Five
Terms of RemorseLee Seunghyun – Seoul, June 2016
“Manager Lee, Lee Sajang awaiting in line 3”
“Yes, thank you Sora-shi,” Smiled to my secretary, I picking up the call from my father, “Yes Sajang?”
“Seunghyun-ah,” Said my dad and from his voice I can tell that he’s tired, “Its 6 P.M already. Aren’t you going home already? You still have a work unfinished?”
“Not yet, dad. I still have 2 documents to read. How about you? Don’t you go home already?”
“Ah really? Then I’ll wait for you. Go home with me today, Seunghyun. I already tell your driver to go home,” I hummed as response and he hangs up the call.
Back in concentration to finish the task, I’m starting to review the report from the marketing department. I work in marketing department in the moment. As an heir to the company, my dad asked me to fill all the position in the company, so that I can learn more and know directly about the business. He wants me to be ready to take his position later in the future. Despite his over love for me, business is business. I get that and I promised to him and myself to work hard to be a deserve heir. However, even he’s not showing it directly, he worried and nagged too much if I work overtime. After all, he only has me. Our family change much after my mom and my sibling died. We changed.
Lee Seunghyun – Seoul, January 2008
“Do you want to order another meat, Seunghyun?” Dad asked me, hesitant.
Shaking my head as an answer, I continued flip the meat for my dad and me. The comfortable silence back as both of us didn’t have any effort to make a conversation. Too immersed to our own thought. Or maybe too lost in the comfortable silence. Silence is what we have in our life for the past two years. Only said a few words for a needed matter. Maybe both of us didn’t know how to break it. The silent didn’t give us the answer, but it gives us an escape to accept the pain that lingered.
For two years, my dad grief in silent. Punished himself to the silent. Putting all the remorse that eats him to the silent. However, he will always takes care and loves me in his silent. Sometimes, I feel like he’s afraid to break his silence because he would make the same mistake. The truth is, I don’t know. I never asked. What I know is, in silent we grasped each other presence. Desperately needing each other, because we only have each other in the end.
Lee Seunghyun – Seoul, June 2016
“What do you want for dinner? Grilled meat?” Sitting beside
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