Recording...

 

 

Hum...Right. Year 2083, Day 03, month February. My name is Heo Youngji, age 21. Just a few days ago I went to the Medical Center and [sighs]I discovered I don’t have that much time to live due to a terminal disease that it’s been growing on my body since birth. I [pause] won’t go into details, that’s not important right now. I decided that I should record everything that happens to me from now on, so even if I’m not here anymore, my memories won’t let my existence fade away into nothingness.

So, let’s start.

The world we once knew as something stable and full of life couldn’t have become any less than that. As the Third World War exploded, all the nations fought to complete destruction. Thirty years of helpless screaming, deaths, and blood, so much spilled blood. The life we knew had completely disappeared in the blink of an eye. The world had all but burnt down to ashes. For us, who weren’t on the battle fields, it seemed to go on for a lifetime. We all hoped to see the end of it, and we did. But has it truly ended?

Didn’t we all heard about the astronomic destruction the previous two wars had brought? Don’t we know that in the end they meant very little? Why didn’t the humanity learn for God’s sake? What [pause][whisper] what’s going to become of us? It’s happening again. We’re making the same thing our ancestors did, living the same thing they lived.

An error.

 

Recording Finished.

 

 

“Good morning, Miss Heo.” A nice old man from my workplace greeted me as I ascended the stairs.

I looked at him and cracked a smile.

“Good to see you taking a walk, Mr. Gardner!” I answered as I walked by him to go change my clothing so I could work.

The place I spent most of my time was this one. My workplace is a Health Care House, an asylum were people from an advanced age came to rest and take care of themselves till it was…time to go.

The main reason I choose to work here was for the knowledge. I mean, the elder here have lived things I could never even imagine, and they always told me stories. For me that was born after a war, it was very refreshing to hear about how the world was once a joyful place to live in.

I entered the changing room, opened my locker and took out my working attire that consisted of a simple white shirt and a light green apron, I kept my jeans and sneakers.

I tied my hair up as I walked to the main room.

“Youngji-ah, morning.” I turned around at the low baritone voice of my co-worker.

“Hey, Wonsik. Good morning.” I smiled but didn’t stop walking.

He walked fast so he could reach me.

“Are you in a rush?” He asked amused.

I chuckled.

“That’s not it, but it’s time for breakfast and you know how they get grumpy if it’s served late, especially Mr. Han!” I laughed remembering of the old man’s antics. The time we were late serving the breakfast, Mr. Han was completely certain that we were trying to kill him earlier by not giving him food, just so we could have something of his that he called ‘glass stars’, or something of the sort.

Wonsik chuckled too, probably replaying the scene like I did.

“Yeah, I still remember the feeling of the kick he gave me on my ankle.” He said.

We both entered the main room just as the elderly were coming in and sitting at random places. We took all the serving tools and food and started distributing to them all.

After we finished, I cleaned my hands on my apron and just stood by in case they needed something.

“Youngji-ah!” I heard someone call me.

I turned around and smiled as Miss Jeon called me over.

I walked there and sat on the sofa as she gestured me to do so.

“Good morning, Miss Jeon. Do you need anything?” I greeted cheerfully.

Out of all the people here, I like Miss Jeon the best, she was a joyful old lady, that had so much youngness in her eyes and view of the world, and she never failed to make me smile. Never.

“Morning, sweetie. But I didn’t call you here for that. So, how is it going with Wonsik there? I saw you two arriving together today again!” She said almost squealing, which was something fun to see, really.

I laughed.

“Oh, come on Ms. Jeon, haven’t I already told you that we have nothing like that between us? We’re just good friends.” I answered.

Ms Jeon scolled at me.

“Oh, of that I seriously doubt! He’s such a handsome young man, caring and smart too! And you’re always together!” She cried.

“Please, of course we’re always together, there’s not that many people working here, and of those who do work in here, we are the closest in age, so it’s only natural we stick together.”

Ms Jeon rolled her eyes.

“Ah yes, it must be so hard to have to be together with such a fine man.” She said sarcastically. “Fool yourself all you want, my dear, I know what I saw!” She joked.

I laughed and shook my head.

The day passed by like that, like it always did: peaceful, calm and without much trouble.

I was taking a walk around as I heard someone crying.

I looked around desperate trying to find where it came from.

I ran outside and looked around in the garden. My eyes fell on a figure sitting on a bench, from the way her shoulders were shaking, I assumed it was her I heard crying earlier.

“Excuse me.” I said as I got close enough.

The old lady was startled as she looked up at me with drenched eyes, and it broke my heart. I didn’t know her, so she must have just gotten in here.

“Oh, I’m sorry, am I bothering you?” I asked.

She shook her head and wiped her eyes.

