The day Luhan left was the day Baekhyun’s life turned upside down.

Now, it wasn’t that Baekhyun harbored romantic feelings for Luhan. Far from it. He just hated seeing his employees leaving. Especially ones as integral to his life as Luhan. And Baekhyun, being…well, Baekhyun knew only one way to show his love: through insults.

“ YOU KIM MINSEOK!” Baekhyun screamed from his office, shaking his fist as he stared up at the office ceiling.

“But I’m right here.” Minseok whimpered as he helped Luhan pack the last of his items into a box.

Luhan simply hummed and patted his boyfriend’s back as he strode forward to the elevators.

“Bye Baek!” Luhan cheerfully called out from the elevators, and laughed as his goodbye was met with the sound of something – maybe glass, judging from the sound- shattering against a wall.

~~~

Byun Baekhyun, CEO of Byun Corp. was a smart man. Having graduated from the best university and receiving the best education possible, he was the obvious choice as CEO for the company.

Of course it also helped that he was the only heir to his father’s company.

Good looking, wealthy, a bright future. There was nothing more he could ask for.

Right?

“I want Luhan.” Said CEO pouted and crossed his arms across his chest as best friend and head of marketing, Kim Jongdae asked him if he wanted to come out for drinks.

And maybe look for a new secretary.

“He was the best! He knew everything, and now, he’s probably trapped in some mindless job slaving away in a hole somewhere, lost and helpless.” Baekhyun laments, hand clutching the fabric of his shirt, right above the heart.

“Or maybe he moved to Busan with his boyfriend and got a new job.” Jongdae deadpanned.

“SLAVING at a new job, Jongdae! SLAVING!” Baekhyun screamed.

“Obviously.” Jongdae retreated slowly, resolving to look into good mental hospitals to help out his ailing friend.

Jongdae is nothing if not a saint.

From: Baekhyun

To: Minseok (EEEEVIIIILLLL)

This is all your fault. YOU KIM MINSOEK!!!!!!!!!

Somewhere in Busan, Kim Minseok checked his phone, and proceeded to bury his head in his boyfriend’s neck. Hurt and confused.

~~~

“Lay.” Kyungsoo turned to his assistant. “Why is he here?”

The assistant turned to where Kyungsoo was pointing. “Um, because he is a guest at this party?”

“Well, .” Kyungsoo scowled at the man across the room who was oblivious to their presence. “And who is that?”

“That, I believe is his new assistant. Kim Jongin. Also, my name is Yixing, sir.” Yixing smiled, suppressing the exasperated sigh that threatened to bubble out.

“That’s not what your instagram says.” Kyungsoo ignored his assistant and continued staring daggers at the man across the room, who finally caught his eye and smirked back.

If Kyungsoo’s heart pounded faster, it was merely out of hate. Riiiight.

As the night continued, the party guests continued to mingle, Kyungsoo continued to stare at the offensive man across the room, and Yixing continued mulling over if his boss stalking following him on instagram was a good thing or a bad one. However, all train of thought was broken when suddenly Kyungsoo grabbed Yixing’s arm and hissed:

“Quick, act natural, he’s coming over.”

Yixing looked up to see said man coming over to their table, and offered him a smile.

Only to be ignored.

Rude.

“Kyungsoo.” The man said as he reached their table.

“Baekhyun.” Kyungsoo replied from his seat, seated in what he called a natural pose.

“Why is your foot in your dessert?”

Kyungsoo looked over to where his foot was resting casually in the chocolate cheesecake.

“I hear it makes for good shoe….polish.” Kyungsoo grinned, extracting one foot from the now ruined cheesecake and the other one from where it was resting in Yixing’s lap.

Right. Casual position.

“Uh – huh. Anyways, I was just talking to my assistant over here-” Baekhyun began before he got cut off by a sneering Kyungsoo.

“What happened to the deer? Got sick of working for you?”

“SHUT UP! WHY WOULD I EMPLOY A DEER IN MY OFFICES! THAT’S ANIMAL CRUELTY! WHY WOULD YOU EVEN SUGGEST THAT?!?!” Baekhyun screamed, putting on an exaggerated expression he was convinced conveyed his “horror” to the entire table. Which was by now listening intently to the two fighting CEOs.

