My fingertips stretched as far as they could and I waved them infront of my face. In the pitch black of my small apartment the most I could see was the barest hint a shadow. Not much, but I continued, this time stretching my arms up towards the ceiling. Even then I could only catch a sliver of the side, it being illuminated by the stray line of light cutting through my shut blinds. I stared at the thin beam, tracing it with my eyes. It was small, definitely not enough to light up the room, but it was still bright all the same. I directed my hand forward, reaching for the light source, playing along the untouchable glow- 

But then the light grew rapidly, covering the room with it's hard glare. I shut my eyes against the sudden change in brightness, turning away from the window. I wasn't even that close to it, how was it so bright?

"Ra Im. " I turned at the unwelcome voice partially in surprise and mostly in irritation. A couple feet away the front door was swung wide open, a tall figure standing in it's frame, one hand over the light switch. He hadn't even taken his shoes off. His eyes were looking right at me, I could feel them. He said nothing, scaning the crumpled figure on the floor infront of him. I stared at the tips of his converse.

"How did you get in?" A detached monotone voice asked him. It was my voice. He slipped out of his shoes, taking soft steps into the living room. "You left your door open." He said simply, taking a seat next to me, his back against the loveseat. There was space between us, our shoulder tips a couple centimeters apart. I pulled my knees to my chest, staring into the warm  brown hue of the coffee table.

"I closed it."

"No you didn't."

"I did." I grit my teeth, already getting annoyed. He didn't seem at all phased, his words smooth and calm. Still, I could feel his gaze direct at the side of my face. 

"You didn't." I refused to look at him. He continued to stare. We sat that way for a while, neither of us speaking to each other. Or maybe it was just me not speaking to him. Eventually he turned forward again, clearing his throat.

"Remember to close the door after you get inside ne- "

"I said I closed it already!" My voice escaped me, loud and aggravated. It was starting to get familiar though, with most of our conversations ending up like this. Without even thinking I turned towards him, my anger controlling my actions. "Why the hell are you here anyway Aron? I didn't ask you to come." I demanded coldly, as usual. He didn't say anything, just staring at me quietly. I stared back. Slowly, a small smile graced his lips. It wasn't wide, just a simple qurk of his mouth. Still, it made his handsome features glow. As usual.

I didn't move, but my temper was beginning to flame. Every single time we argued he would bring out that smile, and every single time I would have to fight the urge to rip it off his face.

Sometimes I couldn't help but wonder why it made me so mad. There was no legitament reason I could think of. Even now, it was just a reminder. He exhaled softly, leaning the slightest fraction closer.

"Ra Im, I don't have any keys. How would I be able to get in otherwise?" His warm honey voice was more then sweet. It was soothing, trying to comfort my frayed nerves. "look," a bundle of ripe produce lay on his other side in a tall

paper bag. "I brought some things, have you eaten yet?" I stared at the brightly colored vegetables peaking through, my stomach churning with a new feeling.

You're such a burden. Making him have to care for you. Exactly like a child.

I turned away, staring down at my mismatched socks. "You shouldn't have." I murmured, my voice small. He ignored that comment, standing and brushing off his pants. The paper bag crinkled as he picked it up, carrying it into the kitchen. I watched his familiar back, broad shouldered and strong as he walked. The bag crinkled again as he set it down on the cold counter and  I turned away, exactly as he turned to me. 

"Are you just going to sit there?" Again, his tone wasn't the slightest bit mean. If anything his voice was light, but I knew better then to ignore the concern that lay underneath.

He took time out of his life to come here and this is what he gets. An idiot lying in the middle of her apartment. Way to go Ra im. 

"What if I want to?" The monotone voice asked again. Again, his eyes bore holes into the side of my head.

"And what if I want some help?" He asked. I met his eyes, refusing to give in.

"You really want to put me in a kitchen?" He stopped, and one of those small smiles made it's way onto his face. I quickly turned away, a feeling growing in my stomach. I hadn't meant to be funny, but it was no secret my cooking was not the best. 