“So, can I ask what happened? Maybe I can be of help?” I tried again.

She looked at me intensely. For a while, that was all she did, stare like she was studying me.

“Yes. Please yes.” Was all she said at first.

I blinked. Then I sat down beside her.

“You just came in here, right?” I asked.

She answered right away this time.

“Yes, but I shouldn’t be in here! He needs me! He won’t, he won’t accept..He…he’ll leave!” She said nonsensically.

“Wait, who, who will leave?” I asked confused.

She got silent and turned to me.

“You, you can help. You might be able to help him. He’ll listen to you. Eventually. You have to stop him, he…he’ll destroy himself!” She said and almost started crying again.

“Miss, please. Who are you talking about?” I asked hopelessly.

“Hongbin. My nephew. He needs help!” She said desperate.

I furrowed my eyebrows.

“Okay, but what, is he sick? He needs money, what?” I asked.

The old lady shook her head.

“He needs… he needs…” She stopped talking and only smiled.

She then raised her hand and my hair, still smiling.

“You. You’re the one he needs.” She said.

Okay. That was officially the creepiest moment of my life.

“How can he need me. We don’t even know each other…” I mumbled.

“No, you don’t. But I’m sure if it’s you he can be saved!” The lady said with such happiness like she discovered the most delightful thing ever.

“Wha…” I started saying but I was interrupted.

“I don’t have much time, but I would like to live enough to see him smile again. So, here.” She gave me a piece of paper. “Go see him, please, he needs you.” She said and stood up.

I only looked at her dumbfounded as she left mumbling incoherent things.

For a while I just started into nothing.

Was that lady insane? How could I save someone I don’t even know. What did she mean when she said he’s leaving? Destroy himself…is her nephew crazy too?

I… I don’t have to do it do I? Was she even for real?

 

 

 

I ended up coming.

I looked sadly at the piece of paper with an address written on it that was given to me by an insane old lady a few days ago.

Then I looked up at the house in front of me. It was big, but not enormous. It wasn’t luxurious, but it was well cared and it was clear that who lived there had money.

I walked through the beautiful garden until I reached the front door. I raised my hand so I could ring the bell

Godness am I really doing it? It could be some sort of trap for all I know.

I sighed deeply and pressed the doorbell anyway.

The song echoed around and I shivered.

After a couple of minutes just standing there, I didn’t hear any footsteps. It was getting obvious that or the owner was not at home, or he did not want to be bothered.

I was setting my mind to leave when I heard a loud noise from inside. I widened my eyes cause the noise surely was from something falling, and hard at that.

I went closer and started knocking on the door.

“Excuse me, please, is everything alright in there?” I kept knocking.

I tried to open the door and surprisingly it did open quite easily. The door was unlocked. I pushed the door open but stood outside. I took a look inside and only saw a pair of big stairs and some corridors.

I heard some more noise and decided to go in.

“Sorry for intruding.” I mumbled even though no one was there to hear me.

I walked in slowly and closed the door behind me quietly. I looked at the three corridors and choose to take the one on the left. I found a neat living room and a even neater open kitchen. Everything was so clean and tidy, that it didn’t even feel like someone was living in there.

I walked around slowly. I got deeper in the house and at one corner, at the very end on the house, there were more stairs, but they didn’t lead to the next floor like the ones I saw earlier, they led to a single door, centered at the middle of the wall. The door was open and I could see the room was dark, but there was some sort of flickering blue light coming from inside there. I decided to take a closer look. I got close to the stairs.

“Who are you?” I heard a deep and weak voice call up at me.

I got the scare of my life and turned around abruptly, almost losing my balance on the process.

I was met with a young man, probably a little older than me. He had very nice features, and a strong body that could be seen through his open button up white shirt and loose jeans. But even though he was handsome, I could clearly see that he was dead tired, and even though he was well built it was obvious that he was too thin to be healthy.

I couldn’t form words and he kept glaring at me.

“You should not be in here.” He said again, taking me out of my daze.

“I’m sorry. I was outside and I heard a loud falling noise and I got worried. I tried knocking but the door was unlocked so…” I ranted on.

“Doesn’t matter. Leave.” He said as he turned around.

It all happened to fast. The man turned around and I was about to talk again but saw him waver and start falling on the ground. I didn’t even process, but a few seconds later I found myself on the floor trying my best to hold the stranger’s torso, avoiding his head from hitting the hard wood floor.

“Are you alright?” I asked completely worried.

The man could barely keep his eyes open, he was breathing heavily and reaching for something. I looked at the direction his hand was going and saw some medications on a table.

“Medicine? You need them?” I asked but didn’t even wait for him to answer, he obviously needed it.

