Pairing : Doojoon/Yoseob

songs : hello (huh gak), Haru haru (Big Bang), blue tomorrow (SUJU)

, angst

I Love him so much..

“why did you ever bring that Cat into the house..??..you’re just messed up..!!” ah..here we go again, Yoseob why did he always be the one who nag and scold in our home.

“come on Yoseob, look at that Cat, are you didn’t care about it..??” I asked him, Yoseob pouted and give a death glare to that cat.

“I don’t like cat..and you know it..bring that cat out..” he shouted at me as he stomped his way to the bedroom, I sighed.

“hy little kitty..don’t worry about him okay..” I smiled at that cat.

Love can you describe it..

“yah.. don’t come near me, You’re so ugly..I hate you” again, my heart was hurt, everytime he try to ignore me, look like I invisible, why he can stop hurting me.

Can you see me baby..I’m dying and not alive..

“can you stop smiling like a stupid..I hate your smile..” Yoseob hissed and turn away, I took a deep breath and try to smile, the more I love him.. the more I hurt because of him.

You're the person that used to love me

“I’m home..” I said, I walk toward my and Yoseob door, but I immediately stop when my ears heard a loud from the bedroom, my hand was shaking as I push the door carefully, Yoseob was kissing with a guy, , he noticed me and push that guy away from him.

My heart stopped beating.. you said you love me.. but why you keep hurting me.. why you lie to me..

“doojoonie..you’re here..” he said, I nod and looked at that guy beside him.

“so can you closed that door for me..I’m busy..” yoseob said coldly, I  nod again, and closed that door.

My tears run down my cheeks, I touched my chest.

“its hurt..really..really hurt..” I whispers, look..he prefer that guy than me, his boyfriend.

“There’s must be a reason.” I whispered again, try to calm my self, I know..I’m a stupid, he was cheating infront me and pretended nothing had happened..

I know, I can just leave him alone.. but everytime I want to leave him..

“Don’t leave me…Doojoonie..I’m sorry..please come back to me”

that’s words.. I can’t leave him, I don’t want to make him cry.

I can stay beside him though he hurting me again and again, I can handle it because I loved him…

I want to go back to the time when we didn't know each other

I smiled and lying my body in the grass staring at the sky,  I touched the air.. and try to holding back my tears.

“yoseob..you’re so bad..you hurting me until I can’t breath..”

”If it was going to end like this...If this is really the end.....” I whispers, my throat felt so hurt.

This is where everything ended

“joonie..where are you..” ah..I can hear you.. are you trying to looking for me..??

“DooJoonie…where…DOOJOON..!!” you found me.. I hear he run toward me, and hug my body.

“doojoonie..wake up..whats wrong…why your hands bleeding..are you cut yourself…Doojoon wake up..Don't....”

can I..??, are you crying now..??,

but.. I don’t want to wake up, if I open my eyes, you’ll hurting me again..

my hand was hurt..but my heart more hurt.

“Joonie.. please..don’t leave me..”

No..seobie.. I don’t leave you.. I just want to be invisible to you.

“I’m sorry..open your eyes..”

sorry..you not sorry…plese stop crying…

“no.. don’t leave me.. why you do this.. I’m sorry..”

Ah..I’m tired can I sleep now..??.

“doojoonie… I’m sorry..I love you..”

Love.. how much I want to hear it from your lips.. and I can hear it now..

“Don’t leave me..how can I life if you not in here beside me..”

I’m here beside you..but you still ignore me..you can survive although I’m not beside you.. for you I’m nothing.

“please..joonie…wake up.. please don't do this to me…I’m sorry”

Regret..its too late.. I want to says: Good bye.. but I’m too tired.

“Doo..I’m sorry..I love you…you’re the best I ever had…”

Am I the best..?? so why you keep playing with my heart…??

If I’m the best you ever had…to me… you’re the best I never had.