And here she stood, in front of the club they frequented for their Friday night outs. For almost eight years, with college friends, they’ve hung out at several lounges, however, this place was more memorable for her. It was where they became official seven years ago, and also where her heart was torn and confused when he introduced the woman, who is now his fiancée, to their friends. She sighed once again, before taking the courage to step into the club.

With heavy steps, she went upstairs and towards the tables they occupied most of the time, and there he was, with a huge grin on his face, happily receiving congratulatory shots. And for the millionth time, she could only regret her rash decisions five years ago, when she chose to let go and pursue other priorities.

“Hey, sorry I am late…” she forced a smile as she approached their friends. “What did I miss?” she asked.

“Hello there, Ms. Workaholic, more overtime at your office? Really, what’s the use of being the supervisor when you’re the one closing the whole company building?” SooYoung friend. “Anyways, you just missed Taec’s face getting caked, but saved yourself from a mushy sort of farewell speech from YuRi…”

She glanced at Taec and noticed some leftover white icings on his blue collared shirt, and smiled as she imagined the funny scene. She was thankful though that she was not able to hear YuRi, as she knew that she would surely have a breakdown at the thought of letting Taec go permanently. If YuRi got emotional over having a friend getting hitched, what more could a former girlfriend who actually has leftover feelings for the guy do.

“Fany-ah, you’re the only one left who had not given Taec a congratulatory message… the girls already did earlier and we guys have given our blessings last week at his bachelor’s party…” JunHo said as he handed a glass of champagne to the lady.

Fany smiled awkwardly as she got the glass from him. Talk about rubbing salt on the wound, she went wondering on how can JunHo have the nerve to ask that of her. And she remembered that she told nobody that her feeling for Taec came back three years ago and that she’s been slowly tortured every time she sees Taec having fun and being sweet to his fiancée. Even so, they all knew that they had a past, how can people expect much of her? Or did just everyone forget about her relationship with Taec, after he moved on with another woman?

“I already did when he told us he’s getting married…” Fany responded.

“That’s different… this time, be more sentimental… Hyung would be married next week, and who knows if he would get to see us as often as now… we don’t know if hyungsunim would still let him out on clubs and such…” WooYoung urged her.

“Yah! ShinHye is not like that…” Taec looked like a fool drunk in love as he defended his fiancée. They’ve been together for almost three years and yet, he still looked smitten and so in love; like during the first few stages of a relationship. Fany felt bitter again, seeing him think of his fiancée.

“Well…” Fany started. 

All their eyes was now on her, waiting for her to speak and so was he. Taec was smiling at her, wanting to hear her say congratulations which to her are big fat lies. She smiled back at them and downed the glass in one shot. She thought for a few seconds before finally expressing her “happiness” on the event.

“First of all, congratulations again on the wedding… I’m happy for you… for you two… I know that she’s getting one of the world’s greatest man, and I know that your love would last until the ends of the earth… you’re gonna be the first one of us to get settled down, so I’m not sure how things would change… but I just hope that you won’t be too distant after getting married…” Fany gave a sincere smile though parts of her speech was half-hearted.

“Thank you Fany-ah… that really meant a lot for me…” Taec replied with a smile.

She was not happy for them, but there’s nothing else she could do, other than faking a smile and pretending to be okay with everything, not destroying the friendship that she wanted in the first place.

I thought I forgot about the remaining sadness
Being this anxious is probably saying
That I’m not over you yet, though I don’t wanna believe it

The friends then proceeded to have a fun time, they talked, laughed, drank and ate. Sometime later, a few of them hit the dance floor and jumped around to the DJ’s music. She was looking at him, and suddenly, he got a call and he immediately smiled upon seeing the caller ID. He sweetly answered the phone and all of the people remaining at the table knew that it was his ShinHye.

As he started talking on the phone despite the blazing music, some of the gang, particularly ChanSung and YuRi, were at Taec’s both sides, teasing him. Taec could just roll his eyes at the two drunk friends, and excused himself as he went to find a quieter place to talk. And with that, she chose to also excuse herself, and she walked towards the bar.

“A glass of margarita please…” she told the bartender as she occupied one of the stools. Slowly, her drinks become heavier, as she ended up ordering a full bottle of tequila. As she drowned herself in alcohol, she was also drowned in her memories.

I don’t think I erased you from inside of me
I might have treated you more coldly
Because I might end up looking for you
But now I regret it, why am I like this?

They were all classmates in college and they quickly became a gang of friends. She, Taec, MinJun, Khun, Woo, JunHo, Chan, TaeYeon, YuRi, SeYoung, Yubi and Soo, they all shared common interests, however, she clicked the most with Taec. Soon after, he courted her and they became a couple. They shared sweet moments during their first few months and things went serious for the succeeding year.

One day, TaeYeon and YuRi told her that they saw Taec buying a ring at a mall. She told them that it couldn’t be what they were thinking – that he was going to propose to her at their young age. However, she could not completely shake off the thought as they were indeed serious as a couple, and who knew what was going on Taec’s mind. They were barely college graduates and she was not ready for it, and she was afraid of it happening.

