“Ha……” Sehun exclaimed a heavy sigh as he followed his hyungs around Myeongdong. They were all excited to be out in the bustling crowd on a Saturday evening. Usually they’d just hang at one of their houses but they liked to go out once in a while. Key point, they. Sehun did not. If he could avoid other human beings, he would whereas the others did not mind. He always found it strange as to how they have become such good friends. And even though he is not the type to say it aloud, he was always thankful that they reached out to him. 

He had finally fallen asleep at 12pm after the hangout with Ara after just lying an hour in bed thinking about it to only wake up at 3pm when the others ambushed his much needed sleep. After dragging him out of the house, they were finally grabbing a bite to eat along the busy streets of Myeongdong. And being a bunch of handsome, young men, they were definitely grabbing a lot of female attention.

“Yah, isn’t that Minhyun and Jaejoon?” They all turned to where Suho was pointing and sure enough, in the sea of people were two tall chopsticks.

Sehun’s eyes, as if anticipating, searched around them and found a short girl. He watched as she grinned ed and pointed excitedly to just about everything she saw as they both walked on either side of her. No doubt they were also grabbing a bunch of attention from others walking by and Sehun was no exception.

As if they had not hung out the night before, they greeted each other eagerly, deciding to hang out together. Ara gave an equally wide smile to Sehun as he exchanged the same.

“Hey.”

“Hey again.” 

Somehow they ended up behind the whole group the whole afternoon just following along and talking a little. They knew they were both sleep deprived but somehow surviving this hectic moment. Sehun did not want to admit it, but meeting them, rather just Ara, made his friends dragging him out here after only a three hour sleep, just maybe, worth it. These days, he had found himself looking for her more often and he did not like that. He has never been interested in anyone his whole life but something about her draws him in.

Maybe it was her voluminous silky black hair; her big almond shaped eyes that were black but when shone, was slightly greyish and sparkling with such brightness; or her smooth dewy skin that never seemed to have makeup because she didn’t need it; or the smiles of her rosy soft looking lips that curled at the ends.

And although she dressed normally, she somehow made any top and jeans look good because she was naturally healthy, never worrying about diets like many females in the country. 

She was just Ara; beautifully independent.

Kai watched as Sehun gaze at Ara in a look he has never seen but very much glad to welcome. It was very obvious to him that the younger boy had taken a liking to the girl, but not yet love. He had caught the boy gazing at her a couple times at school; this was before the two even met formerly with the group project.

He could see that Sehun hoped something would come out of this, especially after the group project, but knowing Sehun, that boy did not know how to handle girls. Being an infamous playboy himself, although never exceeding casual makeout sessions, he definitely knew how to please girls. But that was in the past, he has finally encountered someone, despite that particular girl being stubborn and playing hard to get, never falling for his tricks. 

Either way, he knew Sehun needed a little push because at this point, the latter would end up with a restraining order from all the staring. The younger boy was an only child living with his father who was never home most of the time but tried to be the best father that he could in his position. And so, Sehun was always quiet and introverted; hated socialising and liked to stick with himself. Even though he had a cold presence, that was just how he looked, causing misunderstandings all the time. 

Yet Ara seemed to look past his cold exterior and was always equally friendly. Kai assumed that was why the younger boy was so attracted; the fact that unlike the girls who were into Sehun for his ‘bad boy’ look or that he was next in line for his father’s company, she just treated him like any other student. She was just as introverted as Sehun was but was still able to be equally friendly to everyone but somehow creating a wall that everyone acknowledged. And this wall was preventing Sehun from approaching her and it was frustrating the older boy. 

Kai nudged the younger boy who diverted his attention to the former, “Make it count.” He said as he nodded his head towards the girl who was looking through some earrings at a stand before giving him an encouraging smile and walking off; distracting the others by suggesting a competition at the arcades. Sehun watched in disbelief as they all scurried off through the crowd before they were gone. 

“Pretty,” Ara smiled holding up a pair of earrings; dangling long silver chains that carried small, white valerian flowers. “And expensive.” her eyes widened at the price but before she could place it back, a hand had grabbed it and already handing to the saleslady.

“Yah,” She didn’t mean to sound rude, but Ara was starting to get irritated with this boy who was purchasing things she could pay for herself. She did not like how he kept waving around his card as if saying don’t worry, you have me. They weren’t close and yet here he was tapping his card for her, the second time today. “What are you doing?” she watched as he shrugged and handed her the bag as he walked off.

