Sungyeol is a perfectly normal high schooler with average grades, average looks and an average life. He repeats that like a chant to whoever he meets. Of course, it’s only his wishful thinking. If he were obligated to tell the complete truth about himself, it would be something like, ‘Hi, my name is Lee Sungyeol and I’m a high schooler who can see ghosts. I have average grades but a handsome face to compensate it. So in other words, my life is absolutely not normal.’

He remembers it clearly when it had all started.

It was at the start of elementary school when he was drawing his family portrait. He received a failing grade as he hadn’t drawn anything. His mind was distracted at that time by a man who sat beside him, staring lovingly at the girl sitting across him.  He quickly questioned the man but said nothing. It disturbed him at the thought of it being some kind of ert so he ran to the teacher yelling about his dilemma. The teacher was silent as she gave him a worried look. “Sungyeol dear, there isn’t any man here.” Even though Sungyeol continued to insist, he was eventually sent home by the teacher, worried that he may be hallucinating. His ‘hallucinations’ didn’t stop there, and instead, he started seeing more things other people couldn’t see. He cried to himself at the fact that no one believed him. As time went by, he began suspecting that he may be able to see ghosts. He was absolutely fascinated at the thought and decided to confine his secret with his best friend, Jang Dongwoo. He was betrayed immediately the next day as he was harassed with eyes that followed him in disgust. Dongwoo cut ties with him as he became the school’s cause of laughter. His family didn’t disown him or do anything but treated him the same. He did feel that a certain distance was created. 

In middle school, it seemed as the story about him had spread and exaggerated, creating absurd rumors. Sungyeol once heard someone say he could summon spirits or something along those lines. He exploded in laughter later when he had gotten home. He had to admit he was slightly thankful as these rumors caused people to avoid him in fright. He had passed his middle school days in peace although it was lonely.

Wanting to avoid repetition of his past, after many rejections he had finally gained permission to move in to a small apartment near his high school. He of course entered a school far away from his past neighborhood. It was considered a failure when he became an outcast. Well that would be an exaggeration; he was actually just the guy that everyone knows about but doesn’t hang out with. It wasn’t because of his power, because no one knew about it. He was just an awkward person to begin with. It didn’t actually bother him but he became even more unfriendly. With no one to rely on, he turned to studies.

Sungyeol leaned his head on his hand as he stared out the window. A new student will be transferred to his class and so they were in wait for their currently late teacher. Despite knowing he wasn’t going to be friends with the new student, he couldn’t help but expect something exciting to happen. Shaking his head at his stupid expectation that he knew wouldn’t happen, he was going to start studying when he heard the door to the classroom slide open. Instinctively, his head snapped towards it. Seeing how it was just the teacher he was about to return to his studies when behind the teacher, he saw a boy happily skip in to the room. The boy had black hair, beautiful snow like skin and perfect facial features. Sungyeol raised a brow at the fact that the student was wearing a suit.

“Hello, I’m Kim Myungsoo and I’m a wanderer!” The boy cheerfully announced.

Sungyeol stared at the other in slight confusion and slight amusement. He slightly smiled in satisfaction when he heard the teacher announce that the new student would sit next to him. Preparing his facial expressions for an aloof look, he turned to his right ready to greet the boy when he froze. Sitting there was a brunette with tiny but cute eyes. In other words, it wasn’t the other handsome student. Confused, his eyes roamed around the room in search for the boy. His body shook in surprise as a face suddenly appeared before his. His eyes opened wide, he recognized the face as Myungsoo and noticed the other’s expression was one of astonishment. Before he could say something, the boy grinned at him before yelling out, “You can see me!?”

The words echoed in Sungyeol’s mind as he processed it. “Don’t tell me… you’re not a ghost, are you?”

Myungsoo’s grin widened at the discovery of someone who could finally see him. “I prefer being called a lost soul.”

Instead of retorting, Sungyeol turned his head to look at the board. With the intention of completely ignoring the other’s existence, he endured the boy’s whining with much difficulty. The bell signalizing lunch time, Sungyeol ran out of the room in attempt to escape the obnoxious ghost.

Sungyeol lay down on the roof top in silence, feeling the warmth of the sun embrace him. The roof top was his favorite place to stay as no one came to bother him (not that anyone actually did bother him) because it was a restricted area. Although everyone knows he had stolen the key, no one bothered to retrieve it back from him. Eyes closing from the pleasant weather, he would have fallen asleep. Would have. That is if it wasn’t for someone sitting on top of him, blocking the sunlight and casting a shadow to fall across his face. Sungyeol thought. If it was who he thought it was, there was no way a shadow would appear neither would there be any weight. Eyes shooting open, it took in the sight of a boy sitting on top of him- a grin still gracing upon his face.

