"What is a superhero to you?"

Black. Beeping. Noise. Noise. Noise. White lights. White roses. Noise. Clorox. Blankets. Noise. Noise. Stop. Line. Flat. Flat lines. The Flatliners. Music. Drums. Vinyl. Noise. Noise. Skin. Pale. Chemicals. Radiation. Machinery. Noise. Noise. Noise. Noise. Stop. Making it stop. Loading. Breathe. Hyung. Breathe. Noise. Noise. Noise. 

"Mr. Oh, It's your turn to present."

Hair. Pink. Beautiful hair. Scissors. Brains. Bones. Blood. Noise. Smell. Atmosphere. Closing in. Noise. Dreams. Hands. Feet. Shoes. Clothes. Touches. Kisses. Tongues. Beauty. Crying. More crying. Noise. Hate. Fear. Hate of fear. Injections. Slow. Begging. Tears. Noise. Noise. Regret. Noise. Love. Noise. Headache. Noise. Noise. 

"Sehun, are you alright?"

Stop.

"Huh?" The said boy raises his head from his desk, untangling his fingers from his hair and meeting eyes with his professor. Turns out Mr. Kim's eyes weren't the only ones on him, but the whole class' as well. So wide and confused, concerned, like Sehun had been mumbling to himself again (which he probably had).

"Are you feeling sick, Mr. Oh?" Mr. Kim asks again, leaning on his desk.

"No, no." Sehun shakes his head, hair still disheveled and eyes blank. "I'm fine. It's just... not really a morning person."

"Okay. Well, it's your turn to present your paper." The professor slithers off his desk and gestures towards the lectern, granting the space for Sehun.

The boy reluctantly stands with hands already gripping a pile of papers stacked in perfect equality. His hands were shaking, though, and hopefully he was the only one who noticed. More creases formed under his fingers as he walked from his desk to the lectern at the front, eyes scanning the headline of his paper for the nth time. It felt like hours of awkward silence when Sehun finally made it to the front, feet lifting him up the stand.

He clears his throat.

"Last week, Professor Kim Jongin had asked me to write a paper on my personal superhero." Sehun glances at the professor. The mentioned man adjusts his glasses in interest, urging the boy to continue. "Though it's quite an elementary topic to put on a paper, it was a hard thing to do."

"Nobody really played that role in my life. A majority of my life, actually, had been composed of me picking up after myself, me saving myself from burning buildings and men with guns. Maybe it's because I personally don't believe in heroes." Sehun purses his lips and exhales.
"Just one."

"But, unlike most reports I have heard prior to mine, that person is not my mother, or my father, or my brother, or Lebron James, or Michael Jackson. In fact, you probably didn't actually know him, because nobody knew him."


"His name was Luhan."






It's a Thursday that feels like a Monday, leaves falling golden and orange after seasons wash over once again. Right in-front of a stranger's eyes, they'd see familiar rakes sweeping up familiar leaves, a golden, resplendent sun providing us with inevitable warmth and inhabitants of the city rushing past each other with complete disregard. They'd hear the sound of laughter... Children's laughter coming from a nearby playground in the park. They'd smell the perfume of women trotting by and the cologne of the men lagging behind them.

But what nobody sees, or nobody hears, or nobody smells, is the child, Oh Sehun, being pushed to the ground by hands only inches bigger than his. His back hits the soil under their feet, conjuring the most sickening, sadistic laughter from the mouths of other children standing around him. His head feels heavy again, and his eyes tighten and open repeatedly. One second it's the hysterical laughter of bullies, another it's darkness. Sometimes he'd prefer the latter.

"What wrong, you gonna cry, Sebaby?" The one at the front taunts, another wave of chuckles masking over Sehun's painful groans.

"You'll... All... Be... Sorry." Sehun manages to cough out. It does nothing but amuse the older kids.

"What, are you gonna tell on us?" One of them jeers, kicking him on the side of his stomach, air painfully gushing out of Sehun's lungs. Sehun knew better than to hit back, especially when there were five of them and one very skinny, weak, young him. On usual days he would just watch and wait until they went away. On bad days he'd use his mouth, and that got him kicked hard in the stomach, another bruise rising on his skin everytime.

