CHAPTER FIVE
 

“Stay away from me,” the small, raven haired male practically yelled as the shadow of a figure followed him into the nearest restroom. He was glaring viciously within the mirror at Seunghyun’s reflection as he turned the faucet on. Even with a swollen, bleeding lip, Yesung did not feel at all sorry for what he’d done. The older male deserved the injury.

“What did you do that for?” Seunghyun growled, wiping at remnants of Yesung’s saliva upon his cheek as well as the blood oozing from his split lip, as he went to another sink to wash it off.

“Are you ing kidding me?” Yesung spat, “What did I do that for? What did you do that for? No, who even was that back there? Because it wasn’t the Seunghyun that I have met with every other time.” He stared almost warily at the older before admitting, “Y-You scare me,” and looked back down at the running water to cup his hands under and bring a mouthful to his lips.

He swished the water within his mouth for several seconds before spitting it back into the sink, only to repeat the process. He was glad to rid his mouth of that slimy feeling that had been left behind from the older’s release. The subtle taste, however, remained. But he could at least deal with that as it really wasn’t that bad. It was just odd, that’s all. But like hell he would inform Seunghyun of this.

Seunghyun glared at the younger for a few seconds before his features gradually softened. Yesung was right. He hadn’t been himself just moments ago. A ghost of his past had seemed to have taken over and put him in a momentary rage. But it was no excuse, he shouldn’t have hurt Yesung as he did. “I’m sorry,” he murmured. Those two words were something that he seemed to be saying constantly lately.

“Don’t,” Yesung growled, shaking his head as he held back a familiar look within his eyes, “I don’t want to hear your ing meaningless apologies anymore. Everything you say is just a huge, confusing mess of lies and I am sick of it. I don’t want to do this anymore, Seunghyun.” He was facing the older now, mere feet from him.

“Are we breaking up?” Seunghyun couldn’t help but humorlessly chuckle at the words, a sad smile tugging at his lips as he kept a soft gaze upon the smaller.

Yesung’s own expression hardened. He was not in the mood to joke about anything, especially whatever the hell it was that was going on between them, if that was even anything at all.. “For the record,” he started with, “you are the last ing person that I would ever date.”

Seunghyun only gently smirked at the words before his deep voice spoke out, “Come on, what makes you so sure about that? You can’t tell me that you haven’t enjoyed some of those times we’ve been together. …Especially that night a few days ago.”

“You were different then,” Yesung murmured as he thought about that particular night. His eyes softening just a moment before quickly glaring, “You weren’t the person you become when you’re at school and around Seungri. Here, you are just like everyone else that loves to make my life a living hell.”

“I am not,” Seunghyun tried to defend. He did not hurt Yesung like those other jerks did, nor would he ever lay a hand on him like that.

“Yes, you are,” the raven hissed. “Do you have any idea of what you just did to me? It might have seemed like just a stupid to you, Seunghyun, but you forced yourself on me. I completely stepped out of my comfort zone to do something for you and all you did was take advantage of the opportunity. Honestly, I would rather get beat up by those other idiots any time than go through that again.”

“But I didn’t even hurt you, Yesung.”

“Yes, you did,” the younger tried to say calmly. He was losing his patience with the older, who clearly was not understanding a word of anything that he was saying.

But then something seemed to click in the older’s mind. Yesung isn’t necessarily talking about physical pain.

“When I told you those things that night about my parents… it took a lot for me to do that. I was stupid enough to think that I could put my trust in you, but then you go right back to treating me like I’m just some doll that you can do whatever the hell you want with,” Yesung admitted, “Whenever I think that things are somewhat becoming okay between us, you always go and do something like that to completely it up. Why? Do you just enjoy pulling people towards you only to push them away?”

Seunghyun felt as if the tables had turned. This conversation seemed all too familiar, only it had been Yesung on the receiving end the last time, not himself.

“You know what, I don’t care,” Yesung said upon realizing that the older male was not going to say anything, “Just leave me alone from now on, please.”

“Wait,” Seunghyun said, a hand having reached out to gently grab onto Yesung’s elbow as the raven had been on his way to the door. His gaze had been steadily focused on the floor but made its way to the younger, “Look. You’re not the only one with demons from your past still haunting you. …There’s so many things that have turned me into the terrible person that I am today, Yesung. And I’m sorry that you’ve had to experience me at my worst. I didn’t mean to hurt you back there. I just, sort of lost control. I’m sorry. Really, I am.” He sighed, a hand having reached up to rub at the back of his neck, “I’m not playing some sort of game with you, and I really hope that you don’t feel that way. It’s just that, all of this is new for me too.”

Yesung stared at the blue-haired male a moment, eyes boring into his in hopes of finding any sort of truth within those dark orbs. The more words that fell from Seunghyun’s lips, the more he became incredibly confused. A part within himself was demanding to just say a good ‘ you’ to this and be on his way… but that other part that felt the need to at least hear someone out was quickly butting in.

“Why are you trying so hard with me?” Yesung hadn’t realized the words had left his lips until Seunghyun was looking at him with slight surprise, “I’m sure there are tons of other guys that you could find that would want to mess around and experiment like this with you. So why me?”

“I don’t experiment with you,” the older said almost gruffly. And that was the truth. Nothing he did with Yesung was for an experimental purpose and he did not plan on throwing the younger male aside once he’d had his fix. Because that was the thing… he was quite sure that he would never have enough of Yesung.

