“So from one up to ten… What do you think? How do you feel today?”
I didn’t look at him, didn’t meet his eyes. Instead I observed the strange sculpture that was standing on the little black table next to the black armchair he was sitting on. Everything was black, all the furniture in that room we were sitting in was black. Even the sofa I was resting on, in the middle of all those pillows, some were grey, some white, two of them were also black. 
The silence in that room was peaceful. I knew I didn’t need to talk to that person. He was a patient listener. The ticking sound of the black wall behind his armchair was so loud. But other than that it was quiet. I closed my eyes for a second and took a deep breath, listening to the beating of my heart instead. It was not as monotonous as the sound of the clock, it was unsteady, racing, jumping and caused me to swallow hard.

I shrugged my shoulders and decided to take a deep breath, shaky just like my fingers were. Just like my whole body was. “Two… Maybe three…” My voice was so quiet that even I had struggles to hear it. The man in front of me smiled slightly as I opened my eyes, looking at me like he knew how I was feeling. Well, maybe he knew it. But he wasn’t in that kind of situation ever before. And I was sitting here for the tenth week in a row and until last week I was feeling like a One - No matter what I was doing. Eating, sleeping, walking through the streets (never alone of course), watching a movie - I never was able to concentrate on the things I was doing. They were there, the thoughts of that time, twenty-four-seven. 

I looked down at my hands, laying iny my lap, my fingers intertwined, forcefully until they almost began to hurt. But I couldn’t look at him any longer. It was hard. Hard to keep the eye-contact, not only with him, with everybody. 
“That’s good, ___. Two is already a step into the right direction.”
I nodded, without even knowing what I was doing. It just was a mechanical reaction. I had quiet a few of them. It was mechanical when I was nodding, when I was smiling or when I was walking. Because after all I just had to move further, right? Life had to go on, come back to normal.

“Did you already tell him what… Did you speak with him about the money?”, he asked, skipping to the topic I was hating the most, the topic I always tried to avoid. I bit my lower lip and looked at the ring I was wearing, the ring he gave me before all that happened. 
”___, you really should do… Or do you want that to stand between the both of you for the rest of your life?” 
No, that was not what I wanted. But how? How was I supposed to tell him about that? Weren’t there things that were more important?
 

It was the best if I just stayed quiet. Maybe he would forget that I was there when I just stayed silent, made no noise. I was bending my legs until I was able to wrap my arms around them and placed my head in the space between my legs and my upper body. This would be over soon, right? They would find me before it was too late, right? There was nothing to worry about, right? A quiet whimper escaped my mouth, just a weak sob. But still I clenched my teeth and listened to the silence. There was no movement. I just had to stay quiet for a little longer, right? Just until they would find me. And then everything would be okay. Everything would go back to normal. Yeah, if I just began to believe…

“Oh, see who is awake!”, I heard the voice I feared the most, so close that I almost jumped to my feet. But what could I do next? It was still dark, so I couldn’t see anything. And even if I could… I had no chance to run away, no option to leave that place. It was hopeless. I was trapped and there was no way out. What if they couldn’t find me? Or what if it would be already too late when they did? 

I held my breath as I felt his breath on my neck, he was already sitting right next to me. His scent wasn’t human like. Too much alcohol, the scent of cigarette smoke still lingering on him and sweat. It was gross. But I couldn’t freak out. Not again!

My head was still hurting, still bleeding. The red substance was still slowly seeping through the fabric of my shirt, only began to rest when it reached the skin of my arm, tickled it, made me feel uncomfortable. But I still didn’t dare to lift my head. I already could see him, he just resembled my worst nightmare. No, that wasn’t true. I’ve never dreamed about something like this before, about someone like him. I had no idea where he came from, I didn’t even know his name.

“How did my baby sleep, hmm? Did you have a nice rest? Is your head still hurting? Should I bring you some ice?”
My lips began to tremble, the tears were back. To be honest, they’ve never left. They were there for the last hours, maybe even days. I lost track of the time as soon as I got dragged into that dark room. 
“I am sorry. I didn’t want to hurt you. But you know it yourself, I had no other choice”, his voice tried to soothe me, but it was the ugliest sound I’ve ever heard. I just wanted to disappear, snap with my fingers and wush, I would be somewhere else, I would be at home. “Hey, baby. Please don’t be mad at me!” I winced as he placed his dirty hand on my back, it softly. Gosh, what was even wrong with him? How could a person, a human being, act like this?

I again held my breath while his hand found my neck, his cold fingers were holding me forcefully. My breath got faster and I almost screamed when he got hold of my hair and pulled my head back, forced me to look up. I was glad that I was too dark, I couldn’t see him clearly, only the outlines of his statue. But the smell was even more worse, stronger than it was before. I clenched my eyes shut and began to whimper, quietly first, louder with every second that passed by. He came closer until the tip of his nose brushed the skin of my bare neck.

“I wonder…” He pulled away for a little bit and some seconds of silence went by. But before I could recover from that moment he was back, slowly caressing my neck until he placed a little kiss against my skin. I clenched my hands into tight fists, forcing myself not to punch him, right into his face. “I really wonder how much he is willing to pay for your safety. What do you think?”, he whispered on my neck, never letting go of my hair, hurting me even more. “10.000? 50.000? 500.000? Should we play a little game and see how he will react to my offer? I mean, isn’t it great? I will let you go.