[Soojung's POV]

September 2014. 

It's actually over.  The show finally ended; I can no longer publicly appear with Unnie from now on... heck, I probably can't even visit her since she'll be so busy.  My heart aches whenever I think back to the times I caught her trying to muffle her cries by biting her hand just so that my parents and I wouldn't wake up.  Why? I'm so confused, hurt, and furious about how her members just abandoned her like that, even if there are two sides to every story, how did everything end up so complicated like this?  I want to cry. I want to lash out at them.  But I know that I can't, because despite knowing deep in my heart, that I will always side with Jessica, I can also recall all those moments that several of the members have treated me as their own sibling as well.  Like when Tiffany unnie bought me food and took care of me while Jessica was out of town.  Or Yoona unnie coming over to hang out with me and making sure that Sulli and I were ok when that whole thing about my behavior and attitude blew up.   It hurts so much, and I just want to crawl into a hole and never come out again.  Unnie's currently in New York right now, and I miss her so. so much.  I want to show her that I can me there for her.  I will always be there for her.  I'm not the only one that must lean on her at all times now that I'm older... I want to be able to have her lean on me now too instead of carrying such a heartbreaking burden on her fragi