I’m in a plane right now going back to korea. After I heard the news about jiyong I decide to return to Korea immediately... I know he needs me now. I tried to call him but he just send me a text message saying he was okay and he’s in the studio doing his songs. I know he’s lying. He’s like that. Every time an issue like this occurs he always build a wall between us and to others who cares for him. He doesn’t want us especially me to get worried. He only shows his weaknesses to sajangnim. I’m his girlfriend and it hurts me that I can’t do anything to help him. But now, I won’t let that happen. We will face it together. I will be by on his side no matter what... jiyong-ah wait for me…

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Incheon airport…

     “Dara-shii… let’s go… the car is over there...” jiyong’s manager came to picked me up.

     I followed them till we get inside the car…

     “Dara-shii…why are you here?...You’re supposed to be in Japan right now?” jiyong manager asked me

     “I knew already….. About the issue involving him…….” I looked at him “you can’t keep it from me…you know how the media spreads rumor, manager. even if it’s here in Korea it can reached Japan... So you should know why I’m here... You don’t have to pretend that you don’t know...”

     “mian-he dara... he told me not to tell you. He said he don’t want to be burden to you…” manager said

     “It’s okay... I know he asked you to do that….. Where is he? Is he okay?” I asked him

     “He’s in the bigbang dorm right now and I don’t know if he’s okay. He doesn’t want to talk to us. Only sajangnim can talk to him... He asked us to give him time for a moment..” he said

     “I know you’re worried, manager. He’s like your son. Don’t worry, everything will be okay... He’ll be okay…” I assured him…

     After 30 mins we arrived at bigbangs dorm….

Jiyong and seungri’s dorm

     As I enter their room I could smell alcohol. Maybe he’s drinking again. He always do that every time he’s in trouble. I know he’s in his room

    I hold the door knob to open the door but before open the door I have to ready myself first. I have to look strong before I face him.

     When I know that I’m ready, I slowly pushed the door to open. There, I saw him sitting on the floor beside the bed. I saw some cans of beers beside him. I walked slowly towards him. I saw his eyes closed. I kneel down in front of him and touch his face.

     I saw him opening his eyes. I smile “did I wake you up baby?” I asked him in a soft voice

     “No...” he said like whispering...

     He looked tired. It hurts me seeing him like this again. It breaks my heart. And I know he didn’t want me to see him like this.

Jiyong POV

     Being a celebrity is really hard. Sometimes I’m thinking to give up my career and start a new life as Kwon Jiyong not Gdragon but even if I ran away I’m still the Gdragon of Korea.

     When I heard the news yesterday, it crushed me. Here I am again, suffering. Feeling the pain that I felt before. Why do I need to suffer like this? ... I’ve worked hard in everything that I do. Why can’t they just appreciate it? Why can’t they just leave me alone? I’m also a human like them. I also have feelings.

     Now, I’m being a burden again to sajangnim, to bigbang, to the managers, and most of all to my baby girl. I don’t want them to pity me. So I have to stay away from them for a moment. I know they are all worried about me. But I can’t face them right now.

     And to my baby girl, I know by now she knew already. She tried to call me but I didn’t answer, afraid that the tears from my eyes will fall down the moment I hear her soft voice. I just send a text message to her saying that I’m okay and working on the studio. I lied to her because I don’t want her to get worried because of his damn news. I disappoint her again…

     I’m so lonely that I wished she’s her by my side comforting me. But I can’t, I don’t want to see her worried face.

     I heard someone opening the door of my room. Maybe it’s seungri or my manager. What the hell are they doing here, I told them to leave me alone… I pretended to be sleeping. I closed my eyes when I heard his footsteps coming. I can feel that he’s now in front me. But why is it I’m feeling like I wanted to cry. Suddenly I felt a hand touching my face that makes me open my eyes.

     When I open my eyes, I feel like I saw an angel in front me. The girl that I wanted to be on my side is now looking at me. I saw her smile, making the pain inside me vanished.

     “Did I wake you up, baby?” she asked in her angelic voice. I really miss her voice

     “no…” I said..

     At this moment I can no longer control my tears

DARA’S POV 

     I wiped away the tears that falling from his eyes then hug him. I can feel the pain that he’s keeping inside him. I wanted to cry but I promised myself not to cry in front of him, not to show my weak side instead I have to show him how strong I am right now that he can depend on.

     I pulled myself away from him and looked at him..

     “Are you done with your drama?” I told him. I saw his confused face

     “Dara…”

     “You don’t have to explain, ji” I cut him off

     “I told you before that I will believed in you, no matter what people say about you, I don’t care.. You know why?” I asked him

      He’s just looking at me.  I have to be strong for him

     “Because you asked me for believing you no matter what… people may turn their back on you but not me….”

     “You’re just making it worst by staying here and drinking these beers. Why don’t you go outside and fix this mess. Speak for yourself Jiyong” I told him

     I saw him smirked… “Speak for myself? Even if I speak for myself they wouldn’t even listen. They judged me easily…they’ve already judged me… nobody will listen Dara. They hate me….” he said

     “Nobody will listen to you? For god’s sake jiyong.!...  Have you seen what’s on the internet right now?... your fans jiyong!! They keep on supporting you.. They don’t care about the issue, they only care about you.. I’m not telling you speak for those haters, but for your fans… they are waiting for you to speak up. They want to know your side because they believed in you!!... and they hate you?... jiyong haters will always be haters… you can’t pleased everyone… we believe you jiyong…we all do…”I told him

    “dara….”he said

     I cupped his face and wipe the tears that started to fall from his eyes…

     “jiyong-ah… I want you to know that I love you very much… that I’ll always be here for you no matter what….you’ve seen how weak I am but you haven’t seen how strong I am…. You can always depend on me jiyong ...I’m your girlfriend. You can share everything to me. I know you’re not telling me your problem because you don’t want me to get worried, but you know what? The more you hide your true feelings from me the more I get worried.. And it hurts me jiyong because I can’t help you…” I said..

     I can feel the tears forming from my eyes. But I have to control myself not to cry…

     “Baby..You’re always on my side before until now if I have problems… it’s you that always comfort me.. And I’m very thankful for that….now it’s my turn to comfort you.. Your problem is my problem Jiyong… we can fight together… I will never leave you… your friends and fans would never leave you.. I would stand by you forever, Jiyong…” I told him that made him cry even more.

     “I know you’re strong, but you can’t always be strong…you don’t have to pretend that you’re okay… You have to depend to someone if you know that you can’t take it anymore” I told him

     He hold my hands and kissed them…. “Baby... thank you….please don’t leave me… I need you” he said, pleading

     After hearing the word “I need you” my tears started to fall down….. I hugged him tightly

     “I won’t leave you…. Jiyong-ah...You don’t know how much you made me happy saying that you need me… that’s all I wanted to hear from you…” I whispered

     “ now it’s my turn to tell you this….” I break the hug and cupped his face again…

     “baby it’s ok…everything will be alright….” I told him and kissed him on the lips….