The moment they finished ordering and the waiter came back to pick up their menus, Mark began to regret his decision.

It seemed like he was regretting pretty much everything that had to do with said Park Jinyoung recently.

“So, why are you doing this reality show? I mean, your family’s company is doing great right now, is it just for publicity?” Jinyoung asked as they waited for their food to come. When Mark just stared at him, not answering, Jinyoung quickly tried to clarify. “I don’t mean anything by that, I’m honestly just wondering! For me, well, obviously you’ve read my profile.”

“You can say it’s for publicity,” Mark finally said carefully. When Jinyoung looked at him expectantly, waiting for more elaboration, Mark sighed, giving in. There were no cameras around, after all.

“It was my father’s wish, and like you said, it’s good publicity. Our company is well known, but I myself don’t have much of a presence yet. It was a good opportunity, despite all the hassles.”

Jinyoung hummed thoughtfully, taking a sip from his water.

“I thought as much. That makes sense. No offense, but you don’t exactly make your dislike for this whole,” Jinyoung gestured vaguely his hands, “this whole ‘reality’ thing very subtle. It’s pretty unlike the real business world, isn’t it?”

Mark snorted.

“That’s an understatement.”

“So, this was against your will, then? If it was your father’s idea.”

Mark’s eyes narrowed. That question was a bit too close to a line not to be crossed.

“I’m willing to do whatever it takes to prove my worth and further our business.”

Jinyoung caught the warning edge to Mark’s words, eyes immediately crinkling as he let out a short laugh.

“Of course, of course. Okay, enough talk about work. Um, what do you like to do in your free time?”

The change in topic was abrupt, and Mark would have felt relieved if not for the chosen subject. He was caught off guard, and suddenly, Mark felt he was back in high school, called on by the teacher and scrambling for an answer he didn’t know.

“Uh,” Mark floundered for a few seconds. Because truthfully, what free time did he have? He was the successor to Tuan Appliances, and therefore almost always had something work-related preoccupying all of his attention, not to mention all the extra hours he had to pull in order to get to the place where he was now. So whatever time he had left over, he usually spent catching up on sleep, or lazing around his apartment. Mark never was exactly a party-animal to begin with, and who would have the energy to go out after spending twelve hours at work on a regular basis?

But it wasn’t until now, when Mark really thought about it, that he realized that his current situation was really rather pathetic.  

“I don’t have much free time,” Mark finally settled on a response that wasn’t really an answer. “There’s always something to do at the company.”

“Oh come on, there’s gotta be something, even if all you do is go to work and then hole yourself up at home!” Mark cringed inwardly at how close to home Jinyoung’s words were. “Any TV shows? Music preferences?” Jinyoung pressed, leaning forward to rest his chin on his fists.

“Um.” Mark floundered some more, unconsciously leaning backwards and away from Jinyoung. But rather out of disgust or discomfort, it was simply because he was so unused the intense rapture with which Jinyoung was currently gazing at him.

Whether he like it or not, Mark was too often the center of attention, and over time his public speaking skills had been polished to a glossy, perfect professionalism. But this was also the first in a long, long time that anyone had looked so genuinely interested while their attention was focused on him, and for whatever reason this difference was so jarring it made Mark’s mind go blank.

“Uh, I listen to a lot of American stuff, I guess, pop and hip hop and some R&B,” Mark finally managed to rattle off. Besides the awkwardly long pause, thankfully his ability to keep his emotions under tight wraps in the workplace hadn’t abandoned him yet, and all the panicking within was safely concealed.

“Nice! I don’t know much about American music to be honest…though I am a big fan of Chris Brown!”

Before Mark knew what he was doing, he’d already pulled a disgusted face.

“What?” Jinyoung protested. “His stuff’s amazing!”

“Chris Brown is a di– uh,” Mark quickly cut himself off, thankfully catching himself in time before the word was fully uttered. But Jinyoung caught on anyways, laughing.

“A , you mean? The cameras aren’t here, Mark, you can swear you know.”

Mark rolled his eyes, attempting to hide his embarrassment as a result of Jinyoung’s carefreeness.

“I like to be professional at all times, unlike some people.”

“Ohhh ouch, was that aimed at me? I’m so hurt…” Jinyoung clutched his chest, face crumpling in mock pain so convincing he had Mark concerned for a split second, before rationality snapped him out of it.

It was during this slight pause in conversation that the waiter swooped in, depositing their orders on the table swiftly and with a charming smile. Mark resolved to tip him very generously for his impeccable timing, saving him from having to worry about what to talk about next.

For the following few minutes they both dug in, both quite famished from their efforts that day. Although quite talkative, Mark was relieved to find Jinyoung wasn’t one to force conversation where it was unneeded, and they managed to eat in a comfortable silence, only occasional broken by a casual comment about the food.

It was when their pace began to slow, hunger finally satiated that Jinyoung resumed conversation.

“Seems like you put almost all your energy into work then, huh?”

Mark wiped his mouth with the napkin while he nodded.

“Do you…like your work at least?” Jinyoung asked, somewhat more tentatively.

Mark exhaled, setting down his napkin as he appraised Jinyoung, taking in his sincere expression.

Once again, that line was being toed. But the difference was that now, Mark found himself so much more inclined to answer compared to just a few minutes before. It should’ve been alarming, how fast Jinyoung had managed to set Mark at ease in a situation he usually detested. And frankly, he was alarmed, but the panic couldn’t quite set in now, not with the way Jinyoung was looking at him so earnestly as he waited for an answer.

“I…don’t know.” Mark began. This was a question he’d contemplated quite a bit himself, as it was pretty much the extent of his existential crises. “Usually, when people learn about my situation, they give me one of two reactions. The first, is envy. I’m sure I don’t need to elaborate on that for you to understand. As for the second,” Mark paused, sending Jinyoung a wry smile.

“Is pity,” Jinyoung filled in easily, raising an eyebrow to question whether or not he was right. Mark nodded.

“It’s true that my father sets very high expectations, and it’s true I’ve never known anything else, and I didn’t get to choose this. I don’t think I love it yet, but I sure as hell know I don’t hate it. At least, I figure I’d be a lot more miserable and a lot less motivated if I did.”

Jinyoung nodded, sympathetic. “I know what you mean. Well, as long as you’re figuring it out, right?”

Mark hummed in agreement, and a sort of contemplative silence settled over the table.

A few moments later, the ever-perceptive waiter stopped again to ask if they’d like any desert, to which Jinyoung agreed gleefully and conversation resumed in a much more casual direction.

It wasn’t until Mark got home that night, sleepy and lethargic from their meal, that he suddenly jerked involuntarily with an unpleasant realization; while he’d been busy divulging his insecurities, the only thing he’d learned about Park Jinyoung that night was that he liked Chris Brown.

That sneaky .