A Name For The Taking

 

 

 

Length: 7,036w

Warnings: May contain foul language, and slight violence

 

 

 

Oh Sehun.

 

The name itself already sounded mysterious to me. It gave off a feeling of power and intimidation, it actually made me feel small. I didn’t know how long I’d typed random names on the keyboard trying to see if there was a match; I didn’t even remember how I found his name written on the list of Most Influential People of 2014. All I remembered was the great pressure for my husband and I to live a life of wealth and happiness, and how I had surrendered to Junmyeon’s every being, because even if he was such a mess, even if he did force me to do things and hurt me in ways I didn’t deserve to be, he was mine, and I couldn’t love anyone more than him.

 

And in order to give him the wonderful life he wanted, Oh Sehun had become my only hope.

 

 

 

I didn’t have a hard time learning all about this man, thanks to the internet which had become a pretty good source of information. I had found out Oh Sehun had taken over his deceased father’s electronic gadgets company and became one of the youngest CEOs of this generation. Having graduated from college with a degree in Information Technology, tracking down his bank accounts, duplicating his credit cards and creating a new bank account through the bank’s system weren’t much of a problem for me. Surprisingly though, I didn’t need to sign papers for security reasons, nor did I need an ID for evidence, and this only proved that Oh Sehun was indeed a powerful man.

 

When everything else had been settled, the money surprisingly kept coming, and coming, and in the course of two months, I had over a million won deposited into Junmyeon’s bank account, thousands already spent on food, clothes, and new furniture. Junmyeon was very much excited about how things were looking up, and even if I did feel a bit of guilt, with just a smile on my husband’s face, I couldn’t be any more happier.

 

Then came the day I was to come face-to-face with the CEO himself, and boy was I wrong about anything ever being easy.

 

I didn’t know what to think when I had stumbled upon him at the bank, and when he approached me with piercing eyes that stared straight into my soul, there was nothing else I could say.

 

It turned out that he’d known his identity had been stolen since the day I broke the law, and he’d kept track of my real name and how much money I’ve gotten from him ever since. How could I defend myself when I had been doomed from the very start? I told myself there was no other escape, and as I was about to beg on my knees for forgiveness, I thought I saw his lips break into a small smile.

 

“Come have dinner with me,” he said nonchalantly.

 

I had become dumbfounded at this point. Why was he letting me off the hook? Was this a little test so he could jail me afterwards? I really had no clue. I knew I didn’t have a choice whether to accept or decline the offer of someone whom I committed a crime to, but something in me had made me think that it wouldn’t hurt to say yes.

 

 

It wasn’t hard to admit that Oh Sehun had really nice eyes. His eyes were the type that you couldn’t just look away from; they held onto you as long as they could, and quite honestly, you wouldn’t even want to let go from his stare, which I found myself doing as he strangely opened up to me.

 

He told me a lot of things about himself, but what amazed me were the littlest things, like how he had a thing for photography and loved to play the piano. He was simple, and it puzzled me how he could rent a large boat for himself and sail through the seas but still rather play the xbox or eat hotdogs over foie gras.

 

I told him how I enjoyed going out, that when I wasn’t writing and Junmyeon would be out probably drinking, I’d do a little traveling of my own and explore whatever there was outside, and what used to be just small talk had now led to more interesting conversations. Time flew so fast that when I had glanced at my watch, I realized that we had been talking for four long hours, with another million things to talk about. No one ever thought about bringing up his name and the current situation, but it almost felt like there wasn’t a need to.

 

When dinner ended and he drove me a few blocks from my home that night, I finally had the courage to ask him why he wasn’t angry or having me jailed for stealing his name. He looked at me with a look I couldn’t understand — whether it was pity or wretchedness, it was something I didn’t want to know.

 

“There’s always a reason why people do the things they do, and because you chose to steal my name, I won’t ask you for your reasons, but instead, I want whatever is mine to make a difference in your life..”

 

 

It was the the scent of alcohol that welcomed me home, along with Junmyeon lying lazily on the couch with a large bottle of whisky to his drunken mouth. When I brought him to bed and lied next to him, I felt the familiar discomfort of the close proximity between us sink into my skin, along with the fear that he would hurt me just like every single night. But when Oh Sehun had suddenly filled my thoughts, sleeping didn’t feel as terrifying as it did before.