“No need to get angry at him, he just cares about you,” She turned to the saleslady who gave her an assuring smile, “you two make a cute couple.”

Before Ara could deny her claim, Sehun had gripped her wrist and was dragging her away saying, “Thank you, hope you sell lots.”

Ara wriggled her wrist to signal that she was willing to walk voluntarily. “I could have bought that myself, now I owe you and I wasn’t even going to buy.”

“But you didn’t,”

“Because it was expensive.”

“But it was handmade and in a society where name brands dominate, we could maybe help indie brands a little.”

Ara was astonished; he had a point and she couldn’t deny it. This rich boy who lived in a massive mansion, wore designer clothes and drove expensive cars was explaining the importance of helping those lower. Sure she knew it was wrong to be prejudice but sometimes you assume because it was instinct even if reasoning would always contradict that assumption.

She smiled at the bag containing the pair of earrings before taking hold of his arm and dragging him to a bubble (boba if you’re non-Australian) tea shop. She wanted to pay him back with something to say thanks and everyone liked bubble tea; even if maybe they never craved for it but would drink if it were there. “Hi, can I get one large milk tea with lychee jelly, no pearls, and less sugar.” She looked towards Sehun who gave in his order of chocolate bubble , and then paying once the order was taken. 

They sat at a window seat as they waited for their drinks. “No pearls?” He gave her a weird look, almost judging her. He loved bubble tea and could not be more delighted to get free bubble tea but the girl had ordered no pearls. No, it was not causing him to like her any less but he just found it strange since the point of bubble tea was the pearls in the milk tea that looked like bubbles.

Ara shrugged as she gave a disgusted face, “Pearls don’t taste like anything and have a weird texture.” 

They spent the whole evening together and Ara never questioned where the others were. Every now and then she would hook arms with him, a habit from doing so with Minhyun and Jaejoon; this caused Sehun to attempt to stay calm. Sehun rarely took photos but somehow Ara had convinced him to  go in the photo booths, both leaving with two columns of photos each. Anyone who saw them would have thought they were together.

He was glad she was having fun but also thankful she was putting up with his mostly stone face. He honestly never hung out with a female before today. Was this a date or a casual hangout with a supposed friend? He was confused but nonetheless liked this… whatever it was.

And so did she. Although she had only ever been friends with the two chopsticks, something was different about this. It didn’t seem like friends hanging out; she didn’t want it to be friends hanging out if she was going to be honest. Even if he was the emotionless rich boy, he did not seem nonchalant or demanding when with her. He somehow made her feel protected; feel shy; feel self-conscious. But he also made her feel vulnerable, because she knew that her heart was doing its own thing again. She knew from her shy smiles that she was falling for him. The way he smiled to her when he was known for not giving any emotion; the way he’d walk on the side closest to the road; or when he’d buy her things she’d prevent herself from buying because they were unnecessary.

The small little things made her stomach all fluttery and uneasy. She wasn’t used to this, or so, she has never experienced this. For once in her life, as someone who was always independent, introverted and competent in herself, she felt vulnerable and wanting to depend on him for he made her feel protected.

There was no doubt that she was not feeling that great this past week. And with all the blue devils living inside her, she felt like he might be the one to protect her from them. In a spur of a week, he had somehow broken down the mask she was putting up to make everyone believe she was okay, and so successfully. Maybe it was because she was so vulnerable this past week, that his unfamiliar kind gestures attracted her.

All she knew was that she didn’t want to listen to the blue devils anymore; she just wanted out, and crying all night was not going to help her anymore. Maybe whatever was out there had sent him to help her fight; help her find a will to live.

Because right now, she was just staying in school for the sake of it and hoping that the next day would be better; in a world where the blue devils wouldn’t control her as much as it did. In hopes that maybe her mentally wouldn’t be as weak as it was. The thought had always made her scoff; at how she could so weak and easily controlled but somehow still be strong and deceiving as to trick everyone around her.

Ara’s mind and brain are two separate entities yet here was Sehun, oblivious just like the rest of them. At this point, did she even like him or was it the blue devils trying to get her to go through an unrequited relationship only to fall back into the dark?

All in all, she just wanted to live as one; as Jung Ara. Just herself.

 

---

 

*written* 21.10.2019

Author's Note: Kept it short and bittersweet :3

Sometimes too much dialogue does not do justice ~ n