Today was difficult. Seungyoon had practically camped in the studio for the past three months and his songs were still not being approved for Winner's new album. It was a process he was used to, but no less frustrating each time it happened. Seungyoon wanted nothing more to go home and sleep for two weeks, maybe have a drink too.

     "Seungyoon-ah you can leave now, get some rest. Let someone else rot away in this room," teases Seunghoon, they'd been working side by side for the past couple of months trying to make this album happen while the other members tried to keep the fans happy. 

     "You should go home to Seunghoon, maybe see your parents. It might inspire a song that YG will like," replies Seungyoon. He closes his tattered notebook and his eye catches on a doodle with something written in a distinct Hangul. The name Nam Taehyun flashes through his mind and Seungyoon is taken back.

     Long hair, middle part, furrowed eyebrows, and a beautiful smile. The images that he had in one point in his life played over and over again in a dulled, confused mind come rushing back. Memories that were beginning to gray around the edges rush back, much more vivid and distinctly painful. He sees a flash of teeth and a playful kiss. He sees pale shoulders and soft eye smiles. He can feel his own plush lips tracing tattoos, mapping a body that was everything to him at a point in time. He hears an enchanting voice trying to pacify his nightmares. And then it comes to him, the broken smiles that he had failed to catch, the spiraling out of control. The look of hurt. 

     "Seungyoon I'm heading home now, you should really go. You've been staring at the wall for over an hour," comments Seunghoon, patting him on the shoulder. Seunghoon exits the studio and Seungyoon slowly comes to his senses at the closing of the door. Seungyoon slowly gets up, putting random things in his bag and exits the studio. 

     The gust of cold air wakes Seungyoon up a little more. He decides that he wants to walk home. He pulls his mask high and his cap low. There was less chance of being seen at this time of night by fans. Especially since most of the fans were camping in front of the broadcasting station Minho and Jinwoo were currently at. As he walks his thoughts are curiously empty but his legs seem to lead him somewhere. His eye catches on an open pub. There is music and cheap alcohol, maybe having a drink out would help him to write better songs. He walks inside, making sure to keep his head low. 

     He sits at the bar and calls the bartender over to order a drink. "Soju please," Seungyoon requests. The bartender scans his face and a flash of recognition comes across his face.

     "There's someone here who might want to meet you." Seungyoon is too busy figuring out how to nicely reject the bartender, get a drink, and not draw attention to himself to recognize the voice that he had heard for a significant period of time in his life. 

     "Sorry, I don't really want to meet people, I'm afraid of you know," Seungyoon tries to explain.

     "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone except this one guy, if you meet him all your drinks will be on me," the bartender offers. The tantalizing offer of free alcohol clouds his judgement, he'd had a hard couple of months maybe free alcohol wouldn't be too bad. Maybe meeting the fan would boost his confidence or something. 

     "Fine," Seungyoon agrees.

     "Great, once he finishes singing I'll bring him over." Seungyoon decides that he needs a couple more drinks in order to greet this fan. He feels much calmer and decidedly more pleasant by the time the bartender motions a figure over. 

     "I'm pretty sure he's a big producer, maybe he'll get your band on the big stage," the bartender says excitedly.

     "I told you I'm fine with where we are, besides I produce too it's not like I need a big company to pick us up," a distinctly familiar voice says.

     "Just meet him, if anything maybe it'll help you to write another song," says the bartender. The words producer and song writer whir around in his head, trying to make a connection to the familiar voice.

     "Here sir, this is my friend Nam Taehyun, he's apart of--" Seungyoon immediately drowns out the man's voice at the words Nam Taehyun. He makes eye contact with the one and only Nam Taehyun who caused his world to turn upside down. He looks almost ethereal, blond hair and warm brown eyes. He looks decidedly more healthy Seungyoon decides. There are slight smile lines that weren't there before. There are more tattoos and more lean muscles. 

     "Seungyoon hyung" gasps Taehyun when he makes eye contact with the man he had a spent what feels like a lifetime with. 

     "Do you two know each other?" asks the bartender. Both ignore the bartender, Seungyoon curiously feels no anger or sadness, just a resounding emptiness.