 

 

~~

 

 

Oh Sehun found me again one night in Seoul. I was sipping on cheap coffee and gazing at an expensive clothing store’s glass window while he was answering his mails through his phone, accidentally bumping into me. I’d been too caught up with staring at the mannequin on display, wearing a fine black blazer that I wondered how it would feel to own such a pretty thing without having to worry about how much it would cost and without having any restraints.

 

Sehun didn’t ask me about that. He didn’t ask me what I was doing next to the building he worked in either. He did ask me if I’ve already taken my dinner, and with a spontaneous lie, I answered, “No, I haven’t.”

 

I didn’t know why I lied, but if I had left early that night, Sehun wouldn’t have taken me to dinner, wouldn’t have talked and laughed with me nonstop, and wouldn’t have brought me home.

 

I woke up the next morning and found a box in front of the doorstep. When I opened it, I thought my eyes had fooled me. I held the blazer in my hands and enjoyed the soft linen slip through my fingers, as if it was made for me. Inside the box was a card written in calligraphy:

 

 

To Luhan,

I think it’s pretty too.

- Oh Sehun

 

 

And in that single moment, I knew what it felt like to own something without costs or restraints: it definitely felt like freedom.

 

After I had managed to hide the piece of clothing from Junmyeon and watch him leave, I took another trip to Seoul to catch Sehun already there, waiting for me in front of his building. The same thing happened for three more days, and at some point, we’ve agreed to make this our little “thing”.

 

Why I had agreed to something so confusing was a mystery I couldn’t understand myself, but if it meant seeing him more often, it wasn’t something that I needed to understand, at least in the meantime.

 

So while Junmyeon was out doing other stuff, I was doing great escapes with Oh Sehun, stealing his name and going on friendly dates with him.

 

Friend wasn’t really a word I could describe Oh Sehun, but he wasn’t exactly an enemy either. He was just someone who stayed with me, and I was glad that I had someone that couldn't be described. But even if we were now comfortable with each other and enjoyed each other’s company, I still thought about telling him why I needed to steal his name. I felt like I owed it to him, because in a way, he was helping me get what I wanted, only it wasn’t what I wanted, but what someone that I loved wanted.

 

I married Junmyeon when I was eighteen. I was young, and quite foolish. But I loved Junmyeon with all my heart; I wanted to give him the world. He made me smile and made me feel like I was something precious. I didn’t realize that as time passed by, after our happily ever after came the real storm. We started hitting rock bottom with our bills, we didn’t have enough cash for rent, which led me to juggle with several part time jobs. After I made a little cash and paid our bills, he’d also spent most of them buying alcohol and wasting himself inside our tiny home. Every time I’d try to stop him, he’d fight and hurt me, then he’d have with me just to fill his own needs. I wasn’t angry at him, but kept wondering to myself if it was my fault that we ended up this way. Then I decided to quit all my part time jobs and get hired as a freelance editor as a jumpstart to earning money once again. But no matter how hard I tried, Junmyeon didn’t think it was enough, that the only choice I had was to do the unthinkable and use people’s names.

 

When I had finally explained everything to Sehun with tears streaming down my eyes, I felt his coarse hand reach for mine, with sincere brown orbs gazing into my exhausted eyes. He never judged me, but instead showed me compassion. None of us spoke about it again.

 

 

~~

 

 

“How strange is it that I’m hanging out with someone who has his name taken away from a stranger and not give a damn about it?” I asked Sehun while sitting on a bench eating hot dogs.

 

He laughed at me and shrugged. “It’s not a big deal to me, Luhan.” He simply answered.

 

“Really, Sehun? I steal your money. How is something like that not a big deal to you?”

 

“…I don’t have anyone else to share it with anyway.”

 

I kept my mouth shut. His eyes crinkled when he smiled, but all I heard was the sound of my own heart shattering like broken glass.