“Okay,” Yesung shrugged, refusing to argue about that, “you still haven’t answered me.”

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t know what?”

“Why I try so hard,” Seunghyun muttered with an almost agitated sigh, “I guess… you just make me want to try. I don’t know.”

Yesung couldn’t help but enjoy how the older was becoming, and a small smirk had worked its way onto his lips as he regarded him thoughtfully. Seunghyun’s cheeks had just a tint of a blush within them while his dark eyes avoided any and all eye contact. Was Seunghyun suddenly becoming shy and nervous all of a sudden? The raven wanted to laugh and pick on him… but he knew this wasn’t easy for the other male either. Then again… Seunghyun did not deserve easy.

“I still think we should just stop this,” the raven said after a prominent silence. He knew it was the best thing to do: to stop seeing Seunghyun altogether. But really, he didn’t want to stop. The last thing he wanted was to go right back to that loneliness he used to have before the older male had come into his life.

“I don’t,” Seunghyun said truthfully, and he pulled Yesung closer to himself as he murmured, “and I know that you don’t actually want to stop this either.” His lips were just an inch or so from Yesung’s, and he glanced down to the pouty pair before dropping his eyes shut and leaning fully forward to close the gap in a rather soft, delicate kiss.

The lip lock was completely one-sided at first. Until finally Yesung gave in and pressed a harder kiss against the older’s lips, dropping his mouth open carefully to take Seunghyun’s tongue in that had been hinting of its desires none too discreetly. He could taste hints of blood from where he’d bitten Seunghyun at and for a mere second felt bad about it until assuring himself that the idiot had had it coming. In fact, Seunghyun was lucky he hadn’t been wounded worse as Yesung had been seconds from kneeing him in the crotch when they’d been within the supply closet.

Breaking the kiss for air, Seunghyun let out a chuckled sigh of relief as he rested his forehead against Yesung’s and allowed their breath to mix.

“If you do anything like you did back there ever again… I will be done with you, Seunghyun,” the younger’s tone had a sort of serious finality within it, and he glanced up into Seunghyun’s eyes as he added, “I’m serious.”

“I believe you,” Seunghyun murmured, reaching a hand up hesitantly before lightly a couple of fingers along his jawline, “and I wouldn’t blame you either.”

“Good.”

A smirk appeared on the blue-haired male’s lips. He was glad that things were somewhat back to normal between them and swore that he would try his damnedest to keep it this way. His thoughts drifted to the conversation he’d had hours ago with Seungri, “Do you want to come to a party tonight?”

~ ~ ~

What the was I thinking? Yesung had asked himself this repeatedly as he awkwardly stood in the far corner, squished among the crowd of people that littered the living room of the house party that was taking place. For some idiotic reason, he had agreed to come with Seunghyun to this.

Except that was just the thing. They couldn’t actually come to it together. Sure, they could interact once both there but arriving together was a definite no-no. Seungri, as well as any of Seunghyun’s other friends, would know something was up in a heartbeat. And so the older had told him a time and place to show up at and that he would see him there.

And that’s all that had happened.

Yesung had made eye contact with Seunghyun several times now, but the latter would merely hold the stare a moment before breaking it to continue whatever senseless conversation he was having with his friends. He appeared a bit tipsy already as his deep voice was loud and could clearly be heard at random intervals above the music while he also used overdramatic arm movements whenever speaking.

It had been over an hour. And nothing. The raven stared down into the red cup within his hand that held a few more sips of beer. He was planning on finishing it off and then ditching this place. Because really, what was the point of being here if he couldn’t even actually be with Seunghyun?

The thought had Yesung stilling. Since when did he ever want to be with that blue-haired ogre to begin with? He didn’t, really. Then why did you come here, a voice in his head teased. He didn’t like what his conscience was insinuating. There was no possible way he wanted to spend time with Seunghyun just for the sake of being with him. Of course not. He yearned for the older male to kiss him, and touch him… and him. Yesung swallowed, trying to keep those thoughts at bay. The last thing he needed was an in the middle of this crowd.

I only want to be with him for the physical aspect of it, Yesung assured himself. It was nothing else. There was absolutely no feeling there. Well, maybe hate was present quite a bit of the time… but that was it.

Giving one last glance to the male that seemed to know how to continuously worm his way into his thoughts, Yesung muttered a quiet, “ this,” and pushed his way through those around him. He arrived at the doorway to the backyard and paused a moment as he gave a glance behind himself. This wasn’t how he had come in, and he contemplated either exiting here or searching again for the front door. But when someone had drunkenly stumbled into him, he decided that going out here was fine. Surely he would be able to either walk around the house, or exit through a back gate.

The cool breeze of the night air hit him as he stepped out, and a small microscopic smile came to his lips at the feeling when it ruffled his dark, messy hair. How he had managed to stay within that hot, stuffy house, he hadn’t a clue.

“Hey,” a voice called out in a beckoning manner.

Yesung looked past the deck he was on, to see a small group of older classmen standing upon the lawn at the bottom of the stairs. A few were smoking cigarettes while another passed around what smelled to be a blunt. The raven had never tried the drug, and from its stench didn’t exactly want to, but he knew it was said to make you feel really good.

“Yesung, right?” that same voice asked as he took an almost timid step forward.

Something was not right. This particular group of boys was usually rather cruel and demeaning towards him… not somewhat welcoming as they were being now. Perhaps the presence of alcohol changed that?