"Alright then." he agreed, and I felt my shoulders relax a bit. This was good. With me here and him there, may be he won't try to start a con- 

"So how was your day?" Damn. It was like he always knew the perfect thing to do to make me annoyed

. My hands involuntarily balled into fists and I hid them under my bent legs.

"Fine."

"Just fine?" 

"Just fine."

"What did you do that was so fine?" 

"Stuff."

"What kind of stuff?"

"Does that necessarily matter?" The agitation in my voice was obvious. Why couldn't I compose myself in times like this? Why was I getting so worked up? 

It was him.  He just couldn't stop prying. A soft rhythmic clank broken our momentary silence. He was cutting up the vegetables, to make a dish I didn't know and would probably try to refuse. As usual.

"Just making small talk." I could hear the smile now, soft and light as always. We were such opposites now, completely different in every facet. Aron had grown into a personality that was unlike any other I've ever known before. He was always kind and polite. N

ot the kind that came with formality but the genuine kind of care that you could tell came from his heart. It also helped that he had his tall, lean figure and handsome features. The deadly combination was enough to win the hearts of men and women alike wherever he went. Especially the women. But he would never admit that, even though we both knew it.

I on the other hand was the contrast to him, like the dull shadow to a vivid light. I was ordinary, plain. I couldn't be as outgoing or open to others like he was. I wasn't as smart, clever, or have a charm that could make people like me.

How could they? 

 It still surprised me that he came to visit as often as he did when he could go be the beloved person he was.

"Okay,  I guess I'll just leave Ra Im out of this one," he singsonged, humming along to a made up song. I watched him out of the corner of my eyes. He was completely focused on the food, not noticing my gaze. I took the chance to analyze his creme coloured face. It was made sharp by his jawline and cheekbones. His nose was slim and straight, and held his black thick rimmed glasses perfectly.

His eyes were downcast, and I could see the thickness of his long lashes. They were caught in light above them and casted shadows over his chocolate eyes. But even then they were still bright. I could tell, even from here.

I let my eyes linger over him a moment longer before looking away. All the while, my heart beat funny. I held a fist over my left side, gently pounding the sensation away. I couldn't think weird things, Aron would be able to read it of my face in a second.

The chopping sounds faded away. I kept my gaze straight ahead, praying he wasn't looking this way. There was no sound for a moment, until I finally heard the gentle plops of the food landing into a pot. I let out a silent sigh, still not letting myself turn around. 

"Where are the pasta noodles? " Aron's voice floated up, and my  heart immediately lurched. Stupid heart.

"In the cupboard." I muttered. The sounds of doors opening and closing filled my ears.

"I don't see them. You sure you bought some?" I fought the reflex to snap at the question.

"Yes, I did." I answered curtly.

"Well, could you help me find them?" Sometimes I really hated when he talked like that. It was like the quirk in his smile had seeped into his voice.

"Top cupboard. Second to the left." I said flatly. A single door creaked open.

"Nope. Nothing." I sigh frustratedly, curses sputtering off my lips. I stood up, marching into the cramped kitchen. He stood in front of the open cupboard, blinking at me. I reached over him, standing on my tiptoes, and grabbed the plastic bag that was perched just at the edge of the opening. In perfect view.

I shoved it into his hands, and his eyes widened.

"That's where it was?" A strangled noise escaped my mouth. It sounded like a cross between scoff and a screech. His eyed me for a moment. I glared back, communicating my irritation my gaze. We stayed like that for a moment, until he reached over me, setting the bag onto the counter next to the cutting board. I shuffled back a bit, but his arm still ended up brushing mine. There wasn't really any room at all, the space only really meant for one person. 

I tried moving back more, but Aron's gaze held me in place. 

"Why not stay here?" He murmured, the joking tone dropped. I paused, looking elsewhere.

"I'm not allowed in a kitchen remember?" 

"I could teach you then." He said without missing a beat. I looked up, my face impassive. Internally, I was surprised. He had never suggested something like this before. 