 

 

~~

 

 

After a month of stealing names and “escapes” with Sehun, the sense of guilt had begun to wash over me again. How could I steal money from an innocent man who had nothing but his name? How could I do that to someone who had made me think that money wasn't everything? He was helping me all along, but all I did was take away his possessions and drag him down with me. And maybe, it was time to stop. Maybe I needed something else to do so that I could live without hurting anybody else. And without hurting anybody else, I needed to let go of Oh Sehun.

 

The real question is, would I be able to let go?

 

 

~~

 

 

 

On the night we had dinner at the Japanese restaurant near my house, I knew something was off. We didn’t talk and kept quiet throughout the whole evening. But what was even more peculiar was the way he held my hand under the table, the way his fingers intertwined with mine, almost as if he was longing for something. I was confused at the sudden gesture, but I did nothing to stop it. When dinner was done, I told him we could just walk to my house, and after leaving the restaurant, not another word was said.

 

I was itching to tell Sehun that I was going to stop seeing him, but every time I glanced at him with deep meaningful stares looking back at me, it kept my mouth from saying anything else.

 

That was when I realized my feelings for Oh Sehun were more than just guilt or joy whenever I was with him, and before it could grow into something more, I had to let him go.

 

I paused in the middle of the street and turned to face him. He stopped in front of me as well, like he was about to say something too.

 

"I'm going to stop using your name, Sehun." I told him, the words coming off cold and direct.

 

It took a while for him to register what I’d said, and when it did, it didn’t hit him as hard as I’d expected. “Okay.”

 

“And I’m going to stop seeing you too.”

 

That was when I knew I shouldn’t have spoken too early and found the shock in his eyes.

 

“What?"

 

"I can't do this to you anymore, Sehun. I just needed the money and wanted to live the life Junmyeon wanted, but involving you was my mistake. I'm really sorry for putting you in the middle and putting you through so much trouble, I'm really, really, sorry.”

 

“I don’t understand..”

 

“There isn’t anything for you to understand.”

 

“But I.. I told you that I didn’t care about my money.” He told me, a hint of anger suddenly rising in his throat.

 

“But I do,” I answered. “I care because it’s your money that I’m taking, and it’s starting to hurt me every time I see you with me and my filthy hands, and I don’t want to feel that way anymore. I could just find other ways to earn more money again.”

 

“Then just stop stealing from me,” Sehun said. “Let’s just stay where we are and keep seeing each other.”

 

“I can’t do that either.”

 

“Why not?” He asked.

 

“I can’t see you and remember how much money I’ve taken from you.”

 

“How many times do I have to tell you that my money means nothing to me?”

 

“Sehun, you should be happy that I’m not stealing from you anymore.”

 

“Happy?!” Sehun snapped, causing me to jump a bit in fright. “You don’t know the first thing about happiness when you’re taking yourself away from me!”

 

It was my turn to look at him with surprised eyes. “Sehun…”

 

“God, you really are clueless.” He sighed in frustration. “Can’t you see, Luhan?! You can take away everything from me and I still wouldn’t give a damn!”

 

“Sehun, I don’t—”

 

“What you can’t do is mess with my life, make me fall in love with you, then leave me alone and never come back!”

 

Tears began to fall from my eyes as tears of his own streamed down his cheeks.

 

This was it, the feelings that scared me the most, even more than the fear of being hurt by the husband I cared for.

 

“You.. what?”

 

“I could make your life better.” Sehun croaked through his tears. “I could treat you well. But I need you to let me.”

 

“Sehun… Junmyeon needs me.”

 

“He’s using you,” He argued. “And I know you’re tired of being used.”

 

“But I used you too.” I countered back.

 

“Then keep using me,” Sehun pleaded. “Tell me what you want. Take everything from me and I’ll never get tired.”

 

I couldn’t stop my tears at this moment. I had no idea what I had gotten myself into. The words kept coming out like bullets, shooting me at different parts of my body.

 

“You want my name, don’t you? I’ll give it to you. Take it.”

 

“Sehun, stop.”

 

“Marry me.”

 

I felt my knees weaken. Oh Sehun, the man whose name I’d taken, the man that I had once stolen money from, now wanted to trust me with all his heart and his possessions.

