What is Beauty?

The Aesthetic Of Beauty

“Sir, don't forget Mr. Choi will be coming today.”

 

Youngbae looked up from his research and furrowed his eyebrows, “And this Mr. Choi is?”

 

“He is your model for your research sir, we picked only the most handsome of men, as you had requested.”

 

“Ah yes.” Youngbae sighed, “I hope he is up to standard, I haven't all day for games.”

 

“Yes sir, we have definitely made sure that he is one of a kind.”

 

Youngbae highly doubted that, but he needed a model and he would have to do with whoever they brought him. He had not been satisfied with a single one, how could he study such mundane looking people? “I hope so, or else you're fired.”

 

“Yes sir, I understand sir. Mr. Choi will be here soon, do you want me to send him up as soon as he gets here?”

 

“Yes, now I have some paperwork to go over, please do not disturb me until then.”

 

“Yes sir.”

 

Youngbae went back to his work without another glance at the young servant and thumbed the drawings he had sketched of hundreds of people. He was obsessed with the perceived thought of beauty and wanted to study it, if not for science, then for art. He was a calculative man, but he loved the fluidity of art. Youngbae wanted to combine the two things he loved and study beauty and the mind, but his tastes were refined and he was picky. He had been looking for a model for a couple of months now, and he couldn't choose one. They all were the same, and when he went out himself to find someone, no one seemed to fit his standards.

 

What everyone else picked out for him didn't work, to him, they were all the same person, and every time he turned up his nose at a new model he would get a perplexed look as if he made a choice that could not be understood. Youngbae wanted a type of beauty that he was afraid did not exist, in this world he lived in, he was stuck with the average.

 

He heard a knock on his door a little while later, but he did not dare to look up, as he was afraid he would get another disappointment, “Come in.”

 

Youngbae could hear loud and assured footsteps coming toward him, and he realized that whoever this man may be, his walk embodied his confidence. He straightened his papers and only dared to look up when he heard the scrape of a chair against wood and the grunt of someone sitting down.

 

“You must be Mr. Choi.” Youngbae accessed his features and concluded that yes, this man was undoubtedly handsome, but he was like the others.

 

“Choi Seunghyun.”

 

“I see.” Youngbae handed Seunghyun a stack of papers, all of them drawings of beautiful people, “Take a look through those drawings, then tell me what you see.”

 

Seunghyun looked at them one by one, his facial expression staying the same, unreadable, as he looked through them, “They're all faces.”

 

“Well done, you're a genius, no, tell me what is in common with the all of these faces.”

 

“They're all good looking?”

 

“Yes, and what can you say about their features?”

 

“Some hollowed cheeks, most have sharp features, such as the jaw and eyes, all have a certain look, you know with their eyes or something.”

 

Youngbae nodded his head, “Good observation, I would put you in that pile.”

 

Seunghyun gave him a calculated look, “I am unsure if that is a good thing or a bad thing.”

 

“It is neither good nor bad, you're handsome, you should go in that pile.”' Youngbae took the drawings back from Seunghyun, he was ready to turn him down, but time was ticking, and he was sure he didn't have anymore time to deny another person.

 

“Okay, so where does that leave us?” Seunghyun wanted to know if he had gotten the job or not, he had come down here assured that he would get it, but he was doubting that now.

 

“It leaves us-” the squeaking of the door opening interrupted Youngbae and he agitatedly looked over at the person disturbing him, but he could not get a good look at whoever it was because their head was down as they stared at the floor.

 

“I am sorry to interrupt, but I have news for the young master.”

 

Seunghyun turned and beckoned for the person to come to him, “I'm sorry, he usually doesn't do this.”

 

“Who is he?”

 

“One of my servants, my most trusted actually.” he focused on the servant and narrowed his eyes, “Yes, what is it you want, I am in a meeting.”

 

He mumbled incoherently toward the floor, a little embarrassed to speak in front of the two, “You're father, sir.”

 

“Please look at me when you're speaking Daesung, I can barely hear you.”

 

Daesung looked up and he cleared his throat, “Your father, sir.”

 

“Yes, and?”

 

He pressed his lips together and gave Seunghyun a look.

 

“Mm, well send word that I will be busy, I can not see him.”

 

“Yes sir.”

 

Youngbae was enthralled by the man standing in front of him, he was exactly what he was looking for. The mans fringe hung low in his face, covering an eye in the process, and his face looked chiseled from granite stone. He had to have him, if not to study, but to just look at, Daesung was what he wanted. His beauty was unmatched, not a single person he had seen looked like Daesung, and that was a good thing, because the common was not what he was looking for.

