Chan thinks he wasn't in the right state of mind then. Looking back, it's probably the worst decision he has ever made.

It starts out with him walking into the dance studio fifteen minutes before his dance club practice starts, completely carefree and unware of the imminent danger looming ahead of him.

At least until he spots Junhui and Minghao crouched at the corner, whispering among themselves fervently. That alone sets off warning bells in his head. There couldn’t be a more obvious sign to stay away. In spite of that, Chan couldn’t resist the overwhelming curiosity. He shuffles over tentatively and peers down.

“Whatcha doing?”

Their reaction is instantaneous. Heads whipping up simultaneously, their eyes widened comically as what seems to be a magazine disappears behind their backs within seconds, under a flurry of hands, only to visibly relax once they realise who it was.

Junhui yelps in relief, the sound reverberating throughout the empty studio, “Chan! Don’t sneak up on us like that!”

“We knew you’d be early so we got here way before the rest of the club did,” Minghao glances around as if he’s about to deliver top-secret information, then gestures him forward with a bony finger.

Right then and there, he should have turned tail and run. But because he's too curious for his own good, he goes to huddle close with them. His assumption is proven correct as Junhui brandishes a thin, seemingly innocuous magazine, embellished with Chinese letters. He flips to a particular page where little brightly coloured boxes filled with scribbles of more Chinese words, and a cartoon blushing teenage girl on the side greet Chan.

His first impression is that it looks like a teenage gossip magazine. And that's what he tells the other two when he looks up to find both of them gazing at him expectantly.

Junhui, like the sly fox he is, smoothly glides over the subject. “More importantly, remember how you were saying that there’s no way Soonyoung will ever reciprocate your feelings for him?”

Minghao points to the magazine at their feet and reports with excessive passion, “Well, we think we’ve found the perfect solution.”

Chan blanches.

He hasn’t exactly told anyone about his infatuation with their dance club leader and close friend, perfectly content with keeping this secret to himself. Minghao and Junhui, with their hawk eyes and eerily sharp intuitions, had seen right through him, because according to them, he had been shooting hearts out with his eyes. After confronting him, for some reason they both decided, with Chan being given no say in the matter, that they have the duty to help him out with his hopeless feelings.

This, however, is completely out of his expectations.

“…from a gossip magazine,” Chan reiterates slowly.

Without a shred of shame, Junhui nods solemnly, “An entirely reliable source.”

“It’s about how to win the girl –or in your case, guy– of your dreams,” Minghao adds.

His gaze moves from their faces to the magazine, then back to their faces. After determining they were completely serious, he throws his head back and laughs out loud. It slowly ebbs away to an awkward clear of his throat when Junhui and Minghao just raise their eyebrows at him.

“I’m not going to follow some stupid magazine,” Chan stresses, shaking his head. “Either way, I was planning to get all my feelings out and confess to Soonyoung by the end of the week. Maybe I should do it today—”

“NO!” Both Junhui and Minghao shout at the same time, instantly surging forward.

Chan gazes at them warily.

Junhui sidles up close, eyes wide and urgent, and exclaims with utter disbelief, “What are you thinking? You can’t do that! If he doesn’t like you, which there is a very high possibility of, that’ll only make things awkward. And we all sit together at the lunch table. We will die if we have to suffer with your awkwardness for the rest of the year!”

“Is this about you or me?” Chan’s jaw drops open, mortified.

“Boy should you be glad you found us first. We can guarantee you Soonyoung doesn’t like you. Yet,” Minghao puts out bluntly.

Chan winces. And honestly, he knows Soonyoung won’t like someone three years younger than him. He knows Soonyoung only sees him as a child. But having it shoved out right in his face makes it sting all the more.

So in a spur of weakness and desperateness, he agrees.

 

 

[display your masculinity]:

‘girls love a strong and dependable man’

 

He doesn’t even manage to carry this one out. Chan thinks it’s because it’s the first one and he was expected to do it on that very same day as when he found out the duo’s plan, so naturally, it was too rushed. Junhui thinks it’s because he .

Chan had grasped his chin and pondered very seriously, before coming to the very serious conclusion. “I could go to the gym and work out and-”

Before he can even get the sentence out, loud, hysterical shrieks of laughter punctuate the room, and the rest of his words trickle away to nothingness.

