Small, weak rays of natural, warm light were waking up that Tuesday’s morning of summer; slowly rising behind the distant and vast horizon. Breaking through the quiet darkness of the night with the melodious singing of the birds high above in the leafy, green trees the sun was sleepily stretching out its soft lights all over the clear blue sky. Dull, warm rays illuminates kindly the city; welcoming everyone with the first glorious instants of the new day. Those little sun lights filtered through the small windows of a quiet home; losing a bit of it’s shining strength because of those closed light blue curtains of an specific bedroom. The soft, delicate light of the rising sun illuminates dully the small figure of a boy walking quietly around his room; taking things from here to there in the strictest silence.

His alarm started to ring at 6AM, but after 20 minutes Taeil is still not so sure of what he should bring to this little trip with the Physics Club. He had packed Astronomy books, obviously Physics books too, useful instruments they could need in some moment of the singular phenomenon it will happened around this next 5 days. But giving to the fact they will see and study a beautiful moon eclipse the brunette little boy doesn’t know what exactly bring to the expedition… Astronomy is definitely not his stronger point in Science’s world, though.

The almost unlistenable sound of the door opening breaks his train of thoughts, and when his still dreamy eyes turn over there his cheeks burned slightly because of the person he found. –Monkey boy, why are you awake so early?- it was the only thing Taeil could mumble without sounding too nervous.

But the blonde boy leading against the door just chuckles softly. –Unlike you, I have to go to school today, little nerd.- Jihoon comments low yet amused, smirking a little when his eyes catch the soft pink color on those cute cheeks.

-But we usually wake up at 7AM to go to school, its still so early.- the short boy mumbles somewhat confuse as his eyebrows frown in bewilderment.

And so Jihoon just sighs with that small smirk still painted on his lips. He calmly walks closer to his little step bother, watching the small bag above the bed full of books and things which looks quite tricky to use. -Why are you packing all this? For what could you need an Astronomy book in the trip?- he wonders honestly curios, holding one of the books and taking a glance inside of it.

Taeil on his side just frowns more at those words, wondering why Jihoon avoids his question. So he snatches the book out of the older boy’s hands and puts it back at the bag. –Because we will see a moon eclipse and maybe we could need it.- he answers slightly irritated when his eyes meet with those brown ones.

-A moon eclipse? I’ve never seen one… is it cool?- the tall boy wonders curiously once again, wining a mocking chuckle from the younger boy which he finds pretty y.

-Cool? The word ‘cool’ is as small as a subatomic particle to describe how fascinating a moon eclipse is.- the brunette boy comments still somewhat irritated, yet letting his brilliant mind talk.

And so Jihoon’s  eyebrows rise a little in surprise. –I didn’t know you like moon eclipses so much. I didn’t knew you could like something out of Physics, though.- he mocks slightly, but judging by the way his little boy rolls his eyes he didn’t seem to catch it.

-Astronomy and Physics are related, monkey boy. Don’t you pay a minimal attention in class?- Taeil wonders kinda serious, yet particularly amused. –And I do like moon eclipses, they are not what I want to see to most, but I do like them.- he tells then, his soft voice whispering in a low tone.

Jihoon's brown orbs stare silently for a moment into those sweet ones, thinking in what the short boy had just said with such a warm tone ringing in his words. -Then what is what you want to watch the most?- he wonders in a nice mumble, watching how those lips pursed.

-A Meteor shower. It happens a few times in specifics months and I always forgot to prepare everything to sit outside to watch it.-  Taeil comments clearly frustrated with himself, a cute pout forming in his mouth as his fix his glasses.

And the blonde boy can’t help but smile at that beautiful image. –I believe there are things which, it doesn’t matter how hard you search for, it will happened when it has to happen... like love, for example.- he explains whispering softly, taking one more step closing to the smaller boy.

A slight shiver rolls down Taeil’s back at such idea, as he can feel his cheeks burning a bit stronger than before just because Jihoon is so close. –But… what if love has to happen in a really long period of time? Will you wait for it even if it takes endless years?- he whispers back his question, watching attentively how those orbs shining with such a bright spark.

