It was 10:30pm. The girl laid in bed staring at her phone. Today marks the two years she has been with her boyfriend. Unfortunately the night before the pair got into a big fight and she spent the night crying while her boyfriend watched his tv show. It was over something stupid and she wished she wasn’t so petty. Her boyfriend hasn’t texted her back all day. “Happy two years babe and many more!” she read the text out loud before sending. Just last week he called her the love of his life. “I love you and only you.” He said to her making the girl smile. “Do you really?” She asked him “Of course. I love you so much. I love you more than myself. You are the love of my life.” She blushed and he kissed her forehead. Now she is in bed on the verge of tears. That day onward he been so distant and she would ask him “Baby, are you okay?” “Yeah.” he replied “You sure?” “God you are so annoying.” He lashed out on her “I’m a grown man. I can take care of myself.” Her eyes widen “Sorry.”

It was always her apologizing. She had have thoughts about breaking up with him but she didn’t have the guts to do it. She was too in love with him. He had done some things that made her question their relationship but then she blames everything upon herself. That she is overreacting, she is getting paranoid for nothing and she needs to trust him more. He spent more time on the phone talking and texting other girls. He had other girls as his lockscreen. He and his friends would rate girls. She clutches the phone close to her chest and choked on her sobs. She loves him so much, so much that it hurts. Why out of all guys she fell in love with him. They have broken up before. All because of his friends not liking her. They told him to leave her, he listened. He did this a week before her birthday. 3 months later she took him back because she couldn't bring it upon herself to hate him. She hated how she couldn't hate him.

10:50PM. No text back. She texted her friends and they truthfully didn’t like him. But they reassured their friend that everything will be alright and he does love her. She felt sick to her stomach. She didn’t want to lose him. 10:53pm. “Hey can we talk?” He texted her. Instantly she texted back with “Of course baby. What is it?” She chewed on her bottom lip. Nervous about what he was going to say back. She saw him typing. She had a feeling but didn’t want to trust that feeling. “I don’t love you anymore.” She started to cry. She felt pathetic. She felt as if this was all a joke. All the “i love you” “you’re my one and only.” and everything that he said and done wasn’t true. Wasn’t real. “Are you serious?” She typed and he typed and she waited, tears still running down her face. “I’m serious. It’s over. I don’t love you anymore. The feelings had faded.” She looked at the message over and over “What about all those promises?” She waited for a reply and he said “They mean nothing to me now. It’s over. There is no us. No future.” She tried to call him “I CAN’T CALL NOW.” He texted her “I love you.” she texted him “I know.” was his reply “I will always love you.” again his reply was “I know.”

11:20PM. She was hurt. He wanted to remain friends. But she knew it would only hurt her more if she saw the love of her life fall for someone else, but she agreed. He promised her that he would always be there for her. He promised her that they would have a future. They would get marry and have a daughter together. He promised her they would be together forever. He promised her that he would never hurt her. He broke them all. They meant nothing to her. She didn’t deserve this. She deleted everything that reminded her of him. She read his love letters and she felt the tears come in again but she them up and ripped the letters up. She knew things would get better because this wasn’t the first time. She knew that it would take a long time to get over her first love. The guy she thought for sure was her forever.

She deleted all of her social media knowing that people will start to ask questions. She felt as if it was best to stay away from social media. She didn’t need to know what was everyone’s thoughts on the situation. She didn’t need to know how he was doing. They weren’t together. She didn’t want to be friends. She blocked him. She reminded herself that she is a strong girl. She will be okay. She will get through this. Her friends all sent her texts about how much a jerk he is.

1AM. She was empty. She stared at her the wall. Her phone on silent. Her eyes were red and puffy. She felt as if the world was unfair. They were the cutest couple. Nobody knew what happened just between them. They judged based on what they see. She was afraid to go outside. She knew people would give her sympathy looks. She was afraid to see him. She felt played. He did this to her twice. She felt stupid. If the roles were reversed and she did that to him. She would be labeled as a heartless . In any situation he wasn’t guilty. Everything was on her. When he played her the first time, everyone warned her not to go back to him. When she told them that she gave him a second chance they all judge her.

He on the other hand was praised for convincing her to give him another chance. He was praised for getting a girl like her. He was praised all the time. Never criticized. The people judge based on what they see and hear. They don’t know the truth. They had no idea what she been through. They had no idea how much this guy had an affect on her. They had no idea about how much she cried herself to sleep.

1:12AM. She was tired. But she couldn’t sleep. She closed her eyes and all she could see was him. She knew that this was only for the best. She knew that him leaving her was only for the best. But she was still in love with him. She felt worthless. She felt as if she wasn’t good enough. She started to pick out her flaws. Reasons to why he broke up with her. Why he no longer loved her.

1:45AM. She was angry. She came to the conclusion that he never loved her. The two years they spent together was all a game to him. She was lied to. She was in her own little world. She felt like everything was perfect with him. Little did she know he didn’t feel the same way. She was convinced that he never loved or care for her. She screamed into her pillow. She felt the tears come back.

2:00AM. She was devastated. The tears just wouldn't stop. Her breathing was irregular. She cried for him. “Please, anyone help me. Please take my pain away.” she begged but no matter how much she pleaded for help, the pain got worse every time. All she could see was him. All the “I love you” replayed in her head. All the kisses. All the hugs. All the sweet words. All the admiring. Everything.

2:10AM. She was heartbroken. But what could she do about it? Nothing.