When Baekhyun woke up, he wondered why his bed was so cold. And hard. Then he opened his eyes. He's on a porch. In the middle of the night. In a city that he doesn't know. Holy . 

~

"Joonmyun-hyung! I'm on a porch and it's night and it's dark and cold and I don't know where I-" Baekhyun stopped suddenly, realizing that the normally frantic and talkative leader was now silent. "Hyung?" 

"Leader is not feeling well right now, he can't talk, I'm also in a ing mansion." 

"Luhan hyung?" Baekhyun asked, utterly confused. "Wait, why can't Joonmyun-hyung talk?" 

He received a noncommital grunt in answer. "I don't know. I mean, he's in a maid's costume or something and I'm wearing stuff that's expensive. I'm in a mansion. I'm also kind of confused right now." 

Baekhyun frowned, wondering if maybe this was a hidden camera or a very sick sasaeng. He shuddered at the thought. "Well get me back to Korea!" 

"I can't!" Luhan insisted. "I don't know what's happening! I'm eating dinner alone, Joonmyun can't talk, I turned rich overnight." 

Baekhyun sighed. Luhan was no help. He would have to call someone else to understand what was happening. Maybe one member was in on the hidden camera. He called the next person on his contact list - Chanyeol. 

"Where are you?" he asked. 

"Uh," Chanyeol replied. "I don't know. I'm in a car. But I don't remember anything about buying or driving it?" 

"I'm on some porch," Baekhyun kicked at the steps in frustration. "What the is going on?" 

"I don't know," Chanyeol said. "I called Kris and he said that he was beating some kid up?" 

"Joonmyun-hyung is a mute maid and Luhan-hyung is eating dinner alone in a mansion," Baekhyun informed. 

"Is this a secret camera?" Chanyeol asked. 

"I don't know, Chanyeol, I-" Baekhyun stopped. "Let's get all the members together on one giant grou pchat. That way we can figure out where everyone is." 

He took a few minutes to set up the group chat, which took longer than usual. WHerever he was, the signal was terrible. As soon as all twelve of them were connected, the static-y audio came on. 

"I'm in a mansion!" Luhan screamed. 

"Walking down the street with Jongin?" Tao said. The rest of the members started rattling off locations and theories, Baekhyun took a deep breath, screaming into the microphone. "Guys!" 

They fell silent. "What?"  Minseok replied. 

"I think I know what this is," Tao said slowly. 

"What is your theory, Tao, in irritated voice," Luhan said. "Well, that's what Joonmyun wrote."

"Wrote?" Kris repeated, confused. 

"He's mute," Baekhyun explained, wanting to move past the fact. "Tao, what the is happening?" 

"It's the Heirs." 

All was silent. 

"You are ing kidding me." 

"I'm not!" Tao protested. "Listen, it makes sense. Joonmyun-hyung is a mute maid, Eunsang's mom, he's serving Luhan-gege dinner, just like in the Heirs! Luhan-ge is Han Ki-ae. Me and Jongin are walking down a street in Korea, we must be some characters. Kris is beating a guy up, like Choi Youngdo. He even has the eyebrows for it!" 

"What's wrong with my eyebrows?" Kris asked, offended. 

"Nothing," Tao quickly added. "Point is, where is everyone?" 

"I'm in a car," Chanyeol said. 

"A penthouse?" Jongdae told them. "There's clothes everywhere." 

"I'm on a porch in some foreign place and it's night and I'm cold, so hurry up with your theory, Tao," Baekhyun growled. There was no way that they were in the middel of the Heirs. It was impossible. It was a hidden camera, and Tao was in on it, Baekhyun knew it. 

"Whatever," Tao scoffed. "Well, Jongdae-hyung's obviously Rachel, no one else in the drama cares about clothes." 

"Why am I a girl?" Jongdae whined. 

"There is your proof right there," Tao explained. "I don't know, I think that Chanyeol might be Kim Tan." 

"Yes!" Chanyeol cheered. "I'm the male lead!" 

"Wait a second," Baekhyun's stomach dropped. "Does that mean?" He made a face. "I can't be!" 

"I'm sorry, hyung, it's true," Tao apologized. Baekhyun let out a strangled sort of sound in horror. 

"What is he? Joonmyun asks," Luhan told them. 

