“It was the best time of my life; youthfully and blissfully ignorant, unsure of the inevitable future, submissive and adventurous all at once. We didn’t know enough to properly understand each other. It was a mess. It was also the worst time of my life.”

—

Stretching after a nap is an almost indescribable feeling. The tension of limbs curling and bending to breaking point after remaining so stiff and still for such a long time, it was some kind of bliss. It made high pitched groans involuntarily sound from the back of Soojung’s throat and it made her back arch away from the hard ground, shoulder blades pressing into rocks and just baring it because it was worth it for the tingle that coursed through her tired body. Then there was a click. A click that made her go stiff and made the pain in her shoulders suddenly hurt more than it did a moment ago, it completely distracted her from that wonderful feeling and had her uncomfortable all at once.

Click.

“Are you taking photos of me?” she questioned, a sore whimper coming from her as she pushed up on her elbow and tossed hair out of her face to reveal a very disgruntled expression.

“Maybe?”

That boy was almost a devil’s incarnate. The way his lips curled into a smile; it never changed, it was always the same. His expression was untelling. Not cold, but not warm either. Soojung could never tell whether it were real or not, nor could anyone else for that matter. There was a reputation surrounding Taemin, he was called unsympathetic and distant, people had known his face as the face of ‘someone who was up to something’. Whether it were true or not, Soojung didn’t really know. But one thing is for sure, he’s mischievous- playful, rather. There’s always some glint of disobedience in his eyes.

“Give it back. Now.” Soojung growled, shifting to sit on her knees and not minding how the pebbles in the dirt left indents on bare knees. 

“I don’t think so.” Taemin smiled again, teeth baring and showing his laugh lines as a short chuckle left him.

Then came the struggle, Soojung swiping blindly in an attempt at her disposable camera but always near missing as it stayed in the clutches of Taemin’s bony hands. One more thing about being spawn of Satan, he loved to rub it in Soojung’s face just how much taller he was than her, holding the camera high above his head with that same grin plastered across his face. Unfortunately for him it doesn’t end up mattering how well he bests Soojung in height when with one fell movement she had scrambled to her feet and almost pushed him over with her efforts to pry the camera from his fingers. 

“Hah!” she grinned, giggles leaving her as she watched the boy’s expression completely change. “Oh- quit it."

His smile had fallen as he gazed up at her, his eyes empty and wide, lips only just parted and making him look utterly confused, defeated, even a little pathetic. But Soojung knew he meant none of it, you could call that his signature puppy dog look.

Soojung decided not to humour him this time, it wasn’t even convincing. The only truly convincing puppy dog face she knew belonged to Jongin, the third member of their party. 

“Quit teasing her.” came his cool voice, deep and relaxed and altogether sudden.

His appearance came as a break to the friendly atmosphere and made Soojung’s own smile falter just a little. The mood from just a moment ago was gone as if it had never happened. Not that it was all bad, Taemin stood and grinned at his best friend, no intention of apologising for the previous lolly gagging as he welcomed Jongin back from his bathroom break. 

Perhaps the atmosphere only changed for Soojung. Taemin still seemed unaffected.

He was a polar opposite of Taemin when it came to personality, emotion, and facial expression. Where Taemin lacked sincerity Jongin excelled. You could always tell how he was feeling; he never hid the obvious glint of jealousy or the thick-lipped pout that turned his face to a scowl. For Soojung, at least, it was obvious when he was upset, and it was obvious when he was happy. It was clear how he looked at her, it was the same lingering gaze that used to turn her cheeks rosy and make her heart swell. Now it just made her look the other direction.

“You took your time.” she stated coolly, a quick smile flashing at Jongin before she distracted herself with dusting the dirt off the back of her shorts and picking some stray blades of grass out of her hair- which Taemin quickly helped with.

“Are we heading back now?” Jongin questioned, a lopsided smile appearing as he stepped over and joined in picking grass and dirt out of Soojung’s hair. Taemin stopped then, tending to his own jeans and checking his watch for the time. His only answer was a nod and a small hum, and with that he had his heel and wandered to the rock path, gravel crunching underneath his steps as he lead the way back to the Chevrolet without even waiting.

And all was fine for just a moment, as Soojung made to walk past Jongin- but that serenity ended quickly with his fingers grasped tightly around her wrist. For just a split second her heart jumped, and her eyes were on Jongin, staring with her default blank expression, hiding just how she felt.

“Shotgun.” he grinned, breaking off into a sprint after he laid the initial distraction, even running past Taemin who just looked between the two, smiled, and carried on. 

“Hey- No!! You can’t call shotgun unless the car is in view, those are the rules!” Soojung called, running after him as his laughter echoed ahead of her and Taemin watched on.

—

“I knew their faces and I knew all of their expressions. They were familiar, whether I could work them all out or not. But they didn’t know mine. Maybe it was my own fault for keeping secret how I felt, or maybe it was just some sort of projection. One of them always thought I was okay, unaffected, emotions influenced by nothing. The other thought I hid everything away; that truthfully I was unstable and emotional, and he could see past that false veil he’d unknowingly created over me. They knew me as a version of themselves. They didn’t really know me. Maybe they even fell in love with someone else."