“Chanwoo should cover up”

“He doesn’t have abs so his stomach looks mushy…. Not attractive -_-”

“Ehh...maknae needs to work out hehe”

Chanwoo stares blankly at his phone as the car stops at a red light, he realizes as he re-reads the comments that he’s never really focused on that part of his body. Of course he’s put thought into it like any other idol who has to keep up a certain image but he’s never felt bad for not having abs because he’s never been fat, he’s never felt like he has to fix his stomach because he’s never seen anything wrong with it.

But now that he thinks about it, he’s not as skinny as the rest of his hyungs. Both because he’s younger and still has a bit of that cute baby fat on him but also because he doesn’t work out in the gym as intensely as some of them. Of course he works to maintain his body but it’s mostly through dance and a bit of running, should he take up weightlifting? Diet?

His brows furrows as the thoughts race through his head and his hand tightens around his phone, the music in his ears sounds dull and his eyes are unfocused as he tries to figure out what he’s feeling.

He’s awakened from his state when the car comes to a stop outside of their dorm and he runs a hand through his hair as he tries to wake himself up from his dreamland. He grabs his bag by his feet and jumps out of the car closely followed by Yunhyeong who walks past him to join Donghyuk. Unconsciously Chanwoo covers his stomach as they enter the building with one hand holding his bag, he wonders why he hasn’t noticed before how it’s not the flattest it could be, and he wonders why he hasn’t noticed how unattractive that is.

He takes up his phone again as he flings himself on his bed with his head on his pillow and feet in the air, he lies there for who knows how long while the others go about the dorm doing their thing, whatever that is. Maybe they exercise? Maybe he should too?

A knock on the door startles him and he sits up quickly as it opens showing Donghyuk with a happy albeit a bit tired look on his face, “dinner” he says quietly as he opens the door wider for Chanwoo to exit but at the world Chanwoo’s stomach gurgles uncomfortably and he wonders why, he hasn’t eaten in awhile so he should be hungry.

“Coming” he mumbles and Donghyuk gives him a quick smile before leaving the wooden door open, Chanwoo takes a deep breath as he stands up from his bed, phone in hand with the comments on his mind. One meal won’t make his stomach any fatter will it? As long as he doesn’t overeat it’s all good.

He exits the room and the smell of jajangmyeon hits him full on, it smells delicious and he hurries his steps to the kitchen where the others are already seated. He frowns a bit when he notices how much Jiwon’s putting on his plate and thinks quickly that he can’t eat that much! Not if he wants to lose some of his fat.

“Hyung...I’m not that hungry,” he says as he sits down and Jiwon’s arm freezes in the air as he’s ready to scoop up some more to put on the plate, “really? Are you not feeling well?” he asks and Chanwoo wants to go back to his room immediately. He doesn’t know what he’s feeling, immense guilt? Yes. Extreme sadness? Yes. The extreme urge to tell his hyungs what’s bothering? Yes. But should he?

They’ve been telling him to be more open with them since their Mix and Match days and he’s been trying to talk to them about as much as he can but is this really something that they want to hear? Or should he keep quiet? Apparently he’s been thinking his thoughts in speaking pace because he’s been quiet for many moments now and the others have noticed too.

“Chanwoo?” Jinhwan questions quietly as the boy’s eyes flash to him, Chanwoo’s brows furrows and he bites his lips like he contemplates telling them something or not and if it weren’t for the serious look on his face they wouldn’t be worried but now they are.

“Chanwoo?” Hanbin tries to get the younger’s attention but Chanwoo only bites on his lips harder because now he’s caused a scene and it’ll be hard to forget about it so either he makes a run for it or he tells them what’s bothering him. He gnaws on his lips harder until he actually does draw blood and that’s when Jiwon brings a hand up to the boy’s face and moves his thumb over his plump lip to catch the blood. “Stop it” he tells him and Chanwoo does.

“Chanwoo, what’s wrong?” Yunhyeong asks and Chanwoo sighs as he looks up toward him, it’s now or never, he thinks.

“Do you think I’m fat?” he asks and it’s apparent that they weren’t expecting that because Junhwe drops his chopsticks and the others freeze in whatever action they’re doing. “What?” Donghyuk questions even though he clearly heard him the first time.

“Some fans were commenting about how my stomach is a bit bulgy and that I don’t have abs and that it isn’t attractive and I just started wondering that maybe I am a bit on the bigger side and need to lose some weight so that I can-” Jinhwan is the one to break off his rant with a hand on the table and a sad look on his face. Chanwoo quickly shuts up when he sees how upset his hyung looks.

“Sorry hyung I didn’t mean to upset y-”

“Chanwoo stop it,” Jinhwan says, “you have nothing to apologize for,” he says and he seems a bit more calm now but still has that look of sadness on his face. “You’re not fat,” Hanbin says with a frown on his face, “please don’t think like that,” he adds and he sounds concerned.

“Even if you want to lose weight skipping dinner isn’t the right way to go” Junhwe says out of the blue and Jiwon’s mouth falls open in shock. “Is that why you said you weren’t hungry? Chanwoo, no! Don’t do that” he says sternly and Chanwoo nods but doesn’t look up. He’s instead caught gazing at his knees where his hands are folded.

“Regardless of what stupid thoughts you’ve got up there we’re glad you told us,” Jinhwan says and reaches over the table to grab at Chanwoo’s arm in comfort. “Just knows that we’ll keep an eye on you for the coming weeks so that you don’t fall into any bad food habits or lack thereof, okay?” the eldest hyung kindly states and Chanwoo nods in understanding.

“Okay,” he mumbles but his hyungs don’t seem very happy, “Chanwoo, we’re not mad at you if that’s what you’re thinking” Hanbin says and Chanwoo looks up at him. “Really?” he asks and forces himself to swallow the lump in his throat, “really,” Hanbin reassures him and Chanwoo smiles. “Okay,” he says and this time his hyungs seems satisfied with his answer.

Thaks for reading! Please leave a comment if you have the time!

Have a good day/night/afternoon/morning!