I put his head carefully on the floor and took all the packages I could find around. I went back to him and helped him sit and rest his back at the wall. He kept his eyelids open, but just a little, and he was obviously doing a lot of effort to keep them like that.

“Which one is it?” I asked, barely holding my nerves.

I showed him all I took.

He lift his arm that seemed heavy and pointed to some blue pills on the far left of my opened hands. I let go of all the meds except for the blue one.

“This one? How many??” I asked again.

He was breathing heavily and didn’t seem to be able to form words.

I was about to cry from desperation.

“Fine, please just blink at me if I’m right! Do you need just one?” I instructed.

He didn’t blink.

“Two?” I tried again.

Blink. He needed two pills then.

I almost spilled all the pills as I quickly took two and put them on his mouth. I gently lifted his head backwards so he could swallow. He took a while, but I saw his throat muscles working and he finally swallowed the medicine.

He then closed his eyes and seemingly fell asleep.

I sighed heavily. What even…

I looked at the stranger and he had a peaceful look now. Then I stood up and looked around.

“This person seem exhausted. He probably worked himself to the limit. That would explain why this house seems unlived in.” My eyes stopped at the kitchen. “I’ll wait for him to wake up and make sure he’s well, then I’ll get the hell out of here.”

I nodded at my plan and walked to the kitchen.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ERROR

 

I stared intensely at the screen as it showed me the same damn five letters, like it’s been doing for the past five years.

I screamed and tossed all the paper on my desk aside in fury.

Why is it not working? Why can’t I see happiness again? Is it even right for me to be the only one here? All of them left… and I stayed. What for? Why?

I am barely holding up. Five years working on the same thing, and seven of pure loneness.

It is even supposed to work? Am I kidding myself? Am I trying to do the impossible? The unreachable? Something unnatural?

 No. They said we would meet again.

They did. They promised. I promised they would see me again. See each other. See the world.

But is there even anything worth seeing?

NO!

I won’t give up. Not now. Not… not…

 

Ding Dong

 

I whipped my head around as I heard the doorbell. I furrowed my eyebrows. Just who? Oh right. I live in a neighborhood, there are people living close. Right.

I left my working room and walked down the stairs. But as I turned to the right I felt my legs giving up and fell hard on the floor, knocking a vase of the table that fell on the floor and broke into pieces with a loud noise.

I looked at my legs. Unmoving. . I passed my hand through them and squeezed a bit. I could start feeling the pain on them. I forced them to work as I pulled myself up. There was no more noise outside, so I decided to go back to work.

As I reached the end of the house my footsteps came to a halt.

There was a person walking inside. A girl. A young one, younger than me surely. She was curiously looking around. Then her eyes stopped at my working room and I snapped out. She can’t find out what is in there, no one can...

“Who are you?” I called.

I almost regretted not announcing my arrival because of the scare I gave her. But she was the one who entered unannounced in the first place.

She started to rant on something but I could hear it since my vision started to get blur. I just told her to leave and turned around. Mistake, because my vision went black and I fell myself falling on the ground.

 

I hear a voice. I opened my eyes a little and found the girl from before right by me. She had a concerned look on her face and was asking me something. She was holding my medicine. How did she know I needed them?

Oh right, I told her…somehow I did.

She gave me too of them and held my head back so I could swallow. I did, and just a few seconds later I started to feel the numbness take over.

I looked at the girl one last time. She looked like she was about to cry?

Why should she cry? Are you crying for me miss? Why? Do you even know me?

Don’t cry. You just saved my life. I’m not going to die, so please don’t cry.

Thank you.

 

I opened my eyes again. It felt like an eternity since I was out. I looked around. Where am I?

Oh, the living room. How did I get here?

I felt the softness under me. Am I on the sofa? How?

The girl. Did she carry me here? With that small body? Or did I got here myself? Even more impossible, I was passed out.

My thoughts got interrupted when a delicious smell invaded my nostrils. Is it food? It’s been so long since I ate real food. Is this smell coming from my house?

I sat up with difficulty and looked at the kitchen.

There she was, the girl from before. She’s still in here. Why? Didn’t I tell her to leave? Am I being ungrateful? She saved my life back them. And now she’s even cooking… Maybe it’s for me? She was waiting for me? Am I allowed to think that there’s still somebody out there who’d care for me?

I’ll just allow myself that fantasy then.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I was finishing with the food when I looked up and jumped. The man from before was sitting on the couch and looking at me.

He still looked weak, and now he looked dazed.

I turned off to stove and went to him. He followed me with his eyes as I got close.

I kneeled down before him.

“Are you alright now?” I asked.

He only looked at me for a couple of seconds.

“Why…Why did you stay?” He asked out of blue, with a soft tone.

