A/N: I decided to write a proper epilogue in the end. I would've updated yesterday, but I started watching Show Me the Money, then House was on TV, and then I thought it was a good idea to edit my tumblr tags until midnight.

Enjoy!

Spring passed by faster than expected. Stuck in a whirlwind of school work, music practice, soccer and the (stressful) upcoming graduation, Donghae can’t tell when May ended and summer began; nor when June turned into August. The only way he keeps track of time is by the number of dates he had with his boyfriend – which were only once a week (too rare in his opinion, but he should be thankful considering how much Hyukjae loathes leaving the house).

This year’s summer is unforgiving: the temperatures are way too high, the hot air makes it hard to even breathe and the sun seems to be on a mission to burn them all. Donghae wants to leave everything and escape to a forest for the rest of the school break. He spends his days taking cold showers every other hour, drinking icy water and hiding in his cave-like bedroom.

He only goes out in the evenings, when it gets cool and the sun is no longer melting everything. He walks to his best friend’s house every evening, without fail; not that his purpose is visiting Sungmin. Donghae is only interested in seeing Hyukjae, who happens to be his best friend’s brother.

It’s been four months since he and Hyukjae got together, but Donghae still can’t believe they’re lovers, finally. He wakes up every morning eager to text Hyukjae and confirm it’s not just a cruel dream. He visits Sungmin’s house every day, because he can’t get enough of his boyfriend.

Hyukjae is less enthusiastic than Donghae, if the younger is excited at all about their relationship. He doesn’t seem like it and if Hyukjae does care about it, he does an excellent job at hiding it. He rarely texts Donghae first, he never calls and when they’re together, he talks little and engages in physical contact only when Donghae is the one to initiate it.

Donghae often wondered if Hyukjae is still angry at him for the misunderstanding that broke them apart in the first place. It was a long time ago and Donghae apologized over and over again for being a ; Hyukjae brushed it off, told him to forget about it. They moved on. Other times, Donghae was sure Hyukjae is not very fond of him, sure the younger doesn’t like him half as much as Donghae likes him. But then why would Hyukjae be his boyfriend if that were the case?

“You’re thinking too much,” Sungmin told him when Donghae confided in him. “That’s just how Hyukjae is.”

“But he wasn’t like this before,” Donghae argued. “You know, before that incident …”

Sungmin sighed, putting a comforting hand on his shoulder, “Time passed since then and people change along with it. Hyukjae did so. He’s introverted now and he has a hard time expressing his feelings. Trust me, I know.”

So Donghae believed in his best friend’s words, because he’s his boyfriend’s brother and he knows best. Instead of moping around and hesitating, Donghae took it upon himself to make their relationship work. It was his fault for what happened anyway. And it seemed to work, judging by Hyukjae’s reactions to his out-of-nowhere hugs, surprise kisses and never-ending babbling. Flustered, the younger would act annoyed, but do nothing to push Donghae away or hide the happy grin blossoming on his face.

And so, Donghae knows they’re okay.

~*~

“You’re drooling,” Sungmin says, very much amused.

“Can you blame me?” Donghae replies without taking his eyes off his half-, wet boyfriend. “Your brother’s damn hot!”

Sungmin laughs out loud, turning a few heads towards him. “I wouldn’t know. He’s my brother.”

It’s probably the hottest day of the year so far. Sungmin proposed they go to the pool; a good way to avoid heat and have fun at the same time. So here they are, Donghae and Sungmin lounging on sunbeds on the side, taking shelter under umbrellas while Hyukjae and three of his friends are playing volleyball in the pool.

Donghae decides he should look away from his boyfriend’s flexing back and abs before he gets a .

“Why don’t you go join him?”

Donghae scoffs. “Like I’d be able to keep my hands to myself. Besides, he’s having fun with his friends. I don’t think he’d appreciate me barging in.”

“Wow, Donghae! I’m impressed!”

“I am a considerate person, thank you very much!”

His statement is loud enough to reach Hyukjae’s ears, who turns at the sound of his boyfriend’s voice. He throws Donghae a questioning look. The older feels flattered at the concern in Hyukjae’s eyes, a fuzzy, warm feeling taking over his chest. Though shy in expressing his feelings verbally, the younger never hesitates to show his care and affection through small actions or gestures; just like now – interrupting the game to make sure his boyfriend is all right.

