It wasn't supposed to be like this.

No.

This was not what he imagined. Not what he imagined at all. He wanted to shout,to scream,to do something but all he could do was sit on his sofa,dazed. He didn't think she would come to haunt him again. Not after all he had done to get as far away from her as possible. But she did. Of course, that was foolish of him to think so. She always knew where to find him. Always.

In his hands was a proof of his mistakes. His regrets.

A wedding invitation. 

And it read...

                                       The Honour Of Your Presence Is Requested
                                                      At The Marriage Of
  
                                                           Park Eun a

                                                                 And
 
                                                         Ji Chang Wook
                                                   
                                       This Celebration Of Love Is To Be Held On 
                                                               Sunday
                                                 The 25th of December,2016
                                                At 10 O'clock In The Morning
                                                             XX Church    

Saying he was upset would be the understatement of the year.

His feelings were a mixture of regret, anger and sorrow.

Regret because he truly regretted not telling the love of his life his true feelings.

Anger because he was angry at himself for being such a coward.  

And sorrow because all he can think about are the what ifs had he actually confessed his love to her.
Would his name be on that invitation card or would it just make the date of the wedding earlier
He doesn't know. But what he did know was that he was going to have to face her sooner or later.

So why not now. Why not when she was expecting him. 

He wants to come back, to see his parents,his friends,to see her. But he's scared. Scared they'll shun him, scared they'll curse at him. He doesn't think that "I left because my love was unrequited and I thought that if stayed away long enough my heart could heal"was a good enough reason but it was what he did. And he would never lie to them if they asked, if she asked.

Perhaps with this invitation, he could finally get a sense of closure.

He goes to bed feeling emotionally exhausted
                      
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Today was the wedding.

He felt sick. He can't tell if it's because he was scared or because of his heart problems.

Probably both. 

It was weird coming back to his hometown. Everything looked the same yet felt so different.But he guessed it was to be expected, after all, he hadn't come here for 6 years. He felt butterflies in his stomach. He looked around. He was still in his car. He could turn the keys,get the engines revved up and leave. And go back home to his big and empty apartment in the big city. 

But he didn't. 

He wanted to see her. See how time had changed her, for better or for worse. He wanted to see her smile that could rival the sun at its peak. No. Even the sun was shadowed when she was happy. At least to him. And a wedding is supposed to be a girl's most happiest moment, right? So he's curious how bright her smile would be.
Even if that smile wasn't directed at him.

His car felt stuffy. so he went out.

He breathed in the fresh air. Its been quite a long time since he breathed in such fresh air. The city's air was mostly polluted. 

"Jeon Jung kook?"

Hearing a voice from behind snaps him out of his stupor.

It was Kim Taehyung, His old classmate.

"Waaah, I didn't think I'd see you here dude. How have you been?" He reaches out for a handshake.

"Ouhh um. I'm fine. Thanks" He shakes Taehyung's hand. Taehyung pulls him into an embrace.

"You okay? You look kind of pale" Taehyung asks after he lets him out of his embrace. His tone was filled with worry.

"Peachy" 

Taehyung didn't seem convinced at his answer but decided to let it go for now. While he was touched that Taehyung was worried about him, he felt a bit awkward talking to him. Perhaps he should have stayed at home.
However, before he could say anything else, Taehyung was already dragging him towards a group of five men, arguing what song to sing.

"Guys, you won't believe who I found"

"Taehyung, If this is one of your alien spo- J-Jeon Jungkook?"

"Um...Hi?"

He was then caught in group hug. He felt tears b his eyes. It seems they missed him too.

After a while, they finally let him out of their grasp.

They all had grins donned on their face that made Jung kook feel even more guilty.

"Jungkookie" Seok jin hyung or jin hyung as Jungkook used to call him, called him out. He gestured Jungkook to follow him. The other were a bit disgruntled but they let jin do what he wanted.

Jungkook follows jin into another area.

Suddenly Jungkook feels that his shoes were the most interesting thing in the world. 

They sat there in complete silence until jin decided to break the ice.

"So how have you been, truthfully?"

After long years of loneliness, he decides to confide in his trusted hyung.

"Honestly? I just feel terrible."

Jin hums as if saying continue.

"I-I didn't think I would actually come here but... here I am." he says nervously

"......"

"......"

"This place is really nice don't you think?"

