PJoon's jet black hair started to glister in the sun.

At least that's how I  saw it.

To Me Joon was perfect, and that's how I  liked it.

Ever since we started dating people had told me to leave Joon.

"If there's no connect in skin then you won't last long." My mother once told me , But since my mother was a drug addict, I  never listened to any of her advise.

I  could hear the sound of the train horn so I got up and stared at the sleeping body next to me.

" Joon?"  The said boy didn't budge.

 Gulping, I placed my hand onto the Joon's shirt.

Immediately Joon's eyes popped open and he grabbed my wrist, stopping me before I could actully touch his shirt.

" Oh sorry." Joon mumbled and let go, and lowered his head from embarrassment.

"Com'on the train's coming."  Joon grabbed  his bookbag and stood up.

we walked quietly back to Joon's house, not saying much since Joon hardly ever talked and I enjoyed taking quiet walks.

From the way I  saw it, we were perfect for eachother, even if  we couldn't touch eachother we still were in love.

" Are your parents home?" I  asked as Joon opened the front door.

Joon shook his head and tossed his bookbag across the wooden living room floor.

I took my homwork from inside of my bag and set it up on the tea table.

" Joon I'm hungry, make me some ramen!" I shouted to him even though he was already getting the pot ready.

I watched Joon for a while befor finally sitting back down and starting to do my homwork.

"I'm done." Joon sat and watched me as I did my homwork, as if was the most intresting thing in the world.

 I sometimes would try and flirt with him, but he would only return it with a smile.

 After a few hours we started watching a comedy about a woman who switched body with her boyfriend and went to start trouble in the city. At the end of the movie his father came home.

" What are you guys watching?" He asked plopping in between us.

 Joon rolled his eyes ." Com'on." He groaned waiting for me to get  up and follow him out the room.

"Are you coming to school tommorrow?" I asked as he handed me my bag, he simply nodded and bit his lower lip.

" I love you." I said and stared into his eyes for a respons.

 Joon nodded again before answering. " I love you too, now get home before your mother worries.' He laughed and pushed me out the door.

Joon always sent me away when his mother's new boyfriend came around,  when I asked him about it he just said that he didn't like him very much and  he just did't want me to be around him.

"I'm home." I whispered when I got home.

 My  mother's shoes weren't at the door, meaning she wasn't home.

 I sighed and just headed for my room since it was the only clean place in my apartment.

I wanted to leave  so bad but I was afraid that if I left my mother would hurt herself.

Lying down on my bed I started to remember the time where I had the courage to ask Joon to be my boyfreind.

Cheondong stared at Joon from across the blue colored classroom.

It was lunch time and like many other students, Cheondong perfered to stay inside and eat his lunch.

Well actually Cheondong only stayed inside because he wanted to stay and watch Joon as he did his homwork.

Joon always stayed inside the classroom to eat lunch while doing his homwork.

Some boys would come and start talking to Cheondong but the boy would always keep his gaze on Joon.

" You should just talk to him if you like him so much."  Thunder suggested.

"I want to but.............." Cheondong whined and slopped down in his chair.

"I doubt he'll turn you down, I mean you guys have known eachother since you were in VPK right?" Cheondong nodded in frustration.

"Fine; fine." Cheondong got up and walked over to Joon's sitting area.

" Uh, Joon. Can we talk?" Joon looked at Cheondong before finally getting up and following him to the school rooftop .

"What is it?" Joon asked, sounding abit weary. 

"  You know we've been freinds for a long time right.?" Joon nodded.

Feeling nervous Cheondong went on.

" And over time...............I think I may have devaloped_" Cheondong stopped, to afraid of what Joon would say if he knew his real feelings.

"You Developed what?" Joon leaded, Sighing Cheondong started speaking again.

" I think I may have developed feeling for you." Cheondong rushed out.

Joon didn't respond, he stood there and stared at Cheondong, dumbfounded.