But his entire small anatomy trembles strongly when arms wrap around his waist, pulling him so close to Jihoon that their faces are just tiny inches apart and their eyes lock together when soft, yet honest words left Jihoon’s mouth in a secret whisper which makes Taeil’s heart beat anxious. –I had... I’m still waiting, actually. And I can keep waiting; I will keep waiting because I know… I know that person will love me; I hope that person will love me.- 

Even when those are the sweetest words Taeil have heard, even when his heart is beating fast against his chest, even when Jihoon’s eyes seems to be saying wonderful things he doesn’t really understands, in the darkness of the bottom of his heart Taeil feels small stabs of pain hurting him. Is it because Jihoon is not talking about him? Is it because he could never be that person Jihoon wants to be loved for?... Is this sensation the ugly feeling of jealousy slowly making his skin cold and bringing tears to the edge of his dull eyes?

His slightly trembling hands close in tight fists of frustration as his head falls a little to hide the tears fighting to come out his eyes when finally words tremble slip from his lips in a weak whisper. –But… i-if you wait for the future… w-won’t you lose the chance to enjoy the present? And then, when you eventually have that love you’ve be waiting for, won’t it hurt to look back at the past and see you left someone important behind?-

“I shouldn’t be this selfish; I don’t even know how love feels like but… I want him to love me instead of that person. If love makes him talk like that, if love makes him be so strong, if love makes his eyes shine so bright then I want to be the cause of that love.” Taeil thinks secretly, hearing the mute silence after his whisper was extinguished.

There’s a soft hand taking his chin and gently raising his head, making him shiver when his dark eyes meet with those brown ones full with something he really can’t decode because, even when Taeil had seen that spark on Jihoon’s eyes before, he still can’t know what it is. –I’m gonna miss you…- it’s what Jihoon whispers in the lowest but clearer tone Taeil had heard before, and it’s what makes his heart jump happily inside his chest.

Soft, sweet lips brush against his in a small kiss after that sincere whisper; and Taeil can’t help but think that he is indeed the most terrible person this vast Universe had ever known when his arms wraps timidly around Jihoon’s neck, pulling them closer and kissing back as slow and sweet as Jihoon; feeling ones again the warm touch of that skin caressing his own and erasing any memory of the cold skim of jealousy. But who can blame him? Who can blame him for wanting to be loved by the person he loves? Because, even if he doesn’t know what conventional love is, this what he feels can be love too, can’t it be? Just like it can rain on a sunny day, all this strong whirlwind of warm emotions shaking his heart because of Jihoon it could be called love… even if it’s not ‘normal’ or ‘common’ or understandable it just could be called his love for Jihoon.    

But out of nowhere the loud and noisy sound of someone knocking on the door ends with Taeil’s thoughts and with the kiss he was sharing with Jihoon, making the two of them alarmed and surprised as they look back at the door startled. –Taeil, baby, are you awake?- the sweet voice of his mother comes through the wood, making them sighs in relive.

-Y-yes mom, I’m awake…- it’s all what the brunette can answer, hearing the strong ‘beating of his heart echoing in his dizzy mind.

-Oh, good. Did you had breakfast, baby?- she wonders yet again.

-Y-yes, mom…- Taeil answers her back as clam as he can manage when he realize he is still on Nichkhun’s arms.

-Double good! I’ll go to get ready to take you to JB’s house. Don’t take too long, baby; we are going in 10 minutes or so, okay?- his mother asks for the last time, and the short boy can hear her walking away after his weak ‘okay’

There’s a light silent filling the small bedroom for a few moments, until Jihoon’s nice chuckle breaks it along with his warm voice. –Let’s get going, little nerd. Let me help you with that.- he simply says, zipping up the small bag on the bed and starting to walk to the door with it.

