He didn’t mean for this to happen. He didn’t mean for any of this to happen. All he wanted was to have fun. Not this. Not this at all.

It happened a few days ago. He and his friends were planning a party which involved drinking, alcohol, drugs. It was fun at first. Yeah, it was really fun.

But then it was the car ride. Lights were everywhere. Sounds distracted them. The place was crowded. But the crash was clear.

Taehyung survived. He survived but at what cost? He broke almost every single bone in his body. He can’t move a single finger. He can’t speak because the pain was unbearable.

His friends didn’t make it. There were six of them, including Taehyung, all together in the car. Out of the six, only Taehyung survived.

“You shouldn’t blame yourself.”

He shared a hospital room with another patient, Park Jimin. The two were the same age but Jimin was a lot smaller in height and weight. He was a sweet boy, always there to talk with Taehyung whenever he needed the comfort.

“I know it’s upsetting and difficult to cope but they’re in a better place now.” Jimin reassured Taehyung one night when he had woken up from the sobs. “Think of them up in heaven, with angel wings and looking down at you. They’ll laugh if they see you cry.”

Jimin had been a patient for several years already. He’s been diagnosed with leukemia and yet he wakes up every day with a smile within the forever familiar room.

“You’ll get better.”

Taehyung had gotten along with the other boy. Because he’s been here ever since he could remember, Jimin loved to listen to Taehyung speak of the outside world where the sun shone brightly and how the city spoke with noises of cars and people. 

And when Taehyung was able to sit up on his bed and move around in a wheelchair, Jimin would be the one to wheel him around. Jimin showed Taehyung the vegetable garden from behind the hospital and the therapy dogs downstairs on the main floor. They bonded quite closely and Taehyung takes a liking to the other.

“When you get better,” Taehyung had started as he bit into his breakfast bread given from the nurse, “I’ll take you to the best bakery in town.” Jimin had only smiled and Taehyung continued to speak. “Do you want some of my breakfast? I’ve never seen you eat.”

Jimin laughed and Taehyung felt warmed by it. “Thanks but I’m not hungry,” The smaller boy replied with a hint of sudden sadness in the voice. He looks to the IV drip bag that is connected to several parts of his body and then back at Taehyung. “Maybe you can offer me some honey buns when I get out of here. They’re my favorite.”

They both smiled and though no one said anything, they knew it was a promise. A promise that Taehyung will buy Jimin honey buns once they both get out.

Months passed and Taehyung had been upgraded to crutches. It was a strange feeling but Jimin was there to hold on to him, to tell Taehyung that he could do it.

“When you’re discharged, you’ll probably forget about me.” Jimin had said with a laugh when the two of them were in the back garden. Jimin meant it to be funny but Taehyung didn’t take the joke.

“You’ll get better, Jimin.” Taehyung told him. “When I get discharged, I’ll always come visit you. I won’t forget you, I promise.”

Taehyung didn’t understand why Jimin laughed. He was being honest. He will come back to visit Jimin. He won’t forget about Jimin. No, he won’t.

“Come on; let’s go get something to eat. I’m hungry.” Jimin changed the subject and tossed Taehyung his silver crutches and helped him up.

And then the following night came. Taehyung had trouble sleeping but he was able to hear the very heavy breathing from the other boy in the room. The heavy breathing turned into heavy movements and the heavy movements turned into heavy shouts.

All Taehyung would remember were the familiar lights blinding his eyes, the people running around in panic and the crying and the confusion.

When everyone hurried out the room, Jimin wasn’t there and Taehyung was alone.

The following morning was just as unpleasant as the previous night. Taehyung woke up with Jimin still not in his bed. He was worried, but he couldn’t do anything.

He wanted to find Jimin and ask him if everything is alright, if he’s going to be alright. And then when Taehyung had come back into his room, there Jimin was, sitting on his bed with a cup of water in his palms.