 

“You two are not from here.” Youngbae spoke impulsively, knowing that if Daesung lived around him, he would have seen.

 

“No, we're not, we just came from up north.” Seunghyun was about to tell Daesung to leave, but Youngbae held up his hand, halting him.

 

“Let him stay, I'd like to propose something.”

 

“And that would be?”

 

“As you know I am paying handsomely for this position, so I expect my models to be perfect and exactly what I want. I only need two, I'd like to have you.”

 

“Excellent.”

 

“But only if I could study your servant as well.”

 

“Him?” Seunghyun gave Youngbae an incredulous look, “You can't possibly want him.”

 

“I do, to compare and contrast.”

 

“Ah, to study the handsome and the ordinary.”

 

That was exactly Youngbae's point, accept that Daesung was nothing ordinary, “Exactly, so what do you say?”

 

“I'm in, you can use him in your study, but as long as it does not get in the way with his duties as a servant to me.”

 

“I understand, I will make sure it doesn't.”

 

“Then we have a deal then?”

 

“We do.” Youngbae shook Seunghyun's hand, “Now that this arrangement is settled I will show you to your room, I trust you shall be staying in my estate since it'll be easier to reach you this way.”

 

“Yes of course, will Daesung have a place as well, or shall he be staying with me?”

 

“I will accommodate another room for him of course, unless you want him to be in the same room as you.”

 

“No, that is fine, I was just inquiring.”

 

Youngbae stood up from his desk, “Shall we then?” he watched as Seunghyun nodded his head and stood up as well, following him as Youngbae walked through the corridors to him to his room. Seunghyun's room was on the second floor in the back, Youngbae had already had that room set up for a guest and he would have to make another room up for Daesung, but he did not mind that at all, Daesung would be the star of his studies, “Here is your room Mr. Choi, I hope it is up to your standards.”

 

“It's perfect.”

 

“I'll have someone bring up your things soon, just as soon as I show Daesung to his room.”

 

“Oh I hope not too far away.”

 

“No, of course not, please make yourself at home in the meanwhile.”

 

Youngbae nodded toward Daesung and had him follow, “I did not know I would have another person showing up, or else I would have had a room readily made for you.”

 

Daesung kept his gaze lowered, so as not to look Youngbae in the eye, “I'm sorry.”

 

“It is not your fault, I should have known.” the way Daesung acted was strange to Youngbae, he had never met someone so cautious, and shy before, “So how long have you been with that Choi fellow?”

 

“I have been serving him for seven years now.” Daesung's voice was so quiet that Youngbae could barely hear him, but even still, Youngbae was afraid to ask him to speak up or else he was afraid he would break.

 

“You must have been young.”

 

“Yes.” That seemed to have ended the conversation, Daesung just followed Youngbae without another word. Youngbae stopped in front of a door that wasn't too far from Seunghyun's and opened it. He smiled when Daesung walked in, eyes full of wonder and a perplexed look on his face, “This is not the servants quarters?”

 

“No, to me you are a guest, not a servant, so you shall be treated that way.” Youngbae watched as Daesung felt the covers of the bed and walked around the room, touching and picking random items up, “I trust it is up to your standards?”

 

“More than that.”

 

“Very well then, I'll leave you to your devices.”

 

“Wait.”

 

Youngbae raised an eyebrow and waited for Daesung to speak.

 

“This study, why do you … why am I a part of it?” there was a suspicious look that ran over Daesung's features, “If it is to make fun, I've had enough of that.”

 

If Youngbae did not know better, he would have never known that the slight raise of Daesung's voice was the equivalent of him getting upset. Though that did not concern Youngbae at the moment, what concerned him was that Daesung could think that he would be making fun of him in this study, it was an uncouth accusation, “That is not what this is about, this is about beauty, I only study the beautiful. You and Seunghyun are perfect for what I want to write about.”

 

Daesung seemed taken aback and he looked away, slightly disbelieving of what Youngbae said, “Do not flatter me, I am no fool for that.”

 

“Why is it you think I am trying to fool you?” Youngbae closed the door behind him and stepped fully into the room, “I am speaking the truth.”

 

Daesung huffed and he twiddled with his thumbs as Youngbae advanced toward him, “What is it that a man knows about beauty anyways?”