I blinked.

“Because…you didn’t seem well? What if you needed help again? I couldn’t just leave.” I answered.

He nodded. Then he looked at me again and I found myself looking back at his eyes.

“Thank you.” He said and gave me the smallest of the smiles, but full of sincerity.

I stared at him. This person is weird. I don’t go smiling to strangers…but I did save his life I guess… but…well, I guess this whole situation is as odd as it can be.

“It’s nothing.” I decided to reply since the awkward silence had been going for too long already.

I smiled back at him.

“I made you food, you look like you could use some.” I said gesturing at his body.

He furrowed his eyebrows, and then smiled again.

“You made me food?” He asked.

I only nodded, dumbfounded at his beautiful smile. This time his smile was bigger than before, showing me a set of perfect teeth and two deep dimples.

“…I’ll go get it.” I said in a daze and only heard him hum.

I set the food in a plate and searched around for a spoon and a pair of chopsticks and went back to the living room.

“Here you are.” I said and I handed him the plate and the eating utensils.

He stared at the plate for a while and breathed deeply. I got another scare when I noticed tears falling from his eyes.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry! Do you not like this? Does it smell bad?” I asked quickly.

He shook his head. He wiped his eyes.

“I’m sorry. That’s not it. It’s just that… I haven’t had homemade food in almost a decade, nor I had someone to make something like this for me.” He said softly.

My eyes softened. I sat on the floor and only watched as he ate earnestly.

This person seems so lonely. No. He’s lonely for sure. I really wonder why. He looks so sweet and gentle, yet so distant, like he’s lived and seen too much despite his young appearance.

He finished eating really quickly, making me chuckle as I watch him staring at his plate like he’s wondering who ate his food.

“Do you want seconds?” I asked amused.

He looked at me and smiled sheepishly.

“I want.” He said, but he put his plate on the table. “But not now. If I eat we can’t talk.” He said.

I nodded, a bit nervous.

“Right…” Was all I said.

He breathed deeply.

“So, who are you?” He asked, but in a more polite tone than before when he asked the same question.

“My name is Youngji. I… your grandmother is now residing at the place I work, and… this will sound really weird but… she told me I should come here because you needed me. She said I need to help you somehow.” I finished.

He looked at me blankly.

“My grandmother?” He asked unsure.

I nodded. He nodded too but stayed silent, like he lost himself in his thoughts.

“Hum, what is your name?” I asked, hoping to gain his attention again.

He looked back at me.

“Oh, my name is Hongbin.” He answered and offered a small smile.

“It’s a nice name.” I said and smiled.

He smiled fully this time.

“Thanks” He answered. “Well, okay, so my grandmother told you to come here and help me, right? Help with what, exactly?” He asked me.

I shrugged my shoulders.

“That’s for me to ask.” I said. “But, you’re sick, right? The pills I gave you earlier, what are they?” I asked.

Hongbin his breathe and bit his lip. I regretted asking. I was about to apologize for being so nosy but he spoke first.

“Those…are for my heart.” He spoke hesitantly.

I nodded and didn’t ask more.

“Perhaps, that’s why your grandmother told me to come here? So I could take care of you? From what I’ve seen today, it’s very dangerous for you to be alone all the time.” I said.

Hongbin tilted his head to the side.

“Take care of me?” He asked.

I nodded earnestly.

He stared at me for a few seconds. And then a sweet smile brightened up his features.

“You want to take care of me? Really?” He asked again.

I nodded and stood up.

“Yes, I will. So, I work every week day, so I’ll only come when I’m finished, but on the weekends I’ll come earlier so I can fix you breakfast, how about that?” I asked happily.

Hongbin only stared at me with a gaping mouth. My smile faded away.

“Oh my god I’m so sorry, I am just planning everything by myself and you haven’t even agreed. I…” I started blabbing but Hongbin stood up suddenly and stopped me.

I was completely stunned because all of sudden I found myself in his embrace, with his nose in my hair.

“Thank you. It’s very sweet of you. I… if it’s not much trouble… I’ll accept your help. Please…please help me.” He mumbled.

I relaxed. Why do I have this feeling that he’s not only referring to his heart condition? This person needs more than medical help. He needs love. Yes, that’s what he needs. He obviously has not interacted with anyone in years, maybe all he needs is company. Someone to care for him and someone he can care for.

 I…

Want to help him. Am I insane now too? I don’t even know this person, but I want to stay with him, I want to care for him. And I…I want to love him. Love him all he deserves to be loved. Can I do it?

I curled my arms around his waist and felt him a breathe. I caressed his back gently.

“Don’t worry. I’ll save you.” I whispered.

Maybe I really am insane.