Yesung nodded, shoving hands into the pockets of his jeans as he came closer, making it look as if he were in search of a cigarette pack.

“Oh yeah,” another chimed in once he was able to get a good look at the younger’s face, “little YeFag.” The entire group broke into laughter. “How the did you find out about this party, eh?” the male continued to inquire.

An obvious angered annoyance settled on Yesung’s face and he shook his head as he made to turn away. He should have known that these boys were not going to invite him into their group to smoke and mindlessly chat about whatever. Of course not. Fitting in and being part of the crowd always was and would be a stupid dream of Yesung’s. He was never going to feel normal.

“Hey,” the one that had initially called him over rose up a hand to grab at a forearm, “not so fast.” The tall male took a pleased drag off of his cigarette as Yesung, though glaring dangerously at him, stopped to glance back. “How about you me off and in return I won’t kick your after school tomorrow, hm?” Again, snorts of drunken laughter sounded.

“ you,” Yesung muttered as he jerked his arm away from the group. He’d only taken one step back up the stairs when he found himself suddenly tripping forward to crash down onto his hands and knees, the lingering pressure of a pair of hands against his back.

“I wasn’t asking you, dip .”

Immediately, a hand was gripping into the younger’s messy, raven hair and pulling roughly, causing a hiss of pain to escape as he stumbled back onto his feet. Yesung hardly had time to catch his breath as a hand fisted the collar of his shirt and began to yank him out onto the lawn and further from the house, away from anyone that could possibly help him. “Let go,” he tried snarling out and thrashing away as he yelled out other obscenities.

An unexpected fist colliding with his jaw immediately silenced him. The sickening crack being heard first before the sudden intense burning pain spread throughout the area like a poison. It left Yesung feeling dizzy and he stumbled even more as he tried to keep his balance. But his feet tangled and he fell to his knees, only to be drug the remainder of the way.

The sound of cloth ripping filled the air, and Yesung felt the chill of the night hit the bare skin of his upper torso, making him realize that it was his t-shirt that was torn. It hung loosely off of one shoulder, exposing a bruise just below his collarbone, but none of the older boys cared to notice. If anything, they only assumed it had been done by one of them at one point or another.

Yesung tried to yell out again, only to receive another hit from a different boy. And this time, he could taste blood as his nose began to ache noticeably. The warm liquid streamed from a nostril, making a path down to his lips only to drip off of the outward curve of his upper lip. Don’t ing cry, he begged within his mind. But all of the pain was slowly becoming too much. He was not used to injuries upon his face as typically his father, as well as the bullies, avoided to leave marks in places that could be seen. But apparently in their drunken stupor, these upper classmen did not care.

“I bet you’re a little ing cockwhore,” the main leader of the group slurred out as he finally released his hold upon Yesung’s torn shirt and allowed him to fully fall to the rough gravel of the ground. They weren’t in the backyard any longer but instead within the deserted gravel alleyway just beyond. Yesung couldn’t help but desperately look down the road in hopes of seeing someone, anyone. But it was dark and there wasn’t a single soul around that would possibly care enough to help.

“I’m not ing gay,” Yesung spat out as he glared up at the older boys. He may have been scared out of his wits at the moment, but like hell he was going to show that on the outside. Afterall, he still very much had a prominent masculinity that pride demanded he defend. That was something Seunghyun hadn’t managed to rob him of, even if he did become easily undone at the slightest caress of said male’s fingers or lips.

“Right,” snorted the tallest boy, sarcasm clearly evident within his voice.

An audible sound of a zipper echoed within the raven’s ears and he immediately threw himself back. He didn’t think that the oldest male was actually serious. What completely straight guy wanted his off by another guy? None that Yesung knew of… unless you counted a certain blue-haired, gorilla-sized idiot of a man. The thought of Seunghyun had the raven’s heart clenching. Why couldn’t he ever be around when he actually needed him?

“Where do you think you’re going?”

Yesung hated the scared whimper he involuntarily let out as the two boys on either side of him grabbed for his shoulders in a tight grip, bringing him back up onto his knees and in front of their leader. One even tangled a hand within his hair, clutching and pulling at the delicate roots to yank his head back and force a cry out.

“You know,” the oldest chuckled as he glanced down, “you’re kind of cute when you’re scared.” A hand was already shoved within his pants, roughly to bring himself to arousal. He let out a breathy grunt, mere seconds from tugging his hardened length out to promptly shove within the raven’s mouth.

“What the are you idiots doing?”

Yesung’s eyes snapped open at the voice. It was deep, angered, and so obviously drunk. He knew that voice. Involuntarily, his heart was pounding within his chest and he wanted to look to assure himself it was whom he thought but his head was still being held firmly back by the hand within his hair.

“Seung—,”

A punch was thrown within a matter of seconds, and instantly Yesung felt himself released as he fell back onto hands and knees, the gravel of the road scraping into his palms but he couldn’t find it in himself to even care as he snapped his gaze towards a body that was now writhing upon the ground feet in front of him.

He couldn’t help but stare, wide-eyed, as the familiar male laid a sharp kick into the body. And then another, and another. All the while a roar of curse words fell from his lips, “Pick on anyone in the school you want. But leave him the alone, you got that?” The blue-haired male had stopped the kicks after deeming it enough before continuing to insult the brainless jock, “Stupid ing punk- wannabe.” He spat on the nearly passed out male in finality.