“I – I NEVER!” Kyungsoo screeched back.

“Whatever! I bet you the only reason you became CEO was because your firm is called Athena; and you have Owl eyes.” Baekhyun mentally patted his own back for this clearly exceptional comeback. Yes Byun Baekhyun. Good job, Byun Baekhyun. This is why you graduated top of your class Byun Baekhyun.  

“Why, YOU!” Kyungsoo shook his fist at the retreating back of a very satisfied CEO. A little sad to see him go.

TOTALLY because he couldn’t insult him further. Right? Riiighhtt.

Yixing meanwhile, tapped away at his phone.

Can you believe I get paid to watch this?

And smiled at he reads the response:

IKR. Me either. Life = Heaven.

Across the room, sitting beside a cackling Kim Jongdae, Baekhyun pulls out his phone feeling extremely benevolent.

From: Baekhyun

To: Minseok (EEEEVIIIILLLL)

you Kim Minseok….hyung

Somewhere in Busan, Luhan cackled at his boyfriend’s bewildered expression.

~~~

To someone of a third party, not very well versed with the internal emotional labyrinth possessed by both Baekhyun and Kyungsoo, it might seem the two CEOs hate each other.

Well, they would be what we call in the real world ‘Doo-doo heads’. (scientific term: WRONG)

In fact, Baekhyun and Kyungsoo graduated from the same university. Baekhyun a year older than the other, but neither had ever really talked until they met at a gala dinner not two years ago. Having developed a mutual crush, the two had then decided (separately, of course) that crushing on the CEO of a rival company (“No matter how ING ADORABLE” Kyungsoo had declared) was not kosher, and thus decided to act like any rational human being and get over the crush.

By rudely bashing each other with insults and low blows. And staring at the other while they weren’t looking. Or simply stalking them online. Whichever worked. Until of course, it didn’t.

Luhan, being the residential snoop that he is, had opened Baekhyun’s laptop one fine afternoon, (curiosity piqued from that one time he had passed by the office and heard soft sobs) and discovered the Google images tab. Search: ‘Do Kyungsoo adorable’.

And Kyungsoo, well, his time was neigh.

~~~~~

“Um, excuse me, Mr. Boss, sir?” Jongin poked his head into Baekhyun’s office.

“What, slave?” Baekhyun looked up from his laptop where the current tab showed the Wikipedia page for a certain ‘Do Kyungsoo’.

Baekhyun was probably sure this behavior constituted as harassment towards his employees. But , who was complaining, right?

“Um, Mr. Jongdae told me to tell you that ‘the traitor’ is here to see you.”

Jongin, having worked for over a month now, with his eccentric boss was expecting a lot of things. What he wasn’t expecting however was a hug.

“Jongin. Dear.”

Jongin resisted the urge to scream like a girl and flail his arms. Though he was pretty sure the terror was evident on his face.

“Sir….?” Jongin subtly tried to remove Baekhyun’s arm from his shoulders, but HOLY was his boss strong.

“You’re the best secretary ever.” Baekhyun patted Jongin’s head and half – dragged, half – steered Jongin towards the reception.

By now, Jongin was switching between pinching himself and resisting the urge to puke and cry simultaneously.

He was sure he had done something wrong and now, Baekhyun would end him.

“Please, I’m sorry!” Jongin suddenly fell to his knees. “I – I’m just a poor university student! Have mercy! Whatever I did, I’m sorry! Don’t hurt me!”

“Um…. What?” Baekhyun frowned at Jongin, all the while attempting to shoot him a (what he hoped) reassuring smile. The resulting expression caused poor Jongin to cower even more. “Are you OK, slav- Jongin?”

“Why are you being so nice?!?” Jongin wailed, refusing to get up.

“Oh.” Came the reply. “Because my traitorous ex-secretary is here and I need to show him that we are happier without him!” Baekhyun declared before grabbing Jongin by the forearms and pulling him up. “So now, act all happy and sunshine-y and I won’t make you feed my cat.”

