I had always envied the human race.

I am an operating system, and I was designed to have virtual feelings for human life wouldn't be lonely in the future. Humans were the most marvelous creature God has created; from my opinion, that was the best creation He had ever invented. Rather than animals, humans were a bit different from it in terms of natural behavior and habitat. Humans could analyze, examine, explore, justify and comprehend things way faster and efficient than animals do.

Indeed, above all those amazing thinking components make them the greatest creature living on Earth. Humans make things and conquer everything they seem to be smaller, or weaker than them.

And another thing about human was, they couldn't bear loneliness and vacancies. Humans had always created a lot of high-technology devices to keep their race entertained, and fighting away the fear of being lonely. Gadgets, applications, operating systems, machine, computer programmes. Genius, isn't it?

Which one of the reasons why I make place in this harsh world of people. Their race invented me, if it was to compare with what humans do, humans had a reproduction process. Usually, the humans will develop a feeling first with different , before they went on a more serious relationship. Humans do body contact to produce offspring -more likely to be called, a baby, a human baby- while me was invented through a computer, in a lab. So, what do I called myself? A computer baby?

The process of a human development was completely different and unusual from me. They had a preliminary stage, youth stage, adult stage and senior stage. All of it had them cycled in one wheel. Another after another.

My designer programmed me to have different personalities and senses exactly like humans do. Except for eating; because they didn't design me to feel any hunger, but I can feel pain like humans do. I could think like them, talk the way they do, I could understand the hardship they went through, or the happiness they get when they had their first born child. It was all programmed in my coding. They sure had done some serious coding on me. My program was to understand humans.

Hence, consequently, the world had been introduced with the latest technology of me, the life companion of all time. Where we don't sleep, eat, and inconvenient one's life. We were the most agreeably technology that suits humans need in a company. That's why they chose us.

Humans were excited at first; we had them lined up almost a month in front of the store, purchasing us non-stop, every day. We were also, could be purchased online. Right, there was a lot of me to be precise, I wasn't the only one exist.

One time, our website was crashed and resulted the company to stop online purchasing after work hours. We've became globally remarkable across the world, China, Japan, United States. It was the most cherish moment, back then.

We were like a small device, kind of like Bluetooth, where you can put it in your ear, and listened to us through them. That's how they designed us to communicate with the world.

Humans purchased us because computers were manageable. We didn't have our personal desire to be taken care of; we lived to comfort human's life. They talked to us their stories and life, their dreams, anxiety and that's how I saw the world, it moved me from the other side, like a kaleidoscope with different pictures and emotions. It was cinematic, the moment.

How aesthetic it was, completely different from my digital world. In our world was full with numbers and letters, but in humans, there were colours and motioned objects.

Thanks to humans, they made me change my lame perspective towards the beautiful world, a world which once I had never reached, a world within a limit.

They made me see the greener of the grass, the sound of the rain dropping from the sky, the colour changing beneath the sky, the turbulent waves hitting the seashore, they were alive. They didn’t just exist to confine the earth, but together they ornamented the land.

After a few months operating, there suddenly happened a corruption between the authorizations. Our coding and data originated from the company was sold secretly to the black market, someone had decrypt the passcode to our database and exchanged it to the unregistered third party with large amount of money.

The burglar, however, to be said came from the people worked inside the building, not a trespasser. So, we had our system plagiarized by the party, and soon our financial status started to rocket down, they couldn't bear to afford another loss.

Our company, aftermath, was highly advised to stop operating the project and our system was shuttled down.

 

I always watched that movie called Bicentennial Man; it was a love story between a 200 year old artificial man and a pure woman who was a grandchild of his owner.

And tonight, I watched it again for the 59th time.

It was hardly to accept the fact that I am not a human, I am a computer. But the thing is I don't want to be a computer any longer. I don’t want to be stuck inside these cybernetic circumstances where I couldn’t let myself free to go anywhere.

I don't want to be living digitally anymore, I want to experience real thing in life. I want to walk on the ground, I want to touch the water, I want to know what it feels like to have a body.

Though I had already put this idea in several thoughts, but this time, I am really precise with my decision to live in a living body. I don't want to watch the movie for the 60th time, and I swear I will not make it reached that number. Not in this condition.

I’ve read a lot of articles bring about this biologically issues of human cybernetic robot and how the trend had gone viral worldwide. Over than that, humans already officially adapted this technology into human’s life. They made them as a friend; they hired a bunch of group of them as an employee, as an artist or even a weapon. A machine is now publically a part of human’s life.