"I'm- I'm Cha Eunsang," Baekhyun whispered. "Are you sure there isn't any other role that involves sitting on the porch." 

"Yeah, well, it makes sense then that Chanyeol's Kim Tan because-" Tao started

"I am manly!" Chanyeol interrupted, coughing loudly. 

"What?" Baekhyun blinked. 

"So now what?" Minseok asked. "How do we get home?" 

"We have to act out the dramas," Tao deadpanned. 

There was the sound of someone spitting out water and choking, and then someone thumping the other person's back. A few seconds later, Luhan rasped "What?" 

"But there's no group of-" Baekhyun started, but then heard loud rowdy laughter. "Nevermind." 

"It's starting!" Tao squealed, and Kyungsoo sighed deeply. 

"I am surrounded by idiots." 

"Shut up and drive here, giant!" Baekhyun hissed. "I ain't acting as some flowery princess. The sooner we get out the better." 

"Right," Chanyeol replied, determined, but then hesitated. "Uh, where are you?" 

Kyungsoo sighed again. "Idiots, all idiots." 

"I don't know," Baekhyun grit out. "I don't read American. Just drive around until you find me. You can follow the stench of alcohol," he wrinkled his nose at the group of rambunctous men. 

"I think they picked the wrong person for the lead role," Luhan started. "I should've been the lead role, I'm manlier." 

"It should've been Jongin," Sehun said. "It's Kim Tan, not Kim Sparkling Vampire Deer or whatever the you are." 

"Chanyeol," Baekhyun was shouting over the noise of the men, "Hurry up!" 

"Uh, Baekhyun, you might not wanna get too close to them," Kris said. "They're saying-" 

"I found the right street!" Chanyeol announced. "Coming, Baekhyunnie!" 

"ing finally," Baekhyun breathed. "I want you to know that if I have vocal problems because of their bad breath-"

"How do you get vocal problems from their bad breath?" Minseok asked. 

"Your nose is connected to your throat, duh," Baekhyun answered as if it was obvious. Their concert was tonight and there was no way he was going to miss it because some stupid giant couldn't find his way onto a street. "Serously, Chanyeol, what kind of a male lead are you? It's been like five minutes since you said you found the right street." 

"What if we don't act out the dramas correctly?" Luhan asked in horror. "What if we're stuck like this forever? What if I have to play some rich for the rest of my life?" 

"You're right," Tao agreed. "Joonmyun-hyung should be the rich ." 

"Ah," Baekhyun mused. It made sense. He wrinkled his nose when one of the men vomitted on the front lawn of whoever's porch he was sitting on. This was why he didn't drink. 

"Um," he continued, "Are they supposed to get this close?" he swatted away a hand that touched his thigh. 

"Well, no," Tao thought. "I guess they've got extra time." 

"I'm here!" Chanyeol panted as he ran up the sidewalk. 

"Why didn't you take the ing car?" Baekhyun growled. "I swear none of these guys have touched a toothbrush in their lives." 

"Oh, do I have to beat them up?" Chanyeol asked, leaning his hands on his knees and panting after every word. "And the car ran out of gas." 

"Well it's a little late to do what happened in the actual drama," Tao explained, annoyed, "So yeah, you have to beat them up and be manly and stuff, you know, like save Cha Byunsang from getting assaulted-" 

"I'm not getting assaulted!" Baekhyun argued, glossing over his new name. "I could beat all of these guys with my hands tied behind my back!" 

"That's not how it goes," Tao whined. "Just let the knight in shining armor do his work so we can all go home." 

Baekhyun sighed, settling himself for leaning back and waiting for the idiot in shining armor to come pick him up so they could go to their concert - he practiced his solo hard for that concert and he wasn't going to let any group of drunk men keep him from performing even if they were twice his size (but then again most people were). 

"Hey," one of them said, slurring some words in English, draping an arm (messily) over the smaller's back. 

"I'm here," Chanyeol said, panting as he rounded the corner. He leaned his hands on his knees, catching his breath. "Just let me catch my breath for a sec, Baek, then I'll get on with the saving and all." 

Baekhyun flicked at the hands on his shoulder, annoyed at both of them. 

"Okay," he finished, standing up tall and puffing his chest. "Unhand the fair maiden!" 