"No..." He muttered. "But you will... Somehow."

"I doubt it." They challenged. Their 'leader' or alpha or something led the pack away with a wave of his hand and a quick 'let's go, guys'. Sehun watches their bodies walk further away before he crawls up in fetal position, buries his head in his knees, and cries like he always did when nobody else could see him.




Sehun sees him every afternoon when school ends, when the kids all go to each other's homes or play soccer on the field. Sehun had never been interested in soccer or video games and juice boxes. The company Sehun enjoyed wasn't very similar to the ones his peers had.

Sehun liked superheroes. Every single day, when his parents weren't home, he would skip homework and pull a box of classic Marvel comic books from under his bed. Every single day, his eyes would lavish over illustrations and words so outrageously entertaining, it would null Sehun's senses and make him forget about the aching bones in his body.

Sehun's parents didn't like comic books, mainly because they portrayed violence and the dangers they never wanted Sehun to know of. But Sehun had already known of violence and evil and danger. It was, in any way, part of his life. Comic books just made it so much better, like he actually had a chance to rise above all the danger and bring justice to all the victimized.

Re-reading them was grand, but getting new ones was splendid and uplifting for a little boy like Oh Sehun. Of course, his parents never bought him anything, nor did Sehun buy himself anything. One of his few acquaintances, Yifan, gave him his first, then told him the rest were his cousin's and that they were free to be his if he wanted it.

"Your cousin's?" Sehun blinked, repeating Yifan's words as he held the Spiderman issue close to his chest.

"Yeah, he has tons." Yifan lays an arm over Sehun's shoulders. "He's giving them away. I don't want them, you can have them."

"Really?"

"Yeah!" Yifan would cheer at the sight of Sehun's large eyes glimmering at the thought of more comic books. "You have to pick them up yourself, though."

"That's fine! Where do I get them? Where's his house?" Sehun leans in excitement and curiousity, feet almost bouncing off the ground. The thought of boxes and boxes of comic book made him spark up like a fire cracker and if he didn't do anything about it quick, he just might explode.

Yifan shrugs at his friend, expression turning into one in deep thought. "He doesn't live in a house. He lives in a building. A white one you see when you make a left at the park."

"That's a hospitals!" Sehun exclaimed in shock. Yifan would then slowly nod.

"Yes, a hospisital! He stays in room three, on the first floor. Mommy would take me there sometimes, but hyung doesn't like me all that much."

Sehun gulps. "He doesn't like you? Then how in the world is he gonna like me?!"

Yifan shrugs again. "I don't know, Hyung doesn't really like anyone, period. Bring him food or something. He loves Chocolate pudding."

And so, after that day of school, Sehun picks up a pack of Chocolate pudding from the canteen with a couple cringe worthy aegyo the ahjumma's seemed to adore, and bikes his way over to the white building near the park. His legs almost give up on him when he stops, and he realizes he had been biking harder and faster than he usually did. Oh, the things he would do for comic books.

His tiny physique manages to sneak him past the ground floor, brunette head popping around everywhere, hands cradling a pack of Chocolate pudding. When he gets to the first floor, he notices the door to room three was left ajar, and with a second's worth of hesitation, he pushes through. He didn't think it was wrong, or that what he was doing could give a terminal patient a heart attack. All he knew was that beyond that door, there was a perfect box of comic books all for him.

"Hello? Mom?" A voice croaks, leading Sehun to more curiousity. The seven year old walks through the door way, careful with the pudding, and takes a deep breath before looking over to the bed.

And there was the first time he had seen him. Sehun froze as quick as he could, almost dropping the pudding he worked so hard to get.

The child in-front of him was noticeably older, but noticeably thinner and paler as well. He had a tube leading to his wrist and a tube leading to both his nostrils. His lips were gaunt and dry, visible even from where Sehun was standing. At the sight of Sehun, his eyes widen, and then ease once he sees the gift at Sehun's hands.

"Hi, I'm Luhan. Yifan called up a while ago, told me to expect you."