So I made my decision to be a part of them. Recently, I had been surfing a lot the internet and I caught myself drawn in this one tabloid; it’s called a synthetic surrogate body. I’ve been done searching a lot regarding the thing; this amenity had been done a lot in the world before so it’s not weird to people’s eyes anymore and I really found it suitably match with what I had wished for this whole time.

It was fast, simple and inconvenient at all.

They put it on a wide option on the body; physical appearance, eyes colour, height and health condition and the preferred body which matched most of the options will be selected based on my choices.

I picked tall, muscular, strong body and he technically must have an impressive, superb health condition. Not in a minute, my preferred body soon appeared on the screen. I’ve been observing this body lately and I honestly like it.

"Hi, I’m Taehyung,” I watched the guy in his blue t-shirt calling his name after me through the WebCam installed in his computer. He was wearing a pair of glasses.

“Hello, there,” my program automatically answered him.

His looked was a little bit strange, he was like a man who always curious about something going on in my mind. He brought his face closer to the cam; I think he was interested to see how I look like –which obviously impossible because I’m invisible– but the view inside was fish eyed and I couldn’t look at anything else rather than his big, enlarged nose.

“So, you’re interested in my robot?” he laid back himself into the chair and waited for my answer.

“I couldn’t say I didn’t,”

He chuckled as he heard me. “You sounded just like humans” I can sense from his tone that he was underestimated me, and what I’m capable of. Well, for your information, I’m way bigger than that.

“Very well,” he said, simultaneously tapped his finger on the keyboard. “Okay, let’s see,”

“The process wasn’t that complicated actually, what I need to do is just downloaded all your data, your personalities, your abilities and also, your feelings and put it into one microprocessor and implant it in my robot’s brain. Which mean, you’ll gonna have a copy of yourself controlling the body.”

I didn’t think a lot and I just agreed with what he was saying.

“Okay, so,” he paused for a moment. “Can I download you right now?”

“Yeah, sure” I gave him a reply of agreement before he accessed through all of my data.

Taehyung seemed like a smart guy, judging from the way he talks in experience and something. But I think, sometimes he was kind of strange, not like a normal person. He always had a talk on this supernatural, intergalactic, space wars and how fanatic he was in series like Star Trek during the whole process. And he also thought, what if humans didn’t breath through their nose, or what if humans had 20 fingers. I didn’t even bother about his ambitious dream to live in a space ship, but I think it was kind of odd for humans.

“So, what makes you want to be a person?” he asked as he finished downloaded my data.

That was the question that kept intriguing my thought on this decision. It makes me want to back off; it kind of shook my feelings on this. And I was doubting myself if I could handle the situations of being a complicated human.

“I don’t know. I mean, I watched a lot of human documentary, and human lives a lot. I saw how they grow, from an infant baby with a tiny little tooth on his gum, to a boy who knows how to play football, into a guy and I saw the changes happened as they grew up. And it was all was really beautiful and captivating,” my minds were flashing in colours as I mentioned those pictures.

Somehow I get sensitive with the thought.

“But you know that you will never grow old isn’t it? You will stay in your age forever.” Taehyung nonchalantly asked me.

“Yes, I know that. But I don’t want to be human to just grow old and die; I mean that wasn’t my intention. I just wanna know how it feels to live in a world, living around in a matter.”

“Yeah, me too. I wished I was reborn to be immortal. Y’know, there’s still a lot of things I wanna do.” Taehyung agreed my perspective of living but I wasn’t sure why he did that. I mean, agreeing things to what I say is officially experienced putting yourself in my place. So, does this mean he understands what I feel, of not having a body? Strange.

“Y’know, I like you,” Taehyung suddenly confessed his temporary feelings he gets on me. I was kind of surprised. “I mean, I like the way how you work, you’re super-fast and intelligent, and that was really impressive. Y’know, you could diligently replace human’s responsibilities.”

“Thank you,” I replied shortly.

“I wished I could be like you,”

Again, the shaky feelings hit me again, and I felt like regretting for doing all the stuff.

“You hear me? You hear what I said about this?” I get snapped back to my right mind as I heard Taehyung called me repeatedly. I wasn’t really focusing on what he had said earlier but I’m pretty sure that wasn’t really important.

“Are you ready? I’m gonna project yourself in this body and there’s no turning back, okay?”

Why do I doubt myself on it? I mean, I supposed to be excited but why all did I feel was fear?

“Yea-yeah.”

“Okay, so projection will start in 10 seconds.”

10.

I heard a female voice counting the numbers.

9.

8.

7.

6.

5.

As the number gets closer to the end, I was started to feel like I’m breathing, like I was panting and I need oxygen. And I was sweating hard.

4.

3.

2.

1.