"Fair maiden?!" Baekhyun screeched, standing up suddenly and throwing the drunkard off in the process. He grumbled a few words before remaining lying down on the porch as the fiery main vocalist marched off the porch. 

"Wait," one of the men said, grabbing his wrist. 

Baekhyun narrowed his eyes, "Let. Go." 

"But-" 

~ 

"Cha Eunsang is not supposed to beat up a group of grown men to get through them in order to beat up another grown man," Tao grit through his teeth. 

Baekhyun shrugged. "No comment." 

~

"OH MY GOD GUYS I'M IN AMERICA!" 

"Ow," Jongin complained. "That hurt, quiet the down Jongdae." 

"Sorry not sorry," he replied, looking around. A few other people gave him strange looks as they passed. He paid them no mind, dragging his suitcase over to a bench and settling down. 

"Wait, did the roles change or something?" Luhan asked. "Is it Chen Eunsang now?" 

Jongdae shuddered. " no. I'll just mess up the scene so we can go back home." 

"You can't!" Tao shrieked, causing the vocalist to flinch and drop his phone at the high pitched frequency. 

"Okay, I get it," he replied. "So who am I?" 

"Well, I don't think it's Chen Eunsang yet," Baekhyun said. "Seeing as me and the tall one are still in the car and not magically transported somewhere else." 

"Must be another scene then," Kris reasoned. "Well maybe he's Rachel and he's supposed to meet Eunsang at the airport or something." 

Jongdae furrowed his eyebrows. "Wait a second - how do you know that?" 

Kris coughed. "I only watched the first episode, okay?"

"Right," Jongdae shot up from his seat, "I'll find Eunsang, we do the scene and we go home in time for our concert. There, done!" he clapped his hands, dropping the phone in the process. Gasping, he dived for it, only to have it kicked away with the flow of feet. He crawled through their legs, maneuvering through the sea of people in order to get it. 

"Finally!" he snatched it up, holding it in the air. 

"No!" he cried as it caught on a man's coat, falling into the purse of the woman next to him. Jongdae scrambled to his feet, hastily following her. He pushed a businessman aside, ignoring the glare sent his way as he followed the pink purse onto the escalator. Looking around him to make sure no one was looking, he ped her bag quietly, digging around for her cellphone. 

It wasn't in the first pocket, which was her own cellphone and a pen and pad. Jongdae tried the middle. He found a compact mirror and opened it, checking his reflection. He swept his bangs to the side. There. Perfect, as always. The last pocket had his cellphone, which he grabbed in victory. He also saw some portable foundation, frowning. "That does not match your skin tone." There was also some mascara and eyeliner. Didn't Baekhyun use this brand? He-

"Thief!" the woman screamed, pointing at him. 

"No, no," Jongdae tried to explain, waving his hands. "I was getting my phone, see?" 

"Thief! Thief!" she ran ahead, spotting a security guard at the top of the escalator. Jongdae gasped, running after her to explain before she reported him to the security. 

"Cellphone!" he screamed at her. 

~

"One scene is all I ask for, you guys, one scene." 

~

"Kris, you can't beat a guy up," Minseok explained. "It's wrong!" 

"Well if he does it we can go home," Sehun reasoned. 

"Relax, guys, I've got this. Besides, I'm not the one beating him up. My goons are." 

"Did you seriously just use the word goons?" 

"Er, yes," Kris hesitated. 

"You're a horrible Choi Young Do," Tao told him. 

"I've got the eyebrows though," Kris said. 

"That is true," Kyungsoo agreed. 

"Joonmyun says that he wants you to mess up the scene so the roles can be changed and he can talk again," Luhan read off. "I suggest you don't because the roles don't change, the scene does. And also, if he's gonna panic at least do it quietly." 

"I've got this guys," Kris assured, standing up. 

~

"He was right ing in front of you and you missed." 

"It's not easy!" 

~

"Please, I beg you hyung, get the scene right this time," Jongin whimpered. "Pretending to date him is-"

"Chanyoung, look at this!" Tao grabbed him by the arm, dragging him away. 

"Save me!" 

~
"I think Tao makes a good Bona," Baekhyun picked at his nails. 

~

"Sehun?" Tao asked. "What are you?" 

"I'm reading the script." 

"Are you Yoon Ha Rim?" Tao asked. 

"No," the maknae answered. 

