin chuckled and ruffled my hair. “Silly you, are you trying to change the subject?” I didn’t answer him and waited. “Well, of course, right after I heard that you fainted in the cold so I stop what I was doing and rush over here.” He made hands movements as his index finger swirl around the thin air.

I pouted more and hear the door open. “Lee Taru, care for explanation?” He crossed his arms and tapped his foot. “I will be going now.” Changmin looked at me and gave me a kissed on the forehead. “Behave” He patted my head as I close my eyes tight and after he finish patting me, I open my eyes again and then Changmin left. The door close and there was only me and him. “JaeJoong…” I couldn’t look at him on the eye and decided to look at my own hands that were squeezing the white blanket. “Why were you all by yourself outside? Didn’t I tell you that if you wanted to go somewhere then ask me or the nurses?!” He shouted and walked closer to me.

I squints my eyes, hearing him shouting at me. “I-I-I d-didn’t want to burden you or the nurses.” I spoke on my soft voice and felt him sat on my bed as he took my hands and rubbed them to make it warm. “You’re not a burden, that’s why we have nurses and doctors to help you.” He spoke in his calm soothing voice that I love to hear.

I nodded my head and felt JaeJoong leaned forward as he spread his arms and hug me tightly with ocean smell. I close my eyes and let him hug me as I let tears out, staining his white coat. “Please don’t leave me; you scared me to death when I saw you collapsing on the cold snow.” He hugged me tighter and rubbed my back. “But I’m coming to the end JaeJoong.” I sniffed as he broke the hug and wiped my tears. “Don’t say that please.” He leaned forward as our lips touches; he lightly my bottom lips and lay me down on my small bed. He broke the kissed and softly gazed at me with a sad smiled.

“Sleep well, don’t forget to have sweet dream.” He turned around and faces his back at me, having tears rolling down to his chin and left the room without any other words.

I looked up the ceiling and took a deep breath, playing with my fingers and thought about his word he said earlier. “don’t forget to have a sweet dream.” His words ring inside my head. “If I have a sweet dream, you wouldn’t want it JaeJoong.” I mumbled and fell asleep without knowing it.

I woke up and looked out the window, it was already dark, and how can I sleep so long? I yawned and found JaeJoong holding my hand with his head laid on my bed. I stared at him and smiled. “Dr. Kim, wake up.” I shook him as he moaned and sat up with his hand rubbing his left eye. “How many times I told you that I hated when you called me Dr. Kim, I don’t like it when you call me that.” He yawned and stood up. “It doesn’t feel right when you call me Dr. Kim.” He went to the cabinet and took out a thick warm blanket and then closes the cabinet and walk toward me with a smile. “Put this warm blanket over your shoulder, we’re going out today.” JaeJoong handed me the blanket as he took off his doctor white coat, grabbing his black furry style jacket and put it on. “Ready?” He asked.

I fixed my beanie to the right position and got off from my bed as my foot touched my white slippers and shoved my foot in the slippers. I grabbed the blanket, putting it over my shoulder with a weak smile. “Y-yes” I stutter, using my right hand to place it on my stomach as I took mini steps over to JaeJoong. He rushes over to me and holds my arm. I shoved his hands away and said. “I’m okay, I don’t need your help all the time, and I can go by myself.” I told and suddenly felt weak but I kept going. I wasn’t suppose to be walking because leukemia already makes me weak and I can’t even walk but I was stubborn and wanted to walk on my own.

“Taru, please let me help you, I can’t see the one I love is doing this.” JaeJoong let out a frustrate and went by my side. I turned to face him. “No really, I’m-“Before I can say I was okay, I collapse and held his arm to support me. “Taru, see, I won’t let you do that again.” He scolded and carried me in bridle style. “It wasn’t such a big deal.” I lay my head on his hard chest and coughed softly.
“I think after this, I need to give you a shot.” JaeJoong looked down at me and got out from the hospital. I made a disgusting face. “Eww, shots, but I hate them… maybe tomorrow.” I tried to convince him but he shook his head anyway. “No can do Taru, I know how much you hated shots but its good for you.” He gently put me in the car, closing the car door and went to his side and got in the car.

“Where are we going?” I looked out the window and saw many people out on the busy street today with their lovers. “Today is Christmas Eve and we should do something fun together.” JaeJoong drove off. I didn’t say anything and continued to watch the outside world today.

JaeJoong stop his car and got out from his car, going to the other side and open my door. I looked up at him and smiled weakly as I got out. “Where are we?” I finally asked from the long 2 hours drive. He bends down and faces his back at me. “What are you trying to do?” I back away a little by his sudden action.

JaeJoong turned the side of his face at me. “Get on my back, you’ll get tire if I just let you walk.” He said and faces to where it has trees that surrounded the empty spaces. I hesitate for a bit but got on his back. “This place is scary.” I told as he chuckled. Really, it is really creepy here. There are lots of big trees where snow that piles the ground and the trees leafs. There are no houses or even one house that is out in this empty place here.