“What are you?” He asked, pushing the other off with a glare.

“I am a lost soul who is in search for a partner who can help me find me hope-“

“Cut the crap. There is no way a ghost can have a shadow.” He said blantly ignoring the pout that came after his interruption.

“If I tell you my circumstances, will you help me?”

Sungyeol still wanted his normal life but he knew deep down he could never be normal. He was intrigued with Myungsoo but he was afraid of the consequences it might bring on his currently almost normal life.  “Why should I? It brings nothing but trouble to me.”  

“Isn’t the way you’re living boring?” Sungyeol stared straight into Myungsoo’s eyes in response “I personally think you’re lucky to be able to see things others can’t.”

Sungyeol changed his position so he lay on his side, muttering “If you don’t know anything, don’t spout crap like that.”

“It’s the truth. Although you might think of it as a curse, it might actually be a blessing.” Myungsoo said staring at the passing gray clouds that were starting to group, glancing at the figure that lay beside him at times.

“Like I said, just stop it.” He muttered a bit angrily this time.

Sungyeol didn’t get what Myungsoo meant by saying his power was a blessing. He grit his teeth at the thought of the other saying that just to get him to help. Noting the silence the guy was giving him, he sat up getting ready to go back to the classroom thinking the ghost had finished.

“I’ve lost all my memories,” Myungsoo started, grabbing his attention. “That new student there, Kim Sunggyu is my only clue. I have no idea what role he had in my life. I only know that memories flicker when I’m with him. So I thought maybe he was someone important to me, but the whole time I was watching him, he had never thought about me.”

“Isn’t that obvious?” He said, snorting. “He probably has already moved on from you or you never existed for him. Anyways, I wasn’t particularly curious about your past life. I was curious about your body.”

“Oh… I guess you could be right. Well moving on to what you want to know, before I came to this world a voice said that I could  solidify my body whenever I want as it would help me in my investigation cause I helped him once. He warned me to not let myself get recognized. I don’t know what he’s talking about though. ”

Sungyeol forehead creased at the other’s words. He didn’t understand how that was possible. Ghosts can’t solidify for obvious reasons unless, they possess someone. What was absurd to him was the fact that Myungsoo was the same appearance wise, in both forms. If he had possessed someone, when he would supposedly ‘solidify’, he would have a different appearance.

“So now that I told you my situation, you’ll help me right?” He heard the other say excitedly, “Since it’s decided, we’ll meet up in front of the park near here after your school ends, alright? Alright, I’ll be waiting, bye!”

Before Sungyeol could protest, the ghost jumped over the railing, falling down the three story building. Forgetting the fact the other was a ghost, he ran over to the railing checking to see if the other was alright. Although he saw that the other landed just fine, his eyes continued to follow him until his back disappeared into the crowd of people.

Sungyeol wasn’t going to go to the park and that was final. He didn’t have to feel guilty because Myungsoo was the one who didn’t listen to him and decided everything by himself. After school had ended, he quickly went home, avoiding the area near the park as much as possible. Arriving home, he changed clothes and flopped on the couch all while ignoring the fact he was feeling guilty. Turning on the TV, it was on a program that was talking about the recent pause in the serial killings. ‘I wonder if serial killers also can  become ghosts. I mean do they even regret? Not that I would ever want to meet one.’ Sungyeol thought as he lowered the volume of the TV. After a few minutes, the remote control slipped out of his hand, making a small thud.

Sungyeol groaned at the sound of rain hitting against his window. Stretching his limbs, he looked for the time. The clock telling him it was eight o’clock was all it took for his stomach to remember he hadn’t eaten anything the whole day. Scratching his head, he entered his kitchen with an objective to find food. Opening the refrigerator, he blankly stared at the emptiness wondering where the food went. He didn’t want to go out to buy something because of the rain and because of the chance he had of meeting Myungsoo. ‘Speaking of Myungsoo, I wonder if he’s still there. ‘ Sungyeol shook his head at the thought and doubted the other would continue to wait for a stranger in this weather.

Sungyeol smiled proudly at the quantity of instant ramen he had bought. Ignoring the looks from the people around, he began walking back home. He cursed when he noticed he had ended up near the park. ‘It’s not like he’s still here or anything, so I guess it’s okay to pass by.” Relieved at the thought, he was about to walk pass the park when he heard some girls who were from his school whispering among themselves.