“Work out? You and work out?” Junhui roars as though it’s the most hilarious thing he has ever heard, slapping the wooden floor hard like there’s no tomorrow. A bolt of anger zips through Chan and it takes all his willpower to keep his composure.

“No offence, Chan, but you can’t, you just can’t,” Minghao guffaws uncharacteristically, wiping off a lone tear that escaped.

“That was exceptionally offensive. And are you done yet?” Chan snaps at Junhui, who has gone on to roll over on his side and is presently convulsing with high-pitched, barking laughter.

“Sorry, sorry,” he wheezes agonizingly.

“We were thinking along the lines of catching him when he falls or helping to lift heavy items and such,” Minghao explains with an uncanny kindness.

They come to the brilliant decision to give a demonstration. Chan doesn’t bother to question what goes through their minds anymore and just resigns himself to watching them.

Minghao pretends to trip and, like something straight out of romance novel, he falls face forward, only to land into Junhui’s arms, looking as if they had rehearsed it a million times. It’s too perfect Chan doesn’t know whether to be impressed or disgusted.

“Falling for me already?” Junhui coos in a saccharine voice, ending off with an exaggerated wink.

Okay, definitely disgusted. Chan stares at the scene before him, unamused.

“There’s no way in hell I’m saying that. Besides, you think Soonyoung would just happen to conveniently trip in front of me? Those things only happen in dramas.”

Junhui heaves Minghao back to standing position and declares proudly, “We’ll be the ones tripping and pushing him of course.”

Chan’s troubled expression only grows.

As if sensing he’s on the brink of backing out, Junhui continues expertly. “We are doing this for the greater good, Chan. Besides, just look at this face,” he crows, squishing Minghao’s cheeks between his palms. “No one would think he did it on purpose.”

“Now, come and practice,” Minghao says, indifferent to Chan’s inner turmoil. He’s pulled to his feet with no time to even think through it properly. Seeing how adamant both were being, he accepts his fate with a sigh and holds his arms out readily. What’s the harm in trying?

 

He was so very wrong.

 

The next moment happens too quickly for anyone to comprehend properly. As he had done so before, Minghao falls into his arms in what could have been a perfect catch.

Then, within a split second, Chan feels the full force of fifty-three kilogrammes of dead weight on him and his arms gives out. Minghao begins to slip through his grasp and realising something was amiss, basic human instincts kick in and he desperately latches onto Chan’s arm, lugging him downwards together and effectively causing both of them to crash onto the floor in a heap of tangled limbs and bodies.

Over the pain and haziness, the grating howls of laughter from Junhui reaches his ears once again, getting on his nerves like nails screeching on chalkboard.

“That went well,” he groans, pushing himself off Minghao, who had inadvertently gotten himself pinned underneath Chan, and becomes flustered for a second when he realises what this looks like.

 

 

 

“Uhm, am I interrupting something?”

 

Three heads immediately snap towards the entrance and pause in stunned silence. In his head, Chan curses all the gods he knows, and even those he doesn’t know, because why was the whole universe bent on making him suffer?

Soonyoung was at the doorway, duffel bag in one hand and looking questioningly at their compromising position. Mind you, he’s still atop Minghao. To make matters worse, he can see a whole crowd of students who have arrived for class behind Soonyoung.

“No!” Chan blurts, as both he and Minghao fight to get away from each other. From the corner of his eyes, he spots Junhui shaking with mirth, with no intention at all to help. At this point, he doesn’t care anymore.

Shaking his head bemusedly, Soonyoung barely takes another look at them and steps in. As though that was the indication that it’s safe to enter, the rest of the students start pouring in hesitantly, some still gawking. Chan feels his face burn.

“Looks like we have to scratch that off the list,” Minghao whispers discreetly as Junhui shoves the magazine in his bag.

“Yeah, I don’t think it’s going to work out,” Chan agrees regretfully.

“Not with your weak spaghetti arms, it won’t,” Junhui grins devilishly, jumping out of the way before Chan can punch him.

“It’s because he’s heavy!”

“I am literally the thinnest and lightest guy you know,” Minghao deadpans.