Donghae smiles in a fashion Sungmin would call “sickeningly sweet” and mouths “Nothing” to Hyukjae. “Sure?” Hyukjae mouths back. Donghae sends him a flying kiss as an answer, laughing to himself as the younger turns to his friends with red cheeks.

“Have you decided what you’re gonna do about college?” Sungmin asks, eyes on his brother. He then turns to Donghae with a raised eyebrow. “Well?”

Donghae sighs, looking anywhere but at the Lee brothers. College – that word alone is enough to ruin his day. If asked the same question last year, Donghae would’ve answered without hesitation, excited and impatient to leave their town and move to the big city. Now, he’s not so sure anymore.

His eyes trail back to Hyukjae, a fond smile pulling at his lips. “Kind of,” he says. “I’m thinking about holding back a year.”

“Why in the world would you do that?!” Sungmin screeches, sitting up. “Do you have any idea how many opportunities and precious time you’ll be wasting?”

“I do. I just …” Donghae hesitates, choosing his words carefully. He knows Sungmin won’t approve no matter what he says, but he hopes his friend will at least understand his reasoning. “Hyukjae has finally given me a chance. I don’t want to screw it by going away, even if it’s for college; at least not until we have a stronger bond. Distance ruins relationships, you know?”

“If distance is all it takes to break you apart, your relationship wasn’t that successful to begin with.”

Leave it to Sungmin to break your heart, Donghae thinks, tears gathering in his eyes. He brings an arm over his face to conceal them; not from Sungmin (he doesn’t care if his friend sees him crying), but from Hyukjae.

It’s not like he doesn’t know that already. Donghae is aware they’re only at the beginning and it won’t always be rainbows and unicorns – it never has been for him and Hyukjae – but he likes to hope they’ll learn to solve problems that may occur. But how can they do that if they have no time?

“Look, Donghae,” Sungmin says, bringing his bed closer to him. “I didn’t say that to make you doubt your relationship. I’m your best friend and I have to be honest with you, even if that means hurting your feelings. You’re my best friend, my soulmate, and Hyukjae is my brother. I love you both and I want what's best for you.”

“I know,” Donghae mutters. “Thank you, Sungmin.”

“Did you tell Hyukjae yet?”

“No. How do you think he’ll react?”

“He’ll probably say you’re an idiot.”

~*~

“You’re a ing idiot!”

Donghae winces. He hates how Sungmin is always right.

“What goes around in that head of yours?!” Hyukjae fumes in front of him, pinning Donghae in place with his glare alone.

“You mostly,” Donghae says with the cheesiest smile he can muster. It falls off his face when he meets his boyfriend’s eyes. “I’m serious, Hyukjae.”

The younger throws his arms in the air. “I know you are, Donghae.” The way Hyukjae says his name, patronizing and belittling, hurts Donghae. It hurts because he realizes Hyukjae doesn’t take him seriously - he never did and he never will. Donghae wishes desperately for Hyukjae to take him seriously. “That’s why I’m so angry,” the younger continues. “Because I know you are serious.”

Donghae groans and throws himself on Hyukjae’s bed. “I don’t get it,” he says, staring at the ceiling. “I thought you’d be happy. You know, since I obviously value you more than college. What’s the big deal anyway?”

Hyukjae ignores his confession. “So what do you plan on doing home all this time?” He takes a seat at his desk and crosses his legs. Donghae wonders if standing so far from him is another way to show how much Hyukjae is upset.

“I could get a job.” Donghae shrugs. He hears Hyukjae snort at him and he grins, amused that his boyfriend knows as well as he does that’s probably not going to happen. “I could do that … save some money. And after you graduate we’ll leave together.”

“Donghae, you want to study music right?” The elder nods. “Well sorry to break it to you, but music is not something you can postpone. If you want to achieve anything with music, you’ll have to make the most of every minute you have.”

“You’re overreacting …”

Hyukjae raises his voice, startling Donghae. “Am I? Do you think you’ll become Mozart by working at McDonald’s? You might as well start playing on streets! With a bit of luck, you’ll be the next Justin Bieber!”

The younger gapes at his own words, not intending to be this harsh, but the damage is already done. Donghae sits up and looks at his boyfriend with tears in his eyes.

“Donghae—“

 “Why are you so mean to me?! Am I too clingy, is that it? Is my love a burden to you?”