Maybe it was just a mare impulse of his nervous system, or maybe it was the way it hurts to see Jihoon walking away from him; but in anyway Taeil arms quickly wrap around his step brother body once again, sinking his blush face in the warm back of the tall boy as his trembles lips mumbles shyly what he wanted to say. –I’ll miss you too… I’ll miss you a lot.-

He wasn’t expecting anything more from the older boy, not another line making his heart explode or another kiss taking all his breath… and there weren’t anything like that as well. Jihoon’s warm hand took one of his own and turned around; looking straight into Taeil’s eyes in the most intense gaze the brunette boy have seen before. But when Jihoon’s seductive voice was filling his ears again along with a y wink, Taeil could feel how his face burns in a bright blush. –You better don’t say anything else, or I’m gonna lock you in my room and not let you go.-

And like that, without leaving the younger boy whine about his selfish request, Jihoon just opens the door and kindly drags Taeil through the hallway without bother to look back. But suddenly the small hand which was on his tight grip quickly pulls away. Confuse, he stops and look at the brunette little boy asking the obvious in silent; till his eyes catch the figure of his father standing right in front of them with a rare harsh expression painted all over his face.

-Jihoon, Taeil… can I talk with you for a moment?- he wonders, sounding somewhat mad.

-Dad, Taeil has to go soon.- it’s all what Jihoon can say when the angry aura around his father makes him quite surprise.

-I know, it will be short.- and that’s all what his father answers him back, staring at the both of them with his tick eyebrows frowned strongly.

There were a small silent filling the hallway after that Jihoon had just nodded in response to his father’s answer… but there were something else that tells Jihoon this won’t be good. And after a long, heavy sigh his father’s hard tone of voice spoke again. –I heard the two of you last night.-

Indeed it wasn’t good, at all.

But Jihoon tries to keep it cool. -You heard us last night?- he repeats faking confusion, feeling how a cold shiver shakes his body because of the look his father gave him.

-I can’t believe what you two were doing last night, you are brothers, for God’s sake!- the older man hisses between his clenched teeth, watching down at the two boys with a really irritated glance. They don’t say anything, though. They don’t deny it neither, but there was nothing to deny and they both know it could be useless to tried.

Jihoon’s father sighs once again, as long and as heavy as before, trying to calm himself down and end this talk quickly. –What it’s done, it’s done; but you have to promise me you won’t ever do that again. You are brothers and nothing else.- he states coldly, watching how they just remained in silence –Jihoon, I’m sure you were the one who seduced Taeil and put him into this sick game, so you have to stop this… you have to stop playing with your brother.- 

A rush of burning angriness poisoned Taeil’s mind as soon as Jihoon’s father harsh words hits him. Who he thinks he is to talk about them like if he knew anything about their feelings? So he couldn’t keep quite any longer, and strong, confident words left his mouth in a firm tone of voice. –Hyung, I’m sorry but I can’t promise you that. Jihoon is not my brother: I’ve never seen him as a brother and I will never do it. And hyung, please don’t say he is playing with me; why would Jihoon waste his time playing with me when he can be with any girl he wants? I know what we did… what we do could be wrong, but hyung, please don’t talk about us like if you knew what we feel. You could never understand it, hyung… that’s why you shouldn’t talk about it… or worst, prohibit it.-

A mute, heavy silent wrapped around the hallway after Taeil’s words slowly fade away in the air. Nobody says anything and nobody does anything either. The older man couldn’t believe what his ears were hearing, but the worst part it’s not only that the brunette little boy was right in every single thing he said; but Taeil also sounded so sincere and pure like if it was his own heart the one who was speaking. And like if it wasn’t bad enough, even in the distant Sejoon could see in those dark eyes the strong spark of love himself has on his eyes… and the exact same shine was painted deeply in his son’s orbs since so long ago.

That is the true, it doesn’t matter how it hurts to know… and judging by what Sejoon heard and sees, it seems there’s nothing else to say that could break what the two boys have.

-Taeil, baby, we should get going now!- the distant voice of Taeil’s mother echoes softly in the silent place, surprising at little the three people standing there.

