Min Yoongi:

Pessimist, a person who hates new years - not only the celebration part but the fact there will be 365 more awful and miserable days he needs to go through and all that for what? Nothing. When in the end he will, like everyone else, die.

Kim Seokjin:

Optimist, a person who loves new years - not only the celebration part but the fact there will be 365 more beautiful and wonderful days he needs to spend like they're his last moments on Earth.

Yoongi throws away his days while Seokjin begs for more.

To say that Yoongi was shocked when he got a call from his childhood friend would be an understatement. The call itself was awkward and rushed; Hoseok inviting Yoongi to his New Year party and Yoongi answering with an 'uhm sure'.

And when that day came around it was normal as any other day in Yoongi’s life. Maybe it was even a day he hated the most. At around eight pm, with no will whatsoever, he put on black skinny jeans and his favourite grey sweater and made his way to another six hours of smiling politely at strangers and making small talk.

It took him a little more time to find Hoseok’s house since he hasn’t been in that part of a town for a long time. Outside is was really cold but he loved it, it suits his mood pretty well.

He knocked once and immediately heard a loud ‘come in’ and he did as told. The house hasn’t changed except now Hoseok was the only one living there. Yoongi looks around the walls that were filled with childhood memories (somewhere in the middle was a framed picture of them on their first day of school) Hoseok brought him out of his thoughts as he entered the room preparing everything for the night.

-You’re the first one that came. I’m pretty surprised.-

-Well you said to come after eight, and I just...-

- Yes, yes, I know, so how’s life.-

-Good, you?-

- Well, since we haven’t seen each other for a long time I have so many things to…-

The knock on the door cut their conversation and then a group of people came in, some that Yoongi knew and some not.

Time went by slow. Yoongi was sitting, most of the time alone, except when he was dragged from one person to another - them being Hoseok’s coworkers - and the hyper friend was ecstatic to introduce them to Yoongi. But just when the clock was about to strike midnight, his blood was almost all alcohol and it felt really bad in his stomach. He went to the toilet just to get out of the crowd a little but he wasn’t feeling any better and the worst was when he came out of the bathroom. He just wanted to collapse on the couch but someone, some really good-looking man, was already sitting there and that was the last he remembers before throwing up on that person, by accident and then everything went black.

Strong pain in his head was what Yoongi woke up to. There was a wet towel on his head and Aspirin on the night desk. He found himself in a stranger’s bed and that was rare to happen. He heard a voice somewhere in the house and it lead him to the kitchen. The pretty man from the party was talking to someone on the phone wishing ‘Happy New Year!’ and that stuff. Yoongi couldn’t proceed in his head how he ended here; anyway he planned to find that out as soon as the tall man stops talking.

-Oh, you’re awake, I’m sorry if I woke you up it was my mom calling and you know how they just can’t stop talk…-

-Who even are you?-

-Oh, I’m so sorry, my name is Kim Seok Jin, but you can call me Jin.-

Seokjin said with a wide smile on his face. He was very tall and skinny but not as much as Yoongi was. He looked pretty tired and Yoongi was surprised that he wasn’t sleeping since it was three in the morning. His hair was some darker shade of brown and it was styled nicely. He was wearing an over-sized sweater that showed one of his pale shoulders and skinny jeans. Yoongi caught himself staring at the new met man.

-Uhm, my name is Yoongi.-

-Nice to meet you, you’re probably wondering why you are here. Well we were at that party of Hoseok and I was just calmly sitting on the couch when you came out of nowhere and..  uhm.. you threw up on me. But it’s okay, I realized you were drunk and you out the next second and nobody knew where you live so I thought it would be best if you slept over at my house. Now that I say that it sounds really wrong but don’t worry I just took you to bed nothing more.-

Yoongi just stared blankly at the man that was talking and talking like there is no end. His headache wasn’t helping him to clear his mind nor did it help when it was his turn to say something.

-Oh god, I’m really sorry I was totally drunk and oh, I’m so sorry.-

-Don’t worry, it’s okay.-

-Can I use bathroom for a moment?-

-Yes, of course, first door to the left.-

-Thank you.-

And their conversation ended there.

