Taekwoon doesn't like their new house that much.

It's small, even smaller than their apartment. There's a living room that makes up most of the house, a kitchen that's connected to it, a bathroom, and a bedroom. There's not even a laundry room, and Taekwoon doesn't understand how they're going to wash their clothing without one. The house on the outside is very square and is made of concrete. It's ugly and shabby looking. Taekwoon just does not like it.

Hakyeon seems to though. He studies Taekwoon as the landlord, an old man that walks with a cane, gives them a tiny "tour" of the house. It's really a tour for just Taekwoon, since Hakyeon's been here several times already. He told Taekwoon before he saw it that it was cute and warm and cozy. He's lied.

"Do you like it?" he asks when the landlord is done, pulling Taekwoon aside in the bedroom to talk with him. Just like the rest of the house, the room is tiny. Taekwoon doesn't see how their new bed is going to fit in here along with the rest of their belongings. It's going to be cramped, he knows already.

"I know it's small," Hakyeon continues, like he was reading the other's mind, "but we don't need anything too big anyway. And rent is really cheap. It's in a secluded area, not too many neighbors. I bet you like that, huh?" 

Taekwoon does like that a bit. He chews on his bottom lip as he thinks on what to say - a bad habit he's picked up recently. Sometimes when he gets too anxious he even manages to draw blood. Hakyeon reaches into his pocket and holds out a stick of gum, which Taekwoon takes. That was his solution he thought of a while ago, to give him gum to chew on instead. It works pretty well. "The laundry room," Taekwoon finally speaks. "There's no laundry room."

"We'll go once a week to the laundromat to do the laundry," Hakyeon says. "Or just me, if you don't want to. It doesn't matter. But our clothes will be getting washed, don't worry, okay?." He gives Taekwoon a reassuring smile, hand going up to pet through his hair. That does make Taekwoon feel just a little bit better. Not just about the laundry but about the rest of the house too. He trusts Hakyeon. If he says not to worry, then Taekwoon is not going to worry. Or, at least he'll try not to.

-

Packing is hard, because every once in a while Taekwoon comes across something interesting, like an old stress ball he completely forgot about or one of his movies he hasn't watched in forever. Hakyeon says that they need to get rid of some things, and to just throw away stuff like that so it doesn't sit around in their new house and take up space. But Taekwoon will sit with the stress ball, squeezing it over and over, thinking about how much he's going to miss it if he was to throw it out, despite the fact that he has like three other new stress balls he plays with.

They each have a trash bag to throw their stuff away in. Taekwoon's has half a pencil and a sock with three holes. Hakyeon's is half full - he has no problem with throwing things away. Either that or he just has too many belongings. 

Taekwoon sits the stress ball in his "maybe" pile. He goes back into the drawer he's currently on, grabbing a book. It's his favorite book from when he was younger that's he kept all these years, about a small bunny that was born with no tail and got picked on by all the other bunnies. Taekwoon isn't sure if he should keep this or not. He likes the story, but it's written for preschoolers. His birthday is soon and he'll be twenty-five, it would be silly for him to keep it. He'll throw it away, even if it makes him a bit sad.

Taekwoon decides to read the book for one last time before putting it in his trash bag. He opens it up, and a picture falls out. 

It's him when he was just a baby with his sisters. His eldest sister is holding him, and they're sitting in front of a Christmas tree. It really surprises Taekwoon - he doesn't recall having this picture in the book. He's not sure if he's ever even seen it before now, if he has it must have been a while. 

Taekwoon feels a sudden wave of sadness go over him. He hasn't seen his sisters in a long time, not since he moved to the city with Hakyeon after they graduated. He didn't even get to say goodbye to two of them. His middle sister had gave him a hug, which was weird. He's never had a true relationship with any of them. His parents kind of kept them separated.

He wonders what his sisters are doing now. He knows his eldest one (Misol? Minsol? or something) is married, she was married already when he left home. Jeohyun was in culinary school, and the other one whose name has completely slipped his mind was just starting out as a nurse. That's how much their parents separated them - Taekwoon struggles to even remember their names properly. It makes him a little sad.