Yesung swallowed hard, instinctually crawling back when Seunghyun’s heated gaze landed upon him. He had never seen or heard the older become so angry before. Even when the two would commonly argue, Seunghyun never took it to that kind of anger. In fact, the raven was amazed that he was capable of that at all. Seunghyun may have been a jerk at times, but he was really just a giant teddy bear at heart. At least, that is what Yesung had come to believe.

“Are you okay?” The older asked as he came to a stop in front of Yesung. When he received a slow nod of the head as a reply, he bent down to suddenly scoop the boy up within his arms, hooking an arm under thin knees as well as behind a back.

“Seunghyun!” Yesung yelped out at the unexpected action, his own arms instinctually reaching up to clutch around a neck so that he didn’t accidentally fall out of the drunkenly clumsy grip that the blue-haired male had on him. “What the are you doing?” he continued to growl out, a slightly embarrassed blush appearing on his cheeks as Seunghyun carried him back towards the house. He wasn’t a damsel in distress and was perfectly capable of walking still.

A snort escaped from Seunghyun as he only tightened his grip when Yesung squirmed, “This is the thanks I get for saving your ?”

“I didn’t need your help,” Yesung lied in a soft snip, “I could have gotten myself out of that.”

Seunghyun merely ignored the words as he carried him back within the house. But instead of continuing on into the crowded living room and kitchen, he turned right and pushed open a door to descend a set of stairs. Immediately, darkness enveloped them as the door fell back shut and Yesung couldn’t help but swallow hard at the situation. He was being held within a drunken Seunghyun’s arms, who was standing at the top of a set of stairs, and it was pitch black. Surely, he was going to die because of this big, dumb idiot.

“Seung—,” as soon as he’d spoken, Yesung heard some part of Seunghyun’s body collide with the nearest wall and light flooded the room below, as well as the staircase. He realized it was the older’s elbow that was used to flick the switch and was thankful that he was at least capable enough of retaining his memory still.

Upon making it safely to the bottom of the stairs, the raven let out a relieved sigh. But the tall male continued to be persistent upon holding him and refused to put him down until they were settled within a rather spacious bathroom.

Yesung glanced around as he was set down, the arm under his legs pulling away first before he managed to find his balance and stand on his own, only to be pushed back and down onto the top of a closed lid of a toilet. He watched silently as Seunghyun turned away to pull open the medicine cabinet only to messily dig through it.

Tearing his gaze away, the small male looked ahead of himself to be met with his reflection upon a mirror on the opposite side of the bathroom. He froze at the sight of how much of a complete mess that he was. Blood had begun to crust and dry around his nostrils while more of it was smeared on and around his lips and chin. Not only that, but a gruesome looking bruise was becoming quickly apparent upon his jaw and as he dropped open his mouth to lightly gyrate the area, he couldn’t help but wince at the pain that shot throughout.

His eyes fell lower to the shirt that was just barely clinging onto his torso, and he immediately felt self-conscious at the sight of the pale skin, as well as at a bruise that was managing to peek its way out. Why did those heads have to play rough with him like that? The beatings before may have hurt, but at least they weren’t emotionally scarring as what tonight’s experience would have been. Yesung hated the hot tears that were trying to make their way forth, the slight burn of their presence evident. Why did everyone always have to humiliate him like that?

“You’re okay.”

Yesung’s glazed eyes flicked to the older male that had come to stand in front of him, and he realized that it was Seunghyun’s attempt at comfort. A piss-poor one, but an attempt nonetheless. 

“Did they… do anything to you?” the slur in Seunghyun’s voice was becoming less and less. It was always serious situations such as this that sobered him up quickly. “I mean, besides the—,”

“No,” Yesung cut in before the older could finish. He didn’t even want to think about everything that would have happened if Seunghyun hadn’t shown up. His gaze fell back to staring straight ahead as a wet cloth pressed to his nose and began wiping at the remnants of blood. “You don’t need to do this,” Yesung tried to say, involuntarily shivering from the chill of the room as the basement was quite cold compared to upstairs.

Seunghyun snorted, lightly smacking at the small hand that tried to interfere and grab the rag from him, “All you have to say is thank you.”

Thank you? Yesung couldn’t help his eyebrows from sinking into a glare as he began to admit, “I feel like I should hardly thank you at all. I came to this stupid party because you invited me, and so thanks to you, those s did this to me. All you’ve done tonight is ignore me, Seunghyun. Give me one ing reason why I should actually thank you.”

“I haven’t been ignoring you because I want to,” Seunghyun answered, voice low and tinged with a layer of what could be deciphered as guilt. He was trying not to let everything else that Yesung had said get to him, that it was his fault that Yesung had been nearly molested. He knew that it was… in fact, the entire rumor of Yesung being gay was his fault as well, as he had been the one to impose actions upon the smaller that made Seungri assume Yesung was a homoual. God, everything was ed up. “I was just, trying to think of ways to bring you up so that it would give me a reason to invite you over to the group of people I was hanging out with,” he managed to answer.

“Whatever,” Yesung shook his head at the words. He really didn’t care if it was a lie or the truth. All he really wanted was just to go home. “Can you just finish so that I can leave already?” he asked, and winced when a hand brushed against his bruised jaw.

“You want to go home” Seunghyun replied, one eyebrow risen, “when those idiots are probably still lurking around outside?”