Luhan was probably the prettiest human being Sehun had ever laid his eyes on. Despite the skin and the lips and the bones and the tubes, Luhan was beautiful. Sehun had been taught that those adjectives were solely used for a lovely lady, but Sehun could not put Luhan's beauty in other words if not those.
For once in his lifetime, Sehun's head had cleared. It was silent. As a victim of constant pain and everlonging paranoia, Sehun never really got quiet moments.  Luhan was so aesthetically perfect in the eyes of Oh Sehun, who could not utter a single word in Luhan's presence until the older had clapped loudly for his attention.

"Uh... I'm Oh. I- I mean I'm Oh Hunse... I.. Wait no I'm Oh Sehoh... hun! Oh Sehun!" He finally is able to stutter out. Luhan's eyes widen at his peculiar introduction before they curve and he laughs the most beautiful laugh Oh Sehun has heard in forever.

"Uh, yeah, Oh Pudding. I'm calling you that until you can introduce yourself properly." Luhan grins, reaching his hands out. "The pudding, I think, Is for me?"

Sehun quickly nods and stumbles towards him, holding his arms out in caution as if the box were a prized possession. He reaches it up to Luhan, the older's eyes twinkling in response as he receives it and almost drools. "Good. I guess you're looking for a comic book in return."

Sehun nods again, staring up at Luhan beyond the tubes and machines. Luhan grins at him once more, skillfully tearing the pudding's wrapper off with his teeth. Sehun watches him devour it in one strong sip and smile, funny chocolate staining his teeth. It makes Sehun giggle, as well as Luhan.

"Look, okay, since the pudding was good, I'll give you one issue of Captain America."

Sehun's smile falters. "Just one? Yifan said you have tons."

"Oh, I do." Luhan teases him, opening another pudding snack. "But one pudding, one issue. Come back tomorrow, Oh Pudding."

Sehun almost says something in reply before a woman's voice is heard in the halls, and Luhan quickly gestures him to exit through another door connecting to another hospital room. Luckily, there was no one in the other room, and Sehun escapes without anyone noticing.

'Come back tomorrow, Oh Pudding.' 

Those words echo through his head as he bikes away. He doesn't complain at all.




When you're barely making it in elementary school and the only friend you're capable of making is wasting away on a white bed, you better make something damn good out of the time running and the thick smell of Clorox. Oh Sehun had decided on this when Luhan had introduced him to his mother, who eventfully welcomed Sehun to stay for a while when he wanted to.

Sehun believed Luhan was lonely, but Luhan didn't. Apparently, when you're on fragile time and the things keeping you alive are chemicals and tubes and a bunch of peculiar gizmos, you didn't have time to care about loneliness. Luhan had decided on this the summer of his eigth birthday.

"Hyung?" Sehun brings up one day while Luhan is taking a nap, the younger sitting on his cold feet and reading his comics. Luhan raises an eyelid, peeking at him.

"Hm?" He hums.

"What runs through your veins?" Sehun doesn't lift a pupil as he asks Luhan this, casually scanning through each page on the book before turning the page. Luhan's eyes shoot up.

"In my veins?"

"Mhm."

Luhan pauses, finger unconsciously tapping the surface of his mustard colored blanket. "Well, what runs through yours?"

Sehun replies with a monotonous tone, flipping the page again. "Blood. It's boring. You're not boring, so I assume you have something different in you."

"Really, now?"

"Yeah. Well, what runs through yours?" Sehun finally lifts his gaze, but not to look at Luhan. The smile dawning upon Luhan's lips fades when he sees Sehun look at the tubes in his arms, tracing it up to the plastic pouches hung on iron rods like a cold judgement. Oh, the cruel curiousity of the younger.

"...Chemicals." Luhan answeres him bluntly, shifting his eyes away. A part of him regrets ever talking to the boy, ever letting him stay and sit on his feet.

They say comparison is the key to self-destruction. Sehun was a relatively normal kid in terms of physical strength, Luhan figured. The only thing wrong in the little friendship they had going on, was that Luhan was not. Luhan saw Sehun's ability to bike to the hospital, his genuine grins, his rosy cheeks, his tinted skin, his eyes that were full of life. Luhan wasn't like that. Luhan wasn't normal.

Children he saw, however, only made the fact more prominent. Seeing them sit and read, provide their own body with warmth... Luhan hated it. He hated that he couldn't do what they did. He hated that he couldn't be normal.