-Ummm… well then… hyung…- Taeil bows deeply to his future step father, feeling pretty nervous after he had blurred out his thoughts in such a fervent way without thinking in the consequences.

He feels an intense stare on him, and he knows it’s not form the older man he has in front. His eyes slowly turn to his side, finding Jihoon’s brown orbs shining again with that something Taeil still can’t know what it is or how to call it. –Jihoon… ummm… g-goobye…- he mumbles shyly as he takes his bag from the boy’s big hand, feeling a nice shiver running in his body when their skin brushes together.

But if the little brunette boy was nervous and shy before those strong arms bugged him tight one more time, pressing him against that warm chest he knows so well; not to mention for those sweet lips connecting perfectly with his own in a slow kiss; now Taeil definitely could die of embarrassment and a mental breakdown.

–It’s not a goodbye, it’s a ‘see you on Monday’.- Jihoon’s low, seductive voice echoes loudly in his ears, making the brunette boy blush redder than any time he can remember as their eyes which lock together seem to be bewitching him.

Dizzy and ashamed Taeil could only nod quickly at what his slow mind could proses, turning around in complete silent and rushing down the stairs as fast as his feet let him; leaving father and son behind… and as soon as Taeil’s small figure was out his view, Jihoon quickly approaches his father, gipping tight his shoulders and looking deeply into those same brown orbs as his with a desperate pleading.

-Dad, you have to believe me, I’m not playing with him. I know it’s wrong because, legally, we’ll brothers but I... I love him. I love him, dad… I love him so much you don’t know how it hurt all this years without him. But now I have a chance, maybe he can love me and that’s all I need… So please dad, please believe me.- Jihoon begs, so desperate and sincere that Sejoon could only listen attentively at his son’s honest words.

It took him a few mute seconds to speak again, even though what he said was just a simple yet meaningful question. -Are you happy, son?-

And just by seeing the bright smile which curved in his son’s lips Sejoon already knew it. –Yes, dad; I’m very happy.- but by the way his voice rings which such a sweet melody, Sejoon couldn’t doubt it neither.

A soft sighs slips through the old man’s lips as his arms find the way around the back of his only son. –If you are happy Jihoon, and if this is what you really want… then I can accept it.- he mumbles almost secretly, feeling how his heart beats calmly yet still worry when his son hug him tightly.

-Thank you, dad.- it’s all what Jihoon whispers before letting his old man go, giving him a smile when their eyes meet once again. –And just for make it clear, I don’t like men, I like just him okay?- he states with confidence, rising his eyebrows to emphasizes his words. 

But his father just laugh softly, panting his right shoulder affectively. –I know, Jihoon. If you were gay I’m sure you could’ve just told me earlier.- Sejoon comments kinda mocking, because it wasn’t the fact that Jihoon and Taeil are boys what sick him, but the fact that they are brothers.

-Oh… okay then…- the blonde boy mumbles somewhat shocked and surprised by his father’s answer, because he was expecting otherwise.

-Come, son. Let’s go to eat breakfast and keep talking about your crush on Taeil.- Sejoon says then with his warm voice, hugging his son by the shoulders tan leading them to the stairs.

When finally they reach out the kitchen, Jihoon stood there watching his father’s back for a moment; suddenly remembering something. –Dad, do you have any way of contacting mom?- he asks like if it was the simplest thing on Earth, sitting down on the table waiting his breakfast.

-Your mom? Why do you want to contact her?- his father asks confuse and curios, still without turning around to watch at his son.

But when Jihoon’s low, soft tone of voice caresses his ears in such a warm and nice touch Sejoon immediately placed his eyes on his son. -Well, I promised it to Taeil… and… I kinda want to talk to her too.-

And it was just when Sejoon saw that bright smile on his son’s face, that smile he have never seen before; when he saw that sparkling flame printed on his son’s eyes which never shine so intense before; when he felt that warm aura radiating from his son’s body the nice sensation of a happy person… it was just then when he understood how strong and pure Jihoon’s love is.