He's so immersed in the picture and memories he barely notices Hakyeon get up from his spot on the floor, yawning loudly. "It's getting late," he says. "Let's finish this tomorrow." He looks over at Taekwoon, eyes going to the picture in his hand. Taekwoon shuts it back into the book as quickly as he can. He doesn't feel like talking about it right now. Hakyeon looks curious but doesn't pry, just gives Taekwoon a pat on the head before heading out to wash his face before sleep. 

Taekwoon follows. He puts the book in his "keep" pile before doing so.

-

Unpacking is just as hard is packing. Their first night in their new house is spent doing so, placing dishes in the cabinets and hanging clothes in the closet. Taekwoon never wants to move again, it's too much annoyance and work. Hakyeon seems to not mind it, singing Christmas carols under his breath. "It's almost Christmas," he says defensively, but that's not true. December is still three months away.

They don't have any furniture just yet. Since Hakyeon's parents redecorated their house, they're going to visit this weekend and give them some of their old furniture. For now though, they have to eat the fried chicken they ordered by sitting on a blanket in the living room floor, which isn't very comfortable.

"It's like an indoor picnic," Hakyeon says. Taekwoon wonders how he manages to stay so optimistic all the time. 

They have to sleep on the floor as well, because their new bed hasn't been delivered. They do this in their bedroom, surrounded by boxes they haven't gotten around to yet. Hakyeon lays down nearly every blanket they have in order to make it as comfortable as possible. It's still not as nice as real bed though. Taekwoon tosses and turns for at least an hour before he manages to fall asleep.

-

The weekend is busy. Hakyeon's parents comes with a couch, a recliner, and an armchair. Taekwoon claims the recliner as his immediately and curls up into it once they get it set up. It feels amazing after sleeping on a floor for three nights. 

Speaking of which, the bed is delivered that day as well - two men come in with the bed pieces in a big box, and stays to assemble it. It's a lot to take in for Taekwoon, all of these people in a new house he's still not used to. He thinks he's going to lose his cool so he locks himself in the bathroom. He feels a little better after splashing cold water onto his face though. He sits in the bathtub until the bed men leave.

Hakyeon's parents eats dinner with them before leaving. The house is back to being quiet with just Taekwoon and Hakyeon... until Hakyeon announces that he's going to vaccuum. 

Taekwoon hates the vaccuum. It's too loud and it hurts. He has to go outside until Hakyeon is done. "It'll be really quick, I promise," he says.

Taekwoon entertains himself by kicking around his soccer ball. He's really into soccer nowadays, like he was back in school. He plays soccer a lot with his friend Se Il, and Se Il's friends, Minseok and someone else whose name Taekwoon doesn't remember. Taekwoon was nervous the first time he played with them, because they're normal people, not like himself and Se Il. But they're nice normal people. Like Hakyeon.

Taekwoon gets too caught up in his thoughts and accidentally kicks the soccer ball too hard. It flies through the air, across the yard, and into the bushes of the house next to them. This house is also small and concrete, but the concrete is painted a pale green and is surrounded by pretty flowers so it's not as ugly as theirs. Taekwoon goes over to retrieve his ball, pausing for a moment when he notices a huge red rose bush. He loves roses because they smell nice, and he leans down near the bush to get a whiff of these. They're very sweet smelling. It pleases him. He would stand here all night if he could.

"Hey," the sudden voice startles Taekwoon, causing him to jump. He looks to see a woman standing at the back door of the house, not very far from him, a finger pointed in his direction. "What are you doing? Get away from my rose bushes!"

Taekwoon nods, and just starts to step away slowly. He didn't mean to make this woman upset. He was just smelling the flowers. "Sorry," he remembers to say, but it's so low she must not hear him. She just keeps yelling.

"Get out of my yard! Do you not see the No Trespassing sign? Get out before I call the police!" 

Taekwoon did see the sign before, but he hadn't paid it any attention because he doesn't really know what trespassing means. It must be bad, especially if she's going to call the police. Taekwoon doesn't like police, they're not nice normal people. And neither is this woman. "Sorry," he says again, a bit louder this time. "Don't call the police."