The raven wanted to retort some sort of comment that would make himself feel higher up than the older male, but found himself falling short. Because Seunghyun had a point. Although the leader of that group had taken a good beating, it still wouldn’t be surprising to find that they were all outside just waiting for a chance to get Yesung, or even Seunghyun, alone. In fact, if Yesung were to get caught by himself again, he may just end up in the hospital.

“Well, I don’t want to stay here,” Yesung decided to counter with as he glanced down at his torso, “and I can’t go out like this.” He tried pulling the torn shirt up over his shoulder to cover the skin but it only slipped back down as soon as he’d let go.

“Here,” Seunghyun murmured upon setting the rag aside.

Yesung looked back up to be met with a black hoodie being practically shoved into his face. Seunghyun’s hoodie. “I don’t want to—,”

“Wear it.”

A sigh of annoyance escaped the small male as he almost hesitantly took the piece of clothing from the older. He hated how Seunghyun never gave him a chance to voice any sort of opinion. But really, there wasn’t exactly any other option. Unless they went raiding through the house in search of clothes, which is something the owner probably wouldn’t be too fond of. And Yesung didn’t exactly want to wear the clothes of some stranger, even if it was only a shirt.

Without saying another word, Yesung easily pulled the shirt from his torso. He dropped it to the ground, frowning lightly at the loss of one of his favorite shirts, before slipping his twig-like arms through the sleeves of Seunghyun’s hoodie. Of course the article of clothing was baggy on him. He was nothing but a mere skeleton while Seunghyun had a well-muscled and built body.

“This is so big on me,” Yesung finally said, his hands gripping onto the ends of the hoodie. He bent his head forward to get a better view so that he could zip it shut and not have to see glimpses of his milky white skin any longer. But his uniquely small fingers seemed to struggle with the zipper that continued to get caught upon a thread.

Seunghyun knelt down, gently pushing the hands away before doing it himself. It’s not that he was trying to baby the younger, but that he knew this hoodie was particularly stubborn when it came to the zipper. “There,” he gave a small smirk, “you look fine.”

“I didn’t say I cared what I looked like.”

A shrug of the shoulders was given in response from the older male. Sometimes he could deal with Yesung’s kitten-like snip, and yet other times the attitude rather annoyed him. “I want you to stay,” he decided to voice, “I’ll bring you over and introduce you to my friends.”

“Is Seungri still here?”

“You’re asking about the biggest party animal in the entire country,” Seunghyun joked, “Of course he is still here.” He didn’t miss the agitated look upon Yesung’s face, “Don’t worry. I won’t let him bother you, okay?”

Yesung rolled his eyes at hearing this, “I don’t need your protection, Seunghyun. I’m not a ing kid.”

“Mm,” the older hummed thoughtfully as a coy smirk came to his lips, “really? Because you certainly sound like a little snot-nosed child when you speak like that.” The smile upon his face grew at the sight of Yesung’s scowl and he even reached a hand forward to ruffle at messy raven locks.

“Yahhh, you,” Yesung growled out as he swatted at the hand and stood up from where he’d been sitting. He did not enjoy being treated like this, especially from Seunghyun. Even if the tall male was his hyung, he didn’t care. In his mind, one should only have respect if they’ve earned it and Seunghyun was so damn far from ever earning it.

“Stop,” the blue-haired male said in a tone that was a mixture of serious yet playful, as if he were scolding an adorable child that was in trouble. He’d brought forward a hand to rest against the side of Yesung’s neck, knowing better than to place it anywhere near the sore, bruised jawline, and tilted his head down to press a quick kiss against unsuspecting lips.

The feeling always threw Seunghyun into another world. He just couldn’t get over how soft the younger’s lips were, nor how perfectly well they seemed to meld into his own. And the taste. Don’t even get the older started on how much he craved for that moment when Yesung would carefully drop open his mouth and allow entrance. Seunghyun had to do all that he could to stop himself from plunging his eager tongue into that velvety heat in a very animalistic way. And as much of a miracle as it was, somehow he always managed to control himself enough to the point where he would just casually slip the muscle within.

They pulled apart with an audible smack after a moment. Seunghyun was always so caught up within his own thoughts about the kiss that he never stopped to look at the expression upon Yesung’s face. Perhaps if he would have spared a glance, he would have been able to see that the younger felt exactly the same way about the lip locks.

~ ~ ~

The music was loud. Incredibly loud. That’s about as much as Yesung could register within his drunken state as he glanced around the living room with a rather dazed expression on his face; all the while lazily holding a half-filled red cup of beer in his hand. Somehow he had found himself upon the living room couch, squished between one of the arms of it and the loud, energetic male that had thrown this party: Kwon Jiyong.

Seunghyun had been beside him, but was now dancing to the loud, poppy music that filled every single room of this house. He’d been pulled up from the couch by Seungri and drug out to join said male and a few promiscuously dressed ladies. Yesung had stared after, only to be given a glare from Seungri with a look that clearly said: Don’t you dare ing follow us out here. And so he hadn’t, he’d continued to sit upon the couch with his drink. But he didn’t exactly care, because despite that jerk he felt really good due to the intoxication. And well, perhaps a certain moment earlier was also to blame for his good mood.