 

“I found someone I want to share my everything with, and it’s you.” Sehun said. “Just leave him, and take my name.”

 

My mind was spinning. Everything was going too fast. It was all so wrong.

 

When I stared into Sehun’s sad crystal eyes, I realized that what he told me was true. He had no one, and I may be everything he had to lose. But maybe he had to lose me in order to find what he really wanted.

 

“I love my husband, Sehun, and without a doubt I know he loves me too. I can’t hurt him.” I said, a tear dripping down one eye.

 

A sad smile appeared on his face, and it only made my heart break even more.

 

“I know. I just.. I love you too.” He whispered.

 

 

~~

 

 

 

Junmyeon was watching a football game on television when I rushed home. I didn’t plan on disturbing him, nor did I even want to start a conversation. So when I quickly walked up the stairs to change my clothes and lie on my bed, I sobbed alone and let sleep take over me, with Oh Sehun crying being the last thing I thought of.

 

 

~~

 

 

Two weeks had seemed faster than usual. Deadlines for revised manuscripts had come sooner, and so had the bills for rent and electricity. What was unusually slow was the pain that was growing inside me, like for one, Junmyeon’s punches and kicks when I’d nagged him about his drinking again. My mouth had earned me another set of fresh bruises on my arms and knees, and it hurt more than it did before, but only because he hasn’t hurt me since I’d stolen money. When he discovered that I had stopped using Oh Sehun’s name, he was back to the usual Junmyeon, the one I loved but the husband that had turned me into his punching bag.

 

But more than anything right now, what hurt the most was being without Oh Sehun’s ardent presence.

 

I thought that everything would be okay once I had cut ties with him, but it only turned out to be one of my biggest regrets.

 

Sometimes when I would go out and travel to Seoul, I’d stop in front of his building just to see if Sehun would come down. Most of the time I would chicken out and run away with the thought of him suddenly appearing in front of me. What would happen if I did see Oh Sehun? I didn't know, but maybe it was best if I didn’t.

 

A glimpse of his face would have been good enough for me, but I needed to keep him at a distance, that way it’d be easier to forget the memories we longed for.

 

 

 

~~

 

 

I knocked once, twice just to make sure.

 

I listened to the heavy raindrops that splattered on the floor while waiting for my heartbeat to steady, hoping that the address I found was the correct one. I couldn’t think straight, not right now with a million thoughts racing through my head and mixed emotions. The tears that had already dried up were once again dampered by another series of slow and small teardrops that fell down my cheeks.

 

It was cold and I was shivering in clothes that didn’t suit the spontaneous weather, but that wasn’t any of my concerns at the moment. The choice of running away had clearly not been an option to me before, but now it seemed as if it was the best decision I’ve ever made.

 

The waiting was long, too long that there may be a possibility of no one answering. I could stand in front of the door all day for all I cared, but right now, all I needed was someone who I knew would never hurt me, the kind of comfort only someone who loved me unconditionally could bring.

 

I knocked in front of his door thinking no one would answer, but still, a part of me wanted to try.

 

When the door did open, the pain of facing Sehun had caught up to me again, the man in front of me mirrored the exact sadness I felt when I left him. When our eyes met, my eyes quickly shifted to my shoes. I couldn’t stand the agony in his eyes when they forced to penetrate me, it was as if he wanted to hit me right where he wanted me to hurt.

 

A long silence filled the atmosphere, the only sound being the raindrops hitting the ground.

 

“I… um,” I spoke, “I need a place to stay.”

 

I thought about how cruel it was to show up in front of Sehun after I’d taken his name and money, and also how I swallowed my pride to appear in front of his door to ask him for such a favor when I did everything I could to destroy him.

 

I was ready for rejection and have him say nasty things to me. I was ready for karma to strike me right then and there.

 

But when Oh Sehun asked if I was okay, I fell on my knees and cried my heart out, with Sehun’s arms bringing me close to where I could hear his heart, beating in sync with mine.

 

 

 

~~

 

 

 

Sehun offered me a glass of water as soon as we entered his room. He also gave me a set of clothes to wear as replacement for my wet ones, and soon after I had changed, he tucked me under his sheets then climbed up the bed next to me, waiting until I had calmed down enough to tell him what happened.