Without warning, he grasped my arm, pulling me in front of the board. I tried to pull back, but he placed himself behind me, preventing any chance for escape. I stood rigidly in place, highly aware of his presence. Even though there was a good amount of space between us, it was closer then usual.

"We'll need some carrot and some bell pepper. Cut them up into bite size bits." He murmured from behind. I swallowed hard, glaring down at the vegetables in front of me. Slowly I picked up the knife and one of the long carrots. Even before I started I knew it wasn't going to work. The pieces quickly became either onion-skin thin or too thick to bite.

"Hold it still," a hand held my wrist, stabilizing it as it held the carrot. I tensed up, suddenly aware that he wasn't as far as I thought he was. Warmth radiated into my skin, and my grip tightened. 

"I know." Twisting my hand so his slid off, I stepped closer to the cutting board. My hips brushed against the counter edge, but I stayed still, hoping to keep some more distance between us.

"Fine." He sighed, his voice floating backwards  I internally sighed with relief, keeping my gaze glued to the board.

It was quiet again, this time the soft clanks of my knife filling our lack of conversation. Eventually he joined in with the methodical noise, fiddling with the pot and tiny stove next to him. I didnt bother to turn, knowing he was still being wary of my presence.

It was your idea for me to cook, don't blame me if my cut off fingers get mixed in with the food.

I grabbed a freshly washed bell pepper, hacking away at the thick stem.

"Ra Im," my hand halted over the food, and I felt my heart thump funny again. An arm crossed into my peripheral vision, guiding my gaze ahead. "I think your phone's ringing." Sure enough, the said object was alight but silent from it's perch on the coffee table.

I stared dumbly at the screen for a moment, and a chuckle erupted from behind me. "So once you finally get yourself into a kitchen you don't come out?" Aron slipped out from behind me and into the living room, snatching the phone before I could give him a proper retort. I glared at his side profile, opening my mouth to demand that he release my device, or at least to provide some sort of snaky remark that would get rid of the quirk on the corner of his lips.

But then, his smile began to fade. His eyes slowly losing their light.

My words retreated into the back of my throat and I stared at his lone form in front of my couch. "What are you doing?" I asked. He didn't respond, his gaze slowly becoming darker at the still lit screen.

I grabbed a dish towel, wiping my hands clean before striding over to him, a hand outstretched to retrieve my phone. At the last second he shifted back, avoiding my arm. I glared at his face, my irritation ever growing.

"Give it. The call is for me idiot, not you." But he wouldn't let me take it back. I tried multiple times to claim the phone but he wouldnt give it up. Eventually the screen went dark, the call being sent to voicemail. I gave him a disbelieving look at his stubbornness.

Why would he tell me I had an incoming call if he wasn't going to let me picked it up? What was with him?!

"What was that for- " I asked harshly, but immediately stopped at the look on his face. His warm features were rigid with tension, and his eyes had hardened with anger. I couldn't help but freeze, bewildered at his sudden hostility. 

The screen lit up again, partially covered from his long fingers. We both looked to it at the same time, not saying anything. Aron tensed up even more, his jaw set tightly.

"Look, I really think I should get that." I tried again, his sudden dark mood throwing me off guard. My face was still poised with it's usual emotionless mask, but my mind was a torrent of thought.

What was it that was making him so angry? Nothing out of the ordinary could make him like this. "If it's not important then I can just- " 

"No." He cut me off, my phone clutched tightly in his hand. His gaze was so intense, my heart seizing in my chest. I had to remind myself to breathe.

"Who is it Aron." I spoke quietly, my hushed tone slicing through the quiet room. He held my gaze, not saying a word. 

The screen went dark, signalling the end of the call. We didn't move though, still stuck in our sudden staring contest. I tried to read his face, find some sort of visible clue. What could make him change so drastically in such a short amount of time? 

Who could make him change like this? 

I got my answer a couple seconds later.