But to Sehun...

"Then that means you're like a superhero then. I knew it." 

..It wasn't bad. It was good.

When Sehun looked at bullies, he saw evil. When Luhan saw the papers and statistics, he saw bad. When Sehun saw his parents, he saw fear. When Luhan saw the doctor, he saw hate.
 But when Sehun looked at Luhan, he saw good. When Luhan looked at Sehun, he saw good.

It gets them thinking that if they just saw each other, life would be good.





As years pass, Sehun now puts his comic books up on shelves to display. His parents were rarely home for reasons Sehun chose not to linger on.
After nine years of Luhan giving him comic books on the day he'd visit, he now had more than enough. He had piles under his bed and stacks placed on bookshelves, the most rare ones and dear to Luhan's heart being framed to glorify and appreciate.

As years pass, a drug became Luhan's saving grace, and he was allowed to return home. Sehun still visited him after school, sitting next to him by the window and watching seasons wash over each other. Luhan still couldn't go to school or go outside. Everyday, his mother taught him math, but Oh Sehun taught him about life outside. They'd sit by the window, they'd talk. Luhan would sing sometimes while Sehun would smile with his eyes and clap for him. Even when his voice would sometimes fade and transition into coughing fits, Sehun would still pat his back and then tell him he would read for Luhan, because Sehun claims he 'cant sing worth '.

Sehun, as a sixteen year old, had only began to realize Luhan was badly ill. It's not that he was stupid, he knew that Luhan was sick, but he didn't know he was dying. Or maybe he just didn't want to know.

The thought had never crossed his mind and it never bothered him, until he had visited one Friday afternoon, when Luhan had to go back to the hospital for a while, he walked into Luhan sweating, profusely sweating, and crying, fingers pointing to his chest, almost like he wanted to jab through his own flesh. The doctors and the nurses did what they could to help him by talking to one another and sending orders around, but Luhan just kept screaming in silence and pointing to his chest in a pain even Sehun could feel.

He didn't like seeing Luhan in pain. When he visited, Luhan was always happy and smiling, ready to eat the pudding Sehun was trying to fatten him up with, making jokes and discussing Comic plots like he was just some ordinary kid in Sehun's class, like he was Sehun's first and only friend. Earlier, Sehun used to think of reasons why Luhan couldn't go to school and be the friend the outside world could see and have the good fortune of knowing.

That Friday afternoon, he was reminded why. Sehun didn't like being reminded.

When Luhan wakes up after the pain and morphine knocks him out cold, he finds Sehun sitting on the edge of the hospital bed. He's just watching the older move, watching him gain consciousness, watching him wake. The first thing Luhan does is flash Sehun a sleazy smile, one Sehun doesn't return.

"I'm sorry you had to see that." Luhan says weakly albeit with a comforting smile in an attempt to knock the bitter expression away from Sehun's face.

"I'm sorry I came too early, I was sent home." Sehun mutters and turns his body to the side. That's when Luhan sees the cast around Sehun's arm, wrapped tight and long from his upper arm to his wrist. Luhan's face hardens.

He feels the weight in his chest become heavier and if he hadn't known better, he'd say he was having another painful episode.

"Sehun what hap--"

"Luhan, you're not okay, are you?"

"Sehun please, tell me what happened to your--"

"Why didn't you tell me more about what was happening to you, I--"

"Goddamnit, Oh Sehun, Stop cutting me the  off and tell me what happened to your arm!" Sehun cringes when Luhan croaks those words out, struggling to scream but efforts going in vain. Instead, it comes out like pressured air trying to gush out, like the angry tears burning down his cheeks choked him and stole his voice.

"Hyung, please--"

"No, Sehun." Luhan's words become more rigid as he stares Sehun down, the growing urge to just wrap his arms around the older bothering the younger. "Please, Sehun, please. I need to know how this happened."

Sehun hated it when Luhan cried, not that it made him any less beautiful in Sehun's eyes, but it pained him in a way words could not express, seeing Luhan was trying to catch his breath, choking on sobs. Sehun could not even consider lying to him. Not when he was like this.