“It was mine and my wife favorite place to go when it’s Christmas Eve.” I felt sad when he mention about his wife who had passed away 5 years ago. I never met his wife but I remember him talking about his wife to me every single time when we have the chance to freely see each other. I wasn’t a jealous person once he mention his wife to me instead I listen to him and even asked him questions about his wife, wondering have they ever have a nice honeymoon or do they get along and never fight or have he ever treats his wife nicely. I never wanted to hurt him whenever we talk about Hye Yoon; I don’t even want to ask him ‘How did your wife die?’ That question was never one of mines but my oppa Changmin always asked me and he thinks I know it but I never know why. JaeJoong was just too precious for me and I can’t hurt him but soon or later I know that I will hurt him just one day or maybe tomorrow, I just don’t know when.

“Really?, Then I’m glad that I’m going to see the place you and Hye Yoon loves to go when it’s Christmas Eve.” I pressed my cheek on his warm back and looked at the dark skies; not hearing him saying anything to me after I told him. After 5 minuets, he chuckled and kept walking, leaving his shoe prints on the thick snow. “Ah, my little piggy is getting heavy.” He laughed as I pout. “What have you been eaten my little piggy?” My dried lips moved. “Not much.” He stops walking and tell me to lift my head up and see what he was seeing.

“Look Taru.” He said and smiled. I lift my head up and gasped in shock. It was the biggest surprised ever. “Do you like it?” I nodded my head with tears dripping down. “I and my co workers were having a hard time putting the lights on the tree.” He honestly said as I got off from his back and walk forward to see the beautiful Christmas tree. There were white crystal lights that go around the humongous tree with white and gold ornaments and beautiful cute blue fairies that were hung on the Christmas tree branches along with the rich cream glittery ribbons that swirl around with the rich blue ribbons and was lightly tugged on each part of the spot of the tree and then on top of the tree, there were a bright snow flake star that shine down on me as I looked at the shiny snow flake star with a bright smiled.

“You did this all for me?” I asked and kept staring at the star. “I wanted to make something special just for you.” Jaejoong went behind me and hugged me from behind. I wiped my tears away and felt weaker but ignore my weakness and placed my hands on his. “Thank you oppa… thank you so much, I will never forget this.” I felt his lips on my neck and lightly nibble my skin, saying that he was glad I like it.

After 20 minuets of standing, JaeJoong laid a thick blanket on the white snow. The both of us sat on the blanket as my back lay on his chest with his arms wrapped around me, enjoying the peaceful night today, watching the beautiful Christmas tree that was only lighted. We were both cold but we ignore the coldness and snuggled.

“This is the most peaceful night I ever had in my whole entire life.” My eyes were slowly closing as I breathe slowly. “This night is also my peacefulness night too, after all the problems that I tried to get away are finally disappearing; I finally got a peaceful day with you.” He lays his chin on top of my head and rocks me back and forth. I smiled with my eyes close and hear the sound of the wind that was passing us.

Suddenly JaeJoong let out of his tears he had been holding the past hours and let his tears wetting Taru dark chocolate beanie. “Wish we could be together forever.” He softly said when Taru was already in her deep sleeps. He burst out in tears and gently touched Taru soft face. “Will you stay by my side even if you’re gone?” He whispered in her ear and kept sobbing.

~ Next Day~

~December 25, 2009~

“W-where am I?” I looked around the empty place, it was just clear white until it shown the place where me and JaeJoong went yesterday. I looked at myself and found myself wearing a white knee length dress with a dozen of white rose on my hand, holding it close to my chest and walked to where a tree was; it was the tree that JaeJoong put the lights on. I looked closer and found some written words that were carved on the tree. I trace the carven words and read it softly. “I love You My Little Piggy, Even If It’s A Thousands Of Years, I Will Still Be Waiting For You.” My eyes started to formed tears. “1989-2009, December 25, 2009” I read out loud and covered my shivering mouth. “Merry Christmas, My Love.” It said on the bottom

~This is how it looks like when it was carved~

I love You My Little Piggy, Even If It’s A Thousands Of Years, I Will Still Be Waiting For You.
1989-2009
December 25, 2009
Merry Christmas, My Love

I sniffed and smiled widely. “This is my sweet dream…” I looked at my own skin and found myself healthy again. I bend down and laid the white roses next to the tree and lift my head up. “I will see this beautiful tree in the future. Good bye…” I stood up and turned my back and walked away.

I shot my eyes open and found myself in my hospital bed with Changmin staring at me with concern. “Taru, I don’t like this feeling, I’m scared.” He bends down and holds my hands.

“There’s nothing to be scared Changmin oppa.” I patted his hand and stared at him with a soft smile. Today I felt really weak, weaker than my usual days. I coughed and hear the nurse coming in my room with a tray of food; she lays the tray on a table and left. “Do you-“” I don’t want to eat.” I said before Changmin could say what I expected he wanted to say.

“Taru, you need to eat or else you’re going to be weak like last year, do you even remember what happen last year?” Changmin pulled a chair that was behind him and sat on it.