Taekwoon quickly retreats back into his own yard. The woman is still standing outside, watching him closely. He sits down next to his front door and covers his face with his hands - he knows she can still see him, but he can't see her so it's kind of like she's not there anymore. That sounds silly, but it's true. He doesn't know when she goes back in, or how long he sits there like that. It's not very long though because Hakyeon soon opens the door to tell him he can come in now.

"Are you okay?" he asks as Taekwoon gets up from off the ground. Taekwoon nods eventhough he really isn't okay. But he doesn't want to talk about the incident with the woman right now, or ever probably, so he just keeps quiet.

-

A lot of things add up over time that makes Taekwoon break down. 

There's moving and the new house and all the people that went in it their first week of living in it like the electrician, the guy from the cable company, the landlord and his wife, Hakyeon's parents, the bed men. There's the neighbor that yelled at him, and the elderly couple across the street that has two outdoor cats but doesn't like for Taekwoon to play with them, because they're afraid he's going to hurt them. ("I'll get your own cat, Taekwoonie," Hakyeon tells him.) There's a lady on the new bus Taekwoon rides to his job at the library with a baby that constantly cries, but when he covers his ears everyone gives him dirty looks. There's the new carpeting in the library that looks all wrong, there's Hakyeon's haircut that's too short and different, there's all the unpacking they still haven't gotten to.

And there's the Chinese they order (they've gotten a lot of food delivered to them lately, because Taekwoon hasn't felt up to cooking and Hakyeon's attempts turn out inedible), Taekwoon asks for pork fried rice but they accidentally send chicken instead. It's not even that much of a big deal since he eats the chicken kind as well but it's still wrong and overwhelming. 

He crawls underneath the kitchen table and starts to cry. Hakyeon doesn't bother him, he knows not to, he just sits and eats quietly as Taekwoon does his crying. Crying isn't enough, so Taekwoon takes his fork and starts to stab at the floor, the underside of the table, the wall. He grabs a fortune cookie and crushes it inside its little packet, then another one. 

When Taekwoon throws the fork, he isn't aiming at anything in particular. It just happens to go to Hakyeon, who's now at the counter pouring himself more cola. The fork hits him in the mouth and he lets out a surprised shout, hand going to his face. Taekwoon screams loudly, because he didn't mean to do that, and he leaves his spot from underneath the table to lock himself up in the bathroom instead, crawling into the bathtub.

His fit calms down after a few moments He's tired and hungry and has a headache. He can hear someone knocking at their front door, and then Hakyeon answering it.

"Is everything okay over here?" Taekwoon knows who that voice belongs to, it's the neighbor that yelled at him for trespassing into her yard. He also knows what trespassing means now, because he Googled it. "I thought I heard screaming."

"Everything's fine," Hakyeon reassures her. "Taekwoon's just letting off steam." He says it so casually, like it's nothing eventhough Taekwoon has thrown a fork at him and hurt his lip. It makes Taekwoon's heart squeeze painfully.

"Oh," the neighbor answers. "Well, good thing I checked first. I was about to call the police." Taekwoon wonders what's up with her and the police.

"That's not necessary," Hakyeon says quickly. "We're all good. Thank you for the concern though."

The neighbor leaves after that. It's quiet again. Taekwoon sits in the bathtub a little while longer, repeatedly turning the shampoo bottle upside down and watching it run down to the bottom before turning it back up and letting it run again. When he gets bored of that, he decides to leave the bathroom to go eat his dinner.

The food's cold now, but Taekwoon doesn't feel like heating it up. He just wants to eat it fast so he can get to bed. The chicken fried rice is extra delicious, and he's actually kind of glad the Chinese place sent it instead of the pork kind. Now as he thinks back on it, it's ridiculous that he threw a fit over such a small thing. He can't believe that's what made him snap.

Hakyeon sits down at the table quietly next to him as he eats. Taekwoon can see his hand go up a few times, like he wants to touch Taekwoon, but puts it back down as he decides against it. Taekwoon lets him know it's okay to touch now by taking his hand himself and placing it on his head. Hakyeon laughs, and starts to pet him. It feels really nice.

