"I like you."

Was what stumbled on my lips two years ago after my very first drunk session, in celebration for winning as the secretary of the student council, with Kenneth- the vice captain of San Pablo's basketball team and adviser to the school's chess players (apparently he IS genius when it comes to chess but he refused to join the team that's why he became the adviser), the hottie whose almost half of the neighboring all-girl school has the eyes to, the favorites of female and male teachers eventhough half of his subjects were leaning towards failure, and my bestfriend whom I consider as my 'brother to a different mother'.

 

It was not my intention to say those words but believe me when you're drunk, your lips has their own mind. It will reveal anything that was hidden in the depths of your heart. It will cross you when you're vulnerable.

 

I was not able to immediately remember it the next day because of the intense headache I received. I woke up half and sprawled to the bare-chest of Ken whose snore created throbbing pain to my head. I stood weak and dizzy to the bathroom to relieve cramps I was feeling on my stomach. I guess my retching woke him up as I felt soothing hands on my neck, rubbing away some tension.

 

"Feel better?" he asked crouching on my side, his voice sound rough. I looked at him with a half-closed eye and grinned.

 

"I threw up on you, didn't I?" I said with my elbow on the toilet bowl supporting my head with my palm. It was making me a little dizzy but I had to . It was my first alcohol and I rewarded him with my vomit.

 

Ken stood and absentmindedly scratched his chest. "I had no choice. You're making a mess in my room." He walked out of the bathroom.

 

I closed my eyes and calmed my nerves before standing up and followed Ken to his closet. He rummaged in his clothes and handed my his spares and a towel. "Here. Go wash yourself." I looked at him in question and he understood. "I'll use Pa's bathroom. Go downstairs if you're done."

 

I nodded. Walking back to his bathroom, I dropped my clothes to the small table beside the shower stall and undressed my pajama...? I stilled. I opened the shower with questions lingering in my mind. Why was I in a pajama and not in my boxers? Did Ken took the initiative to remove all my clothes and replace it with a pajama I stashed in his closet? Did I threw up on myself too? Did I created a mess in his room?

 

I was into my deep thoughts that I was startled with a knock. "Kitten, still your furs?"

 

Kitten, his pet name only to Ken. Nobody dared to call me other than Kit-my nickname or Kisterson (dumb I know. My parents were not really into giving proper names. Mom said she adapted it on one of those indie films.) because they will definitely feel what a black belt holder can do. I punched Ken once when we were in 3rd grade (my mom was into learning Taekwondo after an incident I never remembered) but he never replaced it despite him receiving lots of kicks. Add it to the fact that I was damn allergic to fur. I was the first to wave my white flag.

 

"Shut up. I'm scrubbing myself because I can still smell that damn on me." I always wondered how the hell he can still smell so good when he showers like he's always in a hurry. "I do have a meeting today, you know." Meeting and minutes. After I said that word I sighed. Another boring budget meeting with the other club officers. Even when I was just the vice president of the dance club I already hated attending the meeting. It surely eats your soul when you explain why you need to have the exact budget you're asking for. "Hey, I'll borrow boxers, okay? I forgot to bring a spare." Since my clever mother Kasandra knew I was going to waste away, she asked (I always spent overnights at Ken's when I or Ken wanted to so I did not understand why she needed consent) Ken's parents if I could be buried at their house for the night. And nice person they are, they even allowed Ken to use the 'spare' car to bring me home alive. I will never know how rich Ken could be but sometimes with my low allowance he could be an advantage. Kenneth never once complained. And that is one of the reason why I lo-...

 

For the second time I stilled. Wait. What?

 

"Kitten, have you drowned?" The knob of the bathroom door was turning. "What's with you?" Ken was looking at me like I was confused. I was and Ken was freshly showered with his pants button still open while he was rubbing his head with a towel.

 

Flashes of me dancing with few y ladies at the stage, me looking at Ken enjoying his night with his latest girl, me being kissed by a drunk senior whose left was almost showing, me singing undoubtedly incomprehensible lyrics while staring at Ken making out with his girl, me waving goodbyes to all officers, non officers of the school and teachers who attended the yearly election of every club, me having a laugh with Ken on the car, me being dragged at the room by I guess- Mr. Romero, Ken's family chauffeur, me dragging Ken to dance with, me saying tons of appreciation to Ken while patting his cheeks, me having a sudden chest tightness I took hold of Ken in deep embrace, me saying 'I like you' before I literally vomited.

 

Oh . I shivered.

 

"Is something bothering you Kit?" I just noticed that the shower stopped and Ken was rubbing me clean with the towel he let me borrowed.

 

"Did I say something last night?" I looked at his expression and undoubtedly I saw something I could not explain. "Ken?"

 

He shook his head and smiled. "You were out so bad you did say something. And I appreciate it even if its your drunk mind was speaking." He ruffled my hair and grinned. "Dress up fast. Dad and mom are waiting for breakfast." He smiled and went out leaving me in my thoughts.

 

I feel my heart beating out of my chest and I placed my hand to calm it. The intense headache I was feeling earlier was replaced by a great pounding of my chest. Ken rubbed it off as friendship. He...

 

I exhaled loud. Everyone knows I very much dig ladies, only I did not know when I started feeling different with Ken. I thought it was idolatry which he earned to every student. I am not gay and will never be. I will always chase ladies in short skirts and shorts with nice legs and pretty face. Until when I will do it? Till I forget the fact I kissed Ken while he was sleeping.

 

I was only glad that day was literally forgotten or else Ken would be awkward, right? Right now though I was making out with Alison, my latest girlfriend at the bench outside my school trying to ease my tension from tons of paperwork to file, the headache I was feeling for the upcoming dance festival on which I was assigned by the headmaster to lead on, and to forget seeing Ken groping and kissing his 2 year steady girlfriend at the car.

 

'I have to stop and control myself. I have to diverse or I might not forgive myself.' I told myself repeatedly while I clutched at my eyeglasses while I indulge myself with Aly's sweet mouth.