     "Seungyoon," Taehyun says his name once more and the way it rolls of his tongue is familiar.  

     "Do you want to come home with me?" asks Seungyoon, not sure himself why he asked. Him and Taehyun hold eye contact, Taehyun reading his eyes for an ulterior motive. 

     "Sure, let's go now though," says Taehyun. 

     "Shouldn't you tell your band members won't they worry?" asks the bartender. Taehyun shakes his head and motions for Seungyoon to follow him. 

     "Taehyun who's that, a new member?" asks what appears to Seungyoon as the band's drummer. A pang of jealousy shoots through his stomach when he realizes the man is attractive. 

     "He's--" Taehyun pauses, unsure where to place Seungyoon. His instincts from his idol days seem to be intact when he labels Seungyoon as a friend that had come to see him. It wasn't the complete truth, but it wasn't a complete lie. "We're going to his house to have a couple drinks, don't worry about me." 

     "All right Leader-ssi, have a good night. Bye mysterious man," says one of the girls from the back of the dressing room, that label causes a pang in his chest. A warm hand wraps around his and he is led out. They quickly exit the pub and Seungyoon starts leading Taehyun to his house without any other thought. The hand fits familiarly in his, the large coat that hides their joined hand is almost nostalgic. Their similar fashion hiding their identity almost tricks Seungyoon to believing that this was the old days. 

     "So how is it going now?" asks Seungyoon.

     "Good," Taehyun pauses, "I'm happy."

     "I'm glad," Seungyoon simply replies. 

     "You're a producer now," Taehyun states. 

     "And so are you," Seungyoon replies. Taehyun hums in assent. They walk in a comfortable silence, they appear in front of Seungyoon's home and the door is pushed open to reveal Minho and Jinwoo sprawled out. Seunghoon can be heard singing from the kitchen. "What are you brats doing here?" asks Seungyoon.

     "Aren't you glad to see us Leader-nim?" asks Jinwoo, puppy eyes appearing. 

     "Who's the pretty lady? I thought you weren't into women Seungyoon," says Minho. The confidence he had before about bringing Taehyun melts away at the presence of s. He can feel Taehyun squeeze his hand and attempt to back out, realizing that there were more guests than they had planned for initially. 

     "Woman? Is there a woman? Seungyoonie you told us you were single, unless this is a hookup that we just ruined," Seunghoon walks out and stops. His eyes scan over the figure obscured by the darkness. "Come in why don't you, we can eat together. The man next to you looks uncomfortable, did you not tell him you're a celebrity?"

     "Seunghoon don't make the guy uncomfortable," Seungyoon can hear Jinwoo getting up and padding over. He feels Taehyun tug on his shirt now, indicating that he didn't know what to do. Seungyoon squeezes Taehyun's hand back, indicating it's to late to leave now. 

     "Why don't the two of you get out of the doorway, we don't bite," says Jinwoo. His soft doe eyes curiously glance at the figure. Jinwoo smiles warmly not to scare the "new" man. When Seungyoon steps out of the shadow and a familiar hand wrist tattoo appears Jinwoo gasps. "Is that who I think it is?"

     "Who is it? Is it the one we caught Seungyoon with in bed last time?" Minho and Seunghoon walk over, both curious. They only see a hand yanked out of Seungyoon's hand and a hard yank forward from the shorter man. The taller figure comes out of the light and falls into Jinwoo's arms. Minho looks surprised and then a thinly veiled, age-old anger bubbles to the surface. Seunghoon's eyes widen and he makes his way dazedly over to his former member. 

     "My baby, oh my baby," Jinwoo begins to cry, "my precious maknae." 

     "I'm here," Taehyun says awkwardly.

     "Welcome back Taehyunie," greets Jinwoo. 

     "You still look young hyung," Taehyun remarks, his arms wrap around Jinwoo, bringing his precious hyung closer.

     "Why are you here Taehyun," asks Minho, voice acidic. There is hurt in the older man's eyes, disbelief the one member that had left their band was back, in front of him. Especially after their argument that had left both parties deeply hurt. 

