“You’re really leaving?”

“I don't have much of a choice, do I?” The brunette asked while neatly placing her clothes into the box she had brought along with her.

“Jessi,“ said girl flinched at the tone her friend had used. She knew exactly why her friend was there but before any other words were uttered, she knew she had to be firm.

“Tiffany, let’s not make this even more difficult.”

Right then, Tiffany knew it was pointless to get her friend to stay.

*

Tiffany made her way to Taeyeon’s room next. The latter was busy colouring the cartoons on her colouring book. Tiffany noticed the three other worn-out colouring books neatly stacked on the study table. She pulled out a chair and sat next to Taeyeon.

“She’s almost done packing. She’ll probably leave tomorrow morning.”

“And?”

Tiffany sighed; it was difficult being the middleman. She couldn’t take any sides and she had to use a neutral, non-accusatory tone.

“Taeyeon-ah, she’s leaving. Are you not feeling guilty at all?”

Taeyeon stopped colouring the sun and placed the yellow colour pencil down.

She turned around, her body now facing Tiffany. She looked into Tiffany’s eyes, hoping she could at least convey some of the feelings she was feeling but all she could whisper was, “Fany-ah, can you leave me alone?”

The eye-smiling girl saw the pained look in her friend’s eyes. With a heavy heart, she stood up and gave a reassuring pat on Taeyeon’s slumped shoulders.

“Himnae, Taeyeon-ah.”

She then made her way out but she didn’t miss seeing the tear that had fell from Taeyeon’s eyes.

*

Jessica was still not done packing and it was already 2:30 am. She was exhausted both mentally and physically. She had been clearing her room for the past 6 hours and was finally left with clearing her study table.

She had purposely left the study table last because she knew of the pictures, hand-written messages, cards and gift boxes that were kept in the drawers. Jessica looked at her bad, the temptation to just crash was pretty strong but she couldn’t. She has to leave this place first thing in the morning. If possible, she had planned to leave before her members wake up.

After doing some breathing exercises and stretching her strained back, Jessica made her way to the study table. Knowing it was going to be difficult for her to keep her balance later on, she wisely sat on the chair.

Her table was cluttered with notebooks, design sketches, calendars, planners, and stuffed toys yet; only one thing caught her attention. She gingerly reached out for the Polaroid picture of her and Taeyeon. There was a date scribbled at the bottom of the picture. 29/09/09

*

She remembered that particular day clearly. The girls were rehearsing for Dream Concert and Jessica was particularly angsty on that day because she had barely gotten enough sleep the previous night.

At the end of the practice, Tiffany took out her pink Polaroid camera and asked everyone to huddle together to take a group picture. None of them had noticed that both Taeyeon and Jessica were missing from the picture until after it was taken.

The duo had snuck out into another practice room to get some rest. Jessica had drifted off into dreamland with her head resting on Taeyeon’s thigh. Taeyeon too was asleep and had her back resting against the wall.

The next thing Jessica knew, there was a flash and she scrambled up onto her feet only to find 7 giggling girls and the culprit, Tiffany and her pink Polaroid.

“Aigoooo you guys look so cute together!” Tiffany squealed like a fangirl when the picture had been fully processed. The picture was of the two sleeping soundly.

“Yah, Sica! We thought you two had went off to do some hanky panky stuff!” Sooyoung yelled and received a glare from Jessica.

Taeyeon who had finally decided to wake up, was puzzled to see 8 girls crowding in front of her.

“What are you guys looking at?” She asked.

“Tae-tae! You look so cute when you’re sleeping!” Tiffany exclaimed with her loud voice and started flashing the picture in front of Taeyeon.

Taeyeon finally saw the picture. She had a frown on her face.

“Sooyeon-ah, let’s take another picture together.”

Jessica was surprised with the request. They hadn’t even showered and were far from looking like a celebrity but heck, it’s a photo with Taeyeon, her best friend. Nothing could go wrong.

Taeyeon pulled Jessica closer to her and Tiffany once again became the photographer.

“Alright, 1, 2-“

And before Tiffany snapped the picture, Taeyeon leaned in to kiss Jessica on the cheek. Jessica was shocked. Taeyeon had never made any bold moves like this before.

‘Maybe she’s just sleepy.’ Jessica thought.

The photo turned out well despite it being a candid one.

“You can keep this photo and I’ll keep this.” Taeyeon handed Jessica the recent photo and kept the one with the two sleeping in her wallet.