Sehun notices the desperate plead on Luhan's face as he messily tries to wipe tears away. It pushes the words out like vomit.

"People pushed me down and I tried to stand up for myself but..." Sehun gestures to his bandaged arm. 

There's a pregnant pause before Luhan chokes on more sobs and cries harder than he had before, covering his mouth in an effort to shut himself off. Sehun, unable to watch any longer, runs off the bed and to Luhan's side, using his good arm to lay Luhan's head on his shoulder. Luhan limply obeys, crying endlessly into the younger's shoulder. 

At that moment, Luhan could not hate himself more than he already did. His fears creep back to him, the fear of not being able to see the world with Sehun ever, his fear of not being a capable enough friend, his fear for Sehun, what he would do if Luhan left for good. 

But wouldn't it be all the same? After all, Luhan's just a kid in the hospital. 

Luhan hated that he wasn't the friend that could protect Sehun when he needed his hyung the most, that he was completely useless in a bed and he might as well just die that moment. He hated that Sehun had to be beat for using his mouth, he hated that Sehun's life was so cruel and Luhan couldn't be there to make it any better. He hated that Sehun had to be continuously beat because Luhan couldn't do anything about it. He hated that Sehun had to feel pain.

"Shhh, hyung. Don't cry, please." Sehun softly begged in a whisper against Luhan's hair, fingers slowly through the strands in Luhan's thinning hair. "I'm alright, I'm alright, I promise."

"I worry about you." Luhan admits.

"Don't."

"Sehun, I want you to know that I'm not going to be here forever--"

"Shut up, hyung." Sehun softly mutters. "You're gonna get better."

"Yeah, the chemicals they put in my veins are gonna make me a superhero and I can defend you from all the kids who want to break your arm." Luhan sarcastically says into Sehun's shoulder, making him chuckle a little.

"Hell yeah you are." Sehun tightens the hug.

What's next comes in a small, meaningful whisper that makes Luhan's heart jitter.

"You're a superhero, hyung. Heroes don't die."

Sehun notices all the eyes intently staring at him for the first time, as if they were all actually interested. Sehun had never been good at writing reports, and he doesn't know why they were all actually paying attention until he notices their are small, saline stains on his papers. Tears. Sehun had been crying.

"Uh, sorry." He mumbles, wiping his cheeks dry. "I imagine you all know how this ends now."

There's a tense silence around the room.

"Continue," A random voice from the back of the room says, no malice laced in the tone, just pure curiosity. Sehun gulps and flips the page.

"Alright."



There weren't a lot of happy moments in the fall of that one year, and maybe that's why Sehun remembers them the most. Eighteen years of age and still the same pathetic he was, Oh Sehun didn't really have much to get him going during his senior year. Luhan was all he had. He actually found himself relieved when he was asked to watch Luhan in the afternoons while his mother was at work.

As for Luhan, he didn't have much going on either. Sehun hated to notice, but the doctors had stopped trying that year and Luhan was sent home. Despite the fact that Luhan was literally just waiting for that day to come, that year was when Luhan shone the brightest, and when Luhan shone, so did Sehun.

Sehun was sitting on Luhan's feet and reading a comic when Luhan had said the following; "I want to dye my hair pink."

Sehun chokes on his own spit trying to laugh. "What?"

Luhan grins, sitting up from the bed the hospital had provided him with, part of the promise that they'd keep him comfortable. "I want to dye my hair pink. I want you to buy hair bleach and pink dye from the drugstore and everything necessary, we're doing this today."

Sehun laughs. "Hold your horses, Barbie, you have to be sure about this."

"Shut up, Sehun, I'm sure!" Luhan laughs. Sehun shakes his head but still stands and grabs his bag.

"I just hope you know that if you're doing this, so am I."


After nearly five hours bent over a sink and staining their clothing, the two sit in-front of a mirror and stare at themselves once their hair had dried out and there's a silence as their eyes widen.

"What. The. . Man."

"Holy !" Luhan explodes with a wide, surprised smile on his lips as he grips his almost dead hair with his fingers, thanks to the bleach. He looks at Sehun, who looked like a jar of strawberry pudding, and quickly exploded into laughter.

"Dude!" Luhan hits Sehun on the shoulder from laughing too hard while Sehun slowly touches the strands of his hair.

