Seulgi

I take the time that I need. That's what I tell everyone.

I'm not slow. I take the time that I need.

To fully comprehend the world.

To analyze every situation.

To enjoy every breath I take.

To feel.

I'm not slow. I take the time I need.

That's why I hate when I'm stuck yet again in this kind of situation.

"When will you start to study something normal?!"

My mother is trying, once again, to make me feel bad for my decision of studying Fine Arts. Which, I know, it was against my parents will.

"You're twenty two, Seulgi! People at your age are about to get jobs! Real jobs!" 

I breathe in, trying to remain calm, while she's getting redder and redder as time goes by. How did this conversation even start? I recall having mentioned that I had to have breakfast in a hurry because I'm already late for drawing class. Yet here I am, unable to leave the kitchen because my mother has gone again to her usual routine of trying to point out my flaws.

"Look at your brother! He has a job and he's living on his own! He's even about to have a family! And he's just four years older than you, Seulgi."

Of course, at some point of the usual conversation - more like monologue - she always mentions my older brother. 

"When will you have a real job, Seulgi?"

I leave the plate inside the dishwasher and look at her in the eyes for the first time ever since I entered the kitchen. 

The vein in her forehead seems to get bigger as she glares at me. My mother, who is supposed to love me and respect what I do.

I sigh. 

I take my bag and I leave the house, though I still can hear her screaming. I used to fight back when I was in my first year of college, but she has been like that every day. I managed to get a job for my first and second year and I rented a room in a shared apartment for a while. But my earnings faded when I lost that job and I struggled to find a new one until I was left with no other option than going back to my parent's house.

It's hard, but at least I have a roof on top of me. I sleep on the couch because when I left, my mother turned my bedroom into a gym. The good part of this is that I can watch dramas until I fall sleep.

My father doesn't still accept my decision, but he's more tolerant than my mother. He sometimes chimes into the monologues and reminds her to calm down. He's not really supportive though. Not that he has ever said anything to me, either.

My relationship with my family was complicated enough even before I became a Fine Arts major, so, though I think there's not anything sadder than saying this, I'm used to it.

I don't let it affect me because I can't let myself fall.

I'm all that I have.

As I reach the bus stop, I remind myself once again that I must apply for that call for proposals for an exposition in Montreal, Canada. I have been working on a collection of paintings that are perfect for that exposition, and all my teachers agree that I have a lot of chances for being selected. It would be absolutely fantastic if that happened because that would mean having enough money to spend a year away from my family.

There's only a little problem.

I'm not really confident about my English skills. I have learnt it at school, sure, but I've always been really shy and I have never really spoke it aloud. I was approached by a foreigner once and I began to stutter.

I have a friend who is now living in United States - Soojung. She was half American and she sometimes spoke in English with her parents on the phone, and I'm proud to say that I understood all the things she said. But still, I'm not sure if my pronunciation would be right.

I get on the bus and I put my headphones on, ready to nap my way to college.

Once my eyes snap open, I take some seconds to fully realize that the bus has arrived. I gasp and I stand up before I begin to run for my life. At times like these I'm glad I use my bedroom's gym. My drawing teacher isn't exactly rude or strict - she's actually the opposite, in fact-, but I really need to work on my sketches.

Just when I'm about to get to the  classroom, I bump into a random girl who was putting something on the bulletin board.

"Oh my, I'm sorry." I apologize, bowing at her as I kneel down to pick up the papers that have fallen. She shakes her head, trying to stop me from doing so.

"It's no prob. I was struggling to put these on. It's so hard to do so when I only have two hands."

She chuckles and now that I look at her, her smile reminds me to something. I'm not quite sure what, though. She looks really young for being at  the college, but honestly, I'm really clueless when it comes to guessing ages.

It takes me a short time to fully realize that the girl needs help.

"Do you want me to help you hang these?" I suggest. She shakes her head politely. "Please. To pay you back from having bumped into you."

She seems to consider it but she shakes her head again.

"It's okay, really, unnie. It's my job after all." I pout at her words and she seems to notices as she chortles at it. "Okay, how about you help me with this one?"

I nod and I hold the paper as she sticked it to the billboard with some adhesive tape. She sighs with relief and she brings her free hand to her hip, looking at it with pride.

"Thank you for your help, unnie!" She exclaims, bowing at me. I chuckle and I shake my head.

"It was nothing."

She waves at me and she leaves, jumping slightly as she walks.

Squirtle!

That's what she reminded me of!

I look at the ad she has just put and I stare at it. It's from a restaurant I have seen advised before. I wonder if that girl works there. She seemed to be too young to be working, but she said that putting those ads was her job.

Oh my, I'm spacing out a little.

What was I supposed to do?

My eyes meet the eyes of a certain drawing and I jump slightly on the spot. On the billboard there's an ad with an Olaf drawn on it that catches my attention.

