Dear Ji,

You did it. You finally did it.

After years of denying your relationship, you finally decided to show everybody that it's her. 

It's always been her.

I thought when you first asked me to help you hide your relationship, you'd finally noticed me.

Me, who has fallen for you since I first saw you.

Me, who thought you were a bright star that shone brighter than your friends.

Me, who thought I shouldn't be thinking of you that way because you were younger than me.

The first time you asked me to be your girlfriend, I was ecstatic.

I thought maybe you felt the same way I do. It was not a one-sided love like what I originally thought it was.

But then you said, it was just pretend. 

And just when I felt like I was on top of the world, those words slammed be back down to earth.

You gave me clothes and accessories that match yours so they will think that we were THE couple.

You said you don't want people to hate her. That's why you thought of this scheme. You don't want her to get nasty comments on her SNS and other social media.

But you never thought about how they were gonna feel about me.

I was happy when some of them think we look cute wearing the same stuff.

But it hurt when some of them said I was not good enough for you.

I was willing to take the hate for you.

I was willing to pretend that your smiles were because of me.

I thought that maybe if I was with you, even if it's just for show, you'd realize how much you mean to me.

There were even times when you were such a great actor, I actually thought that maybe you did feel something me.

That maybe you can finally see the real me.

But you don't see me. 

You only have eyes for her.

And it hurts. I wanted it so badly it hurts.

I wanted you to just once, just one time, to look at me like you look at her.

Just for a moment, I want to be the center of your world.

If I had known this charade would end this soon, I would've shown you my love more.

I held back because I didn't want it to be awkward between us.

You've never seen me as more than a friend.

I will treasure all those times you were by my side.

Even if it was just to throw the others off your scent.

Those were the happiest moments of my life.

Now that you've finally come clean with her. I guess it's time for me to bow out.

I should be content just being your friend next to you.

But I don't think I can pretend anymore. 

I don't think I'll be able to see you happy with her without it killing me.

It was ok when we were pretending because me and everyone else thought we were real. 

But now they know the truth.

I wish you and her the best of luck.

I hope she'll realize how lucky she is to have you.

I hope she loves you as much or even more than I do.

You might wonder why I'm leaving, but then again, you might not even care.

I have to go so I can get over you. Maybe I can move on.

Being near you makes my heart yearn for things that were never meant to be.

So for the last time, thank you.

Thank you for letting me have the chance to be your pretend girl.

For a short time, I was able to imagine what it was like to be adored by you.

For a short while, I was able to show you my love for you without you realizing it was real for me but it was a show for you.

Thank you for letting me love you.

Goodbye.