Chapter Nine

Find Yourself First

          Seul Ki could no longer stand seeing Mark. She doesn't hate him. Nor does she hate the girl. But it hurts when you realize that it's time for you to let go. The girl walked out of the room and gradually, her steps paced up until she was finally running through the corridors, gaining stares from every person she ran past, and unkind worrds from those whom she bumped into. But Seul Ki couldn't care less about what they think. The only thing she could see right now, was a blur. Every single thing was a blur as if her tears wanted to hide her from the world. She reached the hospital's exit easily and stepped out, still drowning in her tears which the sun tried to evapourate. 

         Nothing mattered at the moment. Like a runner that reached the finish line, Seul Ki slowed down her pace but did not stop moving forward. She walked past a white car that was parked, ignorantly. In no time, she reached the edge of the road unknowingly. Cars only zoomed past her. Trucks carrying heavy loads announced their presence. Ambulances made their way to the Emergency entrance of the building. Then, she took a step. She took a step forward. Now, she was completely standing on the scarred road. Seul Ki was about to make another step when she froze at the sound of a vehicle honking at her from a far. Just when her white converse's grip was carefully landing on the ground to bring her closer to the middle of the road, something grabbed her back. A hand. 

          She was pulled back into safety; someone's hand held her back tightly to press her tiny frame into that person's body. The other hand laid on her head. Seul Ki's world crashed down. She didn't care now. She didn't bother trying to escape the grip though it was quite tight. She had no energy left in her to do so. The precious yet shattered girl only had the power to cry into that person's chest now, while the said person could only scold her for her foolishness. 

"Do you want to die?! What's wrong with you?!" It was a man's voice. A very familiar voice that screamed worriedness. In fact, too familiar. But nothing could bother her. Nothing could take away the pain. No one could take away the pain. Seul Ki could only afford to cry. Nothing more, nothing less. "Never do that again..." The tone of the voice changed; it no longer showed anger, but displayed disappointment, concern, and... love. 

 

Inside the hospital...

"Why did Leo just run away like that?" Prinseung said out of concern. 

"You're brother is always full of surprises." Jae Hwan replied to her. 

"Always runnnig after her..." Hong Bin whispered softly for no one to even notice. 

"Let's just head over to the room. We're kinda late, you know?" Hak Yeon pointed out. 

"'Late' would be an understatement, hyung." Sang Hyuk butted in. "More like three days delayed." 

"Yeah, Seung. Let's go meet your 'savior'." Won Shik mimicked the way the girl always said the word and put an arm around her, dragging her away from the exit and into the hall way of rooms. 

         And off the friends went to her hero's room down the hall. Prinseung made herself clear to the boys, whom others thought to be her body guards, that she would be the only one entering the room, causing the boys to fill up all the blue chairs, that matched the theme of the hospital, lined up against the wall. She had barely laid a finger on the door knob when her phone started to buzz in her pocket, interupting the meeting of the two once again. 

"Yes, mom?" 

"Honey, are you guys on the way already?" Her mom sweetly asked. 

"Mom, i'm about to mee-" 

"Honey, get home soon. I really miss you, me and your dad." She pleaded to her daughter, and Prinseung couldn't resist.

"Arasso, we'll head home." She gave a defeated look to the boys, particularly Hong Bin and ended the call. 

"Let's go, guys." Hong Bin tapped Jae Hwan's knee who had already fallen asleep, and went directly beside Prinseung's long face. "Hey, we'll meet him soon, alright?" The girl only nodded and continued to walk out, further from the room.  

"Ah, right." Won Shik remembered something. "Seung-ah! Hyung messaged me. He's needed somewhere."

"Somewhere? Where 'somewhere?'" Hong Bin inquired, worriedly. But the older boy just shrugged. 

"Let's go home. I'll drive." Hak Yeon presented to drive. 

"Hyung, I don't think I want to die early." Sang Hyuk jested. And the eldest gave him a nice slap on the arm. 

 

"She's dead. But how come I still can't win him over?" Seul Ki was drunk. Pointing here and there, laughing out of nowhere for at least two minutes. While Leo just sat in front of her, having no idea how to comfort the girl he loves about being left by her own boyfriend, fiancee, to be exact. 

           Occasionally, a tear would slip out of her eyes and Taecwoon would have to wipe it off. Every now and then, Seul Ki would ask the old lady with a floral apron, for a bottle of Soju, but her companion would just give it back in the end even before she touches it. Taecwoon didn't know what to do. He could only stare at her at times when she'd ask him questions about her fiancee. It hurt him too. Every tear drop she wasted on that guy was like a bullet straight to his heart. If in anyway he could wipe all the pain away, he would. 