When Yoongi stepped out of Jin’s house he was still quite dizzy. The sun was still low and sky had that color of orange and blue mixed on the horizon. Everything was quiet and the only sound that filled the cool air was the sound of Yoongi's shoes squeaking against the snow. He walked slowly thinking about Jin, about life, but mostly about Jin.

*A few minutes earlier, while Yoongi was in the bathroom*

He splashed water on his face and looked at himself in the mirror. In front of him was a lost boy looking like he’s dead. Maybe the constant depression is what made him look so pale and lifeless. He stayed like that, leaning on the sink when something caught his eye. Behind him, on a small shelf, were at least ten bottles of pills, all of different kind. He took one bottle and went straight to Jin.

-What is this?-

He felt something burning in his chest and he blamed it on the drunken state he was in earlier.

-That’s a bottle of pills I bought for my friend who is sick.-

-Oh, I’m sorry but you have much medicine in your bathroom.-

 -You never know when you’ll need something.-

Jin said still smiling so widely and bright. Yoongi hated his giggly personality but there was something special about Jin that made Yoongi calm and relieved.

That morning, when Yoongi got home, he just couldn’t sleep; it was almost six in the morning and at seven he already had to go to the studio to meet Namjoon so they could work on some mixtape they’re making. He felt so empty. He wasn’t sad or happy, and he hated when it’s like that. He can’t feel anything. But what he hated more was the fact that he still hasn’t got used to it.

The phone rang informing Yoongi that he has a text message.

From: Jin

I know you just got home but I wanted to ask you if you would like to go with me to Hoseok’s house to help him clean up if you don’t have plans for today. : )

And that day instead of going to the studio like any other day, Yoongi found himself in the kitchen of his childhood friend, shirt wet because he and Jin got in the water fight while cleaning dishes. It wasn’t long until Hoseok gave in to and in the end room was in an even bigger mess than it was before. After that all three of them sat in Hoseok’s living room in silence before Jin started laughing out of nowhere followed by Hoseok and in another second the whole room was filled with loud laughing to the tears. It was surprising for Yoongi who never smiled, but now when he was here with Jin something made him way too happy.

After a few minutes, Hoseok asked Jin to come with him and they left Yoongi as they entered another room, though he was still able to hear them. Their voices were a little above a whisper and Yoongi couldn’t quite understand everything but when he got home those five words he just didn’t want to leave his head. It’s getting worst and Bart syndrome.

The next day he met with Hoseok again because Jin invited them to have lunch at his house.

They were sitting at the table when a loud breaking sound came from the kitchen where Jin was. Hoseok got up before Yoongi and was already helping the older boy to stand up.

-What happened? Jin are you okay?-

Yoongi panicked.

-Don’t worry, I’m fine, my legs just don’t want to listen to me. I’m sorry.-

And in that moment, Yoongi felt like something is tightening around his chest stopping him from breathing.

It was a nice afternoon but Hoseok had to leave early because he had so much work to do. Yoongi stayed until late night hours.

-Yoongi, if you want you can sleep over, look it’s snowing so hard outside and it’s probably freezing; you can stay and we’ll have tea.-

-Jin, I-I-I would like to but… you know I don’t want to be a bother and…-

-Oh, please it’s fine I would like to have someone keep me company anyway.-   

And so Yoongi stayed. And he stayed almost every other night with Jin. Sometimes they would go to some restaurant or café. Sometimes they would take long walks, or wander around Seoul. And with every passing second they grew closer. And now Yoongi didn’t have even a small doubt. He was sure. He knew he’s falling for the wrong person but he couldn’t care less.

It felt like Yoongi finally found a light to guide him. Something to live for. He still had those grey days when he just wanted to disappear but Jin’s smile was enough to bring colours to Yoongi’s world. They were absolutely different. But somehow, together they were perfect.

And Jin wasn’t alone anymore. Yes, before he had Hoseok, but he never had friend like Yoongi. Besides, Hoseok was his personal doctor. Those nights he spent with Yoongi, sipping on hot tea as they shared funny stories, or watched some movie, were the most beautiful he had in his life. And, oh, how much he loves that smile that Yoongi saves just for him, because the younger boy never smiles. So Jin would be lying if he said he didn’t like Yoongi in ‘more than just a friend’ way. 