It was when Seunghyun had brought Yesung back upstairs to join their group of friends. Initially, the small raven had been incredibly nervous. He was waiting for the name-calling, for Seungri to demean him as he always did, and for Seunghyun to play along with it. Of course Seungri said something. Yesung knew he wasn’t going to get away with hearing nothing from the idiot. But it was the deep, gruff voice from beside him that had made his heart nearly stop, “Shut up, Ri. That joke is getting old. Not to mention other dumb classmen are stealing it from you too.”

Seungri had been just as much caught off guard as Yesung had been, and had to pause a moment to figure out what to reply back, until saying in a bit more serious tone, “You’re actually bringing him over here?”

The taller shrugged, “What’s the big deal? He was by himself.” [Yesung pretended the announcement of his singularity hadn’t at all momentarily effected his pride.] “He usually hangs around our group anyway after school all of the time,” Seunghyun also added before having thrown a glance to Yesung and asking if he’d wanted a drink.

That had been hours ago. But Yesung felt as if he were still glowing from it all. Seunghyun had stood up to Seungri for him— for him. Sure, it may not have been as dramatic and defensive as Yesung would have liked. [For example, Seunghyun throwing a right hook at Seungri and demanding he leave Yesung alone or else.] But it was a start, and the young raven would damn well take it.

So this was why Yesung didn’t care of the glare that had been sent his way, and in return had given Seungri a smug little grin to which the older male’s eyes had only slightly widened in further anger. It was amusing as hell and Yesung was clearly enjoying himself. However, the alcohol helped a whole lot in this too.

If only Yesung could stop his eyes from lingering on Seunghyun now. It’s not like he was afraid of being found out for staring. Most people hardly even noticed him, and those who did could care less of what he was doing. No. What was bothering him was the girl that the older male was dancing so obscenely with. She was in front of him, grinding her popped out into his crotch while he was pressed up against her back, hands on hips to hold onto and sway both of them to the music. In his drunken state, he was clearly enjoying it.

And Yesung felt jealous. No. His mind immediately argued at the thought. He was not jealous. Girlfriends or boyfriends became jealous and considering that he was not one to anyone, that meant he couldn’t possibly be jealous. Who cares if Seunghyun was dancing with that make-up doused ? You do. Yesung was ready to scream at the voice in his head if it didn’t shut the up. Luckily, a distraction had him tearing his eyes from the handsome male.

“Hey, hey! Careful of that goddamn vase. My parents will ing kill me if it breaks, you s!” 

Yesung couldn’t help but giggle at the male that was yelling out beside him in laughing hysterics. Though the party-thrower was completely serious with his words, the deliverance of them was total opposite due to the intake of so many different things he’d had throughout the night: liquor, weed, beer, cigarettes. There was no limit for Kwon Jiyong.

“Mm… Yesung, right?”

The raven’s eyes widened in surprise when he realized it was the male next to him that had said this. He hadn’t even been aware that his small laugh had caught the older’s attention until a rather intimidating gaze was being placed upon him.

Yesung nodded, taking a gulp of his drink to occupy his mind enough so that he could think of what to possibly say. He wasn’t sure why he was suddenly nervous. It could have been because Jiyong was actually quite an attractive person, or that he was an incredibly popular senior. Or it could have been the almost lustful look that was burning into him. He couldn’t help but notice Jiyong’s eyes flick down over his frame while a smirk pulled at those lips in what looked to be satisfaction.

“You know who I am?” the older asked, stretching out his free arm to place upon the back of the couch. His arm was just barely grazing against Yesung’s shoulders and yet the raven felt his cheeks growing hot at the action.

“Uh,” Yesung paused for a just a moment before questioning aloud, “Jiyong?” He only knew because Seunghyun had told him earlier. Otherwise, he knew nothing about the boy due to the fact that he went to a different school on the other side of town. Well, he knew nothing other than that the male was really popular. Enough to know kids from schools all over and throw successful parties such as this.

“How do you know my name?” the raven asked then. He could feel the random nerves fading away as he continued to sip at his beverage. For a moment, he was terrified that the popular male had heard of him because of Seungri’s damn rumors, and that he was going to be subjected to the torture and ridicule once again.

“I saw you earlier,” Jiyong shrugged, turning his torso just enough so that he was facing the smaller more as he leaned in so that his words would be heard easier, “and I noticed Seunghyun was hanging around you a bit, so I asked him.” His face was dangerously close to Yesung’s, but neither seemed to mind of the proximity. “You must go to Seoul East High too,” Jiyong nodded, his eyes staying locked with the raven’s aside from the random flicker down at his lips, “I’m sure I would remember a face like yours if you went to my school.”

Yesung snorted in laughter at the last comment. He should have known this older male was here to pick on him. “I know I’m not that good looking,” he chuckled, shaking his head. The alcohol made any sort of insults feel like nothing mentally and he was thankful for that. “But I’m not like, some sort of walking fungus that is scarring to the eyes, am I? …I don’t know. Maybe I am. it, I don’t care.”

For a second Jiyong’s eyebrows had scrunched up in a look of confusion, as if he were wondering where those words had come from. But the look soon eased out as his smirk only grew and he leaned forward to say only loud enough for the smaller to hear, “You’re cute.”

Except Yesung didn’t hear it. “What?” he practically yelled in response.

“Let’s go upstairs,” Jiyong said instead of repeating, and pointed towards the stairs that were just a short walk away from the couch.