Native Canadian looking for language exchange, English - Korean.

Contact: sonwendy001 @ yahoo . com

I hope we get along ^_^

My eyes widen a little.

It's just perfect!

That was what I was looking for!

I take my phone out and snap a picture at the ad. I make sure that it's readable and I put it back in my pocket, reminding myself to e-mail her after class.

Class.

Oh cheese!

I better go now!

I'm not slow, but I'm surely taking a lot of time. I know. If someone happened to be next to me right now, he or she would be really frustrated at how slow I am.

I have read the e-mail I'm about to send plenty of times, just to make sure that it was understandable. There are some words I had to look up at an online dictionary.

I breathe in as I read it once again.

Hello! My name is Kang Seulgi and I am an Fine Arts major in Seoul's National University. I am 22 years old.

I am writing you regarding to the ad at the billboard about the language exchange.

Are you still interested in it?

I hope we get along as well if you do ^_^

I'm quite ashamed that I had to search "how to write an e-mail in English" on Yahoo.

I hope he/she - though I assume it's a she, because her name seems to be Wendy - doesn't mind my gramatical errors or typos if she does find them.

Sigh.

I press the 'enter' button and I wait for the message that pops up saying 'sent!'. I let out a relieved sigh when I see it.

Now I just have to wait for the answer.

I open the picture I was using as reference for my drawing and I go back into sketching on my sketchpad.

Five minutes go by and I'm startled by the sound the laptop does when a new e-mail arrives. I open it and I'm surprised that it's from her.

Hello Seulgi!

I'm totally interested in the language exchange! I'm glad that you answered to the ad, I was starting to wonder what had I done wrong... Nobody really e-mailed me and it has been a month since I put the ad... hehe.

My name is Son Wendy. You may call me Wendy! I'm from Canada. I'm a literature major who is on a scholarship to study here at Seoul's National. I'm 22 years old too. So I'm not quite sure if you're my unnie or if I am, haha

Maybe I'm a little bit straightforward, Seulgi, but would you like to meet? Maybe we could hang out and have a coffee. I'll pay! ^_^

I hope I'm not being too eager, hehe. I'll be waiting for your answer!

- Wendy

I smile at the e-mail. She seems kind and from what I have read seems quite perky too. I clear my throat, even though e-mailing someone has nothing to do with my voice and I crack my knuckles before I begin typing again. This time it seems way easier than the first e-mail. Maybe because her attitude has made me feel better about myself.

Hi Wendy!

I would totally like to meet you, yes. Though you don't have to pay for me, hehe. Coffee is fine. I know a really nice place near college. You probably know it by now, um, I might type it wrong... Don't U Wait Anymore? I think it's something like that. It's American themed and it's so calm inside. A perfect place for a language exchange!

I'm free on Wednesday afternoon, are you in? :D

I'll wait for your answer!

- Seulgi

I stare at the screen, doubting myself again.

I decide to add a PS.

PS. You're not too eager. You're cute!

I wonder if Canadians use the word 'cute' as much as we do. Maybe it's not appropiate to call her cute.

I give it a thought and I decide to erase it.

Huh?

Why has the screen changed?

"Sent!"

Oh, cheese!

I facepalm myself, which calls the attention of the other students who are in the study hall. I decide to pay no attention to them and I sigh out loud. I put the music I had in the background a little louder and I go back to drawing from the picture I had as reference.

Soon, I get an answer from Wendy.

Hi again Seulgi!

I loooove that place you have told me. Don't U Wait No More is a really nice place. I'm also free on Wednesday afternoon, so I'm in! Around 4PM?

I'm looking forward to meet you!

- Wendy

PS: hehehe I'm glad ^_^ You're cute too, Seulgi!

I feel myself blushing at the last sentence and I take no time in giving her an affirmative answer about the time she had set.

After our e-mailing conversation is over, I keep drawing but my chest feels lighter.

Even a little bit warmer.

I make sure to read her message again as I make my way inside the American styled cafeteria.

Look for a short blonde with a blue Oxford sweatshirt sitting alone on a table reading a book of Shakespeare :P

I get on my tiptoes and I spot the only blonde hair in the cafeteria.

Blonde short girl? - checked.

With a blue sweatshirt? - checked.

Sitting alone on a table - checked.

Reading a book (not sure if it's from Shakespeare) - checked.

I walk up to her, a light smile already on my lips now that I'm going to meet that nice Canadian, though my nervousness over my English skills is still there. I pat her shoulder lightly and she gets her earphones out.

"Wendy?" I ask clumpsily.

She nods. "You must be Seulgi. Hi!" She stands up and she offers her hand for a handshake, which I gladly take. "I'm Wendy. It's a pleasure to meet you finally."

