He always needed to be different than the others who surrounded him. Even in his childhood, he wanted to be loved and respected by everyone. He wanted attention, willing to pay big prices to get it.

To be in a centre of interest, to be looked at by everyone.. but deep inside of himself, all he craved for was someone who would truly respect him, love him and give him the real home he had never had a chance to have, his father disappeared when he was a child and his mother, having him and his elder sister, was stressed all the time because of lack of money and fear she was living in day by day, simply wasn't able to give him as much love as every child deserves. Someone who would understand him. 

That was the substance of his behaviour.

Being noticed.

Living with two women had some effects on him, but most probably he simply was born to be the way he was. He never really enjoyed typical boy games, fights and so and he even liked to pretend to be a girl himself, subliminally hoping that it could change something. 

He realized he was more into boys than girls when he was about sixteen years old and even had some boyfriends. It wasn't hard to get them because of his beautiful face, in that age more feminine than manly and his tiny attractive body. He never had enough courage to allow himself to realize that the most of them wanted only his body, someone who seemed to be so damn easy to get. Nobody cared about him and nobody wanted to understand. 

A few years later, when he was adult, everyone in the city knew him as the infamous Kim Heechul - gay, person who has only a few steps to become addicted to alcohol, who doesn't have any problem with one night stands... That side he showed to everyone, the poker face he had, pretending not to care. Because even if he showed his real feelings, would it change anything? 

He never was in love, the real one with butterflies, pink glasses and all the great feelings, he only had a few crushes but the most of them didn't want him. He usually stopped to think about them as his possible lovers very soon. But one of them was an exception. 

Choi Siwon, the only one he knew he couldn't have because they both were standing on opposite sides of the barrier. 

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Okay guys, this is not the plot yet, it is just something like a foreword that is supposed to explain Heechul's behaviour in the story. So yeah... the next update will be the same but for Siwon. :)