 

“I do not know about other men, but I know quite a lot, and when I see it, I call it out.”

 

“Is master Choi not handsome enough for you?”

 

“He is handsome yes, but he is not what I was looking for. This Seunghyun fellow is mainly the part of this study that I could have pulled out of any of the people from the list of people I already interviewed. You on the other hand are something special, something I had yet to find till you came along. You may not understand, but this is extremely important to me, as I am a man with too much money and too much time on my hands.”

 

Daesung's curiosity seemed to have taken over his voice, “Is this out of boredom?”

 

“Boredom? Maybe, but it's more out of my fascination with the human mind and how we as a people collectively perceive beauty. I have always been told that I have exceptional taste, I never knew what that meant, but it had to do with something along the lines that I did not like what others did, and that confused me. I wanted to know what is it that everyone else saw that I did not for a long time, but now I think it is that everyone else simply does not see what I do, and I want to bring to light my way of thinking, and why I was never wrong about the people I had grown to love for their beauty.”

 

Daesung fiddled with the sleeve of his shirt and looked away from Youngbae, “You may not make fun of me, but everyone else will. Master Choi will see to it.”

 

“Why is that?”

 

“He never ceases to tell me that I am in the presence of unnatural beauty and wealth, even you seem to embody the looks of someone who is unnaturally beautiful. I know I am not, and I am okay with it, but I do not like it brought to my attention over and over again.”

 

“I thank you for the compliment, but by the end of this experiment you will think the same of yourself. Just you wait.” with that, Youngbae turned, and made his way out of the room, but before he left all the way he had one more thing to say, “You and Seunghyun will be joining me for lunch in an hour, after that, I would like to get to work after.” he left without another word and left to tell his servants to send up their stuff.

 

Daesung sighed when Youngbae left and walked up to the mirror by the bureau. He looked into it and tried to find what Youngbae saw in him, there was not an ounce of beauty he could see, and he wondered if Youngbae was blind. Daesung frowned, his mother would not like him thinking this way, but then again she would not have liked the way he was living now, to be a servant of another man, she had worked hard so he wouldn't have to do that. He had striven to be something his mother could have been proud of, but he had always been a quiet boy, and rarely spoke up for himself. His conversation with Youngbae had stunned him, as he spoke he almost wanted to will himself to stop speaking, because he did not want to sound ungrateful when placed with a golden opportunity.

 

Though he had always known that he wasn't the cream of the crop, he was never what someone was looking for. For his age he should have found someone by now, but because of his awkward behavior and his less than stunning looks, he had no female companion. He was bound to the young master, and he was afraid he would end up serving him for the rest of his life. It was not a job he thought fondly of, and he didn't exactly enjoy the company of Seunghyun. There were also things he didn't enjoy doing, but as he was a servant, he had to do them.

 

Youngbae could insist that he was one of a kind amongst beautiful people, but he did not feel that way, and he was sure that he would never feel that way.

 

Daesung sat on the bed and waited patiently for his stuff to arrive. It wasn't like he had much to bring in the first place though. When his stuff arrived he placed his clothes in drawers and waited to be called for lunch. The room was different from what he was used to, he had been sleeping on hard beds and under dingy sheets for quite a while now, and everything seemed to be too expensive for his mind to wrap around it. Of course he was around expensive things all the time, deeming as Seunghyun only like things of high quality, but he never had a chance to call those things his own.

 

He frowned, he knew he shouldn't get too comfortable because at the end of the day he would always be a servant.

 

There was a light knock on his door, and he went up to answer it. There was a woman on the other side of the door, smiling his way, though a sincere smile it was not. She cleared and told him that lunch was served and that he should join everyone downstairs where they were congregated. Daesung smiled graciously, though he could have sworn that the woman was not very fond of him for some reason. He followed her quietly down the hallway and stairs to the dining room.

 

Immediately from force of habit he took a stance by Seunghyun once he saw him instead of sitting down in a seat.

 

Youngbae raised an eyebrow from where he was seated and cleared his throat, “Daesung, I'm sure you would be more comfortable in a chair.”

 

He gave a glance at Seunghyun before sitting down, “Sir?”

 

Seunghyun sighed heavily, “You know what to do.”

 

Daesung nodded his head and began unfolding Seunghyun's napkin then placed it on his knee. He poured some water in Seunghyun's glass then began fixing his plate before sitting down himself.