"I... What have I... What have I done."

"I don't know man, but you ed up bad!" Luhan almost topples over in a hysterical fit. Sehun slowly takes his eyes off his painful reflection and eyes Luhan.

"Oh my God..." Sehun's eyes widens. Luhan stops.

"What?"

"You look like a fairy!" Sehun bursts, holding his stomach to keep himself from suffocating in laughter. Luhan's eyebrows crease as his cheeks get warm.

"I do not!"

"Quick, Luhan, Grant my three wishes!"

"That's a genie, you idiot."

"You look so pretty, Luhan!"

"Shut up."

Needless to say, Sehun get's a lot of for what he did with his hair, but seeing Luhan smile like that, he doesn't regret it at all.



There were a lot of things Oh Sehun could not admit while experiencing the majority of his youth, most of them concerning Luhan. For example, the fact that Sehun always sits on Luhan's feet because he could tell they were cold, always fidgeting and twiddling underneath the thin blanket. Sehun would never say that he did it because he noticed, one reason because Luhan hated it when Sehun noticed.

What hurt Sehun the most that day was when he realized Luhan did everything he could do so Sehun wouldn't notice. He swallowed pain down, he bit fear back, all so Sehun could see him like a normal person, like Sehun had wanted him to be, like Luhan had wanted to be. In their lengthy time together, they knew very well that each other was all they've known. Seeing each other happy was all they've known, because happy was all they've known when they were together. Without the other, lives were bleak, but they would never want to admit that to each other.

Sehun will forever remember that it was 5 o' clock on a Wednesday afternoon in the fall when leaves blended in yellow and oranges and people smiled, when children laughed and people walked by each other in disregard, when Luhan and Sehun shared the comfort of the dim room, when Luhan knew that he could not do anymore for Sehun not to notice.

Luhan's mother, a registered nurse, had found a way to let the doctors agree to give Luhan a lethal injection. Sehun later learns that it was because Luhan had begged his mother to do it when his pain heightened, when he knew he was dying, but he didn't want to wait. The injection would kill him in his sleep. It would nod him off, and then stop his heart. That was the process Luhan's mother had stammered to Sehun before bursting into a fit of tears and explaining that she didn't want to see her son when he died, that she had said all that needed to be said, and then giving the syringe to Sehun.

Sehun had the syringe in his hand, the syringe that would take Luhan away from him forever, and Luhan knew it.

"You bastard." Sehun first says when he opens the door to Luhan's room, finding him laying on the bed as if he were made of porcelain. Luhan slowly turns his head as if he weren't strong enough for it (which he probably wasn't) and gives Sehun a tiny smile.

Sehun, however, was letting the tears fall in rivulets down his cheeks as he grit his teeth. Maybe it was rage, sadness, or all of the above that made Sehun's breathing so burdened and heavy, but he was being suffocated and he didn't like it.

"Why are you giving up so easily?" He let those words seethe through his teeth like venom, deciding he didn't care if he sounded beyond selfish. Over the years, Luhan's battle has been on and off, like a light switch that could so spontaneously light a town or bleaken it. Sehun held on to the hope that, maybe, the lights would reignite right then.

Luhan continued to try his best to smile at him, to fool him into thinking it was alright, to stop him from noticing, but it was slowly wavering. Sehun's eyes stung and his jaw hurt, a migraine growing from the heat behind his eyes. Luhan his lips before he talked.

"Sehun, I don't want to die tomorrow gasping for air and experiencing the peak of my utmost pain." Luhan explains, which causes Sehun's breathing to slow down. "Sehun, I know it's coming, so please, help me leave in peace."

"Luhan... Hyung..." Sehun neared him, grabbing hold of his shoulder that felt like nothing but bone, and cried onto the bed sheets on Luhan's stomach.

"I don't think you understand how much I need you."

And that was it. That was the line Luhan was sure hurt more than the grasp of death. That was the very thing Luhan thought he was smart enough to prevent. Something far more severe than sentiment, a reality much more fowl than any sad piece of literature.

It was his pathetic attempt to smile that lift Sehun's head up, and the words that got Sehun to slow down.