I shake her hand and I have a look at her features.

Her eyes - there's something sparkling inside them, even though they're dark brown. Something in her eyes makes me want to stare for longer.

Her nose - so small, perky. I trace it with my eyes and I can't help but notice her eyebrows when I go back up. They are nicely placed, making her face seem so angular.

Her lips - their shape is so pretty, gently curved into a smile. I think I've never seen someone smile like that when meeting a stranger.

Specially when this stranger is staring at her.

Oh.

Right.

I should say something before she freaks out.

I curve my own lips into a smile and I try my best to pronounce right. "It's nice to meet you too, Wendy."

Her smile only widens at my words and she points at the seat in front of her. "Come on, sit down, sit down! I'll order something else to drink."

I nod my head shyly and I take my coat off. I sit on the couch in front of her and I leave the coat next to me, placing my hands on my lap in order to make myself comfortable on the seat.

Wendy waves at the waitress and she comes in no time. 

I recognize her in no time and my eyes widen, not sure on when had I seen her the last time.

"Yes, miss?" She politely asks, taking her notepad out. Wendy takes the menu on the table and she points at what she wants, but she manages to say it in Korean as well.

"The house's special warm chocolate."

How cute!

She has quite an accent, but overall, it's really cute and she has a good pronunciation.

She looks up at me with doubt filling her eyebrows. "Have I said it right?"

I nod, trying to give her a reassuring smile.

The squirtle looking waitress nods and hums in answer before turning to me. She seems to have recognized me as well as she gasps slightly and she points at me with her pen.

"You're the unnie from the other day!"

I suddenly remember her after a couple of blinks.

The squirtle girl who was putting the ads on the billboard!

"That's why your face looked familiar to me. Hi!" I wave at her, smiling politely. I side eye Wendy, who is paying close attention to our conversation, leaning forward to catch every word.

It must be hard to be in a country where you don't understand most of the things you hear.

"What would you like to order, unnie?" The squirtle looking girl reminds me.

Oh.

Right!

"I'll have the same as her."

Wendy seems to have understood since she flashes a knowing smile at me before bowing at the waitress as she took the cup away from the table. The girl walks away and goes to prepare the drinks.

"We have a sweet tooth, definitely." Wendy chuckles as she lookes at the menu.

"Hm?" I automatically say.

What does sweet tooth mean?

My teeth are not sweet...

"I mean that we both like sweet things. It's a usual saying in Canada. Sweet tooth." She points at her own teeth.

She's so cute.

Why can't I stop thinking about how cute she is?

I raise my eyewbrows and I nod in understanding. "English is complicated."

Wendy raises one eyebrow in moked annoyance. "Do you really want to talk about complicated languages, Korean girl?" She chuckles, like trying to make sure that I understand that she's just joking. I open my mouth to answer, keeping a teasing tone, but she quickly realizes something and she tries to say something. "Oh, right, I didn't ask you. Have I pronounced your name right?" She asks, tilting her head to the side.

She kind of looks worried about saying it right. "Seulgi?"

I nod. "Yes, you pronounced it right. It's Seulgi."

I can't help but chuckle when she lets out a relieved sigh.

Just how cuter can this girl get?

"I'm sorry, I get nervous about pronouncing the names right. I'm not even sure if I can't even pronounce my korean name right." She giggles, playing with her fingers on the table. Quite an unique gesture. She seems like taken out from a drama.

I tilt my head with curiousity. "What's your korean name?"

She opens the Shakespeare book and she flips it so I can see it.

Her name is writen on the first page of the book.

"Son Seungwan." I read aloud before looking up at her.

"I wasn't wrong then. Seungwan." She repeated her own name, like trying to reproduce the pronunciation. "Can you repeat it, please?"

"Seungwan." I repeat. She gives me all kind of tender feelings when I look at how she pays close attention to how my lips move.

"Seungwan." She repeats after me. "It sounds so nice in your voice."

I'm about to ask her a question, but before I can figure out how to make the question, she talks first. "Your voice is so nice! Do you happen to be a singer?"

I shrug in answer. "I used to sing in a band long time ago."

forms a perfect 'o' and she nods in understanding. "I wish I had been here to hear you sing with the band."

I giggle. "We weren't that good, you know? Not for a Canadian to come to Seoul to see us." 

She chuckles and she's about to say something but the squirtle girl comes back with our drinks. We both thank her and Wendy humms as she inhales the sweet aroma of the chocolate.

"Yummy." She mutters in that cute accent she has.

She's really adorable. 

Can I please stop innerly saying that she's cute?

"Are you half korean?" I ask her to keep my mind from wandering about why she is so cute.

"No, I'm full korean. Well, my parents are korean but I consider myself more of a Canadian, you know? I have been raised there and my parents always talked to me in English."

