It was another day in that asylum as a man went out after finishing some discussions about the latest funeral. With another sigh he moved his feet away from the office. The cold winter wind greeted as he pulled the glass door. He stared around just to see a hospital ahead. The white painted building where he spent most of his life, the place where everything started.

No one wanted to take this kind of job but he choose to live with it. Pale faces, white gowns or suits. He took both of it. Both the mental one and the full-stop one. Some people wandered around him that night. They were wearing the same white clothes, same painted expressions; same hurt that flashed from their eyes.

He was here from the first time.

***

Was there any feeling that knocked you up the first time when you feel the world? We were born as a baby, the most innocent creature in the world. We grew up, we learned much. Did you remember about those toys you played in your childhood? Or something new that you tried before?

"Miss, everything is ready."

"Fine then."

Nothing could compare all these hectic things happened in a single life of Ahri. She was a normal high school girl until everything broke right after she graduated. Ahri didn't want to look back but sometimes she kept doing that only to learn. She often told all the stories to everyone she knew. It wasn't that embarrassing again for her to share because she simply didn't want other people to feel and experience the same.

She stepped inside a small room painted with blank white color. Soon she saw some cameras, a chair with a table in front of it. The atmosphere was quiet thick. But she didn't care anymore when she saw someone, a human, sat across her respectable chair.

His skin was pale, as pale as the snow. The big owl eyes attached on his face with the plump pink lips pouted. He crooked his eyebrows, expressing a feeling of angriness mixed with confusedness. She stared at the bruises formed on that white pearl skin and almost frowned in sadness.

Hair took a seat and examined the file provided there. She widened her eyes upon the files.

He was the same as her, so much.

"Well, I assume that you are Do Kyung So?" Hair asked as the boy nodded.

"Why I'm here? I'm not crazy," The boy asked as Hair silently wanted to laugh because the real description of an insane person popped on her mind.

They wouldn't admit it anyway.

"Do you happen to know this person?" Hair skipped his question as she showed a photo attached in the files.

"Jongin! I want to see him! Where is he?" Suddenly the boy stood up and rapidly stared at his surroundings.

She shocked by the looks the boy sent to the photo. A pure form of love flashed through those white-rich eyes as Ahri turned to read more before continuing. The boy sat again while sobbing and calling this Jongin boy.

Step brother, how pathetic.

Ahri examined the attitude again and found the key. That wasn't a family love. It was more than that. She turned to see a bold date attached beside this Jongin's profile.

"Oh," Ahri didn't know what to say anymore.

Delusional, a long way to go.

"I want Jongin," The boy said as Ahri checked on his age again.

Two years younger than her and one year older than Jongin.

Kyung Soo kept calling Jongin and Jongin all the time until he cried out loud like a mad person. Ahri swayed away when he started to throw things like pens or his chair. This wouldn't be a good chance to continue so she signaled to stop the session. The camera turned off and she went outside just to see a tall man approached with a bottle of mineral water.

"Are you okay?" A familiar voice heard as she took the bottle and shoved the water fast to .

"It was more thrilling that I assumed before. But I'm okay, Yifan," Ahri replied after she drank.

"Glad to know that you're okay. What case if I may know?"

"A boy with the same history as mine," Ahri said and Yifan took her hand to intertwine it with his.

"You can help him. I'm sure of it," Yean smiled and Hair couldn't be calmer to have this man by her side.

***

Wake up you useless human.

A boy jolted up from his sleep. He slightly sat on the bed and turned to another bed next to his. His heart beat faster than before.

Why are you here? You are not that worthy.

"Stop!" He screamed and another body almost fell on the floor.

"Hyung! Are you okay?"

"Stop! Jongin! Help me!"

"Shh shh," With a swift move, the taller boy hugged Kyung Soo to calm him down and patted his back.

Kyung Soo didn't like it when his other mind confronted him. He hated it much. After those nightmares and whispers, he went to the bathroom to wash his face. Jongin quietly accompanied his brother to calm himself down.