A loud bang jolted me up, out of Aron's captive gaze. I whipped around, just in time to notice my front door shudder. It trembled again, and I flinched at the series of bangs and crashes that came with it.

"Ra Im! " a voice slurred, loud and disoriented. A voice that made my heart stop, and

the blood running through my veins turn to ice. 

 

 A sudden exhale reached my left ear, and a blur of heat strode past me. I didn't move, didn't try to react as Aron unbolted the latch and swung the door to my apartment open. The person looked up,  and his face twisted at the sight of the other male.

"What the hell are you doing here?!" He roared, his eyes ablaze. I felt my throat close up at once, my legs suddenly feeling like lead weights.

Of all people, there was no one else that could make me feel so pained, angry and terrified at the same time. 

"Why are you in her apartment

?!" The enraged man said. He stepped in, coming eye to eye with Aron, eyes bloodshot and livid. Those eyes, the ones that would crinkle in the corners with every smile, looked so disgusted and filled with hatred now. Like the glimmer they once held didn't exist anymore.

 "So what?" Aron spoke, and I internally shuddered at his frigid tone. It was like the temperature suddenly dropped ten degrees from his tone alone. "You have nothing to do with her anymore. What she does and who she's with doesn't concern you." It didn't even sound like him anymore, his voice too menacing to seem real. 

"What did you say?! BASTARD!" the man roared again, throwing his arm back, fist at the ready. An involuntary shriek escaped my lips and I stalked forward a step, my mask breaking. 

In that split second, my mind could only think of one thing. 

He swung his fist forward. Even intoxicated, his sudden strength and speed made it deadly. Aron lunged to the side, narrowly dodging it. The man staggered, caught in his drunken daze, but quickly lunged again. Aron caught him by the wrist, and they were eye to eye.

"Get out. Before I hurt you." His voice was like velvet, smooth and calm and lethal with it's threat. The man smiled, but it was like plastic. Fake and cold.

"Well, look who grew up, " he sneered "do you think just because you got yourself pretty clothes and learned how to dodge a fist that you're any better then before?" Aron didn't say anything, but I could feel the line of his patience growing thin, threatening to snap at the crossing into bad territory. 

No. Don't you dare bring up the past. Don't you dare. You have no right!

I wanted to scream, but my lips remained sealed and my body still. 

"Disgusting brat, know your place!" He spat "Only people like you would try to intervene in things that don't concern you. How long have you been here, pestering my Ra Im-"

"Your Ra Im? " A quiet chuckle escaped Aron's lips, but it was mirthless. "You lost that privilege. Don't tell me you forgot."

It was scary. Aron's voice hadn't ventured any higher or changed in volume since the start. The fact he could still remain so composed only made his words all the more threatening. The hand that held my ex-boyfriend's wrist slowly tightened, the said arm beginning to shake from the added pressure.

"After everything you've done, did you think you could just come back into her life? Did you actually believe you had the right to be here?" His face began to twist,  the pain becoming evident in his drunken features. Aron didn't ease up, tightening his grip more and more until the later was forced to cry out sharply.

"Let's get something clear," his voice was getting quiet, the hand in his grip beginning to bend in an unsafe angle. " You have no right. So don't get that delusional. You mean nothing now. Got it?" 

Despite the pain, my ex-boyfriend managed a tiny smirk, meeting Aron's gaze directly. "So you think you do then?"

"Aron," I breathed, surprising us all by speaking. But was too much, they were being too much. It had to stop, my anxiety pushing past my shock and pain and forcing me to speak. Aron stilled, but he didn't show any signs of backing down. "Please."  How was I still talking? My mind and body felt so numb, I wasn't even sure it was my voice that was hearing. It was too soft. Too fragile sounding.

 

It was a full minute before Aron reacted, easing his grip on the wrist in his hand. The latter wrenched it free, eyes regaining their cold exterior. 

"Leave. Now." Aron ordered. The latter scoffed, eyes narrowing. He stepped forward again, as if completely forgetting the imbalance of power between then two.