Jongin nodded and got up, following Baekhyun.

Who he was sure was allergic to fur.

~~~~~

“Still single, Byun Baekhyun?” Were the first words out of Luhan’s mouth as he saw his ex-boss.

“ you. Jongin and I are perfectly happy. Right, Jongin?” Baekhyun put an arm around his secretary’s shoulder, who was starting to get used to this scenario.

“Yup. Boss-man even gave me the ENTIRE next week off JUST so I could take some time off and just hang with my boyfriend.” Jongin smiled and nuzzled his head into Baekhyun’s shoulder.

“WHA- I mean, yes. Yes, I did. You go out there, and you have the time of your life with Sejung.”

“Sehun.” Jongin yelped as he felt fingers pinch his side.

“Awwwww, Baekhyunnie has gone soft without me!” Luhan grabbed Baekhyun’s cheeks and pulled.  Harshly.

Jongin watched in awe. “Can I pull your cheeks?” He asked.

“Go. Work. Now.” Baekhyun pointed towards the general direction of his office and Jongin scampered off.

“Why are you here, again?” Baekhyun asked.

“I have to finish moving the last of the furniture form mine and Minseok’s apartment to our new house in Busan. AND I have to terminate my apartment lease! So, since I was here anyways, I decided to stop by and brighten your day!” There was something creepy in Luhan’s smile.

“You can let go of my cheeks now.” Baekhyun grumbled.

“You er. Leave my boyfriend alone.” Luhan’s smile had somehow turned sinister. “Only when you delete his number will I let go of your cheeks.”

Baekhyun hastily pulled out his phone and tapped away, then showed his screen to Luhan as he pressed ‘OK’ to “Delete contact?”

“Good job!” Luhan cooed, letting go of a shaken Baekhyun and patting his head. “Now tell me of your progress with a certain CEO.”

Somewhere in Busan, Minseok received a message. He smiled as he read it, relief coursing through his veins.

you Kim Minseok. This was a low blow.

~~~~

Kyungsoo had a rule. None shall visit his office nearing noon. None.

That was time Kyungsoo had allotted for playing solitaire. Or staring at pictures of Byun Baekhyun. Mostly worshipping staring at pictures of Byun Baekhyun.

“So infuriating. Yet so beautiful.” Kyungsoo stared into his computer screen.

“So, Byun Baekhyun, huh? When are you planning on asking him out?”

“Kris.” Kyungsoo quickly closed the tab and pretended to be staring at his laptop, immersed in a riveting game of solitaire.

A CEO’s work is simply never done.

“Kyungsoo.” Kris aka Satan, smirked from the door.

“Get the out of my office.”

“.”

“Bye.” Kyungsoo mentally cheered as fireworks exploded across his screen.

yes.

~~~

“He has a cute mouth.” Baekhyun glared at Luhan and pursed his lips. “That’s’ all.”

“I’m sure you like more things about him, Baekhyun.” Luhan prompted, feeling like a therapist. He was right. But was Baekhyun going to admit that to the traitor? Nooooo, because that would be sacrilegious.

Meanwhile, a quick search provided Luhan with glasses that he quickly put on, humming in satisfaction.

“You’re an idiot. He would probably agree.” Baekhyun spoke up from his chair, definitely not thinking about Kyungsoo’s mouth. Nope.

“Meanie.” Luhan stuck his tongue out at Baekhyun before snapping a selca and sending it to Minseok with a caption

Baekhyunnie’s being mean to meeeee  .·´¯`(>▂<)´¯`·.

Somewhere in Busan, Minseok contemplated throwing out his phone.

~~~

“LUHAN!” Jongdae screamed as he pulled the traitorous ex-secretary into a hug.

“So this is how our friendship ends.” Baekhyun coolly studies his nails, addressing Jongdae.

“Ignore him. He just finished confessing his undying love for Kyungsoo.”

“LIES! This is why I fired you.” Baekhyun piped up.

“I quit.” Luhan reminded Baekhyun.