Just like that, the first method is deemed as a failure before he can even carry it out. It’s actually a shame, since it’s one of the better ones out of the rest, and that’s saying a lot.

 

 

[be cute]:

‘instil a desire in girls, to protect and care for you’

 

Chan swirls his spaghetti with his fork absent-mindedly, dread unfurling in his chest. He’s glad none of his other friends around the lunch table have questioned his silence, because then he’d have to come up with some excuse, and he’s a horrible liar. And also, Soonyoung (who’s sitting across him, thanks to Junhui who had forcefully pulled him down to that particular seat) would look at him with those worried eyes and he doesn’t think he can handle that.

He had protested against this method, of course, only to have them fall on deaf ears.

 

(“I can’t. I’m not made for being cute. I do not have a single cute gene in my DNA.”

Minghao promptly ignores him and continues advising him on how to be cute, like the professional he is.

“There’s really no point,” Chan tries again. “Soonyoung hyung already takes so much care of me. He literally smothers me with so much affection and hugs every time we’re together…” he rambles, blushing lightly at the thought.

Junhui stares at him in disgust.

“Do you know how much endurance and mental strength it takes for me to keep calm and maintain a poker face?!” Chan cries, shaking the other by the shoulders agitatedly.

Junhui just replies monotonously, “Yes, yes, that’s so sad.”)

 

So now, he’s stuck in this unfortunate predicament. Technically, he could just not do it, but knowing Junhui and Minghao, they definitely have something up their sleeves which would make things much, much worse. It’s better to stick to the plan.

A nudge to his feet under the table breaks him out of his reverie. He looks up blearily and finds both Junhui and Minghao eyeing him. The former glances pointedly at Soonyoung, wiggling his eyebrows. Chan groans internally, before finally accepting that he absolutely has to do this.

Taking a deep breath and pushing all rational thoughts to the back of his mind, he says in a sickeningly cutesy voice, “Soonyoung hyung~”

Beside him, Junhui chokes on his drink.

Soonyoung blinks. Chan continues before the regret and humiliation could fully kick in.

“Could I have some of your chicken? Just one piece,” he adds on and squishes his index finger against his cheek in what he hopes is a cute action, toes curling subconsciously.

Like the traitor he is, Minghao lowers his face so close to his plate while taking a bite of food, in order to presumably hide his embarrassment. The eyes of everyone on him and the silence around the table is stifling, but Chan keeps his eyes trained on Soonyoung, palms sweating slightly as the other just looks back perplexedly.

“Did you hit your head?” Jihoon asks without hesitation, voicing what everyone is thinking.

Chan slowly removes his hand from his cheek. He really doesn’t want to do this in front of everyone (eleven other friends, that’s a lot of people), but according to Minghao, lunch is the only time he has.

“Nope! I just really, really want some chicken!” He replies in a sing-song voice like a happy-go-lucky kid, however, his insides wither upon that action.

Though still confused, Soonyoung smiles. Not a mocking one, because he’s a saint, but a fond one. Chan releases a breath he didn’t know he was holding, relieved that the other isn’t repulsed.

“I don’t know what you’re playing at, but here,” he gives him not one, but three slices of chicken, and ruffles his hair, causing a fresh wave of heat to rise up his cheeks. Lucky for him, the rest of them just pass it off as one of his idiosyncrasies and go back to chatting.

By the time the embarrassment has gone away enough for his confidence to be replenished, lunch is over and everyone’s already standing up to go to class. It’s all too sudden and Chan becomes slightly desperate. Out of impulse (and probably madness), he hooks his arms around Soonyoung’s hastily.

“W…want to walk me to class?” He forces out the first thing that comes to mind in the best cute voice he can muster. Which is probably a mistake.

As soon as the words leave his lips, as though a dam has been broken, regret floods in, the black waters pooling in his heart. He gazes upwards at Soonyoung, mouth open, mirroring the other’s abashed expression, not believing what he just said.

“Uh,” Soonyoung utters.

Of course, his other friends don’t take it too well either. For the second time that day, silence envelopes them. Hansol’s giving his signature judgemental look.

“Chan, are you feeling okay?” Seungcheol asks, actually genuinely concerned.