"You can't, you can't be in love with me." Joon said a bit upset as he tried to walk away.

" Wait." Cheondong grabbed Joon's sleave but Joon quickly flinched and Cheondong had to let go.

"Why? I just confessed my feelings to you and you say that I can't love you?" Cheondong stared at Joon with a pleading look.

All he wanted was an answer, if Joon wanted to tell him that he didn't share the same feelings this wasn't the way.

" Be_ because I'm not good for yo- you. I can't even stop myself from flinching when someone touchs me and I've known you since we were kids." Joon explained.

" I don't care if I can't touch you, I love you very much and I know one day you will break through." Cheondong reassured the younger.

 Joon smiled and nodded.

" You know I also kind of had a crush on yu since elemantary school." Joon laughed.

" So will you be my boyfriend?" Cheondong asked and Joon  nodded.

The alarm went off.

I woke up groaning.

It was time to go to school.

Walking to the kitchen I spotted my mother lying down on the couch, on our coffee table was a bag of .

I just wanted to go down and shake her back to her senses.

I could she? Was she that selfish.

 Did she not care that I was getting effected as well? Or did she forget that I even existed.

I just wanted to get out and be away from her, I hated it.

I stormed back to my room and seized the shoe box that was hidden in between the rest of my clothes.

I reached to the bottom of box and grabbed the sharp razor.

Sitting against the wall, I placed it on to my wrist and slid it harshly and slowly across.

Suddenlly blood started seeping out of my arm.

At first I didn't feel it, but after a while the pain started coming.

I bit my lower lip and threw my head back, I had promised my a year ago that I wouldn't cut myself again even if it really hurt, because cutting myself would be more painful and it wouldn't help anything.

I finally went to the bathroom and cleaned my arm off then headed to school.

Joon was waiting for me at the school gates.

" Cheondong why are late? Your never late." Joon smiled and greeted me.

"Yeah sorry, I couldn't find my homwork." I chuckled and we walked to class together.

It was lunch time, Joon walked over to my table with a box.

" Come follow me, I made lunch today." I glanced at the box before following to the school rooftop.

Sitting down Joon brought out a bunch of lunch boxes out and placed them in between us.

" You know this is where you confessed to me." Joon started handing me a envelope.

Joon watched me as I opened it.

I pulled out two rings, both rings had ' J X C' imprinted on them.

" I ordered them for valentines day but they came yesterday." Joon smiled brightly.

It was the pretties smiles that I had ever seen on him, he looked proud that he accomplished somthing like that.

" Wow Thanks." I smiled and placed it on finger while he placed it on his.

 We enjoyed lunch and then went back to class.

I had art class and Joon had math so we went out seprate ways.

_______

 Our lesson was sketching and we had to sketch a picture of ourselves, which was not easy to me but everyone else were takig there time.

"And you must dra-" A student busted through the room, panting.

" Teacher a fight!" She shouted as everyone followed her to the main hall.

 There were three boys hitting on -Joon?

"Stop, stop I said stop!" The teacher shouted, but no one listened, they continued kicking at him.

I pushed through the crowd and pushed the boys off of him, shouting at them to stop.

"Joon?" I bent down and whispered.

Joon was bundled up into a ball as he covered his face from me.

" Are you Okay?" I asked placed my hands on his hair.

 Joon quickly smacked my hands off  and got up then ran away, he ran all the way out of school. No onw stopped him, not even me, maybe if I had things would have turned out better in the end.

But I didn't.

"Why were boys hitting on that kid?" The teacher shouted at the three boys.

"Oh com'on all I did was walk down the hall and then he comes and bumps into me, and where I come from that means you want trouble." The oldest one laughed.

I clenched my fist tightly and glared at them, try to stop myself from hurting them.

The teacher sent them to the didention and started class again.

After school I head out to the flower store and brought some passion flowers since they were Joon's favriot.