Again, Yesung had only caught a word or two, but was able to understand what the older male had asked and nodded his head. It made sense to go somewhere a bit more quiet so that they could actually talk versus having a conversation such as this. But why Kwon Jiyong wanted to talk to him, Yesung hadn’t a clue. It’s not like he was within the in crowd that was most of the people here. The only thing he had going for him was that he’d been with Seunghyun.

Giving one last glance to the blue-haired male who had seemed to block out everyone else aside from the girl he was dancing with, Yesung rolled his eyes and gladly followed after Jiyong. At least I am actually hanging out with the host of the party. That makes me cooler than anyone else here, Seunghyun included. The childish voice in the raven’s mind said this quite triumphantly. He gave a smile when the older male reached back to gently grab onto one of his wrists and guide him towards the stairs.

Jiyong paused a moment at the first step, glancing back to the smaller, “Do you want to grab another drink before we go up or are you good?”

His cup was nearing empty but Yesung shook his head, feeling a bit dizzy at the action. He’d had more than enough and if he continued to drink like this, surely he would end up blacking out. The older held up his own cup that was just a few sips from being full, “You can have some of mine if you want,” and continued up the stairs that disappeared into the darkened second floor. He had made sure to yell at everyone that the upstairs was off limits the moment the party had begun. Usually, his guests were pretty good at listening to the request.

The music wasn’t near as loud on the second floor, though the thumping of the bass was still rather evident, and Yesung felt happy that he could actually talk to someone without having to yell. It was such an obnoxious thing to do, which was why he typically hated coming to parties. “Careful,” Jiyong murmured when he stumbled, his foot having caught upon the corner of a desk, and he involuntarily brought up a hand to clutch onto the older.

Jiyong continued to lead him through the darkness, pushing open the door at the end of the hallway and flicking on the light of the room. Immediately, an incredibly messy bedroom came into view. Clothes littered the floor, both dirty and clean, left-over pizza sat upon the desk within that was also littered with notebooks and paper, and the bed appeared as if it hadn’t been made in ages. The blankets and pillows were in disarray, but it looked incredibly comfortable.

“Yeah, it’s a ing mess,” the older chuckled as he stole a glance at the raven’s face, shutting the door behind him once he’d stepped within. “Don’t mind it,” he then added and reached for Yesung’s drink to take and set aside with his own.

Yesung wasn’t sure why he’d done that, but thought nothing of it and sheepishly turned away to regard the poster on the back of the door. Now that they were in an enclosed room, the noise from downstairs was much quieter and the younger was doing his best to think of what they could possibly converse about now that they were here. “What did you say to me downstairs?” he decided to ask.

A quirked eyebrow was the response before understanding came and the senior nodded his head as a smile came to his lips, “I said you were cute.”

“Oh.” That was the only reply that Yesung could give. Because seriously, what the was he supposed to say back to that? He may have been rather drunk, but he still wasn’t used to receiving any sort of compliments, especially from another man. Not even Seunghyun had ever made a comment regarding his appearance.

“Is it true what I’ve heard about you?”

Yesung looked back to him, confusion clear, “What have you heard about me? …I thought you said you’d only just learned my name tonight from Seunghyun.”

“I wasn’t lying,” Jiyong nodded, stepping closer, “but Seungri was there and also had quite a few colorful things to say about you.”

Of course. Lee mothering Seungri. There weren’t many people within his life that Yesung could say he truly hated. Sure, he disliked his step-parents and the other bullies at school. But it never was exactly to the point where he absolutely loathed them. There was always that small hope within him that those people had some sort of good inside their hearts that would some day show itself. But Seungri was different. Seungri was an absolute lost cause that didn’t have a single ounce of love in his veins. Yesung could and would admit that he hated the male with his entire being.

 Jiyong couldn’t help but laugh at the look upon Yesung’s face. How it had gone from content to an immediate frown. “He’s an , I agree,” he said in understanding, taking another step closer. “And don’t worry, I never believe half the he says. But I was just really curious after what he told me about you. Are you actually gay?”

It was if the air around them had suddenly grown incredibly hot and for a moment, Yesung felt as if he couldn’t breathe. He didn’t know why he wasn’t answering back. Why he wasn’t yelling a hysterical: ‘No! Of course I’m not gay.” Maybe because he’d never actually stopped to ponder that question. Was he gay? He can’t even remember the last time he had looked at a girl and felt lust or desire for them. Sure, there were always pretty girls around, but Yesung never felt like doing anything with them. It just didn’t seem to intrigue him any longer.

Then there was Seunghyun. Perhaps that boy had filled his thoughts so much he wasn’t able to think about anyone else. Did he find Seunghyun attractive? Yes, without a doubt. But that’s only because the blue-haired male was an incredibly handsome male. Anyone would agree to that, male or female. Right?

What about Jiyong? That snarky voice brought up. Yesung bit his lower lip as he glanced to the older male, surprised to see that he was standing right in front of him. Now that it was just the two of them he was able to actually focus only on Jiyong.

The senior’s hair was an unruly short mess, the longer strands of his bangs falling down into mischief-glazed eyes. Its color looked to have once been red, but was now fading into a reddish pink, and Yesung would be lying if he said it didn’t look damn good on the slender male. He then noticed the light smudge of eyeliner that coated around Jiyong’s dark orbs. The make-up brought them out incredibly and actually looked good. Yesung didn’t know any man that could pull off eyeliner like that.

Yes, he’s ing hot. The small raven decided to conclude with.