"Are you alright?" Hakyeon asks him. Taekwoon thinks it's funny he's asking him that, when he's the one that got hit by a fork. There's a tiny red scratch on his lip where the fork hit, and it's swollen a bit. That really hurts Taekwoon to see that, and knowing that he was the one that caused it makes it even worse.

Hakyeon notices him staring. "It's fine," he says, his finger brushing over his lip. "It doesn't even hurt anymore."

Taekwoon isn't that convinced. It looks bad. "Sorry. It was an accident."

"I know, it's okay." Hakyeon removes his hand from Taekwoon's head and pats his cheek instead. "Don't worry about it."

Taekwoon tries not to worry, or think, about it but it's hard. He knows that everytime he looks at Hakyeon from now on, he's going to think about the time he threw a fork at him, along with all the other times he's hurt him due to his outbursts. He doesn't want that list to grow any bigger. He wants it to stop.

-

Taekwoon gets promoted to Assistant Librarian. That's the level under Head Librarian, he thinks, which is Joo's position. She tells him that once she retires, he'll be Head Librarian then. He doesn't want to think about Joo retiring. He probably wouldn't be a very good Head Librarian like she is.

He love his new Assistant Librarian job though. He gets paid more money. He gets to wear a shiny gold name tag with Assistant Librarian written on it, and he also gets to boss around the library employees that's under him now, like if he doesn't feel like putting a big stack of books back onto their shelves he can just pass it over to someone else and tell them to do it. Joo says not to do that with all the books though. Just every once in a while. 

Taekwoon also gets his own spinny office chair in Joo's office, and his own bead maze just like the one that's in the children's books section. He gets to go in her office, sit in his spinny chair, and play with the bead maze whenever he feels like he needs a break. He tries not to do that too much as well because he feels unproductive.

Sometimes he even gets to run personal errands for Joo, like go out during lunch and get her something to eat or answer her office telephone when it's someone she doesn't want to talk to. These things aren't included in his pay he gets every Friday, she pays him a little extra for them right out of pocket. 

Hakyeon is so excited for Taekwoon. He throws a mini party by buying a cheesecake and writing congratulations on it with chocolate sauce. He gives Taekwoon lots of kisses. Taekwoon can't help but notice the little white scar that's replaced the scratch on Hakyeon's lip. Taekwoon doesn't like that, but he tries to focus on the kissing instead. 

-

November gets here fast. It's a lot colder now, there's a bunch of nice crunchy leaves on the ground, and Taekwoon's birthday is in a few days. 

Taekwoon is going to be twenty-five. Hakyeon fake sobs about it. "We're so old," he says, but Taekwoon doesn't think they're that old. Fifty is old, and seventy and a hundred. ("We're halfway to fifty," Hakyeon tells him then, and then he does feel old.) 

When he was a child, Taekwoon never really understood birthdays. He didn't understand when people would tell him happy birthday, or why they were giving him cake and presents over it. In middle school, Hakyeon told him that his birthday was exactly how it sounded - his birth day, the day he was born on a certain year. People celebrate it because it's his special day, his birthday. But Taekwoon doesn't think it's all that special because he once saw someone on television with the same one as him.

("I thought it was my special day," he had said.

"Well, it is," Hakyeon answered, "but a lot of people share it. Everyone shares a birthday with someone. It doesn't make yours any less special though.")

Taekwoon doesn't has a lot of plans for his birthday this year. He's going to work, then play soccer and basketball with Se Il and Se Il's friends, and then eat cake with Hakyeon after dinner for dessert. The day after, him and Rin Hi are supposed to meet up at the library and she's going to give him her gift. They don't get to see each other often because she's so busy these days.

For some reason, near his birthday Taekwoon always start to think about his family. He wonders if they know it's his birthday, if they still remember it or how old he is. He looks at the picture in the bunny book and he feels really old then. He was just one month old there, now he's 300 months old. He knows that because he figured it out on the calculator.

Hakyeon wakes Taekwoon up on November 10th, his birthday, by singing. He sticks one of those pointy birthday hats on his head and leads him into the kitchen. There's microwavable waffles, because Hakyeon cannot cook. 

He gets his present at breakfast as well. It's a decent s