“No, that’s not—“

“Why don’t you just break up with me if I’m such a bother?!”

“Donghae, listen to me …”

Donghae does not want to listen though. He’s hurt and crying and wants to be run over by a car. Hyukjae showed him one more time how little he cares about him and Donghae has had enough. He does not want to hear any more cruel words leaving Hyukjae’s mouth.

He jumps from the bed and storms out of his boyfriend’s room. He bumps into Sungmin in his haste to leave the house, who tries to stop him and find out what happened. Donghae pushes past him and runs home.

Once under the protection of his bed, soft pillows, and stuffed animals, he cries himself to sleep.

~*~

Soft knocks on his door interrupt his slumber. His mother’s gentle voice follow soon after.

“Donghae, baby, are you awake? You skipped dinner. Should I bring you some food?”

Donghae hears them all as if he’s still dreaming. He can barely open his eyes, the drowsiness making it hard to distinguish between reality and reverie.

His mother enters the room and Donghae awakens enough to become aware of what a mess he is; his eyes should be red and swollen from all the crying and he doesn’t want his mother to see him like this. He is not ready to talk about it.

“Not hungry,” he mumbles, burying his head under the pillows.

His mother takes the hint and leaves.

Donghae lets out a deep sigh as he resurfaces, his hands feeling the night stand in search for his phone. 21:15. He’d usually be with Sungmin and Hyukjae at this time.

At the thought of his boyfriend, guilt envelops Donghae from all extremities. Maybe he should’ve stayed and talk things out - that’s what normal couples do. Deciding he can’t sleep without patching things up with Hyukjae, he unlocks his phone and looks for the younger’s number. He vaguely hears the front door opening and his parents talking to someone while he tries to come up with a monologue to recite to his boyfriend.

Who would disturb at this hour? Don’t they know it’s rude? he thinks, dialling Hyukjae’s number.

He brings the phone to his ear and bites his lip as he waits for the call to connect. The first ring has his eyes darting all over the room; with the second ring, his free hand fumbles with the sheets; by the third, Donghae is ready to bounce off the walls.

Music starts playing right outside of his bedroom; music that sounds awfully similar to Hyukjae's ringtone. Before Donghae can doubt his sanity, fingers knock on his door and Hyukjae's voice speaks over the ringing in his ear and the still blasting ringtone outside.

"Donghae, it's me."

Donghae jumps from the bed and almost forces the door out of its hinges as he swings it open. It really is Hyukjae. Donghae throws himself in his lover's arms without blinking and Hyukjae embraces him with just as much ardour.

"You can stop calling now," the younger says, his breath tickling Donghae's ear and Donghae laughs out loud, because he has his sassy boyfriend back. He can take it, he thinks, Hyukjae's sarcasm, mean jokes, and superiority complex; as long as he can stay by his side. Not being with Hyukjae hurts him more than his lover's harsh words, especially since Donghae knows the younger does not do it on purpose.

The phone stops on his own. Donghae plasters himself closer to his boyfriend, enjoying the peace and quiet, and Hyukjae's warmth around him. He would've stayed longer like that if not for his mother peeking from around the corner. Sticking his tongue out at her, he pulls Hyukjae in his room and shuts the door behind them.

"Donghae, I'm sorry for what I said," Hyukjae says as soon as they're inside.

Donghae smiles at him and pulls him on the bed, facing each other. "It's okay. I know you didn't mean it. I'm sorry too for running away like that."

"You got it all wrong, you know." Hyukjae takes Donghae's hands in his, holding them together between them. Donghae's heart starts racing as if it's the first time they touch. He'll never get enough of the rush Hyukjae makes him feel. "I'm not against you staying because I'm sick of having you around; not even close. I just want what's best for you."

"And I just want to be with you. What's wrong with that?" Donghae asks softly. He's done arguing. He genuinely wants to understand and he's glad Hyukjae is making an effort to have a peaceful, heart-to-heart talk.

“Well, for starters, your idea of relationships is all off.” Donghae’s offended gasp has Hyukjae laughing. “You shouldn’t jump in a relationship thinking it’s going to last forever. You shouldn’t force things better either. If it doesn’t work out, then it’s not meant to be. Life’s a and happens; who knows where we’ll be a year from now? We should just enjoy our time together and make the best out of what we have at this moment. Do you follow?”