“Wasn’t that guy from before kind of cool?” He heard one of the girls say as another agreed

“Isn’t that kind of creepy though? I mean he was just sitting there getting wet while wearing a suit. I mean what if he’s actually the serial killer who’s on the news these days?” A girl with her hair tied up in a bun whispered before yelling out, “AHHHHH!”

The girls then shrieked out in horror making the girl laugh at her friend’s reactions. Sungyeol thought well at the short description the girl gave and rubbed his temples, in an irritated manner. Walking towards the girls, he successfully got the location of the guy they were talking about.

Following the directions he was given, he stopped in front of an empty bench. ‘I guess he gave up on waiting.’ Sungyeol paused when he realized the slight disappointment that he recognized in his voice. While convincing himself that there was no way he was disappointed over the other’s departure, he noted a slight movement behind the tree near him. Taking small and quiet steps to the tree, his eyes widened at the sight of Myungsoo laying down completely drenched from the rain. The ghost’s body shot up as soon as he felt Sungyeol’s presence. “You came!” Myungsoo shot him a smile that showed how grateful he was.

Sungyeol stayed speechless at the sight. Anger suddenly overcame him at the other’s stupid actions. “Why were you still waiting for me? You knew school ended a long time ago yet why?”

“Because you came in the end.” Myungsoo simply responded annoying the other even more.

“What if I didn’t come?”

“But you did. I was actually quite anxious you know.”

“Why’d you even solidify? You might catch a cold like that.” Sungyeol said in a scolding tone as he handed Myungsoo the bags and his umbrella.

“Because, I noticed that in dramas this way of convincing someone always work-“Myungsoo was silenced by the glare that was thrown at him, “Actually… the feeling of the rain passing through my body was unpleasant.” He responded bashfully as he returned the bags and umbrella to the other when he was told to. As he bowed down in effort to take off the grass that stuck on his pants, Myungsoo’s eyes widened in suprise at the sudden weight that was thrown on top of his head. He looked up at Sungyeol for an explanation but the other was already starting to walk away. Curious, he took off the weight from his head to look at it. A smile immediately appeared on his face as a result.

“Aren’t you going to follow me?” Sungyeol asked, not bothering to look back.

“You didn’t have to give me your jacket you know. All I have to do is return to my original form.” Myungsoo said smirking. Hearing a small ‘shut up’ coming from Sungyeol, he decided to stop making fun of the other.

“So where are we going?” Myungsoo asked, trailing behind Sungyeol.

“You don’t have a place to stay, do you? I live alone so you can stay there a few days. We’ll talk more about your situation there.”

‘It won’t be that bad.’ Sungyeol thought as he led the other to his apartment building.

Stepping inside of his house, Sungyeol told Myungsoo to stay seated in the living room- to Myungsoo’s dismay. As he began cooking, thoughts began to fill his head. ‘ me. my mind that told me it was okay to bring him here. I can’t kick him out either, I mean, I’d be an .’

“Sungyeol?” Hearing a certain male’s voice calling his name, Sungyeol faced him.

“What?”

“So does this mean you’re going to help me?” Myungsoo asked, his words soaked in expectation.

“Sur-“ Sungyeol stopped midway when he realized the words that were about to naturally come out of his mouth, ’What was I about to do? Getting myself into this kind of mess will only complicate things for my life.’ He thought before continuing, “No.”

“What’s the normal life that you keep speaking of?” Myungsoo asked, wanting to help Sungyeol although he had no clue how.

“How did you-“ He said unconsciously yelling. ‘And what the heck is up with his questions? A normal life is obviously a normal life. I mean getting a job, getting married and having children.’

“I can read minds.” Was the other’s simple response before returning to the topic. “But why do you want to live such a life?”

“Because I… because,” Sungyeol opened his mouth ready to shoot all of the reasons that were at the tip of his tongue but nothing came out. He tried again but with no avail. His mind went blank as the reasons escaped his mind one by one, leaving the reason he always wished of. “Because… I want to be happy. I want to be loved. I want to be able to love myself.”

“Aren’t you bringing your sadness upon you, yourself? It’s because you hide and detest your power that people bring it upon you as a weakness. Humans are bound to look down on insecurities. If even you look down upon yourself how do you expect people to not exploit on your weaknesses?”

Anger overcame Sungyeol at the way Myungsoo spoke about it. “Do you think I don’t know? Everyone says the same damn thing. Don’t you think I tried loving myself for the way I was? Yes, I tried but every single time, I would stumble upon even more holes in myself.”

“Isn’t this an opportunity though? An opportunity to change the way you think. How about you try one more time? The holes you speak about, I’ll prove to you that there are people who will overlook those holes and cherish you the way you are.”