 

Youngbae didn't know what to say about that little display, but he did say that he wouldn't let any of his research get in the way of Daesung's servant duties, so for now, he would not say a word. “After lunch I would like to talk to you both separately and take a drawing of both of your profiles.”

 

“What will be talking about?” Seunghyun set his glass down and glanced at Youngbae with a it of intrigue.

 

“Just your idea on the topic I'm researching, I want to know what it is that you both think of beauty. What you both find as beautiful.”

 

An odd look came over Seunghyun's features, “What I think is beautiful? Interesting.”

 

“It is what I find interesting, I know my questions may seem a bit odd, but I need to know.” Youngbae glance over at Daesung, “What do you think?”

 

Daesung only shrugged, he didn't think anything, or, he wasn't used to being asked his opinion. It was a long time since anyone had cared to ask h what he thought on a subject, “I really don't know.”

 

Seunghyun scoffed as a smirk formed on his lips, “Good luck getting anything good out of him. It's rare that you can get a few words out of him, let alone something to think about.”

 

“Hmm, we'll see about that.” Youngbae was sure there was a lot going on in the mind of Daesung and that he was only repressing his desire to speak out, but as he did not earlier, he wasn't going to push it.

 

There was a strong silence that set over the table as they ate and Youngbae was attune to picking it up. The absolute oblivious nature that Seunghyun had appalled Youngbae. It was almost laughable that Seunghyun either didn't notice that Daesung was extremely uncomfortable or highly insulted that he was basically just called dimwitted.

 

When they were done Youngbae stood up and gestured for the two to follow him and let his staff put away the dishes. He led them into a room with a few couches and a drawing board, “I'll be interviewing you both here for a few days, but for now I'd like to speak with Seunghyun first and then Daesung.” he looked at Daesung and placed his hand on his shoulder, “Could you please wait out in the hallway until it's your turn.”

 

“Uh yeah.” he quickly made his way out of the room and left Youngbae and Seunghyun to their devices.

 

“Please sit here.” Youngbae gestured for Seunghyun to sit on the couch that was right by his drawing board, “I'd like you to tell me what you think beauty is as I take notes on what you say”

 

Seunghyun leaned froward and tried to think about what Youngbae said, “I'm not so sure, I suppose beauty is what appeasing to the eye. People say flowers can beautiful, they say when the sky is clear and blue that it's beautiful, or when they look at someone they can see beauty, but what really is beauty? Isn't it the closest thing that we can find to perfect? Some people find beauty in the imperfections of life, but is that really valid?

 

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, though as a society we all have a set version of what beauty is. It's red roses and blue skies, the high cheekbones and clear eyes. Individually what we see as beauty is all really the same when you come to think of it. There is no differentiating between it all, we are trained to like a certain thing and that is how it will always be. Of course there are variations, but there is always a majority that likes those things.

 

“When you ask me what beauty is, it's nothing, it just is. When people look at me they call me handsome, beautiful, it's because it just is. There is no reason why, I just am. Yeah, you can blame it on genetics, but after that what really is the reason? Why is that we don't find a certain type of person beautiful? Like you showed me, the people that you already had interviewed had the same look to them, they were all individuals, but there is just that one thing that draws a person to them. It is innate that we find them beautiful. Beauty is already programmed into our way of thinking, and beauty isn't anything, it just is.”

 

Youngbae figured Seunghyun was done speaking and jotted down the rest of Seunghyun's thoughts. He wasn't going to say anything on Seunghyun said and just set his notebook down and looked at his drawing board, “Now can you please sit still so I can draw you?”

 

Seunghyun did as he was told and waited for Youngbae to get down drawing his profile. Youngbae had given Seunghyun a lot to think about, but he wasn't going to dwell on it for too long as the topic was a little too daunting for him. He tried not to fidget as Youngbae drew him and blew out a relieved breath when Youngbae finally announced that he was done.

 

“So, how did I do?”

 

Youngbae raised an eyebrow, “Fine I guess, we will discuss it later in the project.”

 

“Okay then.”

 

“Can you please ask Daesung to come in before you leave?”

 

“Yes, I will.”

 

Youngbae flipped to another page of his notebook and waited for Daesung to take his seat in front of him. When Daesung sat down he gave him a gentle smile, “Now, can you tell me what you think beauty is?”

 

“Beauty? Uhm.” Daesung chewed on his lip in thought, he wasn't really good with the whole subject of beauty; it wasn't his forté, “Beauty, beauty, well, I don't know. Isn't beauty just what people like to look at? I mean, master Choi is beautiful, a lot of people like t look at him...” Daesung scowled and tapped his chin, “I'm not sure.”