Donghae nods dejectedly. It’s not like he sees himself married to Hyukjae, having kids and a dog … not at all. Despite his foolish fantasies, he realizes Hyukjae is right, though. He stressed so much about the future that he forgot about today.

“Another thing,” Hyukjae continues. “Just because we’re a couple doesn’t mean we should be doing everything together. You have your life and I have mine. We shouldn’t neglect them just because the other has other plans.” The younger gives Donghae a pointed look, waiting for some kind of confirmation.

“Okay, I get it! I’ll … I guess I’ll go to Seoul after all,” Donghae grumbles, still not fond of the idea.

“It’s just a year, Donghae. You’ll survive. I’ll be there with you before you know it.”

“I know … I guess I was being over-dramatic.”

“Yes, you were.” Hyukjae laughs. The sound of it has Donghae chuckling as well.

“I was just worried we’ll drift away from each other,” Donghae confesses, crawling into his boyfriend’s lap. It’s his turn to do the talking and he wants Hyukjae to pay attention to him and him only. “I really like you a lot, Hyukjae. But you never call or text, you never seem willing do to stuff together … I thought that if I stop being the one with the initiative, you wouldn’t even notice. So I took it upon myself to keep things going.”

Hyukjae bows his head slightly, making it hard for Donghae to see his expression. The elder gulps and considers apologizing; he didn’t mean to make Hyukjae feel bad. Before he can say anything, Hyukjae surprises him by locking his arms around his waist, bringing their bodies glued together. Donghae brings his own arms around the younger’s neck on instinct.

“I’m sorry,” Hyukjae murmurs, shame dripping from his voice. “I never meant to make you feel insignificant. I really like you a lot, too.” His words send a million butterflies into Donghae’s belly. “I don’t do it on purpose, you know. I don’t wake up every day thinking What a fine day to ignore my boyfriend! I just don’t feel the need for human contact. I barely talk to Sungmin too and we live in the same house.”

In spite of the emotional moment, Donghae can’t help but laugh. He laughs at Hyukjae and his struggle to hold a conversation without being y, and he laughs in happiness. Hyukjae cares about him just as much as Donghae cares about him and that makes his heart ready to soar.

“You’re so silly,” he says, raising his head from Hyukjae’s shoulder.

Hyukjae scoffs, pinching his sides. “You’re the silly one.”

“… shut up and kiss me.”

7 MONTHS LATER

“Come on, kids! Time to go!”

Donghae huffs as he drags his luggage outside, where the brothers’ parents are waiting. Hyukjae follows behind him with two other bags.

“Did you pack your whole room?” the younger groans as he throws the bags in the car.

“At least I’m not taking any furniture with me,” Donghae says, pointing at Sungmin who struggles to carry a bean bag and a book stand at the same time.

“Shut up, midget!” Sungmin shouts. “I’m surprised you didn’t try forcing Hyukjae in a suitcase.”

“Don’t be rude, Sungmin,” his mother scolds.

“He was rude first!”

“But he’s our guest. Now cut it off and get in the car.”

As Sungmin follows his mother’s orders (muttering something about Donghae being their guest since middle school), Donghae remembers he has more important things to do than fight his best friend; and that is make out with his best friend’s brother for a last time.

Hyukjae seems to be on the same wavelength. He embraces Donghae and kisses him for a long minute, without any shame for his family.

“Call me when you get there,” he says when they part their lips, not without effort and reluctance from both parts.

Donghae nods, smiling happily. A few months ago he imagined this day as a sobbing, bitter goodbye; he even expected to cry. He was just being a drama queen, he now realizes. There’s nothing to be sad about (except the lack of making out).

Hyukjae bumps their noses together affectionately and gives him one last, lingering kiss. “Take care,” he whispers into his mouth, leaving Donghae the impression that he’s the one who doesn’t want to let go now.

“I’ll call you every morning,” Donghae says, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “And every night. And text you in between.”

Hyukjae laughs and pushes him towards the car.

Donghae gets in, ignores Sungmin’s mean comments and his mother’s scolding as the father starts the car and turns to wave off his boyfriend. He keeps staring at Hyukjae’s shrinking figure until they leave the street.

Ten minutes later, when they didn’t even leave the town, Donghae receives a text.

I already miss you.