Joongki didn't have a high alcohol tolerance. One bottle of the traditional Soju would make him started smiling bashfully at everyone's direction. Add another bottle and he would bawled without any care of the world, crying and spilling his stories to his companion. Downed more glasses into his stomach and he'd drop dead unconscious on the ground.

Beer was an easier option for him. Served him four or five cans of the beverage, and he would still be able to sit straight in his seat. But, six was a bit dangerous number, because by then, he'd be too honest for his own good.

People around him were well aware of this information, especially the closest one, less likely the ones who only knew him casually, or his new work colleagues.

It was one of the reason why he and Insung kept Kwangsoo with them whenever they went drinking. He was not someone with a small self control, but there were times when their conversation got too long and deep, and they got carried away. Then, by the end of the night, he was wailing alone in the private room they had booked, while the older man sneaked out to pay for the bill and disappeared into the dark night.

Lee Kwangsoo was needed, always, or most of the time, though rarely appreciated.

But, Kwangsoo was not there tonight, and Ah In was too absorbed in having his own fun to keep a track on the number of the cans he had opened.

And something was tugging at the edge of his heart. It poked him, pulled the long hidden desire inside his being and finally pushed him to raise from the chair he was sitting, with a staggered steps leaving the building and stopping a cab.

.

The sound of the bell from the front door twitched  her awake from the sleep she was about to get. It probably had not been five minutes since she climbed her bed and closed her eyes. The glowing digital clock on her side table showed the number 23:14.

She wondered, as she got up and left her king sized bed, if her parents left something behind that made them drove back.

When she was about to open the door, she thought it was a bit strange for her mother of father to press the bell. They knew her security code, they could typed it in. In fact, they were the type of people who would just sneak in secretly without having to wake her up.

She still opened the door though. 

A sigh escaped .

Of course it was strange; he was not her parent.

The man in front of her was smiling in a goofy way. That alone told her that he was not in his right mind.

He was absolutely not in his right mind, or else, he would never appeared on her doorstep at this hour.

"Chaewon-ah!"

It only took him two steps forward to close their distance and flung his arms around her.

She closed her eyes, inhaling a breath.

His too cheery tone of talking was another evidence. And finally, the smell of alcohol coming out of his breath as he talked into her hair.

"Oppa, you're drunk."

She talked, stating, needing no question and answer.

He was not completely wasted. He held himself steadily, maybe a little bit swaying steps here and there as she ushered him to get inside before someone spotted them.

"No, no, I'm not drunk."

Several plans and options were composed inside her mind as he kept repeating the stupid denial. She could send him back on her own, or she could call a cab, or his manager, or Kwangsoo. Or she could let him stayed the night in her small livingroom.

"Wait here," she said, sitting him down on the caramel couch. First of all, she needed to get him a warm water to help him sober up a bit.

But his fingers were clinging onto the sleeve of her pajamas.

She raised an eyebrow, a gesture he couldn't notice clearly in his state of condition.

"Chaewon-ah, do you like him too?"

He sounded like a child at the moment, who was upset at something. A sober Song Joongki would rather kill himself than having to produce such sound.

"You can't," he continued, "don't be with him, don't go with him."

At this point, she realized what he was talking about, and who he was talking about. She didn't know where he got the information, maybe one of her friends, or maybe one of that guy's friends. The entertainment industry could be big but also small at the same time to keep a secret from going around.

Chaewon stared back at the foggy eyes that seemed struggling to be kept awake but still tried to be focused on her. The night was high and the fine hairs around his mouth and jaw were showing up.

He was getting old, they were getting old. Long had gone that baby fat he used to have on his cheeks when they first met each other.

They had been playing this pretense game for years.

Pretending like he didn't regard her more than a co-worker and good friend.

Pretending like she was alright with everything they had.

Pretending like they didn't notice each of their own feelings.

She let another intake of breath filled her lung.

She was always a hesitant person. She never really had a full self confidence. And she got worse when it came to him.

His mono-lids flickered, blinking sleepily. The hold of his fingers on the fabric of her clothes was getting loose.

"Why?" she asked one last time, mustering her guts before he left her to the dreamland. "Why can't I be with him?"

The light on his eyes turned dim. Maybe she was mistaken, or maybe it was real. He looked hurt.

"I love you, I thought you know that. You shouldn't be with him. You should be with me. Haven't I been waiting for so long?"

Joongki collapsed to the couch.

.

She took off his socks and coat for him and brought a blanket also pillow so he could sleep more comfortably on her small couch that fit perfectly to his height. She watched him sleep for a long time, thinking to herself.

They never talked of their hearts. Never mentioned words of affection for each other.

Still, they knew.

Then, what stopped them? What made them run around the circle and frustrated the closest ones who watched?

Fear.

Also, the love itself.

He loved her too much to tie her in a relationship when he had to left for the army and couldn't be there for her in a long time.

She deserved better, he had thought. She deserved someone who could stay around her not just by the heart, but also in the physical distance. And he was not the who could do that.

She was, on the other hand, always been inferior. There were a lot of women out there who were better than her, she always felt that way. So, why should he be with her when he basically could get anyone he wanted?