 

When I told him that Junmyeon cheated on me, Sehun responded with a casual ‘I’m not surprised.’

 

It ticked me off a bit, so I scooted away from him until I reached the edge of the bed.

 

“Hey, I’m sorry.. I just.. I knew it was coming. I didn’t mean to offend you.”

 

“Then what exactly did you mean?” I asked as I turned to face him.

 

“I meant that he’s an , a big stupid for hurting you. He’s not worth your love.”

 

“But he is to me. I love him.”

 

“How could you love such a monster?”

 

I sat up and stared questioningly down at Sehun. “If he’s a monster, then what does that make me?”

 

“You’re not a monster,” he defended and sat up as well. “You just did what you could.”

 

“And I hurt you.”

 

“That’s true,” he admitted. “You hurt me when you said you wanted to leave me.”

 

I didn’t know what to say. I couldn’t say I wasn’t going to leave, but I couldn’t say that I will either, even if leaving did sound like the best solution to everything right now.

 

“So what do you plan to do?” Sehun asked. “Are you going to divorce him?”

 

I hated hearing that word. I’ve heard it too many times from my separated parents, and now with the possibility of it happening to me, it was too much to handle at the moment.

 

“I could help in finding a lawyer and fixing the documents.”

 

“You don’t need to. I can do that myself.”

 

“So, is that your plan?”

 

“I don’t know.” I answered bluntly. I didn’t want to think about the pain and the suffering I felt, so I decided to stay safe and answer with uncertainty.

 

Sehun got up from the bed. “You don’t know?” Sehun repeated, almost angry.

 

“No, I don’t know, Sehun,” I sighed as I stood up from the bed and walked to the center of his room. “Everything’s just so complicated now, okay? So, I don’t know.. maybe I will divorce him.. or maybe I could go back home and—“

 

Before I could continue Sehun cursed loudly and fisted his hands in his hair. When he looked back at me, all I saw was the anger in his eyes.

 

“You’ve got to be kidding me?!” He yelled. “Do you really want to go home to that prick?!”

 

“The prick that you’re talking about is my husband! What is so wrong with wanting to go back home and fix things?!”

 

“There’s nothing for you to fix because you did nothing wrong!” Sehun answered, walking towards me. “He should be the one trying to fix things, but I bet he’s too busy ing some other person and leaving you behind!”

 

The emotions I had were too uncontrollable at this point and had caused me to slap him hard on his face. I couldn’t help the tears that strolled down my face as he stared at me with surprise and sadness.

 

I was livid. More than the feeling of betraying someone, I felt like I’ve been betrayed all this time— betrayed by my husband, and me being the own person I betrayed. I a punch on Sehun’s chest. I hit him again as tears continued to stream down my face.

 

“Stop.” Sehun softly said. I didn’t listen, instead I hit him again, and again, with knuckles reaching for his chest and arms every single time. He didn’t try anything to avoid it but held my hands as I struggled. As I tried pulling away from his strong grip, he pulled me into an embrace.

 

I didn’t know what effect he had on me, but I was crumbling in his arms again. The desire of being wanted had become so much stronger when Sehun was close, too close that my head rested on his chest as I sobbed hard with Sehun whispering soft apologies.

 

I felt his hand cup my chin and tilt it upwards to see his face, inches away from mine with his breath tickling my lips.

 

“All I want to do is save you.” Sehun told me.

 

“You need saving more than I do.” I said.

 

“Well, I don’t want to be saved… I only want you.” Sehun whispered.

 

 

When Sehun’s lips reached mine, the least thing I thought about was Junmyeon and the pain he caused me. All I thought about was how much I wanted Oh Sehun too.

 

 

 

~~

 

 

 

I couldn’t sleep. It had been an impossible task, especially when you’re lying on the bed and in the arms of someone you know you shouldn’t be with. Sehun’s arms were draped over me, holding my bare flesh close against his body as I stared into space, thinking of all the things that happened in just the span of one day.