Taehyung could tell that Jimin was tired. The dark eye bags under his eyes were obvious but Jimin still smiled through it. Taehyung resisted asking about everything.

“Hey,” Jimin’s voice broke the silence. He smiled. “It’s a nice day today.”

“Uh…yeah it is.” Taehyung agreed, feeling if that’s the only thing he could do now.” He placed his crutches against his bed and stared around the room, avoiding eye contact.

Jimin’s voice was heard again. “Do you want to go to the garden?” He asked. “You know, to get some fresh air?”

“Uh, yeah, sure…”

Taehyung watched as Jimin slowly slid out of bed. He clearly looked thinner than before as if his bones were about to pop out by a single touch.

Molly, Jimin’s personal therapy dog, followed the two outside, her tail happily wagging against Jimin’s thin ankle. She continued to stay by his side like glue and whimpered when she had to be returned to the pets’ room since none of the animals were allowed inside the patients’ rooms.

“Are you feeling better?” Taehyung dared to ask as he placed a freshly washed patch of fruits on the table. He looked at Jimin who only smiled.

“You’re out of your crutches.” Instead Jimin asked. He continued to smile at Taehyung and fed him a piece of watermelon. “You must be glad.”

It was difficult for Taehyung to swallow the watermelon. “Yeah, doctor said I should be out in a few weeks.”

Jimin smiled. “I’m glad.” He said. “I don’t want you to keep yourself stuck in here instead of seeing your friends in school or your relatives again. I’m not really the best person to talk with.”

“No, you are.” Taehyung said. “You’re amazing, Jimin. You need to know that. You’re amazing to talk to, you’re funny, you’re adorable…you’re perfect.”

“Taehyung, you don’t understand.”

“What do I have to understand? You’re going to get better Jimin. I know you’ll get better and you have to believe that too.”

“Taehyung…” Jimin’s voice was still in denial.

“Why don’t you get it? You’re going to get better!”

“You don’t believe that…”

“I do and clearly I do more than you otherwise you would stop self-proclaiming of dying.” Taehyung remarks in anger. He glared at the smaller boy and slammed his palms onto the table before raging out the door.

Taehyung didn’t talk to Jimin after that. He ignored the apologies, the comforts and the sobs. And when it was time for Taehyung’s discharge, Jimin wasn’t in his room.

He wanted to say one last word to Jimin. To tell him that he shouldn’t have raged at that dark time. To tell him that once they get discharged, regardless of time, they’ll meet again and Taehyung will buy Jimin the honey buns he promised.

But then there Jimin was, out in the garden with Molly by his side. He was alone.

“Hey,” Taehyung called out, almost startling the other. Jimin looked up and saw Taehyung out of his hospital attire. Instead of the old, plain, blue outfit, Taehyung had on his skinny jeans, a black shirt and a leather jacket. “Hey,” Taehyung called again, breaking into a smile. “I wanted to say…goodbye.” The words just blurted out his mouth and he wanted to take it back.

But Jimin smiled. It was sincere. Jimin was always sincere. “I’ll miss you.” He sincerely said and only shrugged. “The room’s going to be lonely without you.”

“I’ll miss you too.” Taehyung lowly said. “Uh, here, I bought this for you.” He held up a bag and Jimin hesitantly accepted it. It was a doll. “I thought it sort of looked like you. So…yeah…”

Jimin smiled. “Thank you. It’s adorable.” Taehyung smiled back and they stared at each other in silence. But it doesn’t last long as Taehyung’s phone rang with text messages from friends and family. “You should probably go now,” Jimin suggested. “I’m pretty sure you’re sort of sick on this place already.”

Taehyung bit the inside of his cheek. “I promise I’ll come back to visit you.”

Jimin smiled. “I’ll see you later.” He looked down to the dog panting next to his leg. “Come on Molly, let’s get something to eat.”

Just like that Jimin brushed passed Taehyung with a bittersweet smile. And just like that he disappeared through the doors.