A bit surprised at the question, he gave the church a thorough look. With red and blue decorations on the 
church's pearly white, walls it was definitely a sight to behold. You'd think red and blue would clash but somehow they fit so well together. Perhaps it was a sentiment to the couple.

"Yeah...."

"Do you want to go meet her? there's still time before the wedding starts"

Does he? Does he really want to meet her? no, not really but he has to.

"I don't know..... I mean it's her special day, I don't wanna ruin it for her"

"Nonsense, she'll be ecstatic to see you"

"I... If you say so"

Jin led him into a different area of the church. He could feel the stares he got. They probably thought they saw a ghost behind Jin with how pale he was from nervousness.

As they came in front of a door, he stopped.

This was it, the moment he wanted yet dreaded the most. The moment that could possibly crash and burn his entire being. Ok, perhaps he was being a bit dramatic but his nerves were starting to go insane. He could imagine everything going wrong. Euna could possibly slap him or shun him but remembering his old group of friends who welcomed him with open arms made him feel hope. Then again, his love was known for being able to hold a nasty grudge for a long time. He hopes that she won't resent him, hopes that she'll instead welcome him back with a kiss but that's just wishful thinking.

"Are you ready?"

Not really.

"Yeah.."

He closes his eyes.

"Euna, I have a surprise for you."

"Oh! Jin wha- Jeon Jung kook? Is that really you?"

It's weird, did she not know he would come? She did send him an invitation. Perhaps she didn't expect him to come.

He opens his eyes and feels mesmerised. He wishes he was some sort of poet to describe how beautiful she was. But he wasn't. So he decided to say she was beautiful in her white and glittery wedding dress that fit her so well.

"Umm he-" He tried to greet but was instead engulf inside a bear hug. His worries were all but nought. He hears the door being closed.

Being in her embrace made him feel like a zoo was trampling his stomach. Her embrace was the warmest thing he ever felt in those six lonely and cold years. His heart was not taking this well. He felt as if everything had slowed down. 

As if there was only him and her.

"I-I missed you." He said timidly, he could feel his eyes stinging.

"You idiot! Where have you been...." He could feel how upset she was at him for leaving.

"You didn't even say goodbye" He feels guilty.

"I'm sorry..." And he truly was sorry for leaving so abruptly. Without telling her.

She punched his chest.

"Sorry's not gonna cut it, you hear me" Even when she was angry, she looked so beautiful. "You're gonna have to make up for it" She pouted.

He felt himself give out a small chuckle. He forgot how relaxing it was to be with her. How nice it felt to just stand near her. Have her attention all on him. His heart started to throb.

"Okay" 

"You're gonna be in town for awhile, I hope, cause we're gonna have to catch up"

"Sure" He felt his lips starting to turn upright.
 
He didn't really intend to stay overnight but if she wishes for it, he'll do it with no doubt. It's been so long since he has ever smiled this hard. And it was all thanks to her.

Her frown then turned upside down.

 

"I missed you too"

 

There it was again that wonderful feeling of being loved, even if it was a different kind of love than what he wanted.

There was a knock on the door.

They both turn towards it. Jin's head peeked in.

"Euna, It's time"

It's finally time for her wedding. His heart felt heavy.

"Jungkook, you'll be there right?" He hears hope in her voice.

He didn't really want to but he could never say no to her. Never.

"Of course" His smile felt tight.

He turns around and leaves the room. He heads toward the wedding hall.

Jin waves his hand at him at the back of the hall. Jungkook reluctantly heads toward him.

"So how do you feel"

"I-i'm happy for her" His heart was throbbing again.

Jin looks at him with an unreadable look.

Not wanting to say anything anymore, he sits in the back row.

The wedding starts and everyone could see how nervous the groom was.

And then the bride comes in, looking even more beautiful than before.

He sees the groom looking at her as if stunned, mesmerised.

She strides toward the altar. The two share a meaningful gaze.

The love within the gaze crushes his heart.

He wishes it was him. And lets the tears run freely down his face as the couple kiss to finalise their marriage.

Everybody claps except him.

 

She looks happy.

 

His heart felt tight.

His gaze meets hers and she smiles.

He loves her so much that he lets her be happy, even if it was killing him.

 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hiiiii, it's me your author. Sorry if this wasn't very good.I tried my best.

This was my very first fanfic.please give constructive criticism so i can better my writing skills.