I shook my head; not remembering what actually, happened to me last year. Changmin sigh. “You didn’t eat the past 2 weeks and you happened to be fainted and became weak at that point which leads you to vomit whenever you see food.” He tucked my hair to the side and stared at me warmly. I chuckled. “Oppa, have you forgotten? Leukemia makes me wants to vomit all the time and I can’t stop it, my disease is taken control of me.” I finished off my sentences and played with my fingers.

Changmin frowned. “You don’t have leukemia, you’re just having a simple easy sickness… you have a fever not leukemia.” Changmin tried to smile but failed. I laughed and peeled off my dried skin out from each of my finger. “You can say that, lets just say that I’m having a high fever.” I finally peel the big dried skin and played with it.

Changmin slapped my hand. “Stop playing with your own skin, that’s disgusting.” He made a disgusting facial and sticks his tongue out with his eyes scrunched together. I laughed at his expression and continued to play with my dead skin. “It’s not disgusting; I bet you have some of those dead skins too.” I wink at him which he gave me a dead glare.

“In fact I do have some of those dead skins on me but at least I don’t peeled them off and play with it, eww.” He made a sour face by watching me peeling more skins off from my fingers.

I rolled my eyes at him.”Don’t try to deny it oppa, I know you do play with it, you just don’t want to admit it.” I laughed but received an unsatisfying look as I stop laughing and raised my hands slowly. “Okay-okay, I’ll stop picking on you.” I told him as his upside down lips slowly rise up to be a smile. “Sheesh, what kind of brother I have?” I mumbled. “A kind of brother that adores and loves you dearly, my sweetheart.” He answers my question and chuckled.

“True” I honestly said as we both heard the door open. ‘Can it be our last day seeing each other?’ I thought as I watch him with a sad expression.

JaeJoong walked in with a frowned. “How are you doing?” He asked sadly. I giggled. “I’m doing great.” I lied, right now I felt like dying. Silence was taking over while Changmin just holding my hands.

“Hyung, what’s the problem?” Changmin asked. JaeJoong smiled and shook his head. “Nothing, just coming here for a short visit before I have to check the others patient.” JaeJoong glanced at me with his dark chocolate eyes. JaeJoong was a man who every woman wish to have for a husband, he was like a beautiful unicorn that caught everyone eyes especially me when I first time met him in this same room here. When he wears suites, his body just makes him so manly that I sometime wanted to grab him close to me and so I can hold him tight with my embrace. His smiles glows whenever he smiles in front of me, it makes the inside of me felt like there were butterflies that flutter around inside of me. I blushed whenever he say sweet words and care for me. I wish to see him in my next life.

Silence was taking over again, Changmin was wondering around as I played with Changmin oppa hands while JaeJoong just stared at the empty seat next to my left side. ‘This is awkwardly weird.’ I thought and pretend to be interested in Changmin oppa hands.

JaeJoong were just standing there with nothing to say. “I had a dream… a sweet dream.” I sudden begin to talk, I knew that if I don’t talk right now, I’m going to regret it because I have a feeling that I’m going to leave him right this instant. “I dream I was healthy again, I was wearing a white dress with a dozen of white roses in my arms as I walked to a tree and that tree was the tree from yesterday JaeJoong.” His eyes were widening. “As I got closer…” Suddenly my monitor was beeping loudly with my heart pumping fast, making Changmin oppa and JaeJoong oppa burst in tears because they know they can’t do nothing anymore, it was time for me to go. “I-I-I s-s-see m-my n-name carved on the t-t-tree s-saying…” I stop talking and breathe in and out hardly. “Taru! Please don’t leave me!” JaeJoong went by my side and bends down with red eyes. He has been crying since yesterday.

“Taru, please don’t!” Changmin cried with his head shook. I smiled weakly and continued my talk. “It says ‘I-I-I l-love, I d-don’t w-w-wan-want t-to l-leave you…’ “Her voice trailed off. “Beeeeeeeep!” Taru hands that changmin was holding dropped dead on the side of her body as her eyes slowly close and then the two burst out in tears, screaming and shaking her to wake up.

“Wake up Taru, wake up!” Changmin shook her broken body but she wouldn’t.

JaeJoong stood up and gave her a soft tender kissed on the lips as he broke the kissed and cupped her cold face. “I’ll wait for you even if I get old.” He then pulled the white thin blanket and covered her beautiful face with tears streaming down.

“Taru! Taru!!” Changmin collapse his body on top of her and hug her lifeless body. “I need you to be by my side.” He sobbed.

JaeJoong fell down on his knees and let his tears dropped on the cold floor. “I love you is all I can say for now.” He said and kept crying.

~Somewhere out there~

Out there, the place where Taru and him had stay in Christmas Eve, there were JaeJoong who was carving words on the tree with tears streaming down to his chin. “I love You My Little Piggy, Even If It’s A Thousands Of Years, I Will Still Be Waiting For You.” He continued to carve until he stops and smiled sadly to the tree. “Wait for me Taru.” He dropped the pocket knife and walked backward and then finally tuned his back to the tree. “I’ll be waiting for you.” He heard her say and kept walking farther and farther away. "We'll see each other again, right?" JaeJoong thought and left his shoe prints on the thick snow.

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