 

It still made me furious how Sehun had still let me into his life without hesitation, even after all the things I never did for him, he still decided to take me in. There was no doubt that he was a good person, but he was a person that I didn’t deserve. I turned to see his angelic face, and I was filled with nothing but regret — I shouldn’t have slept with him, shouldn’t have been friends with him, shouldn’t have used his name for money.

 

But most of all, I shouldn’t have fallen in love with him.

 

And because I was in love with him, I needed to disappear. I needed to run away to somewhere I couldn’t be found and start over again, without him and without anyone else. I needed to leave as soon as I could before I let Sehun find more reasons for me to stay.

 

 

Before completely disappearing, I took my suitcase, kissed Sehun goodbye and left a note on his bedside table, looking at the adoring beauty lying in bed for the last time before stepping out of the bedroom, sure as ever that as soon as I stepped out of his house and his life, I wasn’t coming back.

 

When I had taken a bus to Busan and called my mother, that was when I realized that I had left my heart on the note, in Oh Sehun’s name.

 

 

 

~~

 

 

 

Three weeks was too long a time of waiting, but to me, it was worth it. The pain of Junmyeon’s lies and betrayal had subsided, and the loss of Oh Sehun and his unconditional love still remained but slowly vanished as time passed by. During my stay at my mother’s house in Busan and while I had waited for something of a miracle to happen, I realized that instead of waiting for something to happen, I should have just done things on my own. All I needed was a push, but what was that push? What could motivate me to move on with my life when I’ve lost the person who destroyed me and the person I destroyed?

 

It wasn’t revenge that I wanted to show, but the willingness to stand up again was what I needed to take to heart.

 

Within those three months, I did get up. I managed to make it on my deadlines as a hired proofreader and earned money that was fit for just me. Mother didn’t ask anymore questions about my marriage with Junmyeon but instead chose to comfort me with silence, and I was glad that she understood me so well. They were willing to keep me as long as I wanted, but I felt guilty for giving them a burden and told them that I was going to have to go home eventually, but not permanently.

 

I held the divorce papers in my hands. I read the words, the statements over and over again. These papers held my whole life and kept it in a line, and once that this line is cut, there was no way to put it back.

 

It wasn’t an easy choice to sign the papers, but in order for me to be happy again, for me to be able to stand on my own two feet, I needed to let go of the one person who I thought helped me, but turned out to be the person who let me down the most.

 

 

~~

 

 

I didn’t think a few exchange of phone calls would bring me such nervousness and anxiety. When I had called Junmyeon to tell him things were over between us and that I’d bring the divorce papers soon, I didn’t think he would ask if I could send them today. What was even more unbelievable was how I had said ‘yes’.

 

I brought up all my courage to leave my parents’ house and rush back home, only to figure out that it wasn’t my home anymore.

 

There was that strange ambience that surrounded the atmosphere as soon as I entered the house.  It made me swallow in fright. 

 

“Junmyeon?” I called, asking to see if he was home.

 

I could hear what sounded like shoes stomping on the ground. I thought I also heard a muffled voice, but then again I wasn’t too sure. It wasn’t until I entered the living room that I saw Junmyeon’s familiar figure turned back to me while his hand rested on the small couch.

 

“Junmyeon,” I called, already afraid of what he was capable of doing.

 

“Did you miss me?” He asked with an icy tone to his voice. “Because I did.”

 

“I’m tired of all the lies, Junmyeon. I’m getting out before you can do anything more to hurt me.”

 

A smirk appeared from his lips, and it was the kind that held something deeper, something much more devious and cruel.

 

“But you haven’t even greeted our guest today.”

 

Guest?

 

The beating of my heart was louder than anything else at that moment, and when Junmyeon turned the couch to face me, my knees buckled and the papers slipped from my hands at the sight presented to me.

 

Sehun’s arms and legs had been tied together with a rope while a handkerchief had been tied to his mouth. His eyes were tired and red, but when they stared at me, all I saw was the love that still remained, and it killed me instantly.

 

I wanted to help him, to pull the ropes off him and get him out of the hole that I made, but I froze. I couldn’t move and was petrified. Of course things couldn’t be that easy. I saw Junmyeon pull out a pistol and point it to Sehun’s head as he shut his eyes in pain.