It was happening every night after Kyung Soo discovered that his parents divorced. Later on, he went home with bruises everywhere, courtesy to some fights with some meddling kids who tried to harm him. He became cold with everyone who ditched him. But to his closest friends, he was just an innocent boy with big heart. He had his own defenses by acting cold to others and that was a start to some new discoveries.

Go on and try, you are not a nerd, right?

That was the night when he arrived at home with Jongin who helped him to walk because of all the liquors he got from the bar. He couldn't fight Jongin to let go of him so he slumped onto the couch as Jongin went straight to the kitchen. The smell of warm milk lingered on the air as Kyung Soo faintly saw Jongin gave him a mug of warm milk. He drank all of it and fell asleep.

After those encounter, Kyung Soo always saw Jongin differently. Yes they were step brother because Kyung Soo's mom took Jongin from the orphanage since he was ten years old. They were playing together happily in the past and becoming the usual child people saw. And after their mother passed away, Kyung Soo leaned to Jongin everytime.

Jongin was calm and delicate while Kyung Soo was a quiet troublemaker in school. Even he was disliked by every teacher or students, Jongin always stood beside him. Kyung Soo was a smart student anyway so everyone didn't dare to confront him every time.

Kyung Soo loved Jongin, more than just a brotherly one.

You can't have him. He is straight as a ruler. Look now he has a girlfriend!

"Stop," Kyung Soo clenched his fist and growled to his thoughts.

Do they look good together?

Oh look they are holding hands!

"Damn. Stop it!" He began to run away and quickly entered the school's locker room.

You are not worthy to have him.

Who are you anyway?

Kyung Soo couldn't help it anymore and punched the mirror hard. Blood was dripping from his fist but he felt good afterwards. The feeling was rather new but he wanted to feel it again. His hand rapidly moved to his locker. He smiled upon his founding.

A razor.

***

"Hyung. What's with those bandages?" Jongin asked one evening as Kyung Soo flinched a bit.

"I was arranging something and it hovered me suddenly," Kyung Soo managed a simple lie and Jongin nodded, too dumbfounded to understand.

Jongin watched as Kyung Soo went to his room and packed his clothes. His eyes widened but he didn't understand why his hyung wanted to go away.

"Hyung where are you going?" Jongin suddenly felt afraid.

"I want to move out. Can I? You are big enough to take care of yourself right?" Kyung Soo tried to keep his voice steady but he was broke inside.

"But hyung..."

"I'm going. Bye Jongin," Kyung Soo hugged Jongin for a while and walked away after that.

***

Ahri examined the boy in front of her. The second session would begin soon. She actually didn't know how to deal with that complexity hidden in Kyung Soo. Maybe she could use another way.

"Do you want to meet Jongin?" Ahri asked even she knew that it was cruel to lie.

"Jongin? Of course!" Kyung Soo beamed as Ahri taken aback by that aura of loving someone.

"Then you have to cooperate," Ahri almost cried because she didn't know if she could do it again.

"Fine. What do you want to know?"

"Tell me who your victims are," Ahri went straight to the question.

"Easy. Just five. Choi Jinri, Jung Soo Jung, Kim So Eun, Kim Taeyeon, Kim Seohyun. Not many. Now let me meet Jongin!"

"Let's go then," Ahri knew what to do as the camera crew behind waved their hands, signaling that she shouldn't do that.

"It's okay!" Ahri shouted as she stood up and Kyung Soo trailed behind her.

Ahri stepped outside and Yifan quickly followed her and Kyung Soo. The man swayed next to Kyung Soo and greeted him. Luckily Kyung Soo kept smiling because he was happy. Soon they ended in a car with Yifan as the driver.

Kyung Soo's eyes widened as soon as they reached a place where everything ended sweetly to everyone. The twilight breeze greeted as they went out from the car. Yifan quickly wrapped Kyung Soo to a hug, realizing that this little fragile boy could run everywhere after remembering the fate he must faced.