"I don't need to take any ing orders from you bast- " 

"Try and take one more step. I can't guarantee you'll still be standing if you do."

"Aron!" I breathed, taking another step forward. It was a stagger, my body too sluggish to react to the situation.

"Pathetic. The only way you can solve your problems is through your fists right?" He just couldn't stop pushing. Edging even closer the man gave Aron a wide sneer, and I could slowly begin to smell the overpowering scent of alcohol wafting from him. "People like you just parade around like you own , but in reality, what the do you really have? Oh, nothing. " He cocked his head, his mouth popped open in an exaggerated 'o'. 

"Just a little, poor...homeless boy." He whispered, taunting the latter with glinting eyes. "No family, no little friends to talk too. Can't even try to make something of yourself other then your badass image.

"You just thrived from that didnt you? Trapping girls with your mysterious bad boy look then leeching off of them for everything they had. But that wasnt enough! You just had to come and leech off my girl, like the sick-" 

Aron gripped his collar violently, cutting off the latter from speaking. "You just don't seem to learn. She isn't yours anymore, not since you ing cheated on her. And she never will be." His hand grew tighter against the latter's neck. "I, personally, will see to that." 

"Ra Im still has feelings for me!" My ex yelled, his voice slurring over with his increased volume. Aron ignored his cries, shoving him towards the door. "She does! Of course she does! You do!" For the first time since he arrived, his gaze flickered to me.

His eyes were wild, a mix of arrogance, anger and drunken haze that made my stomach churn. He was almost unrecognizable, mouth open wide and yelling, even after Aron pushed him out of the threshold and into the hallway, slamming the door in his face.

That didn't deter him, muffled cries and occasional banging coming from outside the door. Otherwise it was silent, the only sound between us being Aron's breathing. I didn't move, staring  straight ahead, boring holes into Aron's broad shoulders.

Don't believe what he said. That wasn't true. None of it was true.

So many thoughts and emotions were colliding into each other all at once in my mind. I wanted to speak, to explain myself just as much as I wanted to melt into the floor and disappear. What did I want to explain? How was I supposed to react? How was I going to fix this? And why wouldn't Aron turn around?

"Ra Im, " he murmured, his voice suddenly sounding far away. My heart thumped hard against my chest and my gaze flickered up to the back of his head. I didn't say a word. "Ra...Im." He turned slowly, his hands fallen to his sides. More cries and bangs still came from behind him, but Aron didn't react. Like he couldn't hear them anymore. "What are you thinking right now?"

I locked gazes with him, my eyes widening at the question. My body was still stuck in shock, my face still and hard. He took a slow step forward. His eyes still hadn't regained their warmth, an undecipherable look in their place.

"I hadn't lied when I said that, right?" Now I could feel my eyebrows furrowing. What did he mean? What was he talking about? As if he could read my mind he spoke, answering the question I didn't even ask. "You don't feel for him anymore." He was getting closer, and my eyes downcasted to the collar of his shirt. "You don't like him anymore..." he murmured quietly, gaze directed down at me.

Why was I looking away? Why couldn't I look him in the eyes?

This wasn't right. He was wrong. Aron was right, and he had to be wrong. I didn't miss him. I didn't. I didn't care about my ex, not anymore. I couldn't.

"I..I d-on't." why was I stuttering? My heartbeat sped up and I felt my head sink lower, farther from Aron's gaze.

My chest was constricting, being suffocated moment by moment that I stood there. Suddenly my eyes began to sting, blurring my vision of his grey socks and making me clamp my lips shut.

"Don't you dare cry. Don't cry over that jerk." 

I was so stupid. Because in that moment, when I should of been thinking about how horrible and disgusting it was for him to barge drunk and crazed, I was thinking of the crinkle he used to have in his eyes. I was thinking about the smiles he used to give me and how much my heart would speed up because of it. I was thinking of his embrace and how warm it was whenever he used to hug me. I

 was thinking about his hands and how they used to fit into mine.