Then, he got big, his popularity exploded, and it got harder for her to put herself beside him. The gap was getting bigger. He was someone adored by so many people, while she was stuck in the same place as she was years ago. Not forgotten, yet not that popular either. In another words, mediocre.

She lost more courage. He lost more timing.

They still talked to each other, still kept in touch. In fact, his military days were filled with the promised letters she had sent, as he had requested before his enlistment.

She was one of the few people he immediately searched for after his discharge.

He texted her at times, or called her late at night when he was drunk.

They hang out together too, though never just the two of them.

But, what were they? There was no definition.

.

Joongki woke up to a foreign yet familiar ceiling. One glance and he knew already where he was.

He felt lost, couldn't quite believe he actually went there.

He had visited once, he recalled. She had just moved in at that time, finally living separately from her parents.  People kept telling her she should have a housewarming party, and in one of the messages they exchanged, she asked if he would like to come.

He rose up to sit on the couch, after gracing the surface of the warm blanket that she had wrapped over him for or a little while too long. It had her scent, or at least it smelled like how he remembered she should be. A soft and sweet flowery fragrance.

There was no significant change in the livingroom from the last time, other than a painting hanging on the wall that he didn't remember was there before. He looked around, adoring the green plants she arranged around the big glass window.

"You're up."

He heard the sound of a door being closed before he found her figure standing by the wall.

She was still in her sleeping attire and there was dark shade hanging under her eye bag. He should be greeting her morning, or apologizing for crashing into her place without notice and being drunk on top of that. But something was bothering him and needed to be mentioned.

"You still keep it."

She followed the direction of his eyes. In between the greenery she grew inside her place, a smaller and shorter pot was sticking out. It was filled with shrubs, thin and spiky.

The lavender he presented her for the housewarming.

"Oh, that, well, yeah, the plant doesn't require a hard work. It just bloomed two weeks ago, did I never tell you?"

"You didn't tell me, just like many other things."

His words were sharp, but he was smiling, for the first time that day. Or for the first time since he accidentally eavesdrop on Ah In's party guests'conversation last night, about someone hitting on her.

"Did you like it?" He asked, and somehow it made her stared at him for a few passing seconds.

"Of course, you know me, I won't keep anything around me if I don't like it. Be it a plants, or a person."

He was not sure if she was only answering his question, or if she was hinting on something beyond that, on their relationship.

She did it often, talking in blurred lines.

He let her be, worried that she would flee away if he pressed for an explanation. Since he understand the reason behind her hesitation.

The thing he was yet to know, she had spent her night lying awake on the bed, turning and tossing over his words. It was the time, she concluded by three in the dawn, to step up and make a decision.

She leaned in to the wall, crossing both her hands over the stomach. Her round eyes rested sharply on his face.

"Oppa, why are you here?"

It got him taken aback from the sudden shift of mood and tone she was using. Also, she had never been this bold. She had always avoided digging reasons from him, for she didn't know if she could clean after the mess that would follow.

Both of them were the same anyway. Not wanting to let go, but afraid to make a move forward.

Joongki couldn't give anything as the answer to her question. He didn't know why he was there, and had not tried to access his memory on how he reached the place.

"I was drinking at Ah In's farewell party for his enlistment, and..."

Her eyes looked warmer after he spilled the information. Actually, she was a little bit worried if he was out drinking with a woman because Kwangsoo was vacationing abroad with his family and Insung was shooting a new project.

Her head moved in a firm nod. A strand of her hair fell forward and she tuck it back behind her ear, quickly taking the chance to hide her relief and nervousness at the same time.

She left the place she was standing and started walking up to him.

"You told me something last night," she trailed, "I'm not going to repeat it for you, it's your homework to remember."

She reached him, standing in between his parted knees.

He looked up.

She looked down.

Their eyes met, and her small hands cupped both of his cheeks.

"You also asked a question," she said, "and this is my answer."

She leaned in, closing the distance that kept them apart. Her lips brushes his in a short and gentle peck.

She pulled away, her black eyes looking directly into his brown pairs.

"Eat breakfast before you leave."

Her voice was full of affection he found himself swallowing down the non existent saliva.

She left him to the kitchen and he wondered if she just did what he thought she just did. Or whether he had asked her to marry him while he had the courage last night.

He hoped it was not just a cruel dream though, where he woke up with an empty feeling later.

He pinched a bit flesh in his arm.

It hurt.

"Chaewon-ah, I want five kids!"

She replied a little bit too loud.

"Oppa, you must be still drunk."

.

Author's note :

The setting for this one is the year 2017. I've been busy lately and whenever I got back home, I'll be too tired to touch my chaptered stories. It seems like I'm experiencing writer block. I know what I want to write, but whenever I started, it stressed me out.

Strange enough, I've been getting random inspiration for new one shot stories. So, I decided I'm gonna make  special new section to upload my drabble and short one shot stories of Chaeki. I have written three so far, but the other two, I have difficulty in writing the ending. This one is finally finished after I edit it for three times.

So, how are you? How is the fandom situation right now? I'm sorry for keeping you waiting with my other stories. I will write and update again as soon as I regain my energy. Thank you ^^

PS : is there anyone who kindly want to help me to make a poster for my stories? Since I'm really terrible at photoshop and things.