*

Jessica had a small smile on her face while staring at the Polaroid.

‘I doubt we can ever have a photo like this again. Are we that awkward now, Taeyeon-ah?’

She kept the Polaroid in a heart-shaped box she had found in her closet earlier on. Next, she opened the first drawer. It was filled to the brim with hand-written messages. Most of them were from her members, some were from her sister but there were quite a number of light blue coloured papers. She knew exactly who were they from. She picked a few up and read them.

“Sica-yah, remember to smile even when times are hard.”

“Our ice princess, stop the snow and let the sun come out! I’m freezing!”

“Jung Sooyeon, remember that I would bet my life on you.”

“Jung Sooyeon, I’ll be your scarecrow.”

“Sooyeon-ie~ shall we be friends forever?”

“Right now it’s~~~ TAENGSIC SHIDAE!!!”

“Saranghae babo-yah~”

Jessica was eventually sobbing after reading the pile of light blue coloured papers she had picked up. She didn’t even know when she had started crying. Similarly to the Polaroid, she placed all the hand-written notes into the heart-shaped box.

She opened the second drawer. This particular drawer was filled with gift boxes, be it big or small. She picked up a rectangular box and opened it. She couldn’t help but to let out a soft chuckle.

“Since you got me a pen for my birthday, here’s one for you.”

It was a fountain pen with the word, “TaengSic shidae” engraved on it. She placed the box into the heart-shaped box. Jessica was about to pick up a velvet box that she didn’t remember even putting it there when she was interrupted by a knock on her door.

She looked at the clock, 03:09 am. Jessica made her way to her room’s door and opened it. She was enveloped into a tight hug.

“I’m sorry Sooyeon. I’m really sorry. Please don’t go.”

Jessica was stunned. The girl who was hugging her was the one who had told her to leave yet; she’s here begging Jessica to stay.

“Shhh Taeyeon-ah, calm down.”

Not wanting to disrupt the sleep of her group members, she pulled the smaller girl into her room and closed the door. After settling the older one onto her bed, she grabbed the chair at her study table to place it in front of Taeyeon.

Taeyeon was still a sobbing mess. Not knowing what to do, Jessica merely sat in front of Taeyeon.

“Are you not going to comfort me at all?” Taeyeon’s question was like a stab to Jessica’s heart.

Jessica shifted her gaze away from Taeyeon. “If you’re here to get my sympathy, you won’t. You told me to leave. I’ll leave first thing tomorrow morning.”

Taeyeon, unhappy that Jessica was not looking at her, gently cupped Jessica’s face to get her to face Taeyeon. “Sooyeon-ah, I miss you.”

“Isn’t it too late? You agreed to the company’s saying I should leave because the company sees my business as a threat.”

“I really do miss you, my best friend.”

“Kim Taeyeon, listen. You have a special place in my heart but I’m hurt Taeyeon. I’m hurt. We’ve been so awkward and distant for the past few years. Was our friendship something you could have easily thrown away? Was it a joke?”

Taeyeon kept shaking her head and when she was about to talk, a finger was placed on her lips.

“You cannot treat me like this Taeyeon. You cannot just tell me you miss me after telling me to leave this place, this group, this dream of mine. You cannot call me your best friend when you were never there for me when I was down.”

“But I was there for you!”

“That was years ago, Taeyeon-ah.”

“I’m sorry Sooyeon. I can try to fix this. I’ll talk to the managers and the company tomorrow. Please, don’t leave me.”

“What’s been said cannot be taken back.”

“But we need you.” There was tinge of begging in Taeyeon’s voice.

“Maybe, this is the best for us.” Jessica was firm and Taeyeon knew Jessica wasn’t going to back down.

“Can I sleep here tonight? Like old times?”

Jessica didn’t even get to answer her because the older girl had made herself comfortable on the brunette’s bed. Jessica had a few choices, to kick Taeyeon out, to continue packing or give in to her tired body and get some rest with Taeyeon.

She chose the last choice. The bed was big enough for the two anyway. They were facing each other when Jessica broke the silence.

“Taeyeon-ah, do you remember my line in Divine?”

“You had a couple of lines. Which is it?”

“We are always one.” With that said, Jessica gave a light kiss on Taeyeon’s forehead before snuggling into the crook of her neck. 

Well, at least it wasn't that sad, right? 

I was totally inspired by this awesome video. 

(Prepare some tissues before you watch it, please.)