I was thinking about everything; his expressions, his quirks, his laugh. All of it came crashing into me at once, trampling over my heart and making it dull with pain.

I hated those memories so much it made me feel sick, because with each and every single one came the realization of how much I loved them.

I let out a shaky exhale, closing my eyes and feeling trails of tears stream down my cheeks. Almost instantly warm fingers wiped them away and tilted my chin up. I opened my eyes, meeting Aron's dark ones.

"I...I..." He was going to hate me. I just knew it. It was too late to hide, he could see everything: my pain, anxieties, and weaknesses, all with a glance. Just like that, I was going to lose the last remaining person by my side, all because of my stupid lovesick heart.

"Stop, don't cry." I tried to comply, rubbing my eyes with the sleeve of my sweater furiously. His watchful gaze fell over the crown of my head, and eventually his hand pried mine away from my face. I held my breath, waiting for his judgement. I couldn't look up, the look of disappointment would just be too much.

He sighed slightly, his hand coming up to my face again. "You don't love him. Not anymore." He spoke softly past my tears. Gently he wiped the fresh ones as they fell before lowering his hand. "It's the memories you miss right now. The emotions you felt, not the person you shared them with. " I couldn't meet his gaze, but I could feel it imploring, trying to get me to respond. I didn't know anymore, my mind a chaotic mess.

"He was never the only person in your heart." He murmured, his voice calm, certain. "He held a part," my eyes flickered up to his, and somewhere beneath my tears, I could feel my chest tighten. "He never had the whole thing." 

His expression was unreadable, but his eyes were suddenly so intense I couldnt look away. Slowly, his long slender fingers found their way to the side of my face, tracing the curve of my cheek to my jaw. His touch was so faint, but it felt like it was searing me. I could feel its trail growing longer, from my jaw to the slip of my earlobe, up the tip of my ear, and into the roots of my hair. 

I couldn't move, my mind too lost to process what he was doing. It was his eyes, so warm, so rich, they were keeping me prisoner within them. I could feel my heart hammering against my chest, so loud and hard I was sure he could hear it.

He didn't move, watching. Waiting for me to react. I couldn't, no matter how much I tried. I should have been thinking how wrong this was. I should have been trying to stop it.

The trail continued, his hands venturing deeper into the roots of my hair. Warmth enveloped my side as his other hand rested lightly over my hip, coaxing me the slightest bit closer. We were only a couple centimetres apart now, and I could feel the heat radiating from his body. 

"Ra Im," Aron 's eyes were so serious, boring deep into mine. The closer I looked the more endless they seemed, like an abyss of dark brown. The warmth around my side grew and I reacted fast, pulling away quickly before he could trap me in his arms. 

"Wait!" I stopped him, turning around so my back faced him. Blood roared over my cheeks and I let out a breath I didn't even know I  had been holding. What had he been trying to do?! Never, ever had Aron acted this way.

 I couldn't make sense of it, and even if I could I wasn't even sure I wanted to. It was enough to break my mind out of the dark mood it had been and into a grey. One where I was slow to react, overfilled with touch, heat, and the sound of his breathing

Our relationship was something I sometimes thought I understood like the back of my hand but at other times could make me feel like I was fumbling around in the dark. I wasnt even sure how to describe it. It-we were close, sometimes more close then I thought possible.

He always seemed to be a step ahead of me now, where as before, it was me who was insightful.

I would know what was going on inside his head just from a glance. No matter how much he tried to deny it, I could always figure him out. As our friendship grew, the more I could find from him. His eyes, his hands, the way he stood; he could never really hide anything, because he was always be an open book. 

But then he changed. Me along with him.

 He didnt say a word, my thundering heart the only thing my mind could register. Ever so slowly, the warmth returned. It wrapped around my waist and bloomed over my back. My cheeks grew an even darker rouge and instinctively I tried to push him off.

"W-what are you doing?!" He didn't respond, only burying his face into the curve of my neck. My eyes widened and my mouth fell open in shock, his heat spreading over me in waves. Soft locks of his brown hair tickled my jaw as he burrowed deeper. I could feel the press of his forehead, the outline of his nose, and my heart nearly exploded from fright.

