myungsoo centric ( myungyeol ) : bad
summary : the edge is so close but the heat is closer.
psychological-ish

Myungsoo was good.

With a big heart he carried in his chest ever so proudly, with the kindness displayed in every action, with the mind preoccupied with others and thoughts dedicated to helping those in need.

He watches.

Dark spheres take in the surroundings, the light is faint and encased by the clouds floating in the air, Myungsoo glances down, colourful streets living just as if he didn’t. They are vibrant, a sea of people strolls copiously and he wonders, contemplates on the possibility of being taken by the tide – swimming, moving his limbs helplessly only to drown, to be devoured. He’s a few steps away, he’s safe though his mind is on the edge.

His eye twitches.

Slender fingers aquiver nervously by reflex and the breath being taken is sharp. Thoughts crawl towards the cliff, hands reaching out nostalgically. They yearn for liberty – desperate, heartrending, stubborn. He’s alone though there is a voice whispering to the back of his ear.

“Myungsoo, what are you waiting for?”

It’s sickeningly sweet and he feels nauseous. A wicked grin is flashed before his eyes before they flicker to his palm. And despite wearing gloves, his skin feels dirty and his hands are cold.

Bathed in the darkness of the velveteen navy sky, red drops shine and illuminate the scene. They’re bright, too bright, they’re like an acid burning down the layers of his skin and the knife, upon meeting the surface on which Myungsoo stands, makes a single, too audible thud.

“Good job”

Words rumble in his head, he can almost feel the sensation of coming back home and urgently, black orbs search for the edge. For a moment, the heat Myungsoo feels when seeing Sungyeol injuries his heart.

He only wants to see a smile, the most minuscule curl of the lips, the satisfaction hidden behind Sungyeol’s – visage, words, actions.
Myungsoo only wants to help.

A heart too big weights in his chest, it beats too slowly.

( He can barely hear it )

The leftovers of his kindness don’t even try holding onto him.

( He’s pathetic )

His mind is preoccupied with others.

( It’s Sungyeol )

He has realised.

( He needs help )

Myungsoo is bad.