 

“Stop!” I screamed, begging for him to stop.

 

“You know it wasn’t hard to figure out what exactly made you stop stealing money,” He told me. “But then I thought, ‘oh, of course he would stop stealing! He’s already banging him!’”

 

My hands turned into fists at his comment. I threw angry glares his way, but that didn’t help and only made him more willing to shoot Sehun. He pressed the tip of the gun to his head, and even if I wanted to stop looking, I couldn’t.

 

“What do you want?!” I asked angrily, but also as if I was pleading.

 

“What do I want?” He repeated. “Don’t you want something from me?”

 

“But you want something from me too. That’s why you brought us here, right?”

 

He smiled wickedly. “You’re still the smart Luhan I know. It’s simple, really. You and I will both gain from this negotiation I’m going to make.”

 

When he pulled the gun out of Sehun’s head and walked away from the couch, I ran to his aid and knelt before him, trying to untie the handkerchief out of his mouth.

 

“I’ll get you out of here.” I whispered shakily while my fingers trembled as I pulled the handkerchief off his mouth.

 

Sehun took deep breaths before talking. “Just go.”

 

“No.”

 

“Leave. Now.” He ordered.

 

“I’m not leaving without you, okay?” I told him, almost a scream.

 

I had no idea if it was the adrenaline that was talking or me on a panic attack, but I was sure I meant what I said. Sehun seemed to be shocked himself.

 

“Why not?”

 

I looked into his eyes, the same eyes that longed for me three weeks ago, the same eyes that took me to a different world, a different time when everything was wrong but felt so right with him.

 

“Luhan, why not?”

 

“Because I—“

 

Junmyeon came back with a laptop in his hands. He placed it down on the table before painfully dragging me by my neck and pulling me to where the table was.

 

“You’re hurting him!” Sehun growled angrily while he struggled to get off from the chair.

 

Junmyeon ignored him and dropped me in front of the table. Tears streamed down my face as he held my head and made me look at his laptop.

 

“Do you see the bank account? Familiar, right?” He asked menacingly. “This is the same account you’ve been hacking and stealing money from, so I’m sure it’d be easy for you to type just four digits to this pin.”

 

“Why don’t you just ask him yourself.” I spat at him.

 

He hit the back of my head with his gun as Sehun screamed my name and I gasped. I felt my head throb and I could smell the blood dripping from my back.

 

“You don’t think I’ve already tried that? I thought you were much more clever than this.” He pretended to pout. “All I need is the pin, then I’ll let the er go and sign the papers.”

 

“Just do it!” Sehun screamed. I turned to face him with worry, but the look on his face told me that he was fine. “Do it.”

 

Sehun trusted me too much with him, but in that moment, I needed him to.

 

“I won’t do it unless you do what you promise, Junmyeon.”

 

“What are you doing?! Stop!” Sehun begged me. I ignored him.

 

“You’re underestimating me.” Junmyeon said.

 

“Then I’m not doing it.”

 

Junmyeon glared at me before walking over to Sehun. He kicked his stomach and punched his face a few times, while I closed my eyes and bit my lip, tolerating the painful grunts Sehun released. Junmyeon gave him a few more powerful kicks before untying his hands and feet, and I ran to hold him in my arms.

 

I touched his bruised face with tears spilling to his cheeks. “I’m sorry.” I whispered.

 

He smiled achingly even if he was in so much pain, and he was still so beautiful.

 

“I love you.”

 

Before I could tell him the same, Junmyeon had taken a fistful of my hair in his hands and then again I was being pulled over to the table with the laptop. I could feel Sehun watching me from afar, doing the best he could to get up, but his body disagreed with him.

 

As I faced the laptop, I felt the cool touch of metal behind my head again, and Junmyeon’s trembling hands ready to shoot if I disobeyed.

 

I didn’t know what scared me more, the possibility of never seeing Sehun’s face again with the only memory of his tears, or the realization that the one person I promised I’d take a bullet for was the one behind the trigger all along.

 

Four blanks stared at me, waiting for me to fill them with numbers.

 

Without hesitation, I typed the first number with my own tears streaming down my face and Sehun shouting my name in panic. 

