I thought I can reach that illusion named happiness, but I was wrong.

Standing in front of the mirror, I see myself looking more miserable today.

Should I go out, or stay in home? It’s not like I want go outside, I feel safe inside of this four walls that keep me secluded of the other people that might hurt me, separate from the merciless world, but I can’t stand the frowsty aura of my room.

I sighed and took my snapback, putting it in my head, just because I’m too lazy to fix my hair.

The day isn’t better than yesterday, everything looks gray. The sky, the buildings, the people. In some strange way, these types of days makes me feel better, just a little bit.

I walked aimlessly for about a half an hour. Just looking to the landscape.

I feel how the overwhelming and bitterness of my chest are growing. I don’t know why I’ve been feeling down these last months. Maybe I’m just that typical teenager with those stupid thoughts of depression and low self-esteem, am I not?

I’ve lost the way of my life. But I don’t know if I have lost the way of my life, or I’ve been lost since the beginning.

Even if I’m with company, my heart feels so lonely. Sometimes, I wish I’ve never born. Dead is so terrifying yet tentative. I’m scared.

There’s a chance for me to break down that suicide feelings? I really don’t want to feel like this. It’s like I’m ed up or something. Why I am like this if I have no reason? I mean, maybe I don’t love myself, I don’t have that ‘best friends’ (Barely I have Friends) like everyone does, or that person who make you do stupid things just because you’re in love with he because the one you love is ignoring you, or maybe I don’t have that great relationship with your parents but I can’t say that my life . It’s just that stupid thoughts stuck in my head, making me feel like I’m not worth for the world.

Everyday I’m dying from inside. I don’t feel alive anymore, I’m just a body without soul in this endless world. I see, the final day is coming to me. I’m ready, I don’t have anyone than me. No one is going to noti