 I headed to Joon's house but by time I had reached it, it was passed eight'O clock and all of his lights were off, but something seemed off.

"Joon." I shouted but recived  no answer, I rang the door but no one answered, I had started to worry maybe something had happend so I opened the door with the spare key Joon had given to me.

The house was dark and the televison was on but no one was watching it.

I walked deeper into the house and heard a scrunch, when I lifted my foot I spotted broken glass.'s body

I walked into the kitchen to see a ghostley shadow sitting on the floor, I flicked on the light and spotted a blood pool surronding Joon's mother's boyfriend, he was lying on his back with a knife sticking out of his chest.

Sitting  across the room was Joon, he sat there like a ghost, frozen.

 "Joon I called for him, he didn't answer, he just sat there; dazed.

I placed my hand carefully on his cheek, that was the first time I had felt Joon.

Joon flinched at my touch but he didn't try to snatched away, he just stared at me, stared into my eyes.

"Hyung." Joon looked at me then turned to the body that lye across the tiled kitchen floor.

I went to flick on the lights but Joon grabbed my hand.

"Don't." He begged me, " Please don't turn on the light." He shook his head quickly.

 " What happened? "  I asked pointing to the body.

Joon bit his lip before starting with a sigh.

" I told him to stop, but he wouldn't stop; and he tried to do it a third time, so I grabbed the knife and told him to go but he didn't stop and then I remember  seeing red and when I came back he-he was deaf." Joon broke down and started crying, slurring out apologies to me, begging me to forgive him.

"I che-ated cheated on you, I really di-didn't want to." Joon cried in my arms.

 "Joon,  Joon it's alright. "  I hugged him tightly before feeling  something wet on him.

"Joon you have to let me see, and I can't see with the light off.  I got up and headed g for the light. 

"Cheondong  please, don't ." Joon shook his head.

 I the light to see Joon sitting there with his hands covering his face, on his shirt there was a spreading blood stain.

 I ran down to Joon's  side, placing my hands on his stab wound.

 

Joon smiled and touched my face. 

"I'very always  wanted to touch you, your face is so warm Cheondong. "  He chuckled  and laid his head onto my shoulder weakly.

 "Joon com'on, we can get you to the hospital, we just-" I tried to suppress my tears from falling but they kept flowing.

"Joon come on, you ca-" I  cried and hugged Joon tighter. 

 I din't want to let go of him, I loved him.

" Cheondong, I can'tell stay, no one lives forever , smile." Joon placed his hand on my cheek before placing a gentle kiss on my lips.

 "Just always remember that I love you." He grunted and layd his head on my shoulower once again, only this time he didn't move.

 Joon was cold and stiff, his face wasn' t warm anymore.

 I bit my lip and stared at his hand, he still wore the ring, I didn't know why I was so surprised but it made me laugh.

 It made me laugh in tall I cried, I cried because the person that I loved and needed was gone, Joon was really gone forever and there was no going back.

 I carried Joon's  body all the way back to my apartment, I told him all the stories about how we used to play together, but Joon never answered me, I started to wonder why because  I wanted him not be gone, not to leave me.

 I cleaned  his body and wrapped his cut, When I was done I lief him down in the pretties blankets I could find, I cleaned my house.

I lay next Joon's  body and played with his bangs, I had always wanted to so thay, because  it felt nice.

I stared at Joon for a a few  minutes  before grabbing the pills and stuffed them down my throat, not taking my time to breathe.

"Smile Joon."  

Smiling, I fell next to his body. Not breathing. 

I wondered how my moo  would act when she saw our dead bodies.

Well at least I got to touch Joon.

Touch.

_______________________________________________________________________

That's the end of Touch, I hoped you guys enjoyed reading.

Sorry I took so long , but this will the last book that I will uploading for a while, because Ramadan is coming and I have to be with my family fir a month a couple of days.

I hope you guys understand. 

I love you guys!