Junhui and Minghao intervene in the nick of time (thank god for them, or he’d have combusted on the spot).

“Oh he’s totally fine,” Junhui assures heartily, and together with Minghao, helps to drag Chan away from a frazzled Soonyoung and out of the cafeteria.

 

(The kindness is short-lived. He gets his fair share of mockery from them later, as if him wallowing in self-pity and remorse isn’t enough.

“Want to walk me to class?” Junhui clings on to Minghao and bats his eyelashes pretentiously, while the latter snorts mercilessly.

Chan hangs his head low, completely distraught.)

 

 

[have a good sense of humour]:

‘girls love a guy who can make them laugh’

 

After an entire day of nursing his wounds, Chan returns to the lunch table the next day, rejuvenated and charged. He figures he might have a shot with this method. It’s a known fact that he isn’t funny in the least bit, and there’s no way he can even begin to compete with Seokmin or Seungkwan. So, as advised by the two Chinese friends, he had reviewed some jokes beforehand and picked out those that had gotten a laugh out of him.

Some might call it ‘lame’, but Soonyoung’s the epitome of lame jokes. That thought alone manages to reassure him.

“So, what do you call a deer with no eyes?”

Jihoon narrows his eyes viscously. “Do not even,” he growls threateningly.

“What?” Jisoo answers kindly.

“No idea!” Chan cheers.

Apart from Wonwoo’s cackles of approval, his only response is the stony looks around him. Wonwoo reaches over to give him a high-five, nose scrunching up as he sniggers.

“Sit down, Wonwoo,” Jeonghan scolds and pulls him down by the waistband of his pants. “That wasn’t funny.”

“Are you turning into Wonwoo now? Having one was hard enough,” Seungkwan groans while Seokmin shakes his head like a disappointed mentor.

Chan smiles in spite of himself and sits between Junhui and Minghao, all the more determined to make Soonyoung crack a smile.

“I thought you said you’d pick funny jokes,” Minghao mutters under his breath.

“You have a horrible sense of humour,” Junhui adds.

“Wonwoo liked it!”

“Wonwoo’s lame,” Mingyu informs him casually.

Nevertheless, Chan waits a few moments before asking the next question, refusing to back down. “Why is Peter Pan always flying?”

Most of the occupants at the table have chosen to ignore him.

“Because he neverlands,” he giggles nonetheless.

Jihoon massages his temples, while the others pretend to have not heard him. To his surprise, Soonyoung reaches across and pinches his left cheek lightly, amusement dancing in his eyes, though it’s more of someone looking at a clown, instead of actually finding a joke funny. Chan’s not satisfied, even if his breath stops short for a fleeting moment.

On the other hand, Wonwoo, his only ally, bursts out laughing. “That joke never gets old!”

There’s a transient ringing silence as the words take a while to sink in before Jihoon throws his hands in the air in defeat. “Oh my god.”

Chan and Wonwoo fist-bump each other.

His moment of high dies down soon enough when no one else laughs. Seeing as how Jihoon is visibly distressed, he swallows down his remaining jokes for the rest of the lunch.

 

 

Amazingly enough, his continuous failures don’t seem to dampen Junhui and Minghao’s spirits.

 

 

[show off your intelligence]:

‘girls love brainy men’

 

“Soonyoung…hyung!” Chan pants behind the other, bent over and resting his hands on his knees. His lungs are on fire from running all the way from the other end of school.

Soonyoung pats his back in concern and mild confusion.

“Sorry to keep you waiting, I literally just heard about this from Junhui and Minghao just now.”

There’s a slight pause before Soonyoung answers. “What do you mean? They told me you were the one who asked me to go home with you?”

Chan’s too busy trying to catch his breath that the words don’t process in his brain at first. When it does, he freezes as realisation finally dawns on him. His lips twitch upwards into a strained smile that’s more like a sneer.

“There seems to be some miscommunication. I’ll just go find Junhui and Minghao now,” he seethes, bristling like a cat that just had its tail stepped on, and turns around to go back the way he came from, already itching to curl his fingers around the other twos’ throats.

A hand on his wrist jerks him back.

“Hey, it’s okay. We haven’t done this in a long time anyway,” Soonyoung says casually with a toothy smile, eyes curving adorably.

