Introduction

 Jay Point of view-

My mom was the one to persuade me to try out for an audition for JYP. I was nervous and I knew that I wasn’t good enough to be able to get accepted, but I did my best and went back home. There were so many people, some were more talented than I was and others weren’t so great. After a few days I forgot all about the audition because I didn’t receive a call until one day my cell phone rang and one of JYP’s representatives told me that I was accept and will be flying off to South Korea in a week.

To be honest I was excited and happy that I got this opportunity, but on the day that I was going to leave my hometown Seattle to South Korea my feet were glue to the floor as I hugged all my friends and family. I wanted to go pursue my dreams, but I didn’t want to leave my parents behind and I didn’t like the feeling of going to Korea because I knew nobody there.

It was a brand new world for me when I arrived at South Korea, I wanted to turn back and go home but I didn’t want to disappoint my parent and lose this opportunity that I got, so I kept my head high. I tried very hard to adjust to everything, but I shed tears every single night because I miss my family, friends and how I use to live in Seattle. School was different compare to American school, I couldn’t speak Korean or eat any of the Korean food and even though I’m Korean I felt like an outcast. The closest friends I have was the other boys that was sharing the house with me, but it was easier for them because they were able to communicate with each other in Korean except for this Thai boy by the name of Nickhun and I.

I didn’t like Korea because I didn’t have any family or friends there and it was hard to be so young and away from your family and friends while trying to adjust to this new lifestyle. They way Korean behave was totally different from American behavior and it was hard talking to my Korean friends here because I had to act differently compare to how I acted towards my friends back in America. Back home I could call my friends “idiot” “Fool” “Gay” “” and they would just laugh because it’s normal for us to speak like that, but I couldn’t say those kinds of things to my Korean friends because that’s not how you talk to one another. But as time goes by I grew to the culture and started appreciating it. Even though I am Korean America I loved my country and as time goes by instead of wanting to go home I wanted to stay in Korea with my people, but the only thing I wanted to go back was because of my family. Korea changed me into another person who I never thought I’d be, and being able to communicate and speak Korean my life became easier.

After a long hard four years of training we were able to stand on stage and become 2pm. I was surprised and shocked when JYP told me that he wanted me to be the leader of 2pm because I felt like I wasn’t good enough to deserve the leader position. 2pm reached to its height in popularity after our song Again and Again, but like they always say once you gain something you also lose another thing. 2pm gain so much love and support by our fans all around the world, but it became harder as our fame grew bigger, but we all kept our head high and support one another in a time of need. All 2pm members including me worked so hard every single day for this day to come and we all were so excited that our dreams were coming true until my old MySpace comments that I wrote to my friends a long time ago pop out again and hunt me. My heart felt like it’s been stab a million times when I saw the news and research it online, as I read the comment wrote by other people tears stream down my eyes.

One of my old comment I wrote to my friend was “Korean is gay.” everybody was offended by my comment but it was made years ago and I didn’t mean to say Korean is gay, it’s more like I didn’t like the situation I was in and I was angry because I couldn’t be Korean enough to fit in with other Korean. I didn’t mean it that way and my friends knew that, but the Korean society begins to turn their back on me. I wanted to explain, but it was too dangerous because everybody was so angry at me and I knew no one would listen to my words. For days I cried and I was embarrassed for what I’ve done and I will take responsibility for what I’ve done. Woo Young, Junsu, Junho, Taecyeon, Chansung and nickhun kept telling me that things will be fine as times passes by, but I knew it wasn’t going to be all right. I was ashame to stand on the stage again and face my fans after what I’ve said and at last I decided to leave after getting JYP’s permission. I never meant what I wrote in my Myspace I honestly loved my country, but when I first arrived It was hard for me to adjust to everything and I wrote that comment out of stress and anger but it’s not how I truly feel. After the plane landed in Seattle and I saw my family and friends waiting for me by the gate my tears begin to stream down my eyes as I walk to my mom’s open arms.

I stepped down from my leader position because I didn’t want to ruin the rest of 2pm’s dream just because of one thing that I did wrong, but things got worse after JYPE had a conference with the hottest, they were upset because I wasn’t coming back and they turn their back on the rest of 2pm or 1:59 if you may say so.

Our beloved and beautiful hottest turn their back and started saying that there’s no 2pm without me. I was happy that my fans loved me so much and supported me, but I felt like 2pm was crashing down because of me and I loved the 2pm just as if they were my own brothers. Even though it was me who caused everything not once did the 2pm members say it was my fault or blame me for anything.

I’m the one who caused all of this, I’m the one who brought 2pm down, and I was the one who turn our fans into anti because I wasn’t coming back and worst of all Taecyeon, chanSung, Nickhun, Junsu, Junho and Wooyoung are the one being attack. There’s nothing I can do but just pray that all of our fans will continue to support and love the boys with or without me.

End Of Jaybum’s POV