"You don't, Sehun. You are the strongest person I have ever known, the strongest person I have ever had the good fortune to have heard. I have experienced years and years of pain and trial, but it's you, Sehun, who is the stronger. You're the hero, and you have saved me in every way one can be saved."

"Hyung, I don't want to see a world without you in it."

"I'll never leave, Sehun." Luhan holds back the veil of tears on the verge of spilling. "Heroes don't die, remember?"

Sehun wipes his tears. "Heroes don't die."

It's with reluctance and shaky fingers that Sehun injects Luhan, the older taking deep breaths as the syringe slowly emptied. Sehun drops it to the side once it runs dry and immediately grabs hold of Luhan's hand.

"Luhan." He whispered over and over like a silent prayer as he waited for his best friend to close his eyes. Luhan says nothing, but stares at Sehun as he waits for his eyelids to grow heavier.

He realizes it was taking longer than usual, and he realizes he can no longer hide in-front of Sehun, who's lips had been twitching in the crave to cry again.

"Se...hun." He stammers. "I... I thought I'd be ready for this. I thought I'd... Be... Ready to leave you."

Sehun cracks. "Hyung, please, don't fight it I don't want to see you in pain--"

"You asked me... what ran through my veins... correct?" Sehun nods quickly, tightening his grip around Luhan's cold hands.

"It's... You, Sehun. You have kept me alive more... than chemicals and... machines and blood... Ever could. The doctors said I'm... lucky to have made it this... far and I only have.. you to thank."

High pitched yelps escape Sehun's shaking lips in an attempt not to burst into tears as Luhan grazed his thumb over his fingers.

"I want you to... Be the last thing I see before I... lose everything. Promise me you'll... stay with me until then." Luhan's speech becomes slow whispers.

"I will be, Hyung. I will be right next to you." Sehun assures him in a shaking tone. He purses his lips in hopes the tears would dry in his eyelids, but it doesn't, and he would do anything to let them be gone instead of Luhan, the hyung who was with him though the world could never see. Sehun feels the tugs and pulls on his heart, how fast it was beating and how scared he was.

Luhan gives him a soft smile as his eyes slowly lower, Sehun following his pupils all the way down until they were no longer visible. Sehun bites his lip so hard he could taste blood as the movement of Luhan's thumb slows down.

"Sehun I..." He says softly, so softly, Sehun struggled to hear him over the sound of his own yelps.

"Sehun, I love..."

And his thumb grew idle.

Luhan was gone.





"Nobody knew Luhan except for his family, and I. The world never got to know the beautiful boy who was crazy enough to dye his hair pink, or give all his comic books to some kid he never met. Despite this, Luhan was the most courageous hero I have ever come across. Yes, he may not have saved a town or a planet or a galaxy, but he saved me in a way my parents, my brother, Lebron James or Michael Jackson never could.

If you had seen me back then, you'd say I was just some kid who was pushed around, someone who's world spun around comic books. You know, I used to think the only thing that kept me going throughout my life was the comic books Luhan gave me but no. It was Luhan. I will never regret the day I had talked back to bullies, the day Yifan told me reading something would help, the day I used aegyo to get pudding from the lunch lady, the day I snuck in the hospital to get an issue, the day I had to escape in secret, because that was the day I met Luhan, the only hero I will ever need."

From the back of the room, a slow clapping emerges, that turns into applause around the room. Sehun smiles though there were tears in his eyes, and he steps down the lectern like he had just swept away all the burden that had been growing since Luhan had left.

What the people in the room would never know, though, was just how broken Sehun was after that, what Sehun had to do to put himself back together, how he would always remember Luhan kissing him while under medical drugs in the hospital, how Sehun kissed him back, how Sehun would always remember the taste of his lips and his every touch, how Sehun never attended the funeral, how Luhan's mother had to tear Sehun away from Luhan's lifeless body that day in his room, just how many times Sehun had whispered 'I love you so much' in the ears that could no longer hear, how much Sehun meant it.

But those things, along with their nonsense conversations that meant a lot, the memories Sehun would never erase, and everything Luhan was, belonged in Oh Sehun's veins, for they could keep him alive as much as blood could.

After all, Heroes never die.

Therefore Luhan never will.