While he was away in the rest room, she sneaked into his backpack and there she saw what the two girls were talking about. There was a black box, just the right size for a ring. She opened it, and saw that it was indeed a ring, a silver ring with a diamond stud, to be exact, and out of curiosity, she tried it on. It was the right fit and she was awed for a few seconds before quickly taking it off. All of a sudden, she felt bothered, she was unsure, she was terrified of this relationship, and on what would happen next.

When he came back into the room, she already disappeared. He called her as he worried on what could have happened. And after a few tries, she picked up telling him that she just felt unwell, that it was that time of the month. As she dropped the call, he was relieved a little, not knowing what would happen the day after.

The next morning, she told him that they needed to talk. And they decided to meet up at a rooftop garden café, and he thought that it was also a good time to give her the surprise. He thought that everything in their relationship was going smoothly, however, that night, she broke up with him. She offered no clear explanation on her decision, just saying that she was scared, that she felt that things are going too fast. He asked her to stay as he promised to take things slower, as she wanted, but she refused to, like she was already traumatized. After a year and five months, their love ended, and a friendship was forcefully mended as she asked of him.

She left hurriedly, covering her face, not wanting him to see that she was also hurting.  He was left there dumbfounded, not knowing where exactly he went wrong, thinking that loving her was the most important of all, but turns out, he was loving her too much. He didn’t realize that he was going too fast, only if she let him know. Here he thought, that it was the perfect night to give her a couple ring, but he ended up a single man. It was two months later that he was able to dispose of the couple rings, selling it to a family friend.

Though he had a lot of questions on his mind, he did not ask her, as he knew that she was still scared and that she would have a difficult time answering. Their friends were alarmed of the news, but asked no further as this was a sensitive topic for the ex-couple. They knew that if Taec and Fany wanted to let them know, they would speak up on their own. And slowly, their relationship was buried and no one dared to open up the issue again, especially if Taec and Fany were there. None of them knew the real reason of the breakup, though there were a few hunches here and there, none asked the two for the truth.

After trying to avoid each other for almost three months, things went back to status quo. They hung out like normal friends, however, unconsciously, the two never hung out without their other friends’ company.

It was after graduation and they were all in the middle of job searching, when she met this guy at a review school. They soon started dating, and after only three months, she was single again. She felt that dating was not matched with her at the time, and set her priorities at her dream job. She worked hard going in various job expos, attending seminars to improve her portfolio, applying in many companies in Korea. She never knew that it would be Taec to help her be at the starting step to her dream job. It was at that time that she realized what great man she had just given up, but her feeling for him had not relived just yet.

I don’t think I can do what I did for you before
It seems like you would just hate me and end things
That’s what I was afraid of, if only things could stop right now

All of them had different professional lives, some of the boys had their military training early on, and as time passed, their gatherings slowly lessened, and people started missing out on weekly hangouts. So, it came to a surprise to almost everyone, except Khun, when a woman they had not known was at the surprise birthday party they threw for Taec at Club Octagon. Khun introduced the woman as Park ShinHye, but did not mention who she was in their lives. This left almost everyone intrigued, especially Fany.

Taec thought that he would only be meeting the boys for a drink, so he did not expect to see the girls, and most importantly, ShinHye, to be at the same place. As soon as he saw them, the boys pulled the party poppers, while the ladies clapped for him. WooYoung and JunHo wanted to spray some champagne at the birthday boy, but were warned by Khun to behave as they had a special guest with them.

Their curiosities were answered when ShinHye walked towards him with a smile, and Taec returning with a wider smile. “Happy birthday, honey…” she spoke and he naturally enveloped her into a hug, continuing with a kiss on the lips.

“Thank you… I thought you were at home, you said that the surprise was there…” Taec whispered but was still heard by the people nearer to them.

Seeing this, Fany’s chest somehow felt tight and she could not explain how her body and mind was reacting to that scene. But her thoughts were shaken, when MinJun spoke up.

“Yah ChanSung-ah, can you see my goosebumps? Aigoo…” MinJun’s statement made everyone crack up.

“Everyone, this is Park ShinHye, my girlfriend…” Taec introduced as they sat down, and he also introduced his friends to her, with Fany being the last one introduced.

“He had told me little things about you all, and it’s nice finally putting a face on all the names…” she spoke. “Especially you Khun oppa…” she joked.

“Hyung, isn’t it a little unfair? It seems that you only talk with Khun hyung all this while…” JunHo spoke, feeling disappointed that only Khun knew about this.

“Not really… I just happened to spot them on a date last two months at Jeju… I was on a business trip, and they were actually on a vacation, not bothering to invite us or even bring some souvenirs for us…”

“I’m sure everyone was busy…” Taec scratched his head.

“Wouldn’t hurt to ask, oppa…” Yubi sided with JunHo.

“Would make sure that he asks you all next time…” ShinHye spoke and some gave her thumbs up, some cheered for her, as they were quite happy to s