 

Youngbae gave him a reassuring pat on his knee, “What do you think beauty is? All I want to know is your opinion and how you feel it is perceived, I don't care about anyone elses thoughts right now.”

 

“What do I think of beauty huh. I think all around, beauty is materialistic, and redundant. I mean, there are simple things that you can find beautiful in the world that really matter, but people only like to focus on the look of things instead of trying to figure what's really inside. You could see someone and the could be the ugliest person in the world, but inside they could be the most beautiful. When I think of beauty, excuse me, I don't mean to be cliché, but when I think of beauty, I think of kindness. Kindness is what really makes a person beautiful. Not someone's face or the gleam of a new car, those things are just objects, there is nothing beautiful about them.

 

“All around me I see the ugliness of the world, unfortunately I grew up in it. Master Choi is the ugliest person I know, but because of his face, that is overlooked. It is the materialism of beauty that I despise, and it truly is not needed. Maybe it is because I am not outwardly beautiful that I am biased, but it is just the way I feel. Beauty is truly beyond looks, beauty is a mother feeding her child, a stranger helping another stranger out, it is the everyday things we do to stay alive, but no one seems to think that.

 

“I just don”t want to be looked at for my looks, I want to be looked at for who I truly am.”

 

Youngbae put down his pencil and gave Daesung an intrigued look, “And who are you?”

 

“Me? I'm no one but Kang Daesung, a simple servant.”

 

“No, really, who are you?”

 

Daesung rubbed the back of his neck and sighed, “I'm a guy that just wants to be seen, someone who wants the comfort of another and a life that isn't this. I'm quiet, I am sad, and I just peace. I'm really no one but a poor hapless soul trying to find my way out.”

 

“Interesting.” Youngbae cleared his throat, “Now, can you please sit still while I draw you?”

 

“Yes sir.”

 

Youngbae only hesitated a little at Daesung's formality, and began drawing him. Daesung's look was a bit different from Seunghyun's, Seunghyun had a certain look when Youngbae was drawing him. Like he was supposed to be in this position, but Daesung looked completely different, a little unsure of himself and slightly … unhappy. Unhappy to do this, or genuinely unhappy with his life, Youngbae couldn't tell at the moment.

 

He finished drawing and before he told Daesung that eh could leave he took his hand and looked him in the eye, “You are beautiful, on the outside, and as well as the inside.”

 

Daesung just pursed his lips, “Like I said, what do men really know about beauty?”

 

Youngbae smirked, “Maybe not much, but maybe more than what you think.”

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ILuvToDae #1
Chapter 2: I love this. I love the topic & how it's being explored. To me, beauty is so much more than what the eye sees. Or what we've been trained to find attractive. Beauty touches your heart. It makes you feel something. It is so much more than what you see on the surface. I hope to read more!
SunDaeDreamz
#2
Chapter 2: Oh, I am absolutely in love with this. I hope that you will update it again.
choimira_
#3
Chapter 1: Your perpective of beauty is deeper than what i could think of. Your idea for this story is awfully amazing and your writing style makes me feel very at ease reading it. Hope your long hiatus wouldnt be so long though hehhe
GL18MTBD
#4
Chapter 2: Your writting is so smooth and polite, i really love it
it makes me kind of relaxing... Can't wait so update soon, will you ? #seriouslook
Shikoba_hendrix #5
Hi, I've just subscribed after browding through the features (congrats btw!) and this has definitely hooked my attention, the concept seems so interesting and refreshing so I'm definitely looking forward to it, its my first BigBang fic (which is weird to admit considering they are the kings and I absolutely should have read one by now) and I'm excited for it! I hope you don't mind if I leave a comment or two after reading a bit more.
Big love,
S.H XxX
choimira_
#6
Chapter 1: the story is beautiful even its not finished. maybe even more beautiful if its finished?
MyLactobacillus
#7
Update soon please
michiru10 #8
Chapter 1: This story started off really great! The flow of it is very appealing and this story had showed the differences of each of the characters personality. I hope you could still continue this story! Thank you for writing it. ♥
musactr56 #9
Chapter 1: loving it can't wait to see where this goes love some SunDae :D
B2theANG
#10
We reached the dream goal and you helped realize it! XD
Thank you again, so much, for being a part of the festival *^^* ♥
VIP ❤ Big Bang