Lay the Unicorn gets more than what he bargained for when he becomes a timelord's apprentice; he had assumed that he was signing up for a lovely, tropical holiday travelling through time and space in the Tardis, and had even brought his horn accommodating sun hat and shades! However, his expectations were so far from the reality he had envisaged, Infinite would be disappointed: he was now bound inexplicably, not to his reclining sun chair as he had expected, but to a timey wimey generator, a tea machine, and two insane timelord divas whom seem to communicate through high pitched giggling and squealing… Needless to say, Lay is impressed.

However, he cannot for the life of him comprehend why his new boss likes to refer to himself as "The Doctor" when he has neither a doctor's license nor a PHD, but the fact that The Doctor now has the weirdest companions he has ever had the pleasure of entertaining, companions who constantly lure idols from a mysterious planet called Earth into a diva den to party with 69/7, is a bit too much for Lay to handle. These fellow timelords of The Doctor’s from the planet of Gallifrey, Saffron and Swara really do put the capital S in shenanigans. Lay had thought that they were adorable little cherubs and was delighted to accept their party invitation, supposedly to ‘the most perfab party of the century’, until he ended up being a server - he would never be able to either trust anyone, or entrust himself to anyone ever again after what happened with a devilishly handsome stranger in a certain corner of the diva den… It seemed he had finally found out what ‘Netflix and Chill’ really meant. Granted, he had thought it was an odd request when there was a perfabulous party in full swing in the room just next door...

Maybe it had been the sugar lumps that Saffron had fed him under the disco ball or the sweet smell of the diary that Swara had slid across the table towards him but ever since the first and last timelord party Lay had attended, he hadn't been himself. Crashing the Tardis into dustbins, flirting with The Doctor and getting clawed by Saffron and Swara for it and frustratedly writing about a certain alien in his diary, Lay is pretty much the derpiest derp that could ever derp. Not that he particularly minds; as long as he gets to spend quality time in his dreams with his one true love, the Sandman, allowing his subconscious mind to guide him in his desires, he's happy... Or so he thinks~

Locate all the Infinite references; go on. I dare you- ~(e u e~) ~ Swara

          ​

WARNING: May contain idol-napping, excessive dubcon partaying of those kidnapped idols, deranged ideals, obnoxious eye-twitching, corny references to anything and everything K-Pop, timelord diva perfabness beyond the comprehension of mere mortals, infuriating David Tennant references, Daesung's abs, hyperventilating, flailing about, tangled hairflips, Kitten!Tao, Korean mountain hideouts, tea, digestive biscuits, jam donuts, buttered crumpets, annoying references to historical novels of all genres, timelord dictionaries because normal ones are too mainstream, excessive smirkling, evil laughter, magical ships that shall never sink, copious Swaffron and last but not least, Gollum-like behaviour.