Ahri simply walked to a section of the yard. Kyung Soo scanned all the names there as Yifan glanced at Ahri in worries. He didn't want Ahri to get hurt by unstable Kyung Soo.

"Jongin is here," Ahri stopped as Kyung Soo's eyes widened to see a well-known name attached on the grave.

Yifan let Kyung Soo went to it as he swifted to Ahri. He squeezed her hand, wishing everything to get better with that boy. Kyung Soo kneeled in front of the grave, face blank, and not a word escaped from his mouth.

"Yes Kyung Soo. He's not here physically, anymore. But he will always stay in your heart. He didn't like to see you sad," Ahri stepped closer as a sob heard.

Kyung Soo broke down and cried in front of Jongin's grave. Ahri couldn't contain her tears as Yifan gave her his handkerchief. The cold weather drowned them into undeniable sadness. Yifan tapped on Kyung Soo's shoulder as the boy shrugged to sway it away.

Now he's dead!

You are not worthy to have him anymore!

Why should you live?

"Soo, you must move on. He wants you to be happy," Yifan said gently as he hugged the little boy.

"Don't you remember hyung? I want you to be happy forever. You are my hyung and I love you so much."

Kyung Soo felt all the memories flooded his mind. He wanted to sweep the voices away. He wanted to kill it. A new page waited to be written on with colors. He would cherish Jongin in his heart every second, every time.

"Please be healthy once I got married one day and can't be there for you."

Ahri watched those two and cried too. She knew Kyung Soo's feel of losing someone he loved. The sun was going to set down and she realized. Everything should end soon.

"Soo, we need to go back," Ahri said as Kyung Soo stopped crying and finally stood up.

"Don't worry. I won't run away. I will cooperate," Kyung Soo wiped his tears as Yifan helped him to stand up.

Ahri smiled upon knowing the good-will that Kyung Soo had.

"Let's start over, shall we?" She asked as the sun set that evening.

***

"Kyung Soo!" Ahri hugged the man as Kyung Soo hugged her back in the hospital corridor after Kyung Soo's meeting in the asylum.

"Woah how old this bump?" Kyung Soo amazed by Ahri's pregnancy.

"Seven months already!" Ahri beamed as a man showed up beside her.

"Hi Soo! Nice to see you here!" Yifan came as they shared a brotherly hug.

Kyung Soo smiled upon the married couple in front of him. He silently hope that God would always bless them because they were his angels in the past. He led them to a nearest restaurant by car.

"Why should we meet here? In the hospital is good," Ahri asked as they sat together to have lunch.

"Hospital doesn’t have a good influence to a pregnant woman," Yifan agreed with Kyung Soo's idea.

"So how's life? Already met someone?" Ahri beamed as Yifan stared worriedly at Kyung Soo's response.

Instead of offended, Yifan shocked to see Kyung Soo blushed and Ahri clapped her hand in happiness while asking who that was. He smiled upon hearing the opened door, revealing a gigantic man with popped ears and sparkling eyes.

"I'm sorry, do I interrupt something?" Ahri and Yifan stunned by the low-deep voice from the man.

"Yeol! Meet my best friends," Kyung Soo said as the man smiled and sat beside the smaller man.

"Hello! I'm Soo's boyfriend, Park Chanyeol. Nice to see you two," Chanyeol introduced himself properly as Ahri's eyes sparkled.

"You are sooo cute!" Ahri pinched Chanyeol's cheeks as Yifan shocked by the sudden encounter and Kyung Soo stared worriedly at Chanyeol.

"Woah I'm sorry Chanyeol. She is pregnant. You see, mood swing and such," Yifan quickly apologized on Ahri's behalf as the woman pouted.

"Don't worry. It's totally fine! How old is the baby?" Chanyeol asked nicely.

