“Bang Yongguk.” Himchan demanded, his voice as shrill as the cold wind soon as Yongguk stepped into their bedroom. He was tired and he wanted to sleep, and it wasn’t every day that he could go to bed at nine PM. He tried not to answer Himchan and move past, but Himchan caught his wrist in a tight grip, Yongguk nearly whimpered.

“What the hell?” He cursed, genuinely surprised by the amount of pressure Himchan put into gripping his hand. It didn’t stop at that. Himchan pulled him forward, and pulled out the locker of Yongguks table – and crossed his hands.

“What’s all this?” He demanded an answer; and Yongguk avoided meeting his eyes. He once again, tried to avoid Himchan and get out of the room filled with his music sheets to their bedroom, but Himchan wasn’t going to let him past.

He caught Yongguk by his shoulder, and dragged him back. He locked the room with the two of them inside, and took the key to his hand.
“You’re not leaving until you explain what’s all this.” He said, his words final. Sighing, Yongguk passed Himchan bumping his shoulder on Himchans and got to his chair, and sat down, rubbing his forehead.

“What’s there to explain in sleeping pills?” Yongguk asked, closing his locker. Himchan blinked his eyes in disbelief, and huffed, crossing his hands.

“Do you think we’re all idiots? How did you plan to explain yourself if our maknaes found these instead? How would you explain this to Youngjae or Junhong?” He asked, and Yongguk hung his shoulders, and kept hiding his face trying to rub his forehead.

“Himchan please, I’m tired – and I have lot of work tomorrow.” Yongguk tried to excuse himself, and the least expected came from Himchan.

A soft sob.

His hands were no longer defensively crossed over his chest, but were pressing down on his cheeks, trying to stop himself from falling into tears. Yongguk felt alarmed, but he wasn’t sure what’s to be done.
“Himchan, stop. You’re taking this too far.” Yongguk warned, and Himchan nodded subtly, agreeing. “I know. I’m sorry.” He apologized, his voice slightly shaky.

He gulped, and rubbed his cheeks, composing himself despite the tears pricking his eyes.

“But do you know what worries me the most?” He asked, and Yongguk waited for Himchan to say. “It’s the fact that you’re not even bothered the slightest.” He confessed. A clear tear left rolling down his cheek, but he was quick to wipe it away.
“Why aren’t you?” He asked, his face now a mess, ears burning red.
“I’m worried about you, you know? We all are. Why aren’t you? Why are there sleeping pills in your locker when you shouldn’t? This dosage isn’t legal if you don’t have it approved by a physiatrist, Yongguk.” Himchan said matter of factly.

“Why aren’t you the slightest bothered?” He asked, and upon receiving no answer, sighed as final. He unlocked the door – and left. “You should be.” He mumbled as he did leave, and left Yongguks mind running through an endless tunnel of thoughts. When he finally decided enough is enough, he found his way back to their room, lights .

He flipped it off, and Himchan didn’t complain.

“Are you awake?” Yongguk asked, minutes later after he lied down on his share of the bed. After a long pause, Himchan breathed in, and said that he was.

Yongguk decided no more secrets.

“You’re right. I could say they’re illegal. I don’t have a physiatrist’s letter of approval of that dosage.” He confessed, and Himchan turned in his bed, facing Yongguk. He couldn’t see Yongguks face, but their gazes had met and they both felt it.

Himchan was silent for the longest while. He expected Yongguk to say more; and soon – he did.

“I got it through my brother.” He confessed. “I couldn’t sleep for the past few months and in case I didn’t want to collapse on stage, something had to be done.” He said.

Himchan nodded.
“Is it because of the contract reviewing?” he asked, and Yongguk sighed.

“I haven’t told them yet, but – the only way out is a media controversy.” Yongguk said. “At least that’s what it’s going to come to.”

“A controversy?” Himchan raised a brow; and Yongguk hummed.

“Manipulation, one could say.” Yongguk further clarified.

“As in we reveal what’s been happening?” Himchan asked followed by a gasp, and Yongguk hummed.

“Just thinking about it was a lot.” Yongguk confessed, and Himchan sighed. He reached over and put his hand over Yongguks waist and tried to tickle. Yongguk wasn’t in the mood, but he didn’t push Himchan away. “You could have told me.” Himchan said, and Yongguk laughed, Himchan hitting a spot.

“We were both having it rough.” Yongguk admitted, after his chuckling stopped. “You were taking care of the boys all the time and I was never here.”

“Stupid.” Himchan flicked Yongguks head, and chuckled.
“Don’t ever say that.” He pressed on Yongguks stomach.
“You were always here. We’re always here too.” He promised in a smile.

Just like that, Yongguk was forgiven. 

Yongguk put Himchans hand back from his stomach, and smiled in the darkness. "I don't want the maknaes to know." He said, and Himchan hummed, his voice sleepy, and mind somewhat at peace. "Throw it away." He replied the easiest, but Yongguk was reluctant. "But..." he started, but Himchan cut him off. 

"I'm getting my allowance tomorrow and I'm going to buy you Ginseng. I know what to give you for dinner to get you sleepy so just open the fridge next time instead of a bottle of pills when you come back from the studio, okay?" Himchan said, and Yongguk let himself smile, lips spreading wide.

It's been a while since he had found himself in a wide smile as he had now. "And I would rather you sneak a bottle of Wine over crap tablets." Himchan rolled his eyes, and turned over. "Stupid Bbang" He said, and wished a good night. Although Yongguk didn't find it entirely in himself to fall asleep straight away as Himchan did, it did find the way.

He closed his eyes; and repeated their promise.
All of us.

-

AN:
This one is for everyone,
My first public fic in Asianfanfics.
Upvote if it's worth it.