chapter 1: New Girl

06 / 15 / 2015    2:09 am

     She holds me like she will never let go of me—like I am the most important and most precious thing in the entire world; whispering sweet lines of comfort as I shiver and sob into her shoulder. She my hair, her cold cheek pressed against mine. "It's all over, you're save now, I promise." She says with shaking breaths, "we're going to be okay." She sounds so certain of this, but I am not. I wish I could believe her, I wish we were really safe, but I know we'll never be safe again; I've known this, but I can't believe that either. It can't be over yet.

     "We gotta get out," I whimper, clinging to her, tears racing down my cheeks. "We have to get out of here, Soojung."

     I can almost hear the smile on her lips as she speaks; "don't call me that."

09 / 09 / 2014    8:45 am

     I'm going to be fine. A new town, a new school, new people—it's happened before and I'm going to be fine. I'm used to it now. Of course, I would feel better if I was still home; in a world I knew with people I knew. I would be happy then, but it's okay that I'm not. It's all okay.

     "You're going to love it there, Sooyoung darling!" My mother exclaims, looking back at me with a dramatic whoosh of her hair. She looks so happy with her rosy lips parted to show her snow white teeth. Such a happy smile—though I'm not convinced it's real. "It's the best school in Florida!" I nod and smile, but I really couldn't care less. I'll put on a show for the sake of her, I'll pretend I'm happy so I don't bother her, but it's not true.

     "Oh, honey, you passed it!" She says, pointing out the car window at a very large, faded orange building as it flies passed us.

     "Damn," Father mumbles, taking his cigarette from his lips and flicking it out the open window. He does a U turn so suddenly it flings both me and mother up against the windows.

    He speeds back toward the school building. "Good Gosh, be careful, honey!" Mother grabs on to the dashboard for dear life.

    "We're fine, we're fine." He sighs as we pull into the school parking lot.

    "Alright, just pull up in front of the school," she advices, "not so fast now, darling--"

    He looks angrily over at her, "I know what I'm doing, Stephanie!"

    "Of course you do, darling."

    "Yes, so stop telling me out to do." he rambles on, still looking over at her as the car continues to move forward.

    "Honey, honey, yes, but-but dear, there's a kid there... Chiwon, stop the car!"

    He slams on the brakes and we come to a screeching stop inches away from the young boy who had been crossing the parking lot. "Jesus ing Christ!" The boy exclaims, jumping a little away in utter fright, "watch where you're ing going, you old bat!" He continues on his way toward the front doors, leaving both my parents speechless.

    "I'm, uh," I begin hesitantly, "I'm gonna go now." I open the car door, my lunch and book bag in hand.

    "Ah, yes, okay, darling. And make sure you stay away from that fo