Jiyong took that last step as he rose a hand up to rest gently upon Yesung’s face, cupping at the cheek opposite of the bruised one, their lips barely an inch apart, “Or maybe you need my help to figure that out? …I could do that.”

Swallowing hard, Yesung rested both of his open palms against the older’s chest as he looked into his eyes. He knew that he should have pushed away, but he wanted so badly not to. And so when Jiyong’s other hand had slid down to grip at one of his hips to pull their torsos together, he decided not to and instead closed that remaining distance between their lips. Seunghyun was having his own fun with someone else downstairs too, so why couldn’t he?

The kiss was unlike any that Seunghyun had placed upon his lips: it was hard, and clearly filled with an insatiable lust as it took mere seconds before Jiyong was practically shoving his tongue within the heat of the raven’s mouth to taste the hidden sweetness. The older male was fast, but what else would you expect from someone that was merely trying to hook up?

Sliding his hands up along the defined chest, Yesung wrapped his arms around the older’s neck as the kiss deepened. Even if it wasn’t soft and gentle like Seunghyun’s caring kisses, he was still going to enjoy this… whatever this was. He threaded fingers into the hair upon the back of Jiyong’s head, clutching and lightly pulling upon the strands as he too became filled with want for the other.

“Y-You’re gay?” Yesung panted out when they’d finally broken the kiss, and allowed his head to lightly fall back as the senior began to kiss down along his neck, biting and at whatever patches his mouth deemed deliciously edible enough.

“Mm,” Jiyong’s lips smacked together as he pulled just an inch away from the spot he’d been upon, “biual, actually. But I’m pretty sure I prefer guys more.” He picked up his head, a grin plastered upon his face, “Were you that oblivious to my flirting earlier that you couldn’t tell?”

Flirting? When? The answer to his question must have been evident due to Yesung’s expression.

Laughter filled the room from the older, and he murmured out a, “You’re so ing adorable,” before kissing the boy again. This time, Yesung moaned into the kiss, allowing such easy entrance into his mouth. But it was due to the hand that had somehow slipped to his back and made it past the waistband of his jeans to eagerly clutch at one of his plump cheeks. For reasons unknown, the somewhat aggressive feeling of the hand groping there was really turning him on.

Jiyong was like a damn ual ninja: fast and sneaky. If Yesung wasn’t careful, he’d have his clothes stripped off in no time.

Guiding him back towards the bed as their lips continued to press, nip, and at the other pair, the older managed to coax Yesung into sitting down upon the edge. Which then soon turned into crawling back and laying down. The raven could hardly focus on what was going on due to those needy lips that hardly gave him any chance to breathe. Not to mention the hand that continued to remain within the back of his pants: gripping and pulling their hips to press together.

“Ji,” the raven whimpered out, a nickname slipping off of his lips as if they had been best friends since they were in diapers. His senses were slowly beginning to come back to him. Mostly in comparing how incredibly different this all was from Seunghyun. “I don’t know if I—,” he had to pause to moan as his hips involuntarily bucked up, “—want to do this.”

“Shh,” Jiyong whispered into his ear, placing a kiss just in front of it, “it’s fine. I’m not going to hurt you,” he gave a smirk, “and I know your body wants this.”

A whine came from Yesung this time, his eyelids drooping shut from the drowsiness that had begun to weigh upon his body once they had laid down. He never understood how alcohol caused him to become sleepy so easily. “Please… we should just, go back downstairs.”

Jiyong stared at the boy quizzically. Why in the hell had he come upstairs with him in the first place if he hadn’t wanted to do this. Had he seriously thought they were just going to talk like a couple of schoolgirls at a slumber party? “We can after this,” the senior said, finally sliding his hand out from groping the raven’s as he instead went for the buckle of Yesung’s pants, “I’ll be quick.” There was no way he was going to let this little tease go without doing something with him.

Inching the jeans down just enough so that the boy’s boxer briefs were visible, Jiyong paused to lightly palm at the growing bulge, wanting first to hear some sort of reaction from Yesung before he proceeded any further. A moan immediately sounded out, especially when he squeezed harder upon the package, but so did a name as well… a name that definitely wasn’t his own.

‘Did you say Seunghyun?’ Jiyong wanted to ask, but when he glanced up to the smaller’s face, realized that the sleepy boy probably hadn’t a clue of anything he’d been saying for the past several minutes. He really wanted to continue. To have his way with this little raven-haired beauty, but felt that he couldn’t. First off, the kid was basically asleep. And second, apparently someone else possibly had dibs upon him. And Choi ing Seunghyun at that. The ? The tall male wasn’t even gay! Or at least, that was what Jiyong had thought. Now he didn’t know anymore.

But he needed to find out. Now.

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Author's Note: Well... Kwon Jiyong just wrote himself into the story without hardly asking me. Haha.

How are you all enjoying the story so far? Is there anything you hate and would rather see less of, as well as anything you really love and want to see more of?

Please comment and let me know. :) Also, thank you so much for all of the subscriptions and upvotes. <3

If you enjoy reading Yesung with Big Bang members, please also subscribe to my oneshot collection: Coffee Break OneShots.

This is quite random and not relevant to my stories, but if you love KyuSung (Kyuhyun and Yesung) then check out this story, if you haven't already: The Hunger.
Without a doubt this is the best fanfiction that I have ever read and the author is such a lovely person! :)