Chan falters, feeling his heart melt. It’s funny how Soonyoung can make his anger vanish so easily with just a few simple words.

 

The ride home on the subway is mostly in comfortable silence, only broken occasionally by idle chat. They sit next to each other, thighs brushing together from time to time, sending a jolt of electricity through Chan. A shared piece of earphone dangles between them as their heads bob slightly to the music.

Chan knows he’s being stupid but he can’t help the way his throat and chest clog up with nostalgia. It hasn’t even been that long since they saw each other, but he misses this. Going home together, taking turns to listen to music from each other’s playlist, having a blast from making up eccentric choreography to the music they were listening to on the spot. Or just spending time with Soonyoung in general.

The older had been busier lately with club activities and studies, causing their daily travel home to be reduced to once in a few weeks. Naturally, Chan just gave up asking.

He was more than a bit pleased when he heard Soonyoung had asked him to go home together, well, until he realised this is all part of Junhui and Minghao’s scheme. Not that he’s complaining. If it hasn’t been for the two dancers, he would have probably made no progress at all, Chan admits to himself begrudgingly.

Chan knows many things about Soonyoung, but he’s being completely honest when he says he doesn’t know what kind of person Soonyoung likes.

He knows that they both share the same, fiery passion for dancing, he knows that Soonyoung’s kind, always looking out for others, especially those younger than him and would go to you in a heartbeat if he feels something is wrong, knows that he tries to involve everyone, making sure everyone in the team gets the time to shine when choreographing dances and that no one gets left out. He knows how Soonyoung loves to make people laugh and always tries his hardest to brighten up everyone’s moods.

He also knows that Soonyoung works too hard, when nights of limited sleep and hours put to perfect his and others’ dance moves takes a toll on him, and the strain in his eyes and dreary movements makes Chan’s heart ache. However, when he’s not tired or irritated, he’s smiling. Days when he returns to his usual enthusiastic self and cracks not-so-funny jokes and blinding smiles, lifts Chan’s spirits instantly.

Chan knows him so well that if asked, he could name his favourite things off the top of his head. Yet funnily enough, he doesn’t know his ‘type’. Perhaps that’s the reason why they’re going to such great lengths.

A vibration in his pocket alerts him of a message. Chan takes out his phone absent-mindedly, only to close the message hurriedly the next second, barely able to stop himself from tossing the device away. Making sure Soonyoung isn’t looking, he slowly opens the group chat again, turning the screen away ever so slightly.

'i hope ur spending ur time with soonyoung wisely', the first one from Jun says, with a wink. The next one from Minghao isn't much better: 'say sth smart for once pls'.

Struggling to control his facial expressions and not let his annoyance show, the grip on his phone tightens. He can already picture them with -eating grins behind their phones.

He’s not as bright as he’d like to be (Chan has already accepted this fact a long time ago). How on earth will he be able to seem more intelligent than someone who’s lived longer than him?

“Is that from Minghao?” Soonyoung speaks suddenly, pushing his face next to his to look at his phone. A seizure-like jerk ripples through Chan and he presses his phone to his chest to block the screen at lightning speed. Soonyoung turns to face him in confusion, face so close he can feel the other’s warm breath lightly on his cheek.

Upon seeing the shocked look on Chan’s face, Soonyoung moves back, a flash of hurt flitting across his face but it’s gone as soon as it came.

“Ah, sorry, I-”

“Don’t be!” Chan interrupts anxiously. “I mean I was just startled, that’s all. And yeah, it was from Minghao. He was just…uh…asking me this…very complex maths question.”

“But I’m in his class? Why doesn’t he just ask me?” Soonyoung points at himself, puzzled. “You haven’t even learnt any of that stuff yet.”

“Haha yeah, I guess I’m just kinda…smart?” Chan says with about as much confidence as someone about to jump into shark infested waters, scratching the back of his neck hesitantly and pocketing his phone before any more questions can be asked.

“Anyways, I have an important question,” he pulls out the earbuds from both their ears. Soonyoung perks up, vaguely intrigued.

Gazing into the other’s eyes, he reminds himself that this wasn’t the time for regrets and asks in one breath, “What is your take on the refugee crisis in Europe and America? Do you think first world countries are morally obligated to accept refugees? Or should they prioritise their own citizens first?”