"I love him, you know?" Seul Ki was obliviously throwing arrows at Taecwoon now. She carried the shot glass that was filled with the rice alcohol and stared at it. "But maybe i'm the one who should let go." Now, Leo's pain was turned into confusion. "You know why?" She let out a bitter chuckle. "'Cause I was taught that real love is the one that's willing to sacrifice... Just for the other person to be happy." And finally drank the shot. 

"Enough." Taecwoon stopped her from pouring soju into the glass by holding her hand. "You're drunk. Give me that." He said, and took the alcohol away from her grasp and closer to him. 

"Why did I leave you, again?" Taecwoon's world stopped at this question and his gaze fell on her innocent eyes. "If I stayed with you, I wouldn't be drunk right now, would I be?" All the pain of yesterday suddenly came to him, all the pain that had taken him years to demolish. 

"You're drunk. There's no point in talking about this anymore. You're drunk. Come on, i'll drive you home." He blankly spoke. 

"I'm sorry." Leo was taken aback by the sudden apology. 

"You're drunk, let's go." He tried not to be swayed by her. She was drunk, that's all he thought. 

"No..." Seul Ki was crying. "I'm sorry... that I left you just like that...back then."

"It's done now. Let's just get you home." 

"I had no choice... Mom and dad. T-they.." Seul Ki was full of regret at the moment, but Taecwoon couldn't decide if her regret was brought by her being drunk over her fiancee-no more, or if it was really genuine. "You would've died...if i didn't leave." Seul Ki barely spoke in between her tears. 

"I would prefer dying but having you right beside me, Seul Ki-ah." He could remain silent no more. The happy moments, the memories, and the heart ache came to him in a flash. All of them. 

"But I didn't want that! You had so many dreams! You had your life ahead of you!" Her voice raised in an attempt to make a point. 

"My dreams? My dreams fell apart! You were all in of them! Remember when we were talking about having a family and a big house? Remember how I told you I wanted to be a pilot because I wanted to take you around the world?! You were in all of my dreams!" Tearsare unstoppable when its the heart that's hurting. His heart that was kept in the dark for so many years, finally let out the beast that hid in there. "You know what? You killed me anyway!" Seul Ki broke down even more when she heard those words. 

             Back then, Seul Ki thought that the best thing to do was to save Taecwoon. Back then, she thought that maybe he'd live a better life without her. Back then, she loved him so much that she had to let go. However, she didn't know that leaving him behind made his life miserable. Taecwoon at that time couldn;t focus at anything. When he went to school, he depended on his friends to make him smile but it somehow never worked. His grades fell from A* to D and C. At home, he had no choice but to plaster the fakest smile since his family didn't know about them. He had no one beside him to speak to. Life was hard. But through the long years, he learned to stand up again. But here she is, breaking those legs that Taecwoon had built to stand in front of her. 

"I'll just take you home. I don't want to talk about it."

"I love you." She countered Taecwoon. But he walked away closer to his car that was parked at least fifty meters away from the mini outdoor restaurant. 

 

 

"But you love him too."

 

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Sorry it took so long before I got to update, guys! Kinda really busy even thought its summer. Haha. Anyway, i'll try to update as much as possible! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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chickening
Sorry for the late updates guys! just really busy with studies xx

Comments

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mochilicious-
#1
Update soon~
mochilicious-
#2
UPDATE SOON~!
mochilicious-
#3
Chapter 21: Rereading the last chapter. LOL, Kim Yugyeom?
mochilicious-
#4
Chapter 21: Update soon! ♥♥♥
husunaglorymorning #5
Chapter 19: This is super amazing!!! Everything is tangled up and i cant even figure out who and how is going to start untangled it because taecwon is hesitating to help prinseung,jiyong is definitely up to something,mark is kept far away from her..And..why did they change her surname?why to mark she is dead?is dara and jiyong really not her parents and taecwon not her brother?but how come they know mark?please clarify this authornim...
mochilicious-
#6
Chapter 18: The pic's pretty epic. It's actually Mark kissing Jinyoung on the cheeks XD
mochilicious-
#7
Chapter 18: PLEASE UPDATE SOON!!!
I HOPE LEO TELLS HER!!!
BTW, nice edit :P
Update PLEASE!!!
MY FEELS ARE ABOUT TO EXPLODE!!!

♥♡♥♡
katcha #8
Chapter 14: OMG ITS INTENSE! GONNA GET DOWN! I hope she's remembers everything and HER FAMILY TELLS HER THE TRUTH! MARK GO AND GET YOUR GURL TOO!
mochilicious-
#9
Reading this story for the very first time [4:42am]