"Seven months!" Ahri always answered that in cheerful mode and Yifan couldn't be happier to see his wife's excitement.

Kyung Soo smiled to see Chanyeol blended well with Ahri and Yifan. It turned to be Chanyeol who shared about Yura, his sister's pregnancy moment as Ahri listened carefully.

"Woah I don't know that you already had a boyfriend. He's so charming," Yifan asked as Kyung Soo blushed.

"Yes he is," Kyung Soo looked at Chanyeol who chatted with Ahri.

"Everything turned better with you," Yifan sipped his tea.

"Well it's because of you two. I moved on from Jongin. Now it's not that hurt to say his name again," Kyung Soo replied.

"Good then. Well, many things happened. But I'm glad to see you recovered," Yifan said truthfully.

"I'm glad too. I was glad to have you, Ahri nuna, Chanyeol's friends too, Baekhyun and Jongdae. They were both helping me dealing with the court. It was Jongdae who became my lawyer and at last I got my second chance in rehabilitation."

"How did you met with him?" Yifan asked curiously.

"I met him in the facility where he works voluntarily. It was a coincidence because I and couple of rehabilitation patients pointed to work there too. Chanyeol guided us about the work. He is so radiating and all the girls practically squealed. But he only had thing for men. I didn't know why but I knew it," Kyung Soo chuckled upon his prediction.

"He has quite potential," Yifan stared at Chanyeol as Kyung Soo laughed.

"He is nice to me. Really," Kyung Soo added.

"What about the voices?" Yifan referred to one of Kyung Soo's depression symptoms.

"I killed it already," Kyung Soo's gaze was brave and Yifan silently proud of him.

"Great. Then I and Ahri should wait for the invitation, right?" The tallest of them all winked as Kyung Soo blushed.

"It's still far away!" He looked away and Yifan laughed.

"Soo? This is your curry ramyun!" Chanyeol beamed as he took a spoon of it.

"Awww! Feed him! Feed him!" Ahri chorused as Yifan whispered to lower her voice but still, Ahri chanted that.

Chanyeol gladly feed Kyung Soo as the smaller blushed.

"You seemed serious while chatting with Soo. So, when is the invitation arriving to us?" Ahri asked as Chanyeol choked on his drink, hard, and Kyung Soo quickly patted his back.

"Are you okay?" Kyung Soo asked concernly.

"I'm fine. Actually I will think of that," Chanyeol said and Kyung Soo flushed red.

"Don't hesitate to call us for help," Ahri turned to Yifan as he nodded.

"Thank you so much for helping Kyung Soo," Chanyeol bowed a little.

"It's my job in the past," Ahri smiled.

"Should we go home now? You need to rest," Yifan said as Kyung Soo and Chanyeol agreed.

"Okay okay Yifan, let's go home," Ahri said as Yifan stood up to help her.

"Well goodbye nuna. Make sure to come on my wedding with him," Chanyeol said as Kyung Soo nudged his elbow to his boyfriend.

Kyung Soo waved goodbye to Ahri and Yifan as they strolled to the car. They sat again and continued to order more food.

"Do you serious about that marry things?" Kyung Soo suddenly asked.

"Of course, Soo. I do serious," Chanyeol answered as he shocked to hear a sob.

Kyung Soo's tears began to fall because he never met someone like Chanyeol after his dark side showed up. Chanyeol knew who he was and saw him in his worst in the rehabilitation.

For one year, he drowned with many medicines and procedures to make him healthy again. Most of the time, Chanyeol came and comforted him. He helped Kyung Soo went out from the maze of Jongin. He recovered from his urge to kill. He killed his other self right away. All because of Chanyeol's presence.

"Don't cry," Chanyeol wiped the tears away with his thumb.

"I-I'm just happy that you're here," Kyung Soo replied.

"I'm the happiest person in the world for finding you," Chanyeol smiled.

"I love you, Chanyeol," Kyung Soo chanted.

"Love you too," Chanyeol smiled happily.