'I think it would be better for all of you to prepare for the worst. If the medication is not working, it may be difficult for us to find the cure. For now, I can't say anything based on her current state. Let the time decide. But, please don't lose in faith because she still has chance to survive.' said the doctor. The doctor's voice was not as cheerful as I thought it would be .

It's a bad news, right ? Although I wasn't there, I really hoped that everyone was not crying. Again .

After the doctor left with a gloomy face, everyone stunned for second. I, on the other hand speechless. My mother was already crying out loud that makes my heart broken. I could hear my sister continued saying 'mom, please don't cry'. Why I always make mother crying ? Mom, please don't cry! I love you! I will survive. I will survive for your sake. Don't believe the doctor. He's lying! 

Unfortunately, those words stuck in my throat. I just simply can't utter any words. Not even move any muscles. I had a dream once. My dream were just a ordinary thing that a human can do all that time. But, it took me almost a month to do so. And I still can't do it . 

To hug my mother and say that everything's will be alright. 

Stop dreaming Hana ! Cause it will not happen ! All you do is just keep breathing through a breathing apparatus ! Your existence is a mistake from the start. A major mistake that everyone in this room suffering just to think a way to make you able to be a normal person again! 

At that moment, everything seemed to be blur. It's like I am fighting with myself. I could still hear wailing and weeping clearly. 

I swear, I will kill that doctor.

                                           ~♦

 Day by day passed and it seemed that I am not recovering or responding at all. I was being caged in my mind, I managed to keep alive but my soul was gone. I trapped inside a small box and surrounded by darkness. Thoughts everywhere so does my eternel hope. 

Everyday, my whole family will come and visit me. I was very happy, indeed. That's the only time where I can hear my mother's angelic voice and my family's supporting words. They encouraged me that no matter what, they love me so much. I was screaming, crying and prying inside that I could reply their words. But, the truth is much more painful to accept. 

My condition was just the worst thing that you could imagine. I was lying on the hospital's bed for months. I couldn't speak nor moving any of my body parts . Because I was pysically unconsious. I cannot be awakened and I failed to respond normally to painful stimuli. In short saying , I was coma due a tragic accident that almost took away my lives. 

Vehicles collision . 

And now, I fight for my own life. To keep alive. 

Because I still not fufill my wishlist . 

Once my mother held my hands and said that her only wish was to see me awake from my never-ending coma. She also said that she cry eveyday because her heart broke when she saw me when thousands of wire and machine around me. For the first time, she cried. 

She never cried before. She smiled. She always tell me that I will wake up from my wildest dream. She said she will never cry in front of me because she knew that I was there, hearing every single words that she said. She believed that even though my body seemed like a dead body but my heart was still beating, my ears can still hear everthing. 

She cried like a baby. She cried and cried. Until her eyes were swollen and red. 

It was understable. Anyone which was in her position, would do the same. I truly understand. 

 

I didn't what day is it or how many days since the accident. All I can think that when will I be able to wake up and released from this prison. But, I certainly know that months have passed. When will someone save me and be my light ? Is there any possiblities that I can possibly make it ? 

I desparately needed to know. My life was in danger. I was fully unconsious despite the consequence of the collison that effect my left brain. All the doctor can do was observing my heart rate and waited for any kind of reaction or respond. 

It was endless and deep. It was never-ending dream. 

In any circumstances, I always hold this qoute.

'Everything happen for a reason.

                         ~♦

The day wasn't bright as usual. It was raining cats and dogs. The rain was pouring heavily outside with thunder rapidly to growl loudly. After a nurse came to do the daily check, she left. Right after I thought that I will be lonely all day long, someone knocked the door lightly. It almost audible but the room was so empty and silent that even a slight movement could be heard clearly. 

Nah, probably the nurse. Why she came back? I thought that- . 

Wait, no. It's a male. It definitely a man. Only guys would wore that scent. But who? 

 

Gradually, he walked towards the chair that located beside my bed. He suddenly stopped. A grasp escaped his mouth. He sat down at the chair and I could felt that he was staring at myself from head to toes. Is it weird if I felt butterflies in my stomach? I think so. For some reason, he didn't do anything - he just sat there. He let out a long, heavy sigh before he hold my right hand. 

He hold my hand, for the god's sake! Mom, a stranger hold my hand! Why he hold my hand? Why did his hand was somehow cold? 

He then clutched my hand like he not wanting to let go. Honestly, his hand seemed to be familiar. I can't remember. I just can't remember this coldness and icy hands . 

 

'Hana' he spoke with a low tone. 

No. 

'Lee Hana' he said again. 

No. This can't be happen. 

'Remember me ?' He asked. 

How am I supposed to forget you ? 

Finally, my knight in shining armor arrived. Thank you for come even it's late, 

Baekhyun. 

                   ~♦

I don't know how many hours have passed. He just sat there, silently as if he was a mute or something. 

But, his presence enough to make me feel calm and secure. Long, deep and heavy sighs continued to slip from his mouth. At that moment, I started to doubt about his identity. Where is my cheerful, sassy and cute Baekhyun? Baekhyun is not that type of silent, awkward and noiseless kind of person. 

He is definitely not Baekhyun that I used to know. He is not. 

'How are you ?' he asked. That statement scared me actually.

I miss my old Baekhyun. 

I miss the happy Baekhyun. 

I miss the talkative Baekhyun. 

I miss him a lot. 

Why he was not being himself? Why he was different? Those questions kept lingered in my mind. 

'It's been a while, right? I still remembered in the past that we would always play a game where we were acting like a married couple. We would make our house beneath a tree behind of your house. Then, you made some chocolate cake and fed me happily. Even the chocolate cake wasn't really tasty but I pretended that it's delicious. I don't know wheather you knew it or not, but I had a little crush on you. To me, you are the most beautiful girl I haven't met ever in my life. If there is any chance, I want us to be like that for one last time. For once. So, please wake up. Wake up so that we can live like that for another time. ' he said. 