Taehyung had kept his promise and visited Jimin with complimentary honey buns. And Jimin was fascinated by all the stories of Taehyung’s friends and trips and family and school.

“So then we pushed him into the pool but we didn’t know that he had his phone so yeah we actually broke it.” Taehyung had told Jimin who busted into smiles and laughs. It wasn’t that fun, but as long as Jimin is smiling, Taehyung is proud of himself.

But the visits became less and less. Jimin found himself talking more to his doll rather than any other human being. And Taehyung found himself getting into more and more parties and meeting new friends.

He’s gotten himself a girlfriend too. Yeah, she’s pretty. But there was a sudden feeling that made him empty. Yeah sure Irene was pretty but she wasn’t the one. No, she’s not the one. She wasn’t…Jimin. When was the last time Taehyung had visited him – a week, a month, two months, or three months?

He doesn’t know.

The hospital doors were so unfamiliar to Taehyung. As if he had never once passed through them. As if all the times of him being trapped in here had been a blur. As if he never met Jimin before.

He went up the stairs with heavy steps – each step is a heavy heartbeat. Jimin’s room was right in the corner. Taehyung wondered what Jimin was doing behind the doors. Was he sleeping? Was he playing with the doll?

All his answers were behind the doors but once he opened them, his answers weren’t here. Jimin wasn’t here. The bed was empty. Nothing reminded Taehyung of Jimin. For a second he thought he had entered the wrong room. But no, he didn.t He knew it was the right room once he saw the doll sitting on the white chair near the bed. 

Taehyung slowly walked towards it. He picked up the doll and squeezed it. There was a note but Taehyung doesn’t pay attention with it. He continued to stare at the doll. It looked so much like Jimin. It looked too much like him.

And without even realizing, there’s a single teardrop that falls down Taehyung’s cheek followed by another and another.

It took a while for Taehyung to pick up the note without dropping it by his shaky hands. He opens it.

To Taehyung,

            It’s been a while since I’ve seen or heard your name. When you promised that you’d never forget me and always come and visit, I thought the two of us were being delusional. But then you kept coming back and I was so glad for waking up every day. When we were still sharing a room, I’ve never smiled as much as I have after meeting you. You make me smile every day.

            And then you stopped. And I understand. You have so much in your life to look for. You don’t need to keep coming back and vising me out of pity. You need to live your life that you survived with. You have so much ahead of you.

            I don’t.

            Before I met you, every day I woke up saying to myself, ‘another day to die.’ I wanted to die so badly, to escape this pain of waking up every day that reminds me that I’m in pain. But then I met you. You taught me so much in just a few months. I’m glad I met you. I’m glad to smile again. And I’m glad I’m writing this before my time is up.

            Please don’t miss me, Taehyung. Don’t cry for me. But I want you to know that I still want to be with you, just not in front of you…or behind you…or next to you…uh let’s just say that I’ll be above you. Think of me as your little guardian angels. I’m not with you but…I’m with you. Hahaha, I’m weird~

            But yeah, my time is almost up, Taehyung. And my last words I want to say to you…don’t ever give up on your life. You’re amazing Taehyung. You make people laugh with your weird 4D personality. You make people smile with your little puppy smile. You make me smile.

            Goodbye Taehyung. Thank you for everything…especially the doll.

From,

Jimin

P.S   

Honey buns~

Taehyung didn’t bother wiping the tears that poured down his face. Each tear was like it represent Jimin’s smile disappearing. He wanted to deny this. He wanted to deny everything. He didn’t mean for this to happen. He didn’t mean for any of this to happen. All he wanted was to have fun. Not this. Not this at all.

But it’s happened. Jimin is gone. He’s really gone. No more of his laugh. No more of his smile. He’s gone.

“Don’t cry.”

Taehyung swallows and finally wipes the salty tears. “I won’t, Jimin. I won’t.”

“Good.”

My first official Vmin fanfic :D

Hope you enjoyed it!

Please leave lots of comments 

and upvote this story

thank you!~