Soonyoung gapes at him, bewildered. Chan doesn’t blame him. If it was up to him, he probably can’t even give a definite answer. He’d just suddenly recalled this question from an article he had read a few days back. Of course, other than the question itself, none of that content was retained in his memory.

“Uh…I guess they’re not obligated, but it would be good to accept them? They are in need of help after all. I’m sorry, why are we having this conversation?” he looks as clueless as Chan is feeling.

Chan chuckles unnaturally. “Oh, you know, just wanted to have an intellectual discussion with another intellectual individual. Since I’m intelligent and all. I’ve always been interested in…” he pauses. Is this politics?

“This kind of stuff,” he finishes lamely.

Snorting, Soonyoung leans back against his seat. “Have you been having enough sleep? You’ve been acting weird lately. Here, get some sleep. I’ll wake you when it’s your stop.”

Chan reluctantly lets him push his head down gently to rest on his left shoulder, while the other belatedly tells him to frankly just ask Jisoo who has more global awareness and knowledge than the both of them combined.

Trying to not feel so disappointed that Soonyoung had just brushed him off, Chan relaxes a bit, allowing the warmth on his side and the fingers running through his hair to lull him to sleep.

 

 

[flaunt your iness]:

‘girls can’t resist a y guy with a hot body’

 

Initially, they had been thoroughly revolted by the idea (“No way Chan, you’re like five-years-old!” “You’re light years away from having a hot body.”).

It isn’t until dance practice starts and the club members start having a dance battle that it clicks.

Chan snaps his fingers in epiphany and instructs Junhui and Minghao to get ready. If he thinks about it, it’s the simplest way. Who needs a hot body to be y? He’ll be y through his dance.

After all, dancing is his forte. Whenever he dances, the surroundings and the stares of the people disappear, and he gains a confidence he could never have normally. Naturally, that would be the best time to act.

The rest of the club had gathered in a circle and are cheering boisterously as people take to the dance floor, moving their bodies to a heavy hip-hop beat. Being the talented and popular dancer that he is, Chan doesn’t have to wait long before someone points him out to dance next.

As instructed, Minghao quickly changes the music to a slow, seductive one, with saxophones blaring in the background. And as though he’s about to show something absolutely terrible and unfit for human eyes, Junhui resorts to peeking through his fingers to watch.

Paying them no heed, Chan saunters to the centre, letting the music take over his body. He lets himself get lost, almost intoxicated, in the music and sways his hips sensually, garnering more whistles and cheers from the crowd. Adrenaline surges in his veins as he loses sight of his surroundings, and he does a couple more slow moves in accordance with the beat, involving a lot of lip-biting and body-rolling.

Over the heat and the hollers, everything passes in a blur and he can hardly remember the previous moves by the time he’s done, but he thinks he pulled it off quite well.

 

In the final move, he accidentally locks eyes with Soonyoung in the mirror.

His stomach lurches weirdly as he takes in Soonyoung’s widened eyes and slightly agape mouth. Under the yellowish light of the room, it almost looks as if he’s blushing.

Out of nowhere, a surge of confidence rises and he does something he knows he will definitely regret, before his brain can convince him otherwise.

 

 

 

He winks.

 

Before Soonyoung can react, he tears his gaze away forcefully to point to a random person in the room. The music switches to an upbeat pop music as someone else takes the spotlight.

Humming softly, Chan prances over to Junhui and Minghao, footsteps light and still breathless from the exhilaration. They welcome him with open arms, gleaming like proud fathers.

 

 

 

 

It’s to be expected, really, when they both find Chan with his head between his knees, not even five minutes later, questioning his life choices and wishing to jump off a building.

 

 

[being romantic and sweet]:

‘sweep girls off their feet’

 

“P…pick-up lines?”

Junhui nods his head and hands him a single red rose as though bestowing knighthood upon him. Apparently, they deemed the previous method as a success, leading them to the false belief that he’s on a roll.

But how do they expect him to just approach Soonyoung casually with a pick-up line, after the stunt he just pulled only a few moments ago? In fact, practice is still ongoing and they should be using this time to practice their dance moves instead of reciting pick-up lines.