If I can held his hands. If God allowed me to hold his hands, I am ready to prepare for my death. 

I can't bear to see my childhood friend suffered because of me. I mean, he just confessed his true feeling. Of course, I need to wake up to give an answer. 

Well, I don't know that he liked me. I should have know that before. 

I was mad blushing right now. 

                 ~♦

Everything was going pretty much the same. Except, Baekhyun would come to visit me every day in the afternoon. He told me tons of story about his life, his dogs, his sisters and random things that happen during that day. I heard every details of his story because I was not sure if I can hear another story the next day. Sometimes, he would bring me flowers and placed it right beside of me. Out of those flowers that he brought, my favourite flower would be the baby's breath. 

As if he knew that I love the scent of baby's breath, he brought the flower whenever he went to the florist every Friday. That's what he told me. The existence of Byun Baekhyun brighten my day, including my feelings towards him.

When I was a kid, I love to play with him. I would became worried and frustrated if he was not coming to our secret place. I called it as our rendezvous. I wasn't really sure about my feelings about him. He is just merely a good friend. 

 A first love or a good friend? 

I was also self-conscios about it. It's no longer a question because my heart just knew it. The latter wasn't an option anymore. 

Being able to actually have a boyfriend is my never-ending dream. 

I guess it will be stay as a dream. 

 

'Hana, I will go home now. Take care, okay?' he said. He held my hands for a second before stood up. 

I could sense a bitter vibe surrounding him. He then said 'Don't stop fighting for your life, okay?' 

I will. 

I will survie. 

I will survive no matter what. 

Even if I might die tomorrow, I wil fight to stay alive today. 

I promise. 

 

With that, he left. 

 

The baby's breath wasn't smell as strong as I thought. I can't savor the scent of it yet it's just adorable and beautiful.

A soft click of the front door interrupted my peaceful night. A nurse came in to check my things every hours. 

Honestly, I hate that nurse. The one who wear perfume. A lot of perfume. I wished someone would cover my nose from that dangerous odor. 

Plus, she's rude . 

"Why can't you just die huh?" she sighed loudly. "You make my job twice more tougher than before. You should have die during that incident. Unfortunely, you magically alive until now."

Trying to talk bad about me? How dare you . I will remember you. 

"What a funny thing. I am certainly sure that you will not survive that long. Either your family decided to stop it or you just lose hope. We never know." she dissed. 

With a small laugh, she walked out of my room. She then continued,"Good luck, dear." 

Just go away, you wicked witch. 

                   ~♦  

"She is definitely a good girl. I remembered once that she ...." 

Bla bla bla bla. I knew that I was kind of sound like a spoil brat but let me tell you one thing. When someone you didn't know talking, it felt like you were lost. 

Still don't understand? Just imagine you were in a very complicated mazed and you can't find the way out. 

In my case, there was no way out. 

My imagination were going wild at that time and I can't help it but feeling extremely aware of my surrounding. 

You don't really need to understand this part.

Speaking of imagination, I've been discovered something new. 

Sort of. 

Lately, I found out that I started to react to stimula. 

I wasn't really do anything but perhaps, I unconsciously made a slight improvement. At least, the world knew that I am on my way to wake up.  

The doctor said that I had a bigger chance to survive. 

For once, I felt I want to hug that doctor. 

                                                                                                                                                          

                                                                                                                                     //a little reminder here, this heart indicates the changing of point of view. 

                                                                                                                                                                               It could be either Hana or someone else //

 

She was sleeping. Yeah, she just sleeping. 

The doctor said that she was in the deep sleep. But, why she slept for such a long time. Why my princess didn't wake up? 

Are she tired? She probably tired because of her college. 

Nothing to worry about, right? 

     'She is in coma state right now. The car collison that occured hurt her brain and effect brain's cell. Which leads to unconsciosness. I will explain everything more futher after this. Based on her condition, I can't make any predictation on when will she wake up. I need to conduct a few more test on her to assure the suitable treatments for her. ' 

Right after he left the room, I was shocked. I was in a major mental breakdown. Thousands of thoughts run across my minds. 

I staggered a little before fall onto the floor. As if the world was about to end, I cried. I cried out loud. Words were not enough to explain my feelings. 

Every night, I pray for her. Pray for forgiveness.  Pray for a glimpse of hope and strenght to go through this woes. 

A small bits in my heart was ready to face whatever it takes to save my daughter but, I couldn't help myself to feel more and more hopeless as she was getting close to the limit of her endurance.  

I will not give up on her. Not until I can finally see her smile and then, I can take a breath of relief.  

 

'I have something important to say. If you have some time, could we talk in my room?' the doctor asked. I was carefully followed the doctor to his room. We arrived at the elevator and waited for a couple of minutes before the elevator's door opened. 

The elevator was empty. Too empty for my own liking. Thousand of questions started to across my mind. The doctor seemed to be realizing how quiet we was in the elevator and started a short conversation. 

'How's everything going?'

'Everything is fine for now except the absent of my daugther was too hard to be handle'

'I bet it is' 

'There was a young man came into Hana's room not long ago. I don't think that Hana have a brother, is it?' he asked. 

'It's one of her friend. Her childhood friend, actually. He came to Korea not long ago. He said to me that he wanted to visit Hana before he flies to US' 

'He currently study in US?' 

'Yeah. It's his last year'. In no time, the elevator's door opened. The doctor lead me to his room which was not that far from the elevator. They sat on a leather sofa and there were two cups of coffee on a round glass table in front of the sofa. 

'Sorry if the coffee is cold' 

I never felt so nervous in my entire life. 

                     ~♦