"What are you doing, Yixing? Joonmyun asks," Luhan says. "He wants to know what your role is since he trust you apparently." 

"Well-"

"Are you eating right now?" Sehun asked. 

"Maybe." 

"I thought her sister was supposed to be poor though?" Jongin said. "Isn't her entire family supposed to be poor?"

~

"You can't just be Kim Heechul!" 

"Calm, down, Min-"

"Calm down? Calm down?! I can't, do you understand who Kim Heechul is?" 

"Yes, but-"

"You can't just be him whenever you feel like it!" 

"Okay, I get it!" 

~

"Guys, please, just don't mess up the scene this time," Tao told them. 

"We won't," Joonmyun assured. "Now that I finally got my voice back." 

"Minseok hyung says that you can't just-"

"Yes, yes, Baek, we get it. Now enjoy your dinner in the mansion," Luhan dismissed. He turned back, squaring his shoulders. "Let's do this." For Exo's concert. For Exo's fans. For Exo. 

"EXO SARANGHAJA!" he shouted across the rooftops. 

"The Luhan, you're just acting out a scene from a drama." 

"For Exo's concert," he defended, sniffing. 

"Get on with it," Jongin told them. "Please, just-" 

"Chanyoung! Come on!" 

For Jongin. For Jongin's sanity. For Jongin's wallet. 

~

"My face is not that funny says Joonmyun hyung," Baekhyun recited. 

"This is our last role switch guys, I'm pretty sure the universe got maxed out by us," Sehun deadpanned. 

"Right," Luhan said. 

"You gotta be man, Lu," Kris said. "Be a man." 

"What about me?" Tao asked, bouncing on the balls of his feet. 

"You just be quiet since that's all you're supposed to do anyway," the leader told him. 

"Fine," Tao huffed, settling down again and crossing his arms. Luhan rolled his eyes at their antics. 

"Okay, 3, 2, 1, action!" Kris called. 

Luhan looked up at Tao. "Do I . . . like you?" 

~

"What am I then?" Kyungsoo asked. 

"Where are you?" Baekhyun questioned. 

"In a recording studio."

"Well what song are you recording?" Tao asked. 

"It says . . . In the Name of Love," Kyungsoo answered. "What?" 

"Wait a second," he realized, looking at the logo and sign on the wall. "Jellyfish Entertainment?" 

"The OST! You're recording an OST!" Chanyeol screamed. Kyungsoo held the phone away from his ear at the loud noise. 

"Sorry," he apologized. "I got excited." 

"It happens sometimes," Sehun assured him. 

"Well hurry up and sing the song!" Baekhyun said. "Finally we'll be able to go back home. 

"Fine," Kyungsoo grumbled. 

~

"What were you Sehun?" Jongdae asked backstage. "I mean, I was Rachel and all."

He shrugged. "I don't know. I was in an office. With a script and all." 

"Wait," Tao paused. "You weren't Yoon Ha Rim by chance were you?" 

"I told you already that I wasn't," Sehun scowled. "I just know that I was the director." 

"Yoon Ha Rim is the director!" 

"Now you tell us you were the director!" 

~

Joonmyun was happy to wake up in a warm and soft bed. He smiled and snuggled deeper into the blanket. Wait a second. He sat up, looking around. An old Korean house with wooden floorboards, swords stacked to the side, and two other men sleeping on bed rolls next to him. The door was suddenly smashed open and a dagger thrown at the body of the man next to him. 

"You're kidding me," he deadpanned. "You're ing kidding me."

Word Count: 2. 8 k 

ROLES

Xiumin - Heechul, Kim Tan's mother in later scenes
Luhan - Kim Tan's mother, Kim Tan in later scenes
Suho - Eunsang's mom, Eunsang in later scene
Kris - Choi Young Do
Lay - Euneok (Stella) Eunsang's older sister
Baekhyun - Cha Eunsang, Kim Tan's mother in later scenes
Chanyeol - Kim Tan, other minor character while Luhan is Kim Tan
Chen - Rachel Yoo
DO - VIXX Ken (OST)
Tao - Lee Bona, Cha Eunsang in later scene
Kai - Chanyoung (Bona's boyfriend)
Sehun - Yoon Ha Rim (director) 

a/n: IT'S NOT DONE YET  each chapter is a different drama. see if you can guess what the next drama is ^^