I backed up towards a wall and let myself sink to the floor. I clutched the picture of us close to my chest and let it crumple within my fingers. The tears flooded my eyes and as each one reached my cheek a new realisation hit. Every time we had been together he had never called my name, he had never looked me in the eyes. Every time he had slipped into my bedroom he reeked of alcohol and whenever I had gotten a text begging me to come over, he had only wanted one thing.

            Junhyung brought his hands up to his face trying to block the tears by shutting his eyes but they still flowed. Out from beneath his lids, landing on his trembling hands. A knock sounded from the opposite side of the door and he clamped both hands over his mouth attempting to silence his shaky cries.

            “Yah! Junhyung I left my game in the room, open upppp ppalli ppalli” it was surely Doojoon; he continued to slam on the door causing vibrations to travel throughout Junhyung’s body. It only made keeping under control more difficult and Junhyung leaped up before he completely broke down on the other side of the door.

            “Alright, ill bring it to you in the living room just give me 5 minutes,” His voice was uneven but it was barely a whisper so Doojoon didn’t notice. The knocking finally stopped and Junhyung managed to use the momentary distraction to stop the water that seemed to continuously seep from his eyes. He looked everywhere in the room until he finally discovered Doojoon’s game tucked under his own pillow.

            He walked to where Doojoon was lying down on Dongwoon’s lap and tossed the game onto his stomach. “I’m going out for a walk,” Yoseob wasn’t home so he wanted the chance to clear his head. “It’s almost dark out- why are your eyes so red?” Doojoon had gotten up from where he was laying down, finally realising that something was wrong and reached out to touch Junhyung’s face.

            “Aish, nothing I’m just tired. Ill be back soon but just in case leave the door open, I couldn’t find my key” He had slapped Doojoon’s hand away before it had reached his cheek and the older member stood there pouting. “Okay but make sure no one recognizes you”.

            Yoseob was finishing his last schedule for the day and sighed loudly as he walked towards his manager. “I’m hungry hyung, you?” His manager shook his head and smiled, “I already got you some food, it’s in the back” “Wahhh~ thank you hyung” Yoseob bowed deeply pretending to cry from tears of joy before jumping into the back seat and grabbing the food.

The drive back home was long and boring without the other members there to accompany him. He was exhausted but wasn’t able to fall asleep and sat quietly while staring out the window. He watched the trees and lights blend together outside as the car picked up speed. His fi