He wrapped his arms tighter, preventing me from escaping, and let his cool lips press softly into my bare skin. The sensation was so soft, so riveting, like velvet. I let out an involuntary gasp, but he still wouldn't let me go.

"Wha-what..." He was close. Too close. I couldn't think. I couldn't even breathe. The touch of his lips lifted slowly, only to press down again firmly at the base of my neck. My pulse sparked, and a rush of heat ripped through my body. I tried to breathe.

"Wh-at are you doing?" My voice shook slightly. So many emotions surged through me, making it impossible to think straight.

"What does it feel like I'm doing?" Another kiss. This time dangerously close to the edge of my jaw.

"Y-you," He turned his head, his lips grazing over my earlobe and making me shiver. Strong arms cupped my shoulders, turning me around and making me look at him.

His chocolate brown orbs were smoldering, like there was a fire ignited within them. The unreadable expression he had was wiped clean off his faced, replaced with something impossible to ignore.

"Why can't I?" Aron's 

voice was low, as if he wouldn't speak any louder. I didn't move or speak, my voice lost within his gaze. He pressed closer, and my calves met the plush edge of the couch. That didnt deter him, and he eliminated the space between us, our bodies pressing together.

Not the smallest hint of space left.

His hands wound around me again, his eyes demanding attention. "Honestly...you," his sighed, a bemused look on his face. It contrasted against the intensity of his eyes. "Only you could remain this oblivious." I stared at him, not comprehending.

"Oblivious? To what?" I was terrified. All I could think about was how close he was, and how I couldn't think straight because of it. 

I didn't want this. I couldn't want this. I wanted to be alone. Without someone visiting me. Without someone watching over me. Making me food when I wouldn't eat it. Talking to me when I wouldn't listen. I placed my hand over his chest, as if to place space between my self and him. Instead, I found his heartbeat, as rapid and erratic as mine. If not faster.

I had to stop him. Stop this before it got worse.

" I-I don't get what yo- " I didn't finish, because in one split second Aron's lips crashed against mine. In that split second I was a statue, my mind completely disconnecting from my own body. I tensed up, alarmed, but it was like he expected me to, his arms winding around me the slightest bit tighter.

I couldn't think or feel anything anymore but his lips on mine, his arms around my waist, his hand in my hair. His lips were so soft, gentle, and careful. The way he moved them against mine was almost hypnotic, lulling me. Or intoxicating me.

Surprisingly, I didn't feel scared, or even violated. Instead, the shock was melting ever so slowly, bubbling down into an euphora. I could barely handle the sweet sensations his kiss was giving me. I could feel it, from the crown of my head to the tips of my toes. It made me shiver, but not out of dislike. His lips were putting me under a spell, one that I couldn't break away from.

So I crashed.

My hands wound around his neck, bringing him as close as possible. My fingers explored the soft roots of his hair, at the same time pulling him into me. For a second, a soft sigh escaped his lips, his whole body relaxing against me. My body immediately responded, molding itself into him.

The moment didnt last, the peace quickly disappating into something stronger, more intense.

The kiss was growing, becoming more anxious, urgent. He tilted his head slightly, urging me closer, even when we were as close as possible. I could feel distress and anxiousness, as if it was slipping through him into my outstretched fingertips. It was as if this was a parting kiss, one that would never be enough no matter how long it was stretched. No matter how hard I kissed him it wasn't enough. I had to get closer, I suddenly needed more of him.

Heat was all I could feel, coursing through my viens and making my heart a relentless drum. The lack of oxygen made my head spin but I didn't let go. I...didn't want to. Finally it was getting to a point that neither of us could stand, and Aron pulled away.