“There’s no way he’ll like me,” he mumbles glumly. “He’d be better off with Seokmin hyung or something. They match so well with each other.”

He straightens up suddenly and uses his hands to gesture. “It’s like they’re two puzzle pieces, you see. They connect. Me and Soonyoung…we’re like two corner pieces. Meant to be at opposite ends and no matter how you force it, can’t ever fit. You know?” his hands drop limply to his sides.

“Hao, I think we’ve broken him,” Junhui comments.

“That wasn’t poetic at all, Chan,” Minghao says bluntly and without warning, pushes him towards Soonyoung with much more strength than his skinny arms should have.

There’s definitely no backing out now, as he stumbles into Soonyoung, who catches him by the arms to stabilise him.

“Hyung,” Chan says almost robotically.

Soonyoung raises an eyebrow questioningly, still holding on to his arms, his subtle touch burning his skin with fierce intensity. Pulling away, Chan stuffs the rose into the other’s palm in the most unromantic way possible.

“Just wanted to show this rose…how beautiful you are?” Why it ends up as more of a question, he doesn’t know.

If Soonyoung is shocked, he doesn’t show it and just continues to stare at Chan with an unreadable expression in his eyes. It’s as though his searing gaze can burn holes through Chan’s body while he searches his face for an explanation. Feeling exposed under the intense look, Chan chokes out a quick ‘bye’ before scurrying back to the safety of the Chinese members, his face hot.

 

 

----------

 

This is wrong, all wrong.

After practice ended, Chan had let down his guard too soon, only to be shoved roughly towards Soonyoung, once again (those monsters. Chan’s starting to believe they’re the spawns of the devil) and be forced to splutter out some ridiculous, flirty line (Was that an earthquake? Or did you just rock my world?).

Rather than getting swept off his feet, his reaction is the exact opposite. The moment the ends of Soonyoung’s lips curve down noticeably, Chan’s heart plummets, immediately sensing that he’d said something wrong.

So when Soonyoung speaks in the coldest voice Chan has ever heard him say, he’s left stumped and a loss for what to do.

 

 

 

“You’re just messing with me, aren’t you?”

 

 

“I—”

“I mean, don’t think I haven’t noticed this weird thing you’ve got going on with Junhui and Minghao,” Soonyoung lets out a resigned chuckle, the usual shine in his eyes replaced by a dark and heavy emptiness. Chan feels as though he’s staring into two abysses.

“You’ve been acting weird this whole week, and especially around me. I don’t know what the reason is, but haven’t you been making enough fun of me?”

Soonyoung definitely isn’t shouting at him, but the air crackles with thick tension all the same. Instead, he spoke softly, disappointment and hurt palpable in his voice, which is probably a hundred times worse than a scolding. Each word he spoke is like a punch to the gut, leaving him struggling for breath and the words to make this, make everything better.

Face blank and tiredness swimming in his eyes, Soonyoung pushes past Chan to leave the room.

Chan stays rooted to the spot, staring at the space where Soonyoung had just been moments before, the numbing ache in his heart suffocating him.

Junhui and Minghao emerge from behind a wall, and tread carefully over to him, approaching him as though he’s a ticking time bomb about to explode. The sympathetic expressions on their faces are enough for him to know they had seen the whole exchange.

“I’m a horrible person. I deserve to just jump into a ditch and die,” Chan murmurs softly, trudging away.

Junhui does a double take. “What? No, that’s the wrong reaction to have!”

“We’re really sorry, Chan,” Minghao’s voice was barely above a whisper.

Chan shakes his head weakly. “He…he hates me now,” his throat constricts uncomfortably. If he continues talking anymore, he’d just start bawling. So he turns around and walks away quickly because if anything, he doesn’t deserve to cry.

 

(But he still cries anyway.)

 

 

----------

 

They meet again in a deserted hallway and they both just freeze in their footsteps, staring at each other, unsure what to do.

Eventually, Soonyoung opens his mouth to say something but Chan beats him to it.

 

“I wasn’t making fun of you. I just really like you, as more than a friend.”

Soonyoung’s eyes go round. Seeing as how he’s about to speak again, Chan moves closer in a few strides and slaps his hand over the taller’s mouth.