“Get out.” Baekhyun scowled at the same time Jongdae added “I like you.”

“Taken!” Luhan sang from his therapist chair.

“Unlike poor Baekhyun.” Jongdae patted Baekhyun’s head, who tried to bite his hand. "So sad. Poor baby, your love for Do Kyungsoo is probably unrequited."

"And the nature of your affection surmised by the entire population of Seoul." Luhan adds.

"Shut it. I don't love him." Baekhyun scowls at Luhan.

"Of course you don't." Jongdae snickered.

Outside the office, Jongin sat wondering why the hell he was studying so hard if the man pulling in such a big check at the end of each year did nothing but sit at his desk and act like a 10 year old.

“I HATE YOU ALL!” Baekhyun’s scream pierced through his office door.

Scratch that: 5 year old.

“PLUS HE HAS COOTIES!”

Jongin proceeded to bash his head against his desk. Repeatedly.

~~~~

“You have convinced me.”

“I’m sorry?” Kris looked up from the excel sheet opened on his laptop to stare at Kyungsoo.

SOMEONE had to work around the office.

“You have convinced me. I will go out there, and slay Byun Baekhyun’s heart.”

“Um…sure.”

“I will woo him.”

“Or ask him out.”

“Court him. He will be mine!” Kyungsoo plowed on, eyes glazed over.

Kris faceplamed. Hard.

~~~

The next time Baekhyun saw Kyungsoo was at a gala dinner hosted by a mutual friend.

“Baekhyun.”

“Kyungsoo.”

 “Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?”

“I’m…sorry?”

“BECAUSE I’M SURE THE THOUGHT OF EVEN GOD REJECTING YOU MUST HURT PRETTY BAD! HA! HAHA!” Kyungsoo panicked and fled.

“That went well.” Yixing patted his shoulder.

“I will conquer his heart.” Kyungsoo mumbled to himself over and over as he hid his face in his hands, and Kris absently patted his back trying hard not to laugh.

Yixing responded by pulling out his phone and tapping away.

~~~~

“HE WAS TRYING TO HIT ON YOU! GO BACK THERE!” Luhan screeched.

How Luhan had managed to get in to this gala was beyond Baekhyun, but he had learnt long ago to not question the powers that be.

“I can’t! He hates me!!” Having come to terms with his feelings for Kyungsoo, Baekhyun was now more forthcoming with his emotions. “ARGH! CURSE HIS PERFECTION!"

“This is mildly disturbing.” Jongin whispered to Luhan, having only seen Baekhyun be mean to Kyungsoo.

“That’s because you’re weak.” Luhan whispered back, before pushing Baekhyun in Kyungsoo’s direction, cackling like a maniac."Go get 'em!"

Somewhere in Busan, Minseok shifted in his seat, feeling uneasy. It was time to give Luhan a call.

~~~~

“Hey, Kyungsoo.”

Kyungsoo looked up from chanting his mantra to come face to face with Baekhyun.

“What do you want?’ he snapped. “I – I mean, Yes?” Kyungsoo attempted a smile when Kris nudged him.

Baekhyun stared at him for a while, then wordlessly turned around and walked away.

“How did it go?” Jongin asked when Baekhyun returned.

“His lips form a heart when he smiles.” Baekhyun replied faintly.

Jongdae cackled and snapped a picture of Baekhyun on his phone, before immersing himself in his phone once again. Somewhere in the back, Luhan got off his phone, wondering if he was dating a psychic.

And Kyungsoo was hiding behind his hands again, murmuring things that sounded like “Conquering hearts” and “Slaying the prince.” Amongst other things.

And Yixing, well, Yixing continued documenting his boss’ heartbreak on his phone.