I really like how her eyebrows move when she's explaining something. It's something nice to look at.

I nod in understanding. "It's a pity that you didn't get to learn two languages."

"Well, in fact, I did learn two languages." She chortles. 

Her laughter is so melodious.

Is this girl even real?

"I learnt French as well."

I nod again as I take the little spoon and put it in the chocolate. I recall having talked with my teachers when I said that I was going to send my artworks for the call for proposals - in Canada, both French and Engish are official languages after all.

"Seulgi?" She calls my name. I wonder if I have been spacing out. I look up at her and tilt my head slightly.

"Hm?"

"Thank you for e-mailing me." She slowly says. She seems to have rehearsed that sentence, since she emphasizes every word. "I'm having a lot of trouble learning Korean."

I try to give her a reassuring smile again, hoping that it would calm her down. I talk slowly, though I have the feeling that she understands korean, but she just has trouble speaking it.

"It's okay, Wendy." I tap my fingers on the table. I look at her hand and I doubt if touching her hand will be a good idea. I decide to leave it on top of the table instead. "Your Korean is good."

"Really?" She asks, genuinely surprised. Her eyebrows have gone up and her jaw is slightly hanging open.

What a cute person, really.

"Sure!" I feel that my lips are curving on its own, and that smile appears mirrored on her lips, too. She lets out a chuckle, that's followed by her laughter. 

"I'm so glad I'm finally getting to practice!" She exclaims, cupping the mug with both her hands. "My flatmate talks really fast and I can't really catch what she says. She doesn't really speak English either so it's really complicated to find someone to talk to, since most of my classmates are foreigners as well."

I nod in understanding, though I don't really know if I can really relate to her situation since I have never been in her situation.

She reaches out and she places her hand on top of mine.

She's so warm.

It must be because she just cupped the warm mug but it stil feels so right.

"I'm happy that I met you, Seulgi." 

Her words give me goosebumps. 

I can't help but smile as I answer.

"I'm happy that I met you, too, Wendy."

She gives my hand a gentle squeeze and she chortles.

She's so bright I can't get my eyes off her.

She grabs the mug by the handle and she raises it up at me. "Cheers for our friendship! Cheers!"

I giggle at her cute accent and I raise my mug as well. "Cheers for our friendship."

As the afternoon went by I couldn't admirating all the small gestures Wendy did. 

Like how she paid close attention to my lips when I talked in Korean or how she slowed down and explained things to me when I didn't understand them in English.

She's really kind. I'm glad I found that ad.

Now that I'm alone in the living room, I'm sitting on the couch with the laptop on my legs, ready to write once again. It has become a new tradition for a while. I have been working on a plotline for some time now, but I haven't really had time to write the thing - I'm not sure if it will be a short writing or maybe a long story- so I take some minutes before I go to bed to write.

I press my lips together in a line as  I stare at the blank Word document. I crack my knuckles and begin typing the first things that come to my mind.

Gentleness was the word that defined her the most. 

Gentle, caring, loving.

She was everything he would never be, but she still tried to understand him.

She was always bright and she make the hard things easier.

He wondered if he would ever be able to pay her back for his clumpsiness.

But he also knew that she didn't need any of that.

She loved him.

I rub my eyes. I don't really think that I'm catching the exact feelings, but this is a nice start.

I make sure to save it and I close the laptop, placing it underneath the couch as I like down. I put the blanket over me and I make myself comfortable. I turn off the lights and I turn my face to the back of the couch, cuddling against it.

A small beep startles me. I take my phone in order to silence it but when I unlock it I find a new e-mail from Wendy. I sit up and pay full attention to what she has writen.

Because Wendy has writen in Korean.

Hi Seulgi! :D

I just wanted to thank you for today. I had a lot of fun. ^_^

I'm really looking forward to meet you every Wednesday!

Thank you again and sleep well!

- Wendy

I smile at her words and I make sure to type my answer. I doubt about using English or Korean, but since she had e-mailed me in Korean, I decide to go with that.

Hi Wendy! ^^

I'm really happy that you had fun, because I had fun as well. You're really nice!

I really can't wait either!

Thank you as well and rest well, Wendy! It's really important to get a good amount of sleep!

- Seulgi

I look at what I have writen, trying to put myself in Wendy's place. I change some things here and there to make it simpler and I send it to her. I put the phone on silence mode and I go back to my sleeping position, the sleep catching me shortly after I closed my eyes, the memory of the wonderful afternoon with Wendy making the usual coldness of the leather couch warmer and my dreams brighter.

Author's note:

Here we are! First chapter! And there is so much to go!

I hope you enjoy this fanfic and wow, I'm really surprised about the subscribers! This is crazy! I didn't expect to get so many in a short amount of time.

You are wonderful, really. Have a nice day or night and keep safe!

Peace!