“No, listen. When you just dump all those affections on me, it makes me all fuzzy and stuff inside. I know you don’t like me, but when you do all those things, I just feel really special so you can’t blame me for liking you,” Chan glares at him as though it’s all his fault.

This is probably the least romantic confession ever. He had, at some point, planned out to say something so utterly heart-warming and nauseatingly sweet and befitting of a Shakespeare play. Instead, he’s garbling out the whole story and rambling how Junhui and Minghao had persuaded him to follow their utterly unhelpful magazine.

“So I know it was really stupid of me to follow their ideas and I’m sorry for not considering your feelings. After you reject me, I would appreciate it if you wouldn’t hate me and just let me run home so I can blast Billie Jean in my room and cry over some ice cream,” Chan grits out firmly, despite getting a little teary-eyed.

On the contrary, Chan feels Soonyoung’s lips morph into a smile against his palm.

 

It’s his turn to be confused. Soonyoung isn’t supposed to be smiling. Unless…

He retracts his hand in horror. It’s even worse than he had hoped. Soonyoung’s going to laugh at him, then leave him crushed and broken on the floor for everyone to gawk at. He wonders if it’s too late to say he was just kidding.

The next words that leave Soonyoung’s mouth, though, were completely out of his expectations.

 

 

 

“Who said I was going to reject you?”

 

 

“Uh…what?”

 

 

“I like you too.”

 

 

“What?”

 

 

“That’s why I display so much affection with you. Didn’t you know?”

 

 

“Wait, what?”

 

Soonyoung laughs, airy and bright, and encircles his arms around Chan’s waist, tugging him closer for a loose hug. Chan stumbles slightly, mind still reeling from the suddenness of everything.

“But then,” Soonyoung says again from beside his ear. “All those things you did yesterday during practice made me so flustered and happy and also confused at the same time. So I felt like you were playing with my feelings, and then I just got angry-”

“Hold on,” Chan cuts in, wriggling out of the embrace so he can see him properly.

“You mean that magazine actually worked?” he asks incredulously.

Rolling his eyes, he flicks Chan’s forehead fondly. “Don’t get full of yourself.”

Grin creeping up his face, Chan slides his hand into Soonyoung’s and clasps their fingers together. “So…this means we’re dating right?

Soonyoung only chuckles lightly and lets him be dragged by the younger, who’s practically bouncing with joy. He couldn’t wait to tell Junhui and Minghao. And maybe also burn the magazine. He should have just confessed in the first place.

 

 

----------

 

“Why didn’t you ever tell me you liked me?” Chan pipes up suddenly, after having the random thought pop up during lunch.

Soonyoung answers simply through a mouthful of rice. “I tried gauging your reaction whenever I’m with you but you never seem affected so I just assumed you didn’t share the same feeling.”

“Curse my perfect acting skills.”

“So let me get this straight," Seungkwan clicks his tongue and turns to Junhui and Minghao with an underlying hint of sassiness. "You both were able to find out that Chan likes Soonyoung when none of us could, yet you couldn't even figure out Soonyoung likes Chan too? And I thought Chan was the only dense idiot."

“Literally, the whole table knows that. And we all figured it out on our own,” Hansol supplies. The rest nod affirmatively.

“Like he was so obvious?” Seokmin looks genuinely confused.

"Like there was so much love in his eyes whenever he looks at Chan?" Jisoo adds.

“This whole time, I thought you both knew,” Mingyu purses his lips disappointedly.

Junhui and Minghao just splutter defensively.

Jeonghan turns to Chan. “Out of everyone, you had to get help from the two people who were as clueless as you?”

“It would have saved you all that drama and me all that headache from your nonsense,” Jihoon grumbles, stabbing his food brutally with his fork.

Chan shuffles closer to Soonyoung for comfort.

In response, Soonyoung wraps an arm around his shoulder. “Come on guys, without them, we would have never have had this happy ending.”

Jihoon looks ready to slam his head onto the table.

As if to prove his point, Soonyoung tilts his head slightly to press a chaste, feather-like kiss on Chan’s lips. And though he has dreamed about this moment countless times, nothing beats the real thing. Even with everyone’s groans in the background, it couldn’t have been better.