Sungyeol thought that Myungsoo was being stupid. He thought his words were stupid. He thought this all was plain stupid. “Do you think all my feelings could be solved with your words? If only these feelings could be solved so simply.”

“I didn’t say that to make your hate go away. It’s as you said, my words alone will do nothing to make you better. It’s your own effort. You said you wanted to be able to love yourself. My words were meant to be your first step.”

Sungyeol chuckled, “My first step? To what? Instead of wasting your time taking pity on me, I suggest you start working hard on your own problem. If it is even considered a problem. I really envy you.”

Myungsoo weakly glared at the other. “Envious of me? You’re envious of waking up remembering nothing? Of passing each day with no one to talk to while people pass right through you? Of not knowing why you didn’t and can’t just pass on?”

“You don’t have to do anything! You don’t have to be loved. You have an excuse,” Sungyeol continued with a whisper, “you’re dead.” He looked away from Myungsoo at his last words.

“Exactly. I’m dead. You’re alive. You can desire, regret or envy people, things or moments. I can’t… I can’t have any of those feelings because I’m dead. I can’t do anything to soothe these feelings. I’m dead.” Myungsoo said as his glare intensified, “I don’t know what happened to you in the past but admit it. You’re never going to be able to have a normal life. The you who constantly lives hating your power, will never find someone who’ll love you for who you are because you don’t give people a chance.”

“I did! I told my so called best friend and he told it just like that to others. He left my side. Even my parents, the people who brought me to this world distanced themselves away from me. Throughout my middle school year, not even one person approached me because they judged who I was by the rumors! Give people a chance? They never gave me a chance!”

Myungsoo became silent at Sungyeol’s outburst. Huffing, Sungyeol returned to the forgotten food that was left uncooked. Thinking that the ghost had nothing more to say he was about to send him away when the other’s voice stopped him, “I’m sorry. I was just happy that someone was finally able to see me. I wanted to help you but I guess I was just being annoying. I-I’ll just get going now; you don’t need to help me. But, before I go, I just want to tell you that I’m sure that there were some that wanted to befriend you and that I… I am glad that I met you today. I guess this is a good bye?”

Myungsoo gave an awkward salute before passing straight through the door. Sungyeol stared blankly at the water that was starting boil. He thought about what Myungsoo had said to him and frowned. He was never going to have a normal life. He knew that. He knew he wasn’t going to be able to hide his power his whole life and that he wouldn’t be able to hide it forever from who he was going to marry. Honestly, he knew that it wasn’t his power that made him unable to like other people. It was his self. He never bothered to communicate with others and his high school year had proved it. Change. He wanted to change his perspective of life.

Sungyeol stood up, running towards the door  hoping Myungsoo hadn’t gone far. Opening the door, he was surprised to be met with a crouched Myungsoo, wagging an imaginary tail the moment he saw him. Squinting his eyes he said, “You had this all planned didn’t you, you sly bastard.”

“I have no clue to what you are talking about..” The male said pulling on an innocent look that wasn’t going to deceive him. “Well, let’s start talking about how we are going to solve my problem.” Slipping through Sungyeol, Myungsoo skipped in to the house like he owned it.

“You aren’t going to ask why I changed my mind?” Sungyeol questioned, closing the door behind him.

“Just so you know, what I said wasn’t a lie and like I said, I can read minds.”

“Anyways, returning to your topic, what are we going to do?” Sungyeol asked, taking a seat on the sofa.

“I don’t know.” Myungsoo responded, concentrating on what was playing on the television.

Sungyeol slapped Myungsoo. Hard.

“You mean you dragged me in this without knowing how to start?!”

“Not really. Sunggyu’s a good starting point.” He said nonchalantly, not understanding the reason of why Sungyeol was so flabbergasted.

“No it’s not. Oh wait, you said memories flicker with him right? Do you remember anything?”

“I actually don’t really remember what passed through my head. It’s kind of like waking up from a dream; you don’t remember even half of it.” Myungsoo explained

“Let’s try meeting Sunggyu tomorrow at school. Even if it’s just a small thing, let’s try looking for it. We might find a lead. I’m heading to bed right now, I’m so exhausted I don’t even have the will to eat.”

“Okay! I’m gonna finish watching this and I’ll get in with you.” The ghost chuckled at the man who dramatically ripped off the name tag of an actor.

“Who said you’re sleeping with me?”

Myungsoo’s eyes widened as he heard a door close and the sound of a lock clicking.

A/N: Yes, I at writing emotional(?) things ; - ;