     "I--" Taehyun pauses, Seungyoon opens his mouth but Taehyun shares a look. "I'm here to talk, I was here to talk to Seungyoon hyung, but all of you are here so."

     "Come in and eat, for real," says Seunghoon, "let me see him Jinwoo." Jinwoo reluctantly releases the former maknae and lets Seunghoon get a good look at him.

     "You still have that ridiculous middle part," remarks Seunghoon, "and those goofy eyebrows." Seunghoon tries to lighten the mood, not only the band's but his as well. There is still a feeling of disbelief that the member who had survived with them, that left them, and was suddenly back was actually real.

     "Your personality hasn't changed at all hyung," says Taehyun. The group walks to the table and a silent Minho follows behind, thoughts bouncing around in his mind, unsure how to react to the ex-member. Seungyoon pulls Minho aside gently to talk and Taehyun is reminded of how good a leader Seungyoon is. Taehyun had grown an immense appreciation for Seungyoon as a leader when he started his own band. He realized how hard it is to keep something together. 

     "Tell us about your life now," Jinwoo says, his hand grabs Taehyun's almost as if he's afraid if he's going to evaporate into thin air.  Taehyun hurts inside, he remembers how his hyung hates to say goodbye and how he must have tore him up leaving. 

     "Its good, I still live with my parents, I make a decent amount of money too."

     "Tell us about your music too," says Seunghoon. Taehyun remembers composing with Seunghoon and trying to get that one song just right. Working with his current members just isn't the same. There is something different from Winner, he had died and been reborn in a sense with these boys, no men Taehyun corrects himself. 

     "I was doing a lot of band work, but I'm scaling back to more producing now."

     Minho enters and sits next to Taehyun. "Hello," Minho says, he smiles, a smile Taehyun never imagined he would see again after their big argument when Taehyun left. "I'm sorry for how I acted earlier," says Minho. 

     "Its fine, I'm sorry for everything," says Taehyun. They exchange a look and Taehyun remembers how easily he gels with Minho. There is a spark of forgiveness and for that Taehyun is grateful. "Thank you for letting me join you for dinner."

     "Don't worry about it, we're glad our real maknae is here, someone we can actually baby," says Seungyoon. He doesn't bother to correct that Taehyun isn't technically their maknae because he left Winner, to all the members he would always be the maknae.

     "Yah, I'm not your baby any more," says Taehyun teasingly. A small smile blooming on his face.

     "You'll always be our baby," says Jinwoo; Taehyun smiles at the mat-hyung.

     "Come visit us more Taehyun," says Seunghoon. 

     "We should talk and drink together," says Minho. 

     "I'll come by more often, I promise," says Taehyun, the sincerity evident in his voice.

     "For real this time, right?" asks Jinwoo. 

     "Of course, now that I know where Seungyoon lives I'll be coming here way more often," winks Taehyun.

     "Gross, don't do things while we're here," says Seunghoon. Seungyoon observes the men together and a real smile appears. He catches Taehyun's eye and beams. Taehyun smiles and Seungyoon suddenly doesn't feel as empty. 

---

     "And this weeks first place goes to Winner!" announces the host. The men around him jump up and down excitedly. Seungyoon's eyes search the crowd for a certain someone and frowns when he doesn't find the now black haired man he was looking for. The men walk off stage, chattering happily and he is greeted by the site of Nam Taehyun being hugged by Chaerin and an excited Dara right next to her, a bubbling laughter escapes the pair when they make eye contact with Seungyoon. They push him towards Seungyoon and Taehyun grins.

     "Hi babe," greets Taehyun.

     "Why didn't you stand in the crowd?" asks Seungyoon.

     "Nice to see you too," teases Taehyun, the sound of small feet causes him to turn his head.

     "Is that my princess?" asks Seungyoon.

     "Appa! Daddy brought me to watch you perform," says Seungyoon's little girl.

     "That's why you weren't out there," remarks Seungyoon.

     "I thought I'd surprise you with our baby girl," says Taehyun. Seungyoon smiles and brings Taehyun in for a one armed hug, little girl in the other. He feels completed.