“I love you Kibum.” 

Jonghyun kissed him and stared to the face that flushed in red. Both of them breathed calmly after the hot steamy session. Jonghyun going to fly to Japan tomorrow because of the crew will be shooting a scene there. Kibum looked at the latter with confused feeling. Kibum loves the feeling of the long finger of Jonghyun playing with his tail, making him purred.

‘Love? What is love actually?’

Kibum caressed the broad shoulder in front of his and smiled. His eyes already half lidded, showing that he will sleep anytime. This is the first time they will stay apart from each other. Jonghyun will stay in Japan for one week because of his new movie.

“Make sure you eat well and you are only mine, remember that.” Jonghyun smiled and pushed slightly the button nose of Kibum. Kibum still stared at him with that looks. It’s been five months now they keep seeing each other and Jonghyun feels that he really loves this person. He loves Kibum and he wants him to know that.

Kibum nodded and cuddled the person more. The words just fly away, drifted by his drowsiness. Jonghyun kissed the forehead once and caressed the cheek. Kibum looks confused just now when he said the love words but he cannot help it. He will be away. He will explain to Kibum once he back from Japan.

The next morning was feeling a bit weird. Normally, Jonghyun will shower him with kisses but today there’s none. Jonghyun already went to the airport and left him. He pull out the sheet and  prepare the bed. Then, after cleaning himself, he eats the cereal for breakfast. Usually he doesn’t have to do it. How Jonghyun loved to pamper him. A thought popped up suddenly while he eats.

Love. Jonghyun said about love last night. But what is the meaning of that thing actually?

Kibum go to work as usual. He working on the wood panel, wanting assemble it for the floor. Jinki suddenly tapped his shoulder, giving him the bottle of water. He dropped the drill and wiped his sweat. He sits down next to his friend, Jinki.

“You are very quiet today. Is there anything happen between you and the- the actor... ugh, I mean Jonghyun-shii?” Jinki still awkward every time he wants to talk about Kibum and his sleep partner matter. It is almost like an earthquake in his head when Kibum said that Jonghyun can also shifted to something.

“No.”

Kibum gulping the water, feeling it down to his throat. Jinki just nodded weirdly, as he looked at the blank expression of Kibum. “What is love?” Kibum looked at Jinki now, seeking for answer from him. Jinki stunned a bit as this is the first time he heard about love from this person. “Love is… errr. Love is love.” Jinki smiled and still thinking how he wants to explain it further. He his hair backwards, thinking. Kibum just drink the water again and wiped his sweat. He still doesn’t get it.

It’s been three days and Kibum wake up this morning from the sofa. Sleeping alone on the big bed, he feels alone and sad. Yesterday he sleeps at Jinki's house because he cannot afford to feel the loneliness in him. Today, he sleeps at sofa, knowing that the bad isn't cozy anymore. Jinki suggested him to buy a phone so that they can contact with each other. Yeah, he will after this.

This is the sixth day and Kibum just cannot afford to live anymore. He felt the emptiness. Kibum walked outside in his favourite grey sweater. He walks through the silent night, not knowing where to go. Someone was smoking at the end of the alley. The guy’s figure looks a lot like Jonghyun. How he stand while letting the smoke of cigarette in the air. Jonghyun did not smoke but the way the guy stands making Kibum smile and feel attracted.

He still walks until he is getting near to the male. The person look at him as someone shadow passing him. Kibum look at the person. Even the height looks similar.

“What? Want some?” The guy showed the half burned cigarette to him. Kibum shooks his head slowly and letting out a small chuckle. His nose tainted with red because of the colds. The male look at Kibum interestingly and he throw the cigarette away, pressing it with his shoe.

“Then why?” The male smirked suddenly, as he tried to be friendly and he put one of his hand on Kibum’s shoulder.

“You are interesting.” Kibum’s voice sound so excited and suddenly the male his figure and pinned to the brick wall at the secluded area. The alley look a bit dark, as the street lamp failed to light up. Kibum huffed and he kissed the figure in front of him.

The guy kissed him back harshly and nibbled his lower lips. He was rough and suddenly he can feel the guy’s knee making