Title: How To Date The Man of Your Dreams: Sangnamja Style Pt.2

Genre: Comedy, Romance, Fluff

Warnings: spit, bodily fluids, little s

Yoongi fanboys over a certain dancer. Hoseok gets his fringe going on until someone sets it on fire a.k.a how Yoonmin and Vhope meet for the first time.

(A/N: I had fun writing this and I think this wouldn't the last of this au. Enjoy!)

Yoongi stares at his laptop screen intently, occasionally bobbing his head to the beat pounding through his headphones. His eyes are glued to the screen and he hasn’t even noticed Hoseok occupying the chair in front of him. If Hoseok hadn’t known any better, he would have thought Yoongi was conjuring up another sick beat for their next underground gig.

But no, Hoseok is sidelined by a dancer named chimchimjams who does covers of Kpop idol choreographies on an online website. The kid is apparently shy, because he covers half of his face with a black mask and his hair with a beanie or a snapback in every video he has done. The only distinguishable aspect about the kid are the tattoos he has: the pair of huge black angel wings on his back and four Chinese characters on his obliques which the kid promptly showed during a body roll and Yoongi had to excuse himself to the bathroom afterwards. Hoseok knows these facts because Yoongi pesters him and Namjoon every time the kid uploads a new video.

Yoongi lifts his head and he raises his left eyebrow. Hoseok motions to the laptop and Yoongi sheepishly closes it. Finally, after fifteen minutes.

Yoongi takes a closer look at Hoseok and notices the grumpy look the younger has and when he reaches to the boy’s hair, he guffaws.

“Who in their right mind would do that to you?” Yoongi can’t stop snickering. Half of Hoseok’s fringe has been burnt into a somewhat rugged emo look. “Good thing they missed your eyebrows!”

Hoseok punches Yoongi’s shoulder hoping that the older would stop. Yoongi only cackles louder. Just then, Namjoon enters the courtyard and sits on one of the chairs. He looks at Hoseok and joins Yoongi who has now forgotten balance and is halfway sliding down his seat. Namjoon produces his phone and takes a photo of a Hoseok red with anger with half of his bangs burnt. He sends Yoongi a copy.

“You’re a bunch of buffoons!” Hoseok screeches. “I can’t believe I’m friends with you.” He pouts.

When the two had relatively calmed down, Hoseok recalls the last few hours of his day.

“And so I had Chemistry Lab, right?” Hoseok says. “I got paired up with a crazy dude who has orange hair and a box grin and he was holding up a blowtorch along with his creepy smile and of course as a good person, I smiled back. Little did I know the kid doesn’t know how to work a Bunsen burner and he ended up lighting it as I was adjusting the knob and boom!” Hoseok pointed at his hair. “The kid only gave me a grin, the creepy one, and he told me he’d buy me food next time we meet which is tomorrow to compensate for the burnt hair.”

Another bout of laughter ensues.

-

Hoseok is currently heading to the school courtyard where he and Taehyung, the guy who burnt half his bangs, agreed to meet for lunch. He just got off from a recording session with Namjoon and Yoongi and he reeks of sweat. Taehyung would later think that he smelled strongly of alpha male pheromones.

“Hyung!” A loud booming voice is what Hoseok hears the moment he steps into the courtyard. He winces as he feels his eardrums slowly deteriorating at the decibels produced by the boy’s vocal chords.

Really, Hoseok is just exaggerating.

Taehyung falls into step with Hoseok as they trudge the way to the older’s table. Thankfully for Hoseok, Namjoon and Yoongi both have classes on the far side of the university. He wouldn’t want to introduce Taehyung to those guys. They’re jerks.

“So, where d’you wanna eat, hyung? Oh, I know! Why don’t we eat at that new burger place downtown? Do you have classes after this or something?” Taehyung blabbers off.

Hoseok tries his best to remember his timetable for the day and he grimaces when he recalls that he has no classes left and he’s free to do anything. Except share lunch with the overeager Kim Taehyung. But the idea of free grease sound like tinkling bells in Hoseok’s ears, and who would turn down free grease. Namjoon, Yoongi, and Hoseok practically worships anything oily and fried because apparently, those food make them real men and real men are real. Yeah, that’s about right, Hoseok thinks.

“I have no classes left.” Hoseok mumbles.

A wide grin seals Hoseok’s fate for the day. He thinks the grin doesn’t look that creepy anymore, endearing would be pushing it too far. Let’s just say the grin fits Taehyung’s handsome face. Hoseok nods his head. Taehyung slings an arm around Hoseok’s neck.

“Onwards, we tread!” The orange-haired boy exclaims. Hoseok isn’t weirded out one bit. He finds himself smiling with Taehyung as they sing nursery rhymes on the way to the burger joint.

-

It turns out Taehyung eats as much as an elephant. They ordered for six people, two servings for Hoseok and four servings for Taehyung. In Hoseok’s defense, he hasn’t eaten breakfast yet. Though Taehyung had already eaten breakfast and a couple of snacks after. Kids and their fast metabolisms.

Oil mixed with a bit of spit was running down the side of Taehyung’s mouth as he kept on blabbering about a friend of his who wanted to know what color yellow and red would be, well of course it was orange, then this friend tried to color Taehyung’s hair, and as the greatest best friend ever, he obliged only to wake up the next morning knowing why his friend asked about the two colors. Orange ended up coloring his mop of hair, though he decidedly accepted the fact it looked good on him and his friend said he would bang 10/10. It was one of the best days of his life, apparently.

Hoseok was fighting to keep his hands to himself and not wipe the drool but his biological functions were not cooperating with his cerebral cortex. He just saw his hands approaching Taehyung’s face and his thumbs running over the younger’s lip then wiping the drool off. Taehyung halted his speech and looked into Hoseok’s eyes and Hoseok swears they were infinite.

Taehyung sported a really cute blush afterwards and Hoseok cooed. . You don’t coo at your date, stupid brain.

“Did you just coo at me?” Taehyung asks, flabbergasted.

Hoseok nods and Taehyung smiles and Hoseok thinks it’s the most beautiful thing in the whole wide world. Taehyung grabs his hand for them to leave and have a more private conversation.

Turns out, Taehyung has harbored a massive crush on Hoseok ever since he saw the older’s performance in the dance club. Hoseok still coos at Taehyung whenever possible and he finds out that Taehyung knows how to light a Bunsen burner, he just wanted an excuse to talk to Hoseok and burning half of his fringe was the ultimate way. Hoseok coos, yet again.

And yes, Hoseok can confirm, Taehyung would bang 10/10.

-

Hoseok and Taehyung are just shy of post-coital recovery when Hoseok asks