But life is rough and we had to make it even worse as we split it into days, hours, seconds… So what happens when you fall for a person whose days are numbered?

It was a night when neither of them felt like going home.

They were together, lying in silence doing nothing. The room was dark and Yoongi thought Jin was asleep by now.

-Yoongi…-

Jin said so softly, his voice cracking a little. Yoongi loved how his name sounded against Jin’s lips.

-Hmm?-

-I think… actually I know that… I…Love…You…-

Yoongi was always afraid of those three words with so much meaning behind them. He was afraid because he was never sure what love is. But now, as he lied in bed with Jin’s head on his shoulder their hands locked together and bodies pressed close to keep themselves warm, it was so simple. And maybe he found the meaning of that four letter word, and he can definitely say the same to Jin.

-I love you too.-

People say that the most beautiful moments in life don’t last long. And love lives forever.

-Yoongi, I’m dying.-

And somehow Yoongi knew that already. But he was throwing it away thinking it’ll just disappear. No. It can’t be happening.

-How much time do we have?-

-Hoseok said I have a few more weeks but I know it’s time to go.-

So what does being alive means? When your heart is beating and your lungs filter air, does that mean that you’re living? When you can’t control your own body. Can’t move. Then what?

That’s how Jin’s next weeks were supposed to be. The days he thought would be the worst. Something that scared him the most…thinking he’d be alone with no one to hold his hand when time comes for the lights to go out. But now he wasn’t scared, not even a little.

Monday started off with so much pain. But Yoongi was there. Next to Jin. Yoongi prepared them some breakfast they ate in bed. If it was any other Monday, Yoongi would probably be in the studio or somewhere with Namjoon just to make his time pass by faster. But today he stayed with Jin silently begging for seconds to go by slower. Just to hold Jin’s hand longer.

On Tuesday Hoseok came to visit Jin, giving him some medicine. The older one never told how he was feeling, but Yoongi knew how much pain he was in. He knew Jin was tired and it made his heart hurt seeing how his hyung moved so slowly even though they went for a long walk in the snowing night. Because if not now then when. Their future was already written down. And Yoongi would give everything to stop time. Just to talk to Jin longer.

Wednesday started off very early. Jin was woken up by soft music playing and an aroma of hot tea filling the room. Yoongi was already dressed up, sitting on his side of bed Jin’s cheek. His hand was so warm against the other’s pale and lifeless skin. Jin tried to reach out for Yoongi’s hand but it took so much more effort, making it almost impossible for Jin to move. And even when Hoseok stopped by later to deliver Jin a wheelchair, Jin still had bright smile across his face laughing at all the lame jokes Hoseok told. And Yoongi, he watched as the sun went down and how another day was torn from Jin’s life, but he smiled even if all he wanted to do was to cry. Now he just couldn’t sleep. He would give his entire life just to see Jin smile longer.

Thursday was the day Jin was moved to the hospital to a small white room but Yoongi was still there. It was the 2^nd of December and they were planning where they’re going for Christmas. Yoongi wanted to see America but Jin couldn’t go that far. On that day he just wanted to watch fireworks with Yoongi, here in Seoul, as they drink tea and everyone’s smiling with small snowflakes filling the cold air. And right then, Yoongi felt like his life was firework. And Jin was the light that made it all so shining and beautiful but it’s over so soon and the brightness is disappearing into the night. It’s killing him because he can’t bring it back just to see the light in Jin’s eyes longer.

So on Friday he took Jin to the highest building in Seoul and, with a little help from Namjoon and Hoseok, that night they spent watching firework and drinking hot tea, not saying much just holding each other tight. And when the show was over, even though it was still the 3^rd of December, they said ‘Happy birthday!’ to Jin as he blew candles on a small chocolate cake and Yoongi kissed him while everyone was smiling.

It was all because Jin never made it to the 4^th of December. He never made it to Christmas he was planning with the person he loved. And on Friday, Yoongi hated life like never before just wishing he could have Jin by his side again.

But everything that’s beautiful doesn’t last long and love lives forever.