 

I typed in the other three numbers, and I knew what was in store for me.

 

The ‘invalid password’ should have been enough signal for me to get shot, but I turned around at the sound of the gun dropping and Junmyeon lying on his back on the ground screaming in pain. Sehun had smashed a vase to his head.

 

Sehun was on his knees, exhausted when he dropped the vase, and the smartest thing I thought of doing was take the gun.

 

The next few seconds happened in still images: Sehun’s arm around my shoulder with his weak body close to mine, the gun facing Junmyeon’s demonic grin with his hand to my stomach, and the image of a man I once knew how to love, dying on the ground with blood spilling out of him like the last few remains of our memories.

 

It wasn't long to figure out that the puddle of blood didn’t only belong to him. I suddenly felt a strong surge of pain rush through me, and when I looked down, I found a knife through my stomach. I choked on my tears while my head was spinning.

 

“No! , no!”

 

I fell on my knees with Sehun bringing me to his arms. I tried to pull the knife out but Sehun held my hand tight, trembling and bursting into tears.

 

“You’re okay, baby,” he pleaded. “Please tell me you’re okay.”

 

The pain was unbearable, and I thought I’d seen a white light.

 

“Why...” Sehun asked faintly. “Why?”

 

“Because.. I..”

 

Before I could look at him, before I could tell Oh Sehun that I loved him, the darkness had already taken me away.

 

 

~~

 

 

I sat quietly on my seat and waited for the calm to settle through me. There were too many things to think about that made me anxious, like my first written children’s book, moving out of my parents  house for the second time, and also, starting another new chapter in a life full of strange and crazy encounters.

 

I felt a hand graze through mine before slowly intertwining our fingers.

 

“You nervous?” a voice asked, and even if it was cold and dark and even if there were a million things to be afraid of, it was a voice I knew I wanted to keep as long as I stayed in this world.

 

“You could say that I guess,” I smiled. “Just a little.”

 

“I’ll let you in on a little secret,” He leaned close until his breath reached my ear. “I am too.”

 

I smiled at Sehun’s silhouette in the darkness. He was still so perfect to me even after all these years, so perfectly flawed that his tiny imperfections were what made me fall in love with him.

 

“I still can’t believe this is happening.” Sehun admitted. “It was as if it was yesterday when I told you to marry me for the first time.”

 

“But I wasn’t ready that time,” I frowned.

 

“I know,” he said. “But I knew I was still going to marry you, even if you had Junmyeon back then.”

 

I smiled weakly at the thought of him, but he was in a better place, a much safer place that didn’t corrupt him with greed and power.

 

“And look where we are now.” Sehun grinned sheepishly, his eyes crinkling in a very cute way that I couldn’t help but laugh at him. “So, tell me why you did you accept me now?”

 

I looked at him with adoring eyes. “Because I love you.”

 

Sehun leaned forward as I did the same, and our lips met in a chaste and wonderful kiss. When I pulled away, he gave me a look of passion and love that I’ve always wanted, and I’ve never been so contented.

 

“We’ll get through it, right?” I asked him, a bit of worry tugging in my heart. “The future? No matter what happens, you’ll stick with me until the end?”

 

“As long as you stick with my name, baby, I’ll stick with you.”

 

I giggled and raised my hand to search for his face before kissing it.

 

“As if I have a choice.” I .

 

He stuck his tongue out before opening the door of the car with the subtle light creeping in.

 

Oh Sehun climbed out of the car before facing me and offering his hand.

 

“Ready, Mr. Oh?” He asked, a slight teasing to his voice with one of his beautiful smiles.

 

I felt my heart quicken at the thought of my name and his name together for the first time, and how for the first time it sounded so right.

 

“I’ve never been more ready in my life, Mr. Oh.”

 

I took his hand as I stepped out and linked my arm with his while making our way into the reception. As we were greeted by guests, welcomed by families and in-laws, as we danced and shared new memories together, I kept Oh Sehun and a name that was now mine to take.

 

 

~~

 

 

 

Author's Note: Thank you so much for reading<333 Your comments are greatly appreciated :)