The dawn of my wake

Kyungsoo and Yixing

Kyungsoo wakes up with the light from the red lanterns yesterday still lurking in his peripheral vision, happy dreams split apart by the shrill ringing of the telephone.

"Yixing?" he rolls over in the bed but it's empty, the sheets cold. "Yixing?"

Kyungsoo isn't the type to get worried unnecessarily, but the red numbers 5:00 AM are blinking at him from the digital display next to the bed and Yixing didn't have a night shift at the hospital — he isn't even on call.

It's hard to think, air reverberating with the ringtone that he wishes in retrospect was something nice and soothing. Kyungsoo groans slightly as he props himself up and pulls himself over the cotton sheets to the phone sitting in the charging dock on the nightstand. At seven months pregnant nothing is as easy as it used to be.

"Hello?" He knows he sounds tired and grumpy but it's five in the morning and he'd finally gotten to sleep at midnight because the baby had been too excited. I love you baby but I need my sleep too. He's trying not to be worried either and that makes him extra curt.

"Kyungsoo?" It's Lu Han on the phone. Kyungsoo's heart starts racing and he can feel the baby fluttering. Why is Lu Han calling?

"Lu Han?" Kyungsoo asks, his voice catching in the middle like a started breath. The curtains flap open slightly in the chilly night air. Why is Lu Han calling. Why is Lu Han calling? His fingers are shaking around the phone.

"It's not critical," Lu Han says right away, and Kyungsoo isn't sure if it's better or worse, the fact that Lu Han feels the need to tell him this before anything else.

"What happened?" The words are cascading off of his tongue, he can't shape his head around the thoughts. "Where's Yixing?" Lu Han clears his throat, on the other side of the phone. Kyungsoo can almost see his face, white doctor's coat and green or blue scrubs. The expression he makes when he has to go out to the waiting room and give patients the bad news.

"He got hit by a car —" Kyungsoo can't year anything else that Lu Han is saying over the pounding of his heart. There a sharp kick to his stomach, the baby is asking what's wrong but Kyungsoo can't even think over the rushing of blood in his ears. The room swims.

"KYUNGSOO!" he hears echoing over the phone and the surprise of Lu Han actually shouting is enough to keep him from accidentally dropping it onto the floor. Lu Han's words are urgent, and that more than anything else helps him take an objective step back.

"Kyungsoo, he's okay. He broke two ribs and his left wrist but he's okay," Lu Han says calmly, the words slow and measured. Kyungsoo sits and breathes. The baby stops kicking, only faint flutters revealing its movements. I'm sorry.

"Okay," Kyungsoo says, after taking a deep breath. "I'll be there as soon as possible." He can hear Lu Han taking a breath and he knows what he's going to say but Kyungsoo cuts him off. "I'm going." Lu Han chuckles.

"That's better," he says. "I'll see you then." There's a click as he hangs up; he's probably at the nurses' desk. Kyungsoo dials for a taxi.

The air is cold; he's still in his pajamas but he didn't feel like stumbling around looking for a change of clothes. His ankles have been swollen lately and it makes everything just a little bit harder, but it's not important right now. Lu Han meets him at the entrance, it's not visiting hours right now of course but Kyungsoo wouldn't take no for an answer even if Yixing wasn't a resident doctor here, and a pregnant Kyungsoo is double the threat, once he gets started.

"He's still sleeping," Lu Han explains in the elevator. "It's the remnants of the sedative because we had to operate on his wrist." Kyungsoo frowns sharply at him, and Lu Han shrinks back slightly.

"You didn't say anything about operating over the phone," he accuses Yixing's coworker and his old school upperclassman. In the harsh florescent light of the elevator, Lu Han looks tired. There are bags under his eyes and his lips are chapped. It's been a busy night.

"You sounded like you were having a panic attack over the phone," Lu Han retorts, giving as good as he gets. Kyungsoo blushes slightly.

"If you breathe a word," he threatens. Lu Han nods quickly. Kyungsoo doesn't make idle threats.

Yixing looks too small, somehow, in the hospital bed, dark hair on white sheets and his left arm in a cast. His left leg is bandaged too. Kyungsoo purses his lips but doesn't say anything.

"When do you expect him to wake?" he asks Lu Han instead, and he can see the relief in the doctor's eyes that he's let the matter of the injured leg go. For now.

"Maybe an hour or so," he replies. "That's why I told you to wait —" Kyungsoo cuts him off with a flick of the wrist.

"And if Minseok got hit by a car would you be waiting at home?" he asks instead, watching Lu Han's expression fall. "I thought so."

Kyungsoo pulls over a chair and settles down beside the hospital bed, his fingers folded around Yixing's warm hand. It's still dark outside, but the sky is just starting to brighten. There's a soft swish as the door slides shut behind him but he doesn't look.

It's dawn when Yixing opens his eyes. He groans softly, feeling his arms and legs, the cast on his left arm and the bandages. There's an IV in the crook of his right elbow. What happened? He blinks, once, twice, before last night comes flooding in, the ice, the lights, the — Kyungsoo? He's sitting up in bed before he's had time to think about whether it's a good idea or not; the way his head swims for a moment a good sign that it wasn't but it's not important.

Kyungsoo is sitting by the bed, holding his hand. He's dozing, leaning against a — ? Yixing blinks in surprise, his brain slow to process the morning.

Is that a human-sized plush sheep? Whatever it is, the picture of it beside Kyungsoo, his husband drooped over slightly to rest his head on the sheep's shoulder, makes Yixing's heart flutter. Kyungsoo is so precious when he's sleeping, the soft swell of his stomach like a ripe fruit; tears come to Yixing's eyes when he thinks that he could have lost them forever. I could have broken your heart. A Lunar New Year beginning in tragedy. His fingers tighten reflexively around Kyungsoo's hand and his husband stirs, groaning slightly as he straights and moves his feet. Yixing can tell that Kyungsoo's ankles are swollen and he'd like nothing more than to be able to take his husband home and tuck him back into bed where he belongs.

"I'm so sorry," he whispers. He doesn't think that Kyungsoo has heard him, so he's surprised when his husband looks at him and answers.

"You should be," Kyungsoo frowns. "The phone rang and woke me up and you weren't there." He sounds grumpy, but there's the smallest undercurrent of panic in his voice and Yixing's heart contracts. I'm so so so sorry.

He doesn't say anything, just shifts awkwardly, his arm getting tangled with the IV, but Kyungsoo gets the hint and leans over for a hug. Yixing can't wrap his arms around his husband properly, but he rests his head in the hollow of Kyungsoo's collarbones and neck and feels the smooth firmness of the baby between them.

They stay that way for a moment, until Kyungsoo has to pull back, because the angle is killing his back. It's only when he sees the red on the white sheets that Yixing realizes he pulled his IV out. Kyungsoo spots it a moment after and glares at his husband before pressing the call button.

"I want you home in one piece!" he scolds, but Yixing smiles because Kyungsoo sounds okay. Everything will be okay. "I got this sheep to keep you company but maybe I'll keep it for myself." He sticks out his tongue but Yixing only laughs, as they wait for the nurse to come.

The sun is shining in the window, gold light falling across Kyungsoo's face, his slender wrists crossed over his stomach.

"Happy Lunar New Year," Yixing says. Kyungsoo rolls his eyes, but gives his husband a kiss anyway.

Zola Jesus' Collapse provided the title, section break text and infinite loop while I was writing.
Note: Yixing works at a clinic but is also a resident at the hospital; this is standard practice in some areas. Lu Han actually specializes in the area of obstetrics/gynaecology/andrology but because of the circumstances he is Kyungsoo's contact.