A gasp escaped my lips, oxygen filling my lungs. My mouth throbbed, and I could feel soft picks from where his lips touched mine. His breaths were laboured too, a rosy glow on his cheeks. His eyes were wide and bright, the light catching them again. I looked away, fighting the blush I knew was already spreading. He wouldn't let me ignore him though, his hands coming to cup the sides of my face. 

"Look at me." He breathed softly, his mouth hovering over mine. The space between us had never decreased, our bodies still moulded against each other perfectly. I tensed, waiting.  For a kiss or for his words I didn't know anymore. 

"Wh-why...what did we-" I heard myself say. It wasn't a monotone anymore though. I could hear my own confusion mixed in with breathlessness. He leaned down, his warm breath ghosting over my cheek and neck. 

He exhaled, sending a wave of shivers over me from his warm breath. Anymore and my legs would give out. "It's because you never liked him only," he leaned back, just enough so we could lock gazes again. He bumped his forehead against mine, closing his eyes. "This whole time, there's been a place for me too." I stared at his fluttering lashes at a lost for words.

He opened his eyes, a sparkle of warmth within them. "Maybe not at first, but then you could never really leave me alone. You were so stubborn." The corners of his lips lifted, and I was met with a blinding smile.

"You spent so much time around me. Remember the way I reacted? It was harsh." I stared blankly at him, 

but the memories were already falling into place.

 

He had been a bit...cranky to say the least.

"Honestly, it was because I thought I hated you at first." He spoke softly, his gaze never leaving mine. "Everything you did was so bright and happy. I thought it was annoying, because it was so different from what I was used to. You were so different. Though, I never hated it. I actually liked it. A lot." He hesitated a moment, his arms subconsciously tightening around me. "So much that it made me afraid. Maybe if you knew about what people thought about me, and the rumors they made, you would leave. It made me want to push you away even more.

"Though, looking back at that now, I think it just made you hold on. You never really judged me, or tried to leave when people told you to." He sighed again, a slight chuckle escaping his lips. "Even when he told you not to you still didn't listen. I think then... that was one of the first things I started to love about you." My cheeks burned crimson, my heart thundering in my chest. Aron's gaze never wavered, seeing deep within mine.

"You know, most of what he said was a lie. I never tried to take anything from anyone, and I didn't try to keep an image for myself. Though, I am alone. I don't have a family, and up until now, I didn't really have any friends to call my own." I knew. I had known from the start, and at some point he became aware of that fact. It was another reason we managed to get closer. "Also, my personality wasn't that great before, because of the past I have. You got first hand experience of it." His eyes grew serious, never losing their intensity. "But I changed. I got better, and I'm still improving because of you." My eyes widened in shock as I tried to step back. All I managed was a small fumble, Aron holding me securely in place. He watched me closely, measuring my reaction. "I mean it. " There was no flicker, no crack within his expression. I couldn't find anything other then pure sincerity. "You made me want to change myself. All of this, the person I am now, is because of you."

"But why?" I blurted, my hands balling into involuntary fists against his chest. "How could you mean that? That can't- "

That can't be true. I can't mean so much to one person. It's not possible.

He couldn't mean it. This had to be a mistake. 

"You don't believe me?" He murmured. One of his hands reached up, gently brushing some strands of my hair away from my face. "It's the truth Ra Im."

No. It couldn't be. After all this time fighting, crying, convincing myself how hopeless and impossible something like love was, he couldn't be saying something like this. It couldn't be real. 

I let my gaze fall, my fists silently beginning to shake. He stared at at me, not saying anything. Eventually, I felt his heat surround me again. Gently, as if I was made of glass.

"I know you're afraid. Even though we've known each other for so long." His voice was barely over a whisper, soft and warm against my ear.  "It's so hard to trust, but it's even harder to stay alone. I know it might take some time, but I hope you'll understand someday how much I mean what I'm saying right now." He held me just the slightest bit tighter, turning his head in towards me. "Just don't push me away anymore, please. Give me time to prove it to you. Let me show you that it's possible," He pulled back again, a smile gracing his lips. Glowing and beautiful. "Just like how you showed me...

when you found me in my darkness."