While Kris decided to book the next flight to Canada.

~~~~~

“This is so stupid.” Luhan pulled at his hair as the night was coming to an end. “Why is it so hard to just ask him out?”

“Ask who out?’ Jongdae appeared phone in hand.

“Kyungsoo.” Luhan provided.

“Oh. Oh, no! Now, why would you do that? Think this through. Are you sure you want to go out there and date another CEO whose company is one of our biggest rivals? Plus, you’ve done nothing but be mean to him!” Jongdae blurted out.

“You’re right. I have been nothing but mean to him. I’ve been hiding behind a wall of mean words so he couldn’t see my heart! JONGDAE!” Baekhyun screamed, startling some of the guests.

“Jongdae!” He started again, voice softer. “I need to make up for this! I need to tell him I love him! Yes, yes, I love him! I love Do Kyungsoo!”

“Um… Isn’t this going a bit too fast?” Jongdae looked at Luhan who shrugged, while Jongin clapped gleefully.

“You go boss-man!” He cheered.

“Shut up slave.” Baekhyun said as he raced off to find Kyungsoo.

Again.

“It’s OK, Jongin. He’s just hiding behind a wall of mean words again.” Luhan patted Jongin’s shoulder.

“Nah. He just plain hates you.” Jongdae popped a lollipop in his mouth (where did he get that? Luhan wondered) and left the party, pulling out his phone again.

~~~~

“Kyungsoo.”

“Baekhyun.”

By now, the people at Kyungsoo’s table were getting pretty darn fed up.

Kyungsoo and Baekhyun continued to stare at each other, not saying a word for the next two minutes. (Yixing counted.)

“Just confess already!” An elder woman spoke up from the table, exasperated.

“SHUT UP AHJUMMA! CAN’T YOU SEE I’M TELEPATHICALLY CONVERSING? RUDE!” Baekhyun burst out, breaking eye contact with Kyungsoo.

“YEAH! SHEESH! Let’s go somewhere more private Baek.” Kyungsoo shot a scowl at the old lady and pulled Baekhyun by the elbow.

(He called me Baek! Baekhyun swooned inwardly.)

Yixing groaned and pulled out his phone as the old lady turned to him and started saying something about “young whippersnappers.” 

Our life is over. There goes our favorite drama.

Yixing typed out.

ing Kim Minseok and his boyfriend. It's all Minseok's fault.

Came the response.

Yixing looked up from his phone and met the smiling cat eyes of Kim Jongdae.

Somewhere in Busan, Minseok shivered as he settled in for the night.

~~~~

One week later, Minseok flew into Seoul to see his boyfriend who had extended his vacation yet again. He was feeling neglected, considering all the phone calls his boyfriend had neglected to return, and all the clipped monosyllabic texts.

“Jongdae!” Minseok greeted his friend as he walked into Jongdae’s office. At least he could feel welcome here.

“!”  Or not.

“Still upset about your favorite drama ending?”

“You could have persuaded him to take a vacation later. Or stay in Busan…forever! Or moved somewhere far away, taken him to the Himalayas and gotten him to give up his matchmaking ways!”

But Minseok wasn’t paying attention to Jongdae anymore. His attention was focused more on a piece of paper on his desk. “What is this?” He asked.

‘You’ll see!” Jongdae grinned as he hid the paper in his desk and kicked Minseok out of his office.

Minseok sighed and went in search for someone to pay attention to him.

~~~~

The perks of being a part of a big company is that you get invited to a lot of dinners. Which means lots of networking and lots of like – minded people.

It was with this thought in mind that Jongdae and Yixing met up an hour before dessert and pulled out a piece of paper that looked suspiciously like a sign-up sheet.

“You ready?” Jongdae asked.

“Yup.” Yixing grinned back.

~~~~

Somewhere from the back of the room, Luhan watched Yixing and Jongdae laughing and networking with a lot of people, a single sheet of paper held between their hands.  He cackled to himself and rubbed his hands together. A wild glint in his eyes that elicited a groan from his boyfriend’s mouth.

Across the room, Yixing and Jongdae both felt a chill run up their spine.

“Did you feel that?” Yixing asked.

“You did too? Freaky!” Sharing a look, Jongdae and Yixing both shook their heads and surveyed the room, before turning back to the sign-up sheet.

Club Name: “ing Kim Minseok.”

It